Rating: T
Time-line: Pre-season 1 (Wally is 13, Dick is 11)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Family, Friendship
Summary: Finding out that his son's best friend was being abused was the last thing Bruce expected to hear when he answered the phone. And he certainly hadn't been expecting to help the league's resident speedster through a panic attack.
Word Count: 4500
Trigger Warning: Mentions of child abuse, panic attacks
Disclaimer: The panic attack that Barry experiences in this is purely based on my own experience with anxiety attacks and everyone's anxiety, PTSD, or panic or anxiety attacks look different. Please be aware that this is just my perspective, and that it can look different for every person, and their own individual needs when they are experiencing an attack. If you're a witness of somebody experiencing an attack, please ask them what you can do to help them, since everyone has individual needs.
Bruce was in his home office trying to get caught up on some paperwork. He had been working on a particularly important case as Batman the past few days and his Bruce Wayne work had gotten pushed to today and Luscious had been bugging him that today was the absolute latest for getting it all done. Luckily he didn't have any distractions at the moment since he had wrapped up the Batman case last night and Dick had gone straight to Barry's to hang out with Wally after school.
Unfortunately, his paperwork wouldn't get done until tomorrow. Although Bruce didn't know that that would be the case when he went to answer his cellphone.
He looked at the caller I.D. already wondering what kind of trouble Wally and Dick could have gotten into. Dick had only been over there for a few hours. Although he should have known from experience that that was more than enough time for the boys to get into trouble. That being the case, Barry hardly ever called him unless it was something really wrong that he couldn't deal with himself.
He rolled his eyes thinking back to the last phone call like that.
"Uh, Bruce? I'msosorry, IthinkIlostyourkid. They were playing hide and seek and I can't find them anywhere! I know your kid's a frickin' ninja but it's been two hours!" Bruce sighed, exasperated, and had zeta'd to Central finding the boys by merely calling to Robin and the boys appeared within seconds. Although they never did figure out where their hiding spot was. That had been a few years ago though when the boys had been much younger. The only other times Barry tended to call when Dick was over were if Dick had a nightmare that was so bad even Wally, Barry, and Iris couldn't help him and he needed Bruce. But it wasn't even dinner time yet, so Bruce doubted that was the case.
He even briefly wondered if Dick had been kidnapped or if they had gone on a patrol in Central and one of the boys had been injured. It wouldn't be the first time for either of those suspicions.
He doubted it was actually anything that drastic. It was probably just his paranoia. Barry was likely just calling to complain about some prank the boys had played on him or because the boys had begged him to let Dick spend the night.
Out of all the possibilities that had gone through his head though, he was, unknowingly, completely unprepared as he picked up the phone.
"Hello?" Bruce asked, trying to keep a sigh out of his voice, as he signed another document.
"Bruce."
Bruce dropped his pen and immediately stood up. Barry had all but sobbed the single word. Meaning something was very, very, wrong. Bruce jumped to the worst conclusion wondering if someone had died.
"Barry, what's wrong?" He was already moving towards the door of his office when another choked sob came through the phone.
"Bruce, I...Bruce I failed. I don't know what to do. I failed Wally, Bruce."
Bruce quickly grabbed his jacket, and Alfred (He's not quite sure when he got there) took it from him, helping him slip it on so that he wouldn't drop the phone. Even if he hadn't said anything yet, Bruce was sure that his old Butler was able to clearly read his distress.
"Barry. I need you to tell me what happened."
"Wally's dad is, he's being abused," Barry couldn't stop the ugly sob the ripped from his throat. "For six years. Bruce, I work with those cases all the time, I should have- why didn't I see it?" Bruce could practically feel Barry's self-loathing through the device.
He was shocked.
Batman, Bruce Wayne, was shocked.
Out of everything that he had expected Barry to say when he picked up the phone, this wasn't even on his radar. Had Barry said that this had been going on for six years? That meant it had been going on for the entire time that Bruce had even known Wally. And Bruce was supposed to be the world's greatest detective. Yet when his son's best friend was being abused, he didn't even notice? If Barry thought it was his fault, Bruce wasn't any less to blame.
"I'm on my way. I'm taking the zeta." Screw the fact that Bruce NEVER took the zeta in his civilian attire. This was Wally. Dick's best friend. The one who came every year on the anniversary to be with Dick. The one who Dick had trusted enough to disobey him and reveal his secret identity to. Bruce wouldn't forgive himself if he didn't repay Wally now for everything he had done for Dick. Barry loved Wally like a son. As much as Bruce loved Dick. Bruce knows that Barry would be there in a heartbeat if something happened to Dick (he had before) so of course Bruce was going to help them now.
Bruce hung up the phone as he walked to the study. He turned the clock hands to the time of his parents' death and quickly made his way down the stairs to the Batcave and to the Zeta Tube in it, setting the location to Central City.
The familiar feeling of his being teleported washed over him and he was greeted with the sight of a dingy alley in Central City.
He put on his hat and sunglasses, making his way down the street a bit away from the alley before calling an Uber. Usually, Bruce didn't risk relying on strangers for transportation. But he wasn't in Gotham and Central City was a relatively safe city and he was in disguise. Besides, it was the fastest way to get to Barry and Wally.
The Uber driver picked him up shortly and it was a twenty-minute ride to Barry's house.
It felt like an hour.
He got out of the car, absent-mindedly handing the driver a fifty-dollar bill, only distantly aware of his gaping expression as he exited the vehicle.
Bruce walked up to the modest-looking front porch, briefly debating if he should even knock since just the screen door was shut, and ultimately decided he should.
A few moments later Iris appeared at the door, looking more disheveled than Bruce had ever seen her. Like Alfred, she almost always seemed to be put together. She was always the one to comfort Barry after a rough patrol night, or help tend to his more minor wounds at home. She always had food ready living with a speedster and it was practically Wally's second home. Although Bruce grimly thought that now it would be his actual home. Not that Barry and Iris would mind. They loved Wally. But Bruce was sure it would still be an adjustment period.
"Bruce!" She said, her voice sounding slightly hoarse. Her eyes were swollen and tinted red, and the tear tracks on her face were obvious.
He'd have to remember to have Alfred make a casserole (or many) for them. The last thing Iris needed to do was worry about cooking.
"Iris, I came as soon as Barry called. I-" Bruce didn't even know what else to say. What was there to say?
Iris just nodded, pulling him into a brief hug, that he returned. She led him to the living room and he could see Wally and Dick sitting on the couch. Barry was sitting next to Wally with his armed wrapped around his nephew.
"It's gonna be fine, Wally," He murmured, kissing the top of his nephew's head. Wally was staring off into space and didn't look like he'd heard a word of what Barry had said.
Barry looked up, a grim expression on his face.
The look shook Bruce to his core. He had never seen such a truly devastated look on his friend.
It didn't matter how rough the mission got. How injured or exhausted he was. How truly despicable the villain was. Even when Wally had been injured before.
He'd seen Barry upset. He'd seen him angry. But he had never seen him look so utterly broken.
The expression looked wrong on the speedster and he hoped he'd never have to see the look on his face again.
Iris filled him in telling him that the police had already come and gone and that Mary and Rudy had already been arrested.
They were going to start the custody case tomorrow.
Bruce assured her he would get them the best lawyers he had at his disposal to ensure they'd win the case and that Mary and Rudy wouldn't get off the hook.
She just thanked him, her gaze still on the boys. Eventually, after several phone calls were made Iris took over watching the boys. Bruce was sitting at the kitchen table on his laptop still sorting out the legal side of things.
He heard slow footsteps approach from the hallway. He looked up when they paused by the entrance to the kitchen.
Barry looked defeated.
Bruce was surprised to see him in his Flash costume. Barry must be out of his mind if he was thinking about patrolling tonight. Besides, Bruce had already called Oliver and Clark to alternate patrolling Central for at least the next week.
"I didn't know you were still here," His voice had a dead quality to it that Bruce had never heard in the speedster's voice before.
"I'm still contacting lawyers," Bruce answered, still studying Barry. Out of everyone involved, he seemed to be taking it the hardest. Not that Bruce didn't understand why. He's sure he would be a wreck if something similar happened to Dick.
"You're in costume," Bruce stated, although there was clearly a question behind it.
"Yeah. I'm going for a run. I...need to clear my head." Barry said with a grimace.
Bruce nodded, turning back to his laptop. Barry stood in the doorway a few moments more, his breaths shallow, then Bruce heard the front door slam shut and the wind chimes cling as a flash of red sped down the street.
He continued to work for the next twenty minutes until he was sure he had done all he could for the night concerning the legal process. He went ahead and called in a delivery order from Wally's favorite Chinese restaurant. (He and Dick had gone all the way to Central to pick it up during one of their sleepovers at the manor when he had been at a Wayne Enterprise social gathering.)
He was sure Dick would be spending the night. He didn't bother going back to the manor to grab his stuff though since he knew that Dick kept a spare set of everything he needed at the Allens house "just to be prepared for emergency sleepovers because you said I should always be prepared, Bruce." Wally had stuff at the manor too.
Wally.
Bruce doesn't know how he didn't see it. It had been going on for the entire time Bruce had known the boy. Of course, he had suspected something was off on occasion, especially as of late. But he assumed it was issues at school or just minor issues at home He never would have guessed anything to this scale.
Bruce looked up as he, once again, heard footsteps approaching.
Iris stood in the doorway, her arms hugging herself, still looking more tired and unkempt than Bruce had ever seen the redheaded woman before.
"You shouldn't be working in the dark," She said, turning the kitchen lights on.
"I didn't realize how late it'd gotten," He looked out the window and saw that the streetlights had come on.
"Coffee?" Iris asked, already getting down a mug for herself.
"Yes, thank you," He saw her grabbing a third cup. "Barry's not here. He went for a run."
Iris turned to look at him, worry in her eyes.
"He did?" She bit her lip, her eyes gazing out the window to the street her husband had run down half an hour before.
"Yes. He said he needed to clear his head." Bruce followed her gaze.
"How long ago?" She tried not to let her anxiousness seep into her voice, but Bruce still picked up on it.
"About half an hour."
"He...He's not taking it well," She said as she grabbed her own cup of coffee, looking down into it. "Not that any of us are, but I think he might still be in shock and I was with the boys so I didn't see him, but when I did...I just think he might not be thinking clearly and he blames himself and-" Iris rambled until Bruce strode over to her, putting a hand on her shoulder, causing her to look up at him.
"I'll check the tracker in his suit if it makes you feel better."
Iris' lips twitched into a weak smile
"Yeah, I'd appreciate it, Bruce." Bruce pulled out his tracking device in his briefcase. If activated is could show the whereabouts of any of the members in the league. While the league drew the line at getting tracking devices implanted, they did agree to get them in their suits for reasons such as this.
He frowned seeing that the red dot wasn't moving. It was at Mt. Justice. The old league headquarters before the location had been compromised. He didn't know what Barry was doing there; But the fact that the speedster had gone for a run and his tracker showed that he'd been in the same spot for the last ten minutes was concerning.
Iris looked at the tracker worriedly.
"Bruce-"
"I'll go check on him, Iris."
"Thank you."
"Don't worry about dinner. I have Wally's favorite coming and it should be delivered shortly."
"You have no idea how much we appreciate your help, Bruce," Iris said, practically melting in relief at the prospect of not having to figure out dinner on top of everything else going on.
"I know you and Barry would do the same," He said, nodding and putting his coat on.
He used an Uber to get back to the Zetatube and zeta'd to Mt. Justice. It was dark and stormy when Bruce stepped outside of the mountain. The rain wasn't too bad yet, but it was cold and there was definitely a spray of water coming from the ocean.
His eyes scanned the beach until he spotted the red costume-clad hero curled up by the side of the mountain, shaking and almost looking like he was having a seizure, causing Bruce's heart to leap into his throat. He ran over to Barry, putting a hand on his shoulder, intending to turn him over to better assess what was wrong. But Barry let out a strangled gasp, yanking his shoulder free from Bruce's grasp. Another vibration wracked his body, and he coughed violently.
His hand clenched the sand as he half sat up, still coughing and hacking, and gasping, making Bruce wonder he was getting any air at all. He was surprised to see the speedster's cowl pulled back revealing his dirt-smudged face. His face was covered in a mix of tears and sand, leaving muddy tear tracks down his face. His eyes were clenched shut in an expression of pain. When he finally stopped coughing, another sob, left his mouth, causing his whole body to shiver.
"Barry," Bruce said, as gently as he could. He didn't want to startle him again by touching him, but he wanted him to be aware that he was there.
Barry just sat with his eyes clenched shut, and his breathing spiraling more with every breath, his hands clenched into fists.
Another sob wracked his frame.
It was honestly disturbing to Bruce to see the bouncy energetic speedster so defeated and broken and scared. He had never seen Barry look as scared as he did now. Even when they were fighting against aliens, and the worst the world had to offer. Even the times when they were all sure they wouldn't make it out alive. If Barry had looked scared during any of those times then he looked terrified now.
"It's going to be okay, Barry."
Clearly, Barry was having a panic attack. He'd helped Dick through them in the past and even Wally a couple of times. Both of them reveled in physical touch and needed it to help ground them and to keep them from spiraling further. Bruce knew that Barry was also very much a physical touch person.
Bruce was not.
But Bruce had managed to work through his qualms about physical touch when helping Dick and Wally so surely he could for Barry as well.
He helped Barry into a sitting position instead of the hunched posture he had been in before. He put his arm around his shoulder bringing him to lean against himself.
Sometimes he forgot how young Barry was.
He was only in his mid-twenties and was the youngest founding member of the Justice League.
He always seemed to have the perfect civilian life. A stable job. A wife. A house. Things many heroes strive for and find too hard to maintain while being a hero. He can't even count how many League members had tried dating civilians only for the relationship to fail. Yet Barry had somehow not only maintained a relationship with a civilian, but they had quite a healthy marriage as well. Things many of the league members longed for.
But it was times like these that Bruce was reminded that there were still civilian problems that come with having such an involved home life and that sometimes can hurt worse than any blow a villain can deal you.
Bruce tightened his grip on Barry as the slight drizzle quickly turned to pouring rain. They weren't fully exposed due to the overhang of the mountain above them, but they were definitely wet.
Barry gasped again, choking on the breath, before letting out another cough.
"Just breathe, Barry."
Bruce remembered all of the research he had done after Dick had had his first panic attack. He had researched grounding techniques, coping mechanisms, things to help in the aftermath of a panic attack, and how to avoid them.
He steadied his own breaths, intentionally making them as calm and even as possible.
Barry's head was on his shoulder, and he had a death grip on Bruce's arm that was wrapped around his shoulders.
Bruce took another deep breath.
He could tell Barry tried to copy him, but his breath ended up choked and he started hyperventilating again.
"Just focus on breathing, Barry. Don't worry about anything else right now. Just try to copy my breathing."
Barry half inhaled before another sob shook his frame, and he exhaled sharply.
Bruce focused on making his own breathing as calm as possible.
He could feel Barry's grip on his arm tightened as he tried again.
And again.
And again.
Before, finally, he was able to take a successful breath.
Bruce tightened his grip slightly each time he felt the speedster's breath hitch, or he inhaled a bit too sharply, or a sob ripped its way past his throat.
Barry's head sagged further down onto Bruce's shoulder and he leaned more heavily against the billionaire as the adrenaline and panic began to fade.
After a few moments, Barry's hand dropped into his lap from where he had been gripping Bruce's arm, leaving Bruce's arm throbbing slightly but he didn't mention it.
Bruce knew Barry probably still needed some time to collect himself and calm down, but it also wouldn't do anybody any good if he got sick on top of trying to sort all of this out.
"Barry." He waited a few seconds for a response but the speedster didn't so much as twitch, making Bruce wonder if he had even heard him or if he was just too lost in his thoughts.
"Barry," He said a little firmer than last time, shaking the blond's shoulder slightly.
There was another pause and Bruce was about to address him a third time when he finally answered.
"What?" His voice sounded hoarse and raw.
"Let's get inside. It's pouring."
Bruce stood up, hauling the speedster to his feet. He shifted his arm to be under Barry's shoulder to support him.
Bruce led them over to the entrance of the cave, punching in his code.
He grabbed a couple of towels from the hanger before they entered the main living space.
He grimaced at the hideous green couches as he laid the towels down on them so that they wouldn't completely ruin them. He glanced over at Barry who was standing with his arms crossed, and his shoulders slumped, with a distant look on his face.
He grabbed Barry's arm leading him over to the couch, forcing him to sit down.
Barry leaned over, with his elbows on his knees and his face buried in his hands.
Bruce knelt in front of him, his brow creasing in concern at the silent speedster. The whole time he'd been with him he'd only said one word and Bruce is pretty sure that other than when he was sleeping that that must have been the longest Bruce had ever been around the speedster without hearing him talk.
He dropped his hands and looked at Bruce looking exhausted and devastated.
Barry's mouth twitched into a humorless smile, and he ducked his head letting out a watery, self-deprecating laugh. He shook his head, abruptly cutting off the sound.
"I can't do this, Bruce," He whispered in a broken voice.
Bruce sat next to him, putting a hand on his shoulder.
"You're not alone, Barry." He said, sternly. "We're going to help you get through this. I've already contacted the best lawyers I know, I have no doubt that you'll win the custody case-"
Barry shook his head, causing Bruce to pause in the middle of his sentence.
"I-" He took a shuddering breath, closing his eyes for a moment. "Bruce, I don't know if I can do this," he repeated. "Raising a kid? I mean, I failed Wally, Bruce. I should have noticed. I work with those cases every day! I should have- I should have-"
He sounded like he was about to start hyperventilating again.
"Breathe, Barry," Bruce reminded, his grip on Barry's shoulder tightening.
So that's what this was about. Why Barry was taking it all so hard. It wasn't the lawyers or the custody issues. He was scared of becoming a parent and failing his kid.
It took Barry a few seconds to regain control of his gasping breaths before continuing in an unsteady voice.
"I love Wally, Bruce. But I just don't know if I can...I don't want to fail him again," he whispered.
"You will. Barry, you can't avoid failure. Do you think I've never failed Dick? I do, all the time and I know you know that." He growled slightly, seeing that Barry was going to cut him off. "Barry, there's no such thing as a perfect parent. And it's hard. I'm not going to lie to you Barry. What you're going through is hard. It's hard," he said, squeezing his shoulder tightly to emphasize his point.
"Not everybody just gets parenting thrown at them out of the blue with no prior warning. But I know you and Iris can do it, Barry." At least with Dick it had been Bruce's decision. It may have been abrupt. But Bruce had had time to decide and prepare beforehand. He hadn't just had a kid dropped in his lap with no prior warning.
"Every parent fails their kid, but that doesn't make them a bad parent. It doesn't make you a bad parent," he emphasized. "What defines you is what you do after. What matters is that you help him get through this. That you give him something better. Even with the failures, they don't outweigh you trying to do right by him, Barry. You love Wally and anyone can see that. But you're not going to be alone in this. Alfred and I will still be here to help you. Iris is here for you. The whole league is behind you in this, and we believe in you, Barry." He looked him dead in the eyes making sure he was getting through to him,
Barry gave another watery laugh, shaking a few more tears free from his eyes, before breaking eye contact. "Didn't know that you did pep talks, Bats," he said, shakily, before wiping the tears off his face.
Bruce rolled his eyes but was relieved to see Barry's usual humor seeping through. "Don't get used to it," he warned.
Barry just shook his head, as Bruce got to his feet. "Wouldn't dream of it," he said, as Bruce grabbed his arm, pulling him to his feet. Instead of letting go though, Barry wrapped his arms around him in a hug.
Bruce still wasn't one for physical affection, but if it meant he'd never have to see that broken shell of his friend again, Bruce would hug him as long as he needed.
"We'll figure this out, Barry."
Barry finally pulled away, a shaky smile on his lips. Good. He was getting better.
"I know. I know," he said wiping more tears away with his gloved hand. "Thanks, Bruce."
Bruce nodded back at him.
He would be okay.
Bruce would make sure they all were.
Thanks for reading! I hope you all enjoyed this one-shot. Keep your eyes out for more that I'll be posting soon and be sure to follow to get notified every time I post/update if you liked the story.
Love y'all to the moon and back! Have a great day!
~SunshineGirl14