CLEVELAND, OHIO
Wolverine is driving the new red Studebaker down the road. The group heres music.
Toad: Sounds like somebody's throwing a party...
Voice: All the little chicks with the crimson lips yell 'Cleveland Rocks! Cleveland Rocks!' Livin' in sin with a safety pin 'cause Cleveland rocks! Louder. Cleveland rocks! Cleveland rocks! Cleveland rocks! Cleveland rocks! Cleveland rocks! CLEVELAND ROCKS!
The groups now sees cheerleaders with torches in hand. People are doing correographed dancing. Wolverine spots a portly man in his mid to late thirties with glasses and a bowling uniform.
Portly Man: OHIO----AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
BOOM, THUMP!
Toad: Looking towards the back of the car. Hey, what was that?
Wolverine: From the looks of it, I'd say that was Drew Carey.
Charles: Or what was once Drew Carey!
SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE OF ILLINOISE
The car is still driving down the road. It's night. Toad looks out the window and sighs miserably.
Blob: What's the matter, Toad?
Toad: Nothing. Still thinking about Wanda again. It's a habit...
Charles: Don't worry. You're sure to find a lovely girl someday!
Wolverine: Laughs. Nice lie, Professor!
Toad burries his head in his hands.
Charles: Internally. It looks like he needs more than a few kind words to help him out.
Toad blacks out. The car is gone and it's only he and Charles.
Charles: Singing. When life gets you down, Mr. Toynbee, and things seem hard or tough. And people are stupid, obnoxious, and daft and you feel like you've had quite enoooooooouuuuuuuuuugh!
Charles jumps out of his seat.
Toad: What the! O.O
Charles is now wearing a very snappy tux with a hat and cain.
Toad: Nice suit...
Charles: You have one too!
Toad looks down. He is also wearing a tux with a hat and cain. He feels the tail of his coat.
Toad: Nice material!
Charles: Talking now. Just remember that you always have friends in us. Though it may not always seem that way, with Logan's contant teasing, we still care about you.
Charles does a few tap dance moves. He motions for Toad to repeat after him. Toad folds his arms and shakes his head. Charles uses his powers to make him do it anyway. Toad taps and spins. The patting of the shoes hitting the floor goes 'clack, clack' all the while.
Charles: Laughing. Lets pick it up!
A set of stairs now appears. Charles and Toad are standing together on the very top. There's a spotlight on them. Toad panics and is about to cover his eyes when Charles stops him.
Charles: You're safe here. No light can damage your eyes.
Toad gives him a funny look and puts his hands down.
Charles: Come on! Lets see what you can do!
Charles tap dances as he descends the stairs. Toad takes a giant hop further down the stairs. Upon landing, Charles takes Toad's hands and they do the Lindy Hop. Just when things seem strange enough, Shirley Temple appears at the top of the stairs.
Charles: Ladies and gentlemen, Miss Shirley Temple!
There is applause in the background.
Shirley, Charles, and Toad: Singing. On the goooood ship Lollipop, it's a sweet trip to the candy shop. Where bon-bons play on the sunny beach of Peppermint Bay!
Shirley disappears and Toad and Charles continued dancing.
Charles: Let the sunshine in, Mr. Toynbee!
The sun appears out of nowhere. There are hippies dancing on each side of the stairways. Everybody puts their hands in the air and sways them back and forth.
Everyone: Singing. Leeeeeeeeeeeeeeet the sunshine in! Leeeeeeeeeeeet the sunshine in! The suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuun shine in! (x3)
The song fades into a montage.
Toad: Still partially asleep. Leeeeeeeeet the sunshine in! Leeeeeeeeeeeeet the sunshine in--
Blob: Toad?
Toad: The suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunshine in!
Blob: Toad!
Toad is startled awake.
Toad: Huh!
Blob: Your eyes were all twitchy and you were singing. What kind of dream did ya have there, pal!
Toad: ..A pleasantly surprising good one...
Wolverine: Was it of Wanda?
Wolverine and Sabertooth laugh.
Toad: No...Suddenly, it doesn't bother me as much that Wanda doesn't like me that way. I forget why I was so upset in the first place.
Charles: Telepathically. Well done, Toad!
Toad: Smiling. Thank you...
Blob: Confused. Who are you talking to?
Toad: Oh...No one... Falls back asleep.
Blob: Are you sure?
Toad: Oh, that I am! Toad winks at the readers.
Blob: What's the matter? Something in your eye?
Toad: A little aggravated. No. Toad is now nice again. 'Night, Blob.
Blob: 'Night, buddy.
Toad and Blob both fall asleep. Meanwhile, on the roof of the car, Charles looks at the readers and winks.