Harry had been heading down to the Great Hall for lunch when Malfoy returned from October break, having just come back from his own break at the Burrow the night before. He passed by him in the corridor and as he passed, noticed the dead look in his eyes, bruising round his neck. It looked like his feet were carrying him automatically, not seeing anything in front of him. His face was stone cold.
Harry watched him pass, and later on in the day checked the marauders map. Draco was in his bed, as he was later in the day, and later. He never moved. Was he okay? Harry wondered. Was he taking drugs again? Maybe he was blacked out. He stayed up tossing and turning. With Malfoy not fighting anymore and with Harry having confiscated his drugs, Harry hadn't given another thought to Malfoy's plea that night weeks ago. Don't let me go home, he had said. But he had gone home, and now he didn't look okay at all.
Harry picked up the map again, as he wasn't managing to sleep. But when he looked at the Slytherin dorms, he frowned. Malfoy wasn't there.
He scoured the map, searching for places he might have gone.
"Where the hell are you?" He muttered. Then finally he spotted him, the little dot labelled 'Draco Malfoy' making its way to the Prefects' Bathroom.
Harry battled with himself on whether to go or not. Maybe he just wanted a private place to use the bathroom? Or maybe he was looking for a quiet place to shoot up again?
After battling with himself for a minute, he picked up his invisibility cloak and tip-toed over to Ron's bed, shaking his shoulder.
"Mmm, what? What's going on?" Ron mumbled, half asleep.
"What's the password to the Prefect's Bathroom?" Harry whispered.
"Huh... Pumpkin Pasties" Ron mumbled, and rolled back over, immediately snoring again.
Harry slipped on his invisibility cloak and ran quietly down to the Prefect's bathroom, pushing the door open and sliding in silently, stopping dead at seeing Malfoy standing there, completely naked in the dim light, standing with his back to Harry in front of the mirror's at the sinks so Harry had a view of his entirety from behind and down to his waist from the front. He had his head bowed and was staring unblinkingly down at his hands.
He was too skinny, was Harry's first thought as he stared at him, he looked malnourished. He was also bruised, in the torso and round his neck and wrists. Harry silently took a few steps closer and stopped, noticing now what Malfoy was staring down at. There was blood on his finger tips, fresh blood. Draco stared at it for a second longer before blinking rapidly, letting out a shaky exhale and running his hands under the taps, violently scrubbing it off with soap.
Has he hurt someone? Harry wondered. But how would he have got his clothes off without wiping the blood off? Draco began to pull his clothes back on, wincing as he did so, and Harry got a full view of him as he turned, it didn't look like he was bleeding from anywhere. Then he reached into a box on the floor and pulled things out putting them in the sink and doing something with them. Harry didn't want to get too close in case he alerted him to his presence. But a second later Draco leaned back against a toilet stall so he was side on to Harry. He held a teaspoon and lifted the lighter, flicking it on, melting the substance in the teaspoon. The lighter illuminating Draco's face which now had a single tear rolling down it. Draco wasn't bleeding anywhere that Harry could see, why was he crying? Why was he - oh no. It suddenly all came together, where the blood was from, why Draco had looked numb, dead, why he was about to do drugs again.
No! Harry thought. And without stopping to think about his actions, he threw off his invisibility cloak and strode up to him, smacking the lighter out of Malfoy's hand, knocking it down on the ground.
"Don't!" Harry said desperately. "Don't do it!"
Draco had jumped violently when Harry appeared in front of him, and now stared at him in shock and fear.
Harry grabbed his wrists, taking the teaspoon of heroin away and throwing it in the sink. "Don't Malfoy"
Malfoy just stared down at Harry holding his already bruised wrists in a tight grip and started to hyperventilate, breathing quickly, and make a whimpering noise, trying to pull himself away, tears now flowing down his cheeks.
Harry looked down and suddenly realised what he was doing. He had been right then, he thought, devastated, letting go of Malfoy's wrist and backing up a few steps.
"Hey no, I'm not going to hurt you, I'm here to help" Harry said quickly.
But Draco was having a full on panic attack, sliding to the floor and grabbing his hair, sobbing and hyperventilating.
Harry stared in panic for a minute then dropped down too. Reaching out then thinking better of it.
"Malfoy please, don't cry" Harry said, completely unsure of what to do. He thought hard as Draco continued to sob.
"I'll... I'll be your sponsor!" Harry said desperately.
Draco's sobs and quick breathing slowed down just a little, his hands slowly releasing his hair, he uncurled and looked up at Harry, his watery, mercurial eyes searching Harry's emerald ones for signs of mockery.
"What?" He whispered through his tears. His body still shook.
"I'll be your sponsor, I'll help you through this" Harry told him, with determination, glad the panic attack had somewhat subsided for now. "I mean I don't know how to be a sponsor, but I can find out."
"You're lying, you hate me, you blackmailed me" Draco said, his voice pained.
Harry looked down, ashamed, but nodded. "I hated the way you spoke to my friends, the names you call them, the way you bully people, and all that would have to stop for this to work. But I know you don't want this, and I know you don't deserve to have your life ruined over a drug addiction"
Draco stared at him for a long moment, deciding whether to trust Harry or not. Eventually he nodded slowly, sitting up a little and wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, still keeping his distance from Harry. "I can stop, I mean, I'll try my best, at everything" he bit his lip.
"We can work it all out" Harry said, then remembered the blood. "But first we need to get you healed"
"I'm fine" was the quick, shaky response.
Harry looked at him and shook his head. "No you're not, I saw the blood on your fingers when I came in, and you're not bleeding from anywhere visible"
"It was a nosebleed"
"You strip off, cry and start taking heroin over a nosebleed?" Harry asked with a disbelieving raised brow.
Draco's face crumpled and he looked down at the floor, and immediately Harry knew he shouldn't have been flippant.
"Shit sorry Malfoy, I shouldn't have said that. But I know that's not where the blood came from, and if I've made the right guess then we need to get you healed and make sure you're okay. You don't need to tell me about it" Harry rushed to say, as shameful tears started to fall from Draco's eyes again. "But I will ask that you let me get Hermione. She's been training to become a Healer after school and I know she can heal these types of injuries"
"No!" Malfoy said. "I've been awful to her, I can't ask her to heal me! And what if she tells people?" Draco was panicking again, staring at Harry with scared eyes.
"She won't Malfoy, she's not like that" Harry reassured him. "Trust me okay?"
Malfoy just stared at him for a second, looking scared to hope that he could trust someone, then he looked back down at his lap and Harry took that as permission.
He cast a quick Patronus asking Hermione to get to the boy's Prefect bathroom, including the password and instructions to bring medical supplies. It was less than five minutes before she turned up and ran into bathroom, carrying a potions case.
"Harry! Are you alri -" She broke off, shocked to see Malfoy in front of Harry, and in the state he was in.
"I'm fine Hermione, but we need some medical assistance if possible" he said softly and gave her a small, sad smile.
Hermione walked slowly closer until she was beside Harry and looked beside them, seeing the teaspoon, lighter and syringe.
"Okay" she said. "Can one of you fill me in on what's happened?"
Harry looked at Malfoy, who couldn't look either of them in the eyes, he just stayed where he was, shaking and avoiding eye contact.
Harry turned to her. "There's some drug use, by injection" Harry started quietly. "But also... sexual assault" he glanced at Draco, who flinched and closed his eyes tightly.
Hermione stared at Harry in shock, and bit her lip, nodding.
"Okay, Malfoy, are you on these drugs now?" she asked gently, also kneeling down so she was at the same level as the other two, but wisely keeping her distance from Malfoy.
He shook his head.
"Okay that's good." Hermione paused, then spoke carefully. "You do have the option to press charges against whoever assaulted you. We can take you to St Mungo's or I can record the diagnosis from my wand and we can send it to them. Is that something you would like to do?"
"No!" Malfoy said quickly, fear clouding his eyes. "No, I - I don't know who it was" he looked away, and Harry and Hermione exchanged dubious glances.
Hermione continued on, not pushing him.
"I'm going to conjure a stretcher okay, if you can get on it and undress from the waist down, we'll take care of any internal injuries first." Harry had to hand it to her, she was very professional, gentle but firm, not showing pity, but compassion for the situation. She conjured the stretcher.
"Harry" Hermione continued "Can you please lock and secure the door?"
"Malfoy I'm going to need you to undress from the waist down please" she said.
Malfoy pulled his knees in tighter to himself.
"I need to use potions to stop any internal bleeding" Hermione told him calmly. "I know how intrusive this must feel, which is the last thing you'll want, but it's important to heal these wounds now so they don't get infected"
Malfoy looked up at her with haunted eyes and Harry glanced over, seeing him absent-mindedly rub his bruised wrists, looking down at his lap again.
Harry finished his locking charms and waved at Hermione, getting her attention. He pointed at his wrists making a loop around one with his other hand. She gave a small nod of comprehension. She quickly looked around and saw Draco's wand on the ground. She picked it up and gave it to him. He took it from her quickly, holding onto it for dear life.
"You can hold onto your wand, and Harry and I can put ours on the floor where you can see them. I only need potions to heal this part so you can watch them the entire time" she suggested. Draco seemed to think about it then nodded.
"Okay" he said, hoarsely.
She and Harry turned around to give him some privacy while he undressed, and climbed onto the stretcher. Hermione turned back around and started getter her potions ready. Harry stayed turned to give Draco as much privacy and security as he could.
Hermione picked up a few potions. Unstoppering one.
"I'm going to need to touch you, is that okay?"
Draco tensed but nodded. Tensing further, burying his face and gripping the edge of the stretcher as Hermione spread his cheeks apart, she quickly dropped five drops of the potion, and Draco gripped the stretcher even harder and bit down on the pillow as he felt the internal wounds burn and stitch themselves up.
"There's two more to go, we're going to do the same thing again"
Hermione repeated the process twice more with different antiseptic and anti-inflammatory potions. At the sting of the antiseptic, Malfoy jerked and let out a small keening noise and Harry wished he could turn around and tell him he'd be okay.
After that was done, Draco pulled his clothes back on and Hermione asked him to turn over. Harry also turned back around now that he was decent.
"I'm going to need my wand now to make sure you haven't contracted any diseases from either the drugs or the assault" she brought one side of the stretcher up so Draco could sit up.
"That's possible?" Draco asked weakly.
"I'm afraid so. It's not as common in the Wizarding World as in the muggle world but it can still be contracted through unsafe sex and unclean syringes here"
Hermione did a few checks with her wand and a white light settled over Draco's body. After a few seconds it turned green and disappeared.
"You haven't caught anything so that's great news" Hermione smiled and Draco sagged in relief. "I still need to do a few more checks though"
She carried on with her examination, putting a healing balm on the injection points on his elbow, the scrapes and bruises on his wrists, the bruising on his torso and the bruising around his neck. Harry's eyes narrowed as he saw the imprint of a hand around the back of the pale, slender neck, and images of someone holding him down, while his wrists were bound, taking him from behind, swarmed Harry's mind. It was the first time it felt real, this had really happened to the blonde in front of him. Harry tried to stop rage from overwhelming him.
She cast a few more spells and Harry could see her eyebrows knitting together, biting her lip. She handed Malfoy two potions.
"You can take one of these now, and the other one in about 12 hours" she instructed him, and he nodded. "They'll give you a nutrition boost and help your weakened immune system." She looked at his bandaged arm. "Did you hurt your arm? I can have a look at that too" she began to reach for the bandage but Malfoy jumped off the stretcher and backed up a few paces quickly.
"No it's fine" he said shakily. Hermione and Harry looked at him for a second, and Hermione nodded.
"Okay if you're sure" she said calmly, and then continued on in a gentle voice. "That's me pretty much done here then, it will take a little time for everything to feel normal again but it shouldn't be more than a day or so. We should talk about the heroin though, it is heroin right?"
Malfoy nodded, shame written all over his face.
"We could look into some rehabilitation centres, or -"
"No! They would have to tell my family, I can't go there, and I can't take time out of school or let anyone know, I'll be expelled" Draco said adamantly.
"Well you need to stop taking it otherwise you will definitely be expelled. You can't hide the damage it's doing to you forever" She said matter-of-factly.
"I'm going to try and help with that" Harry told her. "And I was hoping you might be able to help me with some research on how to do it" he asked his friend hopefully.
"Harry... I don't know that we're equipped to provide what Malfoy needs with this" she told him carefully.
"He's stopped before" Harry argued, looking at Malfoy, who was avoiding his eyes. "He can do it again, and properly this time. We'll get rid of the drugs and everything that goes with it and we'll start figuring out ways to get through this"
"You can't be there one hundred percent of the time Harry" Hermione said quietly.
"Can we please try it?" Draco asked quietly. "I can't be expelled, or have people know about this. If - if it goes wrong, or if Potter can't deal with me anymore" he glanced up at Harry, "then I'll go to one of those places, but just, not yet, please?" he begged them.
Harry and Hermione looked at each other for a few seconds, Harry nodded just slightly and Hermione sighed.
"Fine, but Malfoy, please know that I am here too, if Harry's not around when you need him to talk to, then please come to me"
Harry smiled gratefully at his friend.
"Thank you" Draco whispered.
Hermione gathered up her things. "I'll make the galleons like we had for the DA and then the three of us can keep in contact. Goodnight you two" and with that, she exited the bathroom, leaving Harry and Draco in an awkward silence.
"I guess the first step would be to get rid of all this" Harry suggested, indicating at the gear that he'd knocked out of Malfoy's hands.
Malfoy nodded uneasily. "I guess so" he said quietly.
Harry nodded and vanished everything with his wand before turning to Malfoy.
"Do you have the heroin?" Harry asked him.
For a second Draco thought about lying, he still felt like he needed it, especially now after such an exhausting night. But he had agreed to this, and he didn't want this, or McLaggen and the others, to control his life anymore.
He put his hand in his pocket and brought out the stash of heroin that McLaggen had sent him, pausing for a second, before steeling himself and holding it all out to Harry.
Harry looked at it for a second. "I think you should flush it all down the toilet" he said. "I think it will be good for you to do it"
Draco looked at him for a second before turning into the stall, emptying the bag into the toilet with shaking hands, while Harry watched over his shoulder, and took a deep breath before flushing it, watching it swirl then disappear.
"Now what?" Draco asked him.
"I think for now we get some sleep, and tomorrow we need to talk, I need to understand everything about this if I'm going to help you" Harry told him.
Draco looked uncomfortable but nodded.
"Would you like to sleep in the room of requirement, or would you prefer your own bed?" Harry asked.
"My own bed" Draco said quickly, not wanting to be trapped in a room with anyone while he was unarmed and vulnerable.
Harry seemed to comprehend, as he nodded and didn't push it, but something dawned on Draco.
"Wait, did you put me in the room of requirement last time? Is that how you knew about... everything, that day in the courtyard?"
"Um, yeah. I found you in the Quidditch stands in the evening and was worried you'd freeze to death so I brought you to the room" Harry ran a hand awkwardly through his hair.
"Oh" Draco struggled to process that. "Okay. Sorry if I said or did anything"
"You did say some stuff" Harry said slowly, deciding how much to tell him. "You actually asked me to be your sponsor, and told me not to let you go home?" He looked at Draco curiously. "What did you mean by that?"
Draco shrugged, doing everything to keep his face neutral. "Must have just been talking rubbish"
Harry felt unsure. "But you did go home for October break?" he asked curiously. "And you come back having been assaulted and about to start taking heroin again after I confiscated your last batch" he told him, eyebrows raised. "Doesn't seem like you were talking rubbish"
"I didn't go home" Draco lied.
"Did you go to your old sponsor?" Harry asked without thinking.
"Excuse me?" Draco felt himself pale, how much had he told Potter than night?
"The one who found you and took you to meetings, the one you slept with for a safe place to sleep and then he stopped helping you" Harry recited what Draco had told him. "Unless you were talking rubbish about that too?" Harry asked him pointedly.
"I -" Draco started, shocked, suddenly feeling exhausted and upset, and not at all mentally ready to accept the damage he'd done by talking to Potter that night, or having to come up with lies now. Why was Potter being so brash?
"I thought you wanted to talk tomorrow?" Draco asked desperately, looking down at the ground, feeling tears sting the backs of his eyes. He was just so drained.
Harry saw the look on Malfoy's face and mentally slapped himself, he went way too hard into this. He had just wanted to wrap his head around everything and he'd somehow already succeeded in hurting the person he was meant to be helping. It was hard to adjust how he was used to speaking to Malfoy.
"Yes, sorry, let's do this tomorrow. We should get some sleep" Harry said contritely. "Let's meet tomorrow at the room of requirement just after lunch. Think "I need a place to talk in private" three times and I'll see you there"
Draco nodded, still looking pained, and walked to the door, not glancing back at Harry as he slipped out and went back to the Slytherin dorms.
He tossed and turned, now feeling panicky. Potter knew too much, he had told him too much when he was too high to control his damned mouth. And Potter wouldn't just blackmail him and mock him like McLaggen and co did. Potter wouldn't rest until he had the truth and had justice. Which meant Draco couldn't tell him the truth.
And did Potter even care about helping him, really? Draco had spilled all that out to him, or more likely had it coaxed out of him, having a drug addiction, having to sleep with someone for a place to stay, having nobody left to help him... And Potter had thrown it against him the first chance he got, threatening Draco with it. What if Draco said or did something wrong again while he was going through withdrawal, which was always when he was his most volatile, would Potter or Granger throw it against him again? Would they tell Weasley?
Draco tossed and turned, winding himself up into a panic.
He needed something to take the edge off and he looked round to the bedside drawer that he had stuffed the Oxy into. No, he couldn't, he had just promised to try his best. But this is better than heroin right? One side argued. But you've been addicted to Oxy before, you know how quickly you can start to rely on it. But it will get you to sleep and then tomorrow you can start afresh, the other side argued back.
Fuck.
Draco reached into the drawer and pulled out two of the pills, swallowing them quickly before he could change his mind, and lying back, letting the calm wash over him and send him to sleep.