Harry woke up on Sunday morning, not feeling entirely rested after the events of the previous night. He went downstairs and saw with relief that it was only Hermione there, sitting on one of the armchairs. Harry dropped himself down in the sofa opposite her and gave her a tired smile.

She returned it, yawning. "I feel the same"

"I feel like I dreamed it all" Harry said, shaking his head. "Thanks again for helping"

"Oh don't mention it" Hermione said. "I am worried about him though, some of my checking spells showed that he had been dehydrated and malnourished for a number of days and was close to catching hypothermia. I didn't want to stress him out more by mentioning it but the potions I gave him will sort it out" she frowned. "What happened to him that he would be malnourished and catching hypothermia? It's like he'd been sleeping on the streets all week or something!"

Harry remembered what Malfoy had told him when he was high, about running away from home, about being found by his sponsor.

"I think he might have been" Harry sighed and filled her in on what Malfoy had told him at the Quidditch pitch and Room of Requirement.

"That's awful!" Hermione exclaimed, her brows furrowing in concern. "So how are we going to fix this?" she asked. "We don't really know the extent of the drug abuse, or what triggers him needing it, other than sexual assault of course"

"Does there need to be triggers if he's addicted?" Harry asked.

"No" Hermione said thoughtfully. "But the fact you said he had successfully got through withdrawal before makes me think that something has happened for him to get back on it. He obviously wants to stop"

Harry nodded, taking it in, it was a good point, and something he would ask him when they met after lunch.

"I'm going to see him after lunch today to talk about it so I can help him as best as I can" Harry told her.

"Just be gentle with him okay? He's had a rough time of it"

Harry gave a wry smile. "Look at us, concerned about Draco Malfoy of all people"

Malfoy didn't appear at lunch, so Harry headed to the Room of Requirement when he was done to see him there.

He tossed the galleons Hermione had made in his hand as he waited, frowning as the time went on and he didn't show. After half an hour, he dug his map out his bag and said "I solemnly swear I am up to no good" and started scouring the map for Malfoy's dot. Finally he found it, out in the Quidditch stands, alone.

Harry frowned.

"Shit" he mumbled, stuffing the map back in his bag and running down to the Quidditch Pitch, hoping this wasn't a repeat of the last time he found Malfoy there.

He ran into the pitch and looked up at Slytherin, seeing the spot of white-blonde hair, thankfully sitting up but with his head in his hands.

Harry sighed, annoyed that he hadn't bothered to show at the Room of Requirement, and jogged up the steps, walking up to Malfoy and sitting down beside him.

Draco turned slowly, looking Harry up and down, as if confused why he was there.

"Potter?"

"Malfoy"

"What are you doing here?"

"I could ask you the same thing, considering we were supposed to meet over half an hour ago" Harry said, trying not to sound too irritated. He turned to face him and noticed the confusion in Malfoy's face and the lethargic way he moved and tilted his head.

Malfoy looked at him for a minute.

"Shit. I forgot" he said tonelessly.

"Are you on something right now Malfoy?"

There was a pause in which Draco looked down.

"Malfoy! What happened to trying?" Harry exclaimed exasperatedly.

"It won't happen again" he said emotionlessly, closing his eyes against the light. Harry wasn't sure he believed him.

"We were supposed to talk about everything, catch me up on your addiction and how I can help" Harry reminded him. "Can you do that right now?"

"Probably not"

Harry sighed again.

"Fine, after dinner then, room of requirement, be there, or you're going to rehab instead. And bring whatever drugs you have, we're going to get rid of it all" Harry snapped, happy at how contrite Draco looked.

He needs some tough love, Harry thought, rolling his eyes as he walked away.

- 0 -

After dinner, Harry went to the Room of Requirement, walking into the room and glad to see that the Slytherin was already there, lounging one of two comfy armchairs and looking more alert than he was earlier.

Harry walked in and sat down opposite him.

"Okay, are you actually with me this time?" Harry asked him, rolling his eyes.

"Yes" Malfoy said.

"And did you bring your drugs?" Harry asked.

The blonde nodded.

"Okay, show me what you've got" Harry said, deciding that was as good a place to start as any. He should at least know what kind of drugs he was dealing with to learn about them.

Malfoy reached into his bag and pulled out a bag of pills.

"Not heroin?" Harry asked confused.

"We got rid of all that" Malfoy told him quietly.

"What are these?" Harry asked curiously, leaning forward.

"Oxy, they're opiates, powerful painkillers, kind of like morphine" Draco explained.

"Do you take these as well as heroin?"

"I took them to get off the heroin initially, to try and ween off with something less dangerous, but I underestimated how addictive they are" Draco responded, not looking Harry in the eyes.

Harry nodded. "Let's get rid of these" he pointed at the Oxy, and Draco pointed his wand and vanished them, ignoring the tremble in his arm and the voice in his head screaming at him not to do it. At least he still had half of them left in his bedside drawer... Not that he told Potter that.

"Good job" Harry smiled at him and Draco grimaced back.

"Where did you get them from?" Harry asked.

Draco hesitated, thinking for a second. He wasn't ready to tell Potter everything, he still wasn't one hundred percent sure he could trust him, as much as he desperately wanted to. McLaggen was a Gryffindor after all, what if he and Potter bonded over this, held it over Draco together? Draco didn't know if he could cope with Harry Potter turning on him like that, like he almost did that day in the courtyard. Not when he had dreamed of being saved by the Gryffindor for so long.

"I buy them from the Muggle world, they're not that hard to get hold of" Draco shrugged.

"And where does the heroin come from?"

"The same"

"Do you want to talk me through what happened, how this all started?" Harry suggested. But he saw a darkness cloud the grey eyes as he suggested it, dark memories flowing in.

Malfoy leaned back in the armchair, crossing his arms against himself. "Do I have to?" he whispered.

"It's okay" Harry said, remembering what Hermione said about being gentle. "We don't have to talk about that today."

Harry tried again with his questions. "What happened over the October break? Where were you when you were assaulted?"

Something in Draco's face changed, his emotionless mask slid into place and his eyes became vacant.

"I just went out, I don't know who it was, I didn't see them" he said tonelessly.

"He didn't say anything?"

"No" the voice was adamant.

"What's going on at home that you ran away?"

"I told you, I was talking nonsense"

"What makes you want to take drugs? Is there something that triggers you"

"I don't know, I just want to sometimes"

"It seems a bit more than 'sometimes'"

"I don't know what triggers it, if anything" Draco lied, wrapping his arms tighter. Being kicked out onto the streets triggered it, McLaggen and his friends blackmailing him triggered it, his dad using him as a punching bag and dark magic practice triggered it, and being raped by two men definitely triggered it.

Harry sighed and rubbed a hand over his face.

"I don't think you're being honest with me Malfoy" he sighed in exasperation.

The blonde just looked down at his lap, his arms still folded protectively over himself. Harry frowned, Malfoy didn't trust him yet, they weren't ready for this talk.

Harry reached into his pocket and tossed Malfoy one of the galleons.

"You might not be ready to talk about everything" Harry said, leaning forward. "But I meant what I said about helping you, so did Hermione. We're here, so if you feel like you're struggling and you're going to buy or take something. Use this and talk to us okay? Or don't talk, if you don't want. But we can be with you to keep you on track"

Draco nodded, feeling a little bad about not opening up. But he wasn't ready, not yet.

"Okay, let's leave it there for now, but we'll talk tomorrow okay? Same time and place."

- 0 -

Draco headed to the Library for a while just to sit and gather his thoughts, he wasn't ready to talk to anyone just yet and needed a little while to calm down. Potter had a lot of questions, questions he couldn't, or mostly wouldn't, answer. All of this was too much too soon. He so badly wanted to trust him, but he'd trusted people before, and it rarely worked out in his favour. After a couple of hours, he left for the Slytherin Common Room.

As he stepped through the door to Slytherin he was suddenly assaulted with loud music and a lot of drunk teenagers. He looked around and started walking up to Blaise and Theo who were sitting on the sofa taking shots.

"Draco! Join us!" Blaise shouted happily, slightly tipsy.

Draco sat down and took a shot from them, cheers-ing their glasses. He felt wound up and needed to take the edge off. He quickly downed a second one. He couldn't help but feel anxious and jumpy with the drunk people around him, but Blaise and Theo were here and they had never hurt him, he tried to keep telling himself that to calm down, and he edged himself further into the sofa.

"Blaise here was telling me about his new fitness routine" Theo rolled his eyes.

"Listen, mock it all you want, I'm going to get so jacked, and be amazing at Quidditch, and then I'll get signed after school" Blaise told them confidently. "Just you all watch!"

Draco tried to relax and join in. "Blaise, you don't have to lie to us, you just want to get jacked to get the girls" he smirked.

"Oh there it is Blaise" Theo laughed. "The truth of it all"

"Well I mean sure, that's a bonus I guess" Blaise said innocently, holding up his hands in mock surrender.

"Well as much as I love listening to you talk about your rock hard abs" Theo smirked. "I'm going to kick this party up a notch" he said slyly, as he pulled a small bag of white powder out his pocket and shook it. "Either of you boys want to join?"

"Nah man, got my physique to think about" Blaise said, flexing his biceps, distracting himself with his own muscles. At that, Pansy came round and ran her hands up Blaise's biceps, leaning in and giving him a compliment.

"Draco? You in?" Theo asked.

Draco hesitated. He shouldn't, he knew he shouldn't. The last time he did coke... No. That never happened. Come on Draco, get it together, you told Potter you'd try! But now that he saw the drugs there, the idea of calming down enough to be around people and not feel anxious, and to just not give a fuck about anything for a while, was too tempting. He found himself nodding, and followed Theo to the bathroom where they cast a cleaning spell at the counter top and laid out the lines of coke, taking turns to snort up a line each, both swearing as it burned. Draco tilted his head back and let out a moan, closing his eyes as he felt the effect wash over him.

"Fuck, I want to dance!"

"Yes! Let's dance!"

The two boys went out into the party feeling a surge of energy as they danced, with each other, with girls. He and Theo would play fight a little too aggressively, but couldn't stop laughing, spending the night in a haze of chemical energy before finally passing out.

- 0 -

Hermione had gone out on Sunday and picked up a book from a muggle store about the 12-step programme to healing. It would probably have to work a little differently in the wizarding world they decided, but the basic premise would be a good starting point, and hopefully make it more professional and achievable for Malfoy.

Harry had told her about his questioning the other day.

"You went in too hard Harry" Hermione shook her head. "I don't think he's even come to terms with everything that's happened to him, it probably threw him to hear so much of it at once"

"You're right" he sighed. "I just want to get him through it as quickly as possible, and I want to understand it all"

"I know Harry, and what you're doing is great, but he needs to be willing to open up, and the two of you aren't at that level of trust yet"

They talked a little longer until Ron came up and sat down with them and they quickly changed the subject. Harry and Hermione had agreed not to tell Ron, for fear of him using it against Malfoy, so Harry was going to need to come up with an excuse for his disappearances.

All too quickly it was Monday, and they were back to classes.

They were sat in Potions, their last class of the day and Snape had assigned them a partner project to last until Christmas. He read out the list of names he had partnered up.

"...Malfoy and Potter..."

Harry and Draco looked round at each other in shock, and the rest of the class couldn't help but glance over at them both, the notorious rivals.

Though they outwardly faked their eye rolls and disgruntled looks, Harry was secretly glad. This would at least give them a reason to be seen together if they were ever spotted.

They moved to their workstation and as they were given instructions to start the potion, Harry took the opportunity to have a good look at him. He could see that Malfoy looked tired. There were dark circles under his eyes and he was jumpy every time that someone passed behind him.

Harry was chopping up a beetle, something he needed to do in a particular way, and as he noticed Draco flinch slightly again as someone passed him, he cleared his throat.

"Hey Malfoy, I don't think I'm doing these beetles right, can you try it?" he asked casually.

Malfoy looked up at him and understanding, he nodded, walking round to Harry's side of the table which was at the wall where nobody passed. Harry swapped positions with him.

Draco looked down at the beetles and started meticulously cutting them, trying to take his mind off everything else. He had been refusing to think about what happened to him, but the coke had reminded him of that very first night with Mr McLaggen, and coming down now he was feeling jumpy and paranoid, every person behind him making him feel like he was about to be grabbed and thrown to the floor. No! Stop thinking about it, he scolded himself. It didn't happen, none of it happened.

Harry watched him with concern. Itching to be able to read his mind and understand what was going on in there.

Finally, dinner came around, and afterwards he told Ron and Hermione that he was going to the Library to grab a book for his potion.

He went to the room and found Malfoy already there, pacing agitatedly, chewing his nails.

"Hey, are you okay?" Harry said as he shut the door.

Draco looked at him for a second, opening and closing his mouth. He wanted to tell Potter that he had taken coke, that he had messed up again. He felt terrible lying when Potter was giving up his time to help him, but damn it was just so hard to admit his failures. His father had made sure of that.

He made an odd movement with his head, somewhere between a nod and a shake.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Draco struggled. He couldn't decide what to do. Eventually he just shook his head.

"Okay" Harry said. "We don't have to talk about anything today if you don't want, but Hermione did get a book on the twelve steps and I thought this might be a good way to start" he brought the book out.

"I've heard of this at the meetings" Draco admitted.

"Did it help?" Harry asked.

"Well, I mean, I didn't really participate much" Draco pulled a face. "But the others talked about it, they seemed to get something out of it"

Harry thought for a second. "If you didn't do this, how did you get off heroin before?"

Draco ran a hand through his hair, tousling it a little.

"I would either take Oxy instead or sometimes I just tried to quit 'cold turkey' like the muggles would put it" Draco said, leaving out the part where his parents locked him in his room with no access to drugs, or food.

"But it didn't stop you wanting it?"

Draco shrugged tensely.

Harry just nodded, committed to not pushing him too hard this time, and he opened the book, sitting himself down in the armchair to try and make Malfoy more comfortable. The blonde copied him, sitting in the opposite armchair.

"Okay so step one in a twelve step programme is admitting you have an addiction, that you're powerless to it" Harry said, reading from the book. "So... er... I guess you should try saying it out loud?"

"What, just say that?"

"I guess so"

"Sounds a bit too simple to me"

"Try it"

Silence.

Maybe it wasn't so simple, Draco thought.

"Just try saying 'I have a drug addiction'" Harry suggested. "Five words, easy peasy"

"I -" Draco couldn't get the words out. He frowned. "Well, fuck"

"You can do it" Harry coaxed. "It's just you and me, there's no judgement here"

"Right, okay" Draco said, more to himself. "I have... fuck!"

"It's okay, in your own time, whisper it, shout it, whatever you need to do"

"I -"

Harry nodded in encouragement.

"Listing my flaws really doesn't come naturally Potter" Draco sighed, dropping his head into one of his hands.

"I'm well aware of that Malfoy" Harry chuckled, surprising himself. "Okay, what if I cast a silencing bubble on myself and then you can say it and I won't even hear it the first time?"

Malfoy thought for a second, then shrugged. "We can try it"

Harry cast the silencing bubble around his head, and he looked away.

Draco sat still for a second, looking at him, he was giving him total privacy to say or scream the words.

Okay Draco you can do this, he told himself, just say it, it's five stupid words, simple. An idiot could do this. He took a deep breath.

"I-I have a drug addiction" he said, and his voice came out shaky and small. He let out an exhale as he heard himself say the words.

"I have a drug addiction" he said clearer this time. He looked at Harry, who looked at him, unhearing but saw him mouth the words and grinned. He took off the charm.

"Can you do it for me this time?" he asked brightly.

"I -" Draco took a breath and closed his eyes. "I have a drug addiction"

He kept his eyes closed and he started to really hear the words, letting them sink in, and then he couldn't stop, and his guilt spoke for him.

"I have a drug addiction. I'm a drug addict, and I can't stop, I want to stop but I can't make myself stop, and I want them all the time, and I took cocaine last night at a party, even though I told myself not to, and I've felt so guilty about it but I can't stop, I can't stop, I don't know how to." He opened his eyes and found them watering. "I am a drug addict and I am powerless" he finished on a whisper.

He looked up and found Harry looking at him with wide eyes, conflict running through them, and Draco dropped his eyes, guilt consuming him for taking cocaine.

Harry saw the guilt on his face and knew he needed to be careful, he needed to be gentle, Malfoy knew he'd slipped up, Harry could see it was hurting him, there was no point making him feel guiltier.

"I'm proud of you Malfoy" Harry smiled encouragingly. "That was a big step to say all that, to admit to yourself and me. How do you feel?"

Draco glanced up at him before looking away again. "I don't know, part of me feels ashamed, to hear it all laid out. And part of me feels... lighter? But last night I... I just feel so stupid" he rubbed his brow, his face ashamed.

"Don't feel stupid" Harry told him. "This is hard work, and there's going to be temptations, we just need to work through them. We need to find a way to keep you grounded when they turn up. And you need to use the galleon, okay? I know we've never been friends. I know we've gone from zero to one hundred really quickly with this, but I need you to believe that I'm here for you. When someone offers you drugs, when you feel like you need to take them, just push the galleon and send a message and I'll reply okay? Can you do that?"

"I'll try" Draco said weakly.

- 0 -

Two nights later and Draco was yet to use the galleon. He hadn't taken any drugs since his meeting with Potter, but the Oxy stashed in his drawer, disguised in a hollow book, was burning a hole in his mind and he itched to take one each day. Saying the words aloud and admitting what he was had confused him. In a way it had helped, to finally say it out loud, admit there was a problem and changes needed to happen. But on the other hand, it solidified how low he felt, how much of a failure he was, how his father was right about him being a disappointment. He was determined though, not to fail at this, to try as hard as he could. He just needed to get to sleep and then he could make it, the night time was the hardest, when he was left alone with his thoughts, thoughts that couldn't help but wander to events that had happened. To bindings on his wrists, to his clothes being forced off, a hand on the back of his neck... No! That wasn't me! Draco shouted at himself internally. This was his new way of coping, pretend it happened to someone else and move on. He was just so restless, he scratched at his inner elbow, a bad habit he'd picked up when going through heroin withdrawal multiple times, he hung on tightly to his hands so they wouldn't grab a pill of their own accord. He tossed and turned in bed, and tried to think of something else, he tried everything, counting sheep, counting them in French, breathing techniques, the sort that Pansy would talk about that summer she got into yoga, he tried stretching, reciting entire song lyrics in his head, translating them all to French. Eventually he got so agitated that he pointed his wand at himself and shot a stunner, which effectively knocked him out for a little while and must have given his mind the rest it needed to actually fall asleep. All the same, he woke up early, feeling like he'd been hit by the Hogwarts Express.

He and Potter had agreed to meet twice a week so it wouldn't be suspicious, using half of the time to work on the potion and the other half to talk. Their second meeting went well, though as a lot of the 12 steps were relevant to muggles and their worship of God, they had to improvise a little. Hermione had suggested to Harry not sticking with it fully but that for a higher power it could more spiritual or metaphorical.

"I don't get it" Draco said, confused.

"So you just need something greater than yourself to guide you" Harry explained as they sat on their usual armchairs after coming back from the Library. It made Draco feel like they were two different Potter's. School Potter, and Sponsor Potter. He never spoke to School Potter about anything serious, they stuck to talking about the potion.

"Like what?"

"So like Muggles have a god, you could create something, like the version of you that never took drugs, a stronger, more in control version of you. So when you feel any urge to take something, you ask, what would they do?"

Draco thought about it. "Okaaaay, yeah I see what you mean. A better me, the me that I want to be"

"Exactly"

"I'll give it a shot"

The opportunity came up a little faster than anticipated, as on Friday night, as Draco headed to the Prefects' bathroom to take a shower, hoping that the warm water would soothe him to sleep so he wouldn't be tempted by the pills in his drawer, his arm was grabbed and he was hauled into an empty classroom, immediately having his wand taken off him, and he cursed his lack of sleep for his poor reaction time.

He was thrown into the room and he whirled round to see McLaggen and Smith, locking and silencing the door, both turning to smirk at him.

"What the fuck is this?" Draco demanded as they both advanced on him slowly.

"Did you get the gift I sent you?" McLaggen asked, the smirk still playing on his lips.

"Yes" Draco replied, narrowing his eyes.

"And did you like it? I didn't get a thank you" Cormac pulled a mock pout.

"I wouldn't know, I didn't take any" Draco replied coldly.

"Well that's a bit rude, isn't it Zach?"

"It sure is, not the manners I'd expect from a Malfoy" Zacharias Smith shook his head mockingly.

"Well tough luck, I'm not doing it anymore, so take your gifts and fuck off" Draco growled.

McLaggen and Smith shared a look and smirked.

"That's a real shame" McLaggen sighed. "Because we brought some with us and it would be so sad for it to go to waste" and with that Smith reached a hand into his trouser pocket and pulled out a syringe, already filled with heroin.

Draco gulped nervously, already drawn to it, knowing the feeling it would give him to take it. But he needed to do better. The best version of him would say no and walk away, he could do that right? He looked at McLaggen and Smith blocking the door. Maybe not. But he could still say no and get help, all he needed to do was reach into his trouser pocket and push the galleon, and Potter would come, but looking at the heroin, he hesitated, and in that time McLaggen and Smith moved forward, McLaggen grabbing his wrists, and holding them tightly, Smith holding him against the wall.

Flashbacks of bindings, panic, pain all flitted through Draco eyes, and he struggled aggressively against them, as he fought the panic attack that was creeping in from the edges. He couldn't lose it in front of them, he needed to stay calm, and get out of this without making a terrible decision. If he could just get to the galleon. He struggled again, but they held tighter.

"Come on Draco" Cormac whispered in his ear, taking out his wand and binding Draco to the wall around his shoulders, waist and legs. He nodded to Smith and Smith reached into his pocket again, bringing out a collection of photographs.

"We figured since it's been a while since we spoke, that we would all take a little trip down memory lane, of all our favourite times together" Smith smirked broadly, leaning casually against the wall beside Draco and holding out the photos, as McLaggen still held his wrists.

He laughed as he flicked through them. "Oh this has to be my favourite one! This is when you got really high and we dressed you up as a house elf, do you remember that?" Smith laughed cruelly.

McLaggen laughed right along with him. "That's definitely one of my favourites, oh but keep going, I really like the one just coming up, oh there it is! Do you remember when you came crawling to my house in your filthy clothes begging for a place to sleep?" McLaggen pulled a face. "Zach, he stank I tell you. Look at his underwear in that! Have you heard of a toilet Malfoy? It's where normal people go to piss, not in their own clothes."

They both laughed and Draco felt his face burn, his entire body ached from humiliation. He had pretended none of this had happened, tried so hard to wipe it from his memory but seeing it in these photos... he didn't recognise the disgusting person he'd become.

"Oh and that one!" McLaggen continued as Smith kept flicking through, landing on the one of Draco naked in McLaggen's bathroom, cupping himself to try and preserve some dignity. "Can you believe he thought he could seduce my father with that body. It's vile."

Smith gagged with disgust. "Your poor father. I think I would run a mile if someone came on to me looking like that! If I were gay, this would turn me straight. I want to burn my eyes out right now after looking at something so repulsive" he said shuddering dramatically.

Draco felt so low, his father often commented on his pathetic, frail appearance as well, as if the neglect and being locked up in his room and thrown out on the streets were Draco's choice.

Draco fought back tears, nobody would ever want to touch his body again, not willingly or not with good intentions. The only people that touched him now had raped him, that was all his repulsive body was good for.

Cormac leaned into his ear, and whispered. "I can't imagine being you, looking and being this pathetic every day. I feel sorry for you, we all do. Which is why me and Zach here are trying to help you out. Just take a hit Draco, one little bit of heroin and you won't feel this way anymore, you won't care about any of it. Here, I'll even help you" he murmured, and he moved both of Draco's thin wrists to one of his large hands, holding them easily. He unbuckled Draco's belt and pulled it through, rolling up Draco's shirt sleeve and tying it round his bicep. "This is what you want, right Draco? To forget what it's like to be you? Pathetic, repulsive, unwanted."

Draco's heart ached at the words, they were all true, he knew they were, he had been told them his whole life. Why not just stay in a state of bliss, forgetting everything? That sounded perfect to him. He sagged and nodded, tears falling from his eyes.

McLaggen let go of his wrists, still keeping hold of the belt, and Smith put the syringe in his hand. Draco was unaware of both boys smirking as he took it and pushed the needle into his inner elbow and pushed the heroin in.

Immediately, the belt was dropped, he heard "good boy" whispered to him, right before the bindings disappeared and the two boys exited the room. Draco let the needle drop to the floor and he sunk down the wall. What have I done?

With the last few seconds of consciousness he had left, he reached into his pocket and pressed the galleon, right before he slid into a barely-conscious state of bliss.