Chapter Seven
July had flown by in the blink of an eye for Mary as she was now merely days away from her wedding. But as August started and the extreme heat of July, thunderstorms followed them. All through dinner that night, Mary could hear the crashes of thunder outside the house and the flashes of lightning lit the house up even more than the candles and electricity. Once everyone had joined the drawing room, another crash of thunder sounded, causing everyone to jump in fright.
"Goodness. I don't think it's safe for Matthew and Isobel to travel home in this storm." Robert commented.
"It's nice to hear your concern is with them and not your mother." Violet tutted.
"You can stay here, mama. You all can. I can have Carson arrange to send for some clothes first thing in the morning. We should have some spare nightclothes somewhere." Robert stated.
"Thank you, Robert." Matthew said with a smile.
The group continued their game of bridge and conversation. After coffee, Carson announced that the rooms for Violet, Isobel and Matthew were ready, and everyone started saying goodnight and headed up the stairs for bed. Matthew offered Mary his hand and she took it gratefully, walking up the stairs with him until they reached the gallery. They were alone, the lights flickering around them as they stood in the middle of the gallery, both needing to go in opposite directions. Mary felt her heart fluttering in her chest, she wasn't ready to say goodnight yet. She wanted some time alone with her fiancé, they hadn't been able to have much time alone lately.
"It feels strange sleeping here tonight." Matthew commented quietly.
"I hope you don't mind staying here for a short while after the honeymoon, just until we find a place to call our own." Mary said.
"I don't mind. I want this place to be my home, just as it is yours. But I don't think I'll ever get used to taking you to bed with your father present." Matthew admitted.
"Don't worry about Papa. He's so happy we're getting married I doubt he would mind if you carried me up to bed naked." Mary joked.
She gulped as she looked into his eyes, seeing that look of dark desire and a glint of mischief form there as he smirked at her. Matthew stepped closer to her, placing his hands on her waist.
"Careful, I might try it." Matthew said in a whisper.
Mary let out a soft moan as he leaned in and kissed her before he pulled his lips away from her. His hands remained on her waist as they stood together.
"Are you looking forward to the wedding?" Mary asked softly.
"I'm looking forward to all sorts of things." Matthew replied, raising his eyebrows.
"Don't make me blush." Mary smiled.
Matthew smiled, kissing her again before she pulled away and wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in to a tight embrace. She felt him inhale a breath against her neck and gasped in his ear as he kissed her neck. But before she pulled away, she nipped at his earlobe and smirked.
"Come to my room tonight." Mary whispered boldly.
If she were thinking rationally, she never would have invited her fiancé to her room once everyone else in the house was asleep. If she were thinking rationally, she wouldn't be testing his patience or his restraint not to take her right there on the gallery. When she pulled away, she smiled at the way he was biting his lip to supress a groan of need and his eyes flashed a warning at her. That warning that he had given her the day he had proposed.
If you play with fire don't expect me to put it out.
"Goodnight, my darling." Matthew whispered softly.
"Goodnight, Matthew." Mary sighed happily.
Strolling down the hall to her bedroom, she gave him one last smile before closing the door behind her.
Even as Anna helped her dress for bed, she couldn't stop her heart racing. She had teased Matthew, had even invited him to her bedroom like some wanton woman. This wasn't how she was supposed to behave with her fiancé. She had never behaved that way with Richard. Would Matthew find her sinful for inviting him to her room? Would he find her behaviour revolting?
She was quiet as Anna brushed through her hair and braided it. She rose from her vanity and pulled on her robe before bidding Anna goodnight. Pulling back the covers, she climbed into bed and rested back on the pillows and stared up at the ceiling. Her thoughts drifted to Matthew, what he was doing in this moment. Was he thinking about her wantonness just as she was? The longer she and Matthew had officially been engaged, the more comfortable she felt expressing her desires for him. She would kiss him a little longer or a little more eagerly and he would reciprocate. Mary often found that Matthew was more than willing to show her how he felt about her, he would often steal kisses or caresses when there was nobody around and in the last few weeks, he had even been so bold as to tease her first.
There was a quiet knock on her door which brought her out of her thoughts.
"Come in." Mary said quietly.
The door opened and she smiled as Matthew came in, dressed in some spare pyjamas that Carson had found for him, and closed the door quietly behind him. Mary sat up straighter, her hair framing her face as she kicked back the covers. Her heart was pounding so fast that she could have sworn that she could hear it in her ears.
"You wanted to see me, Lady Mary?" Matthew said teasingly.
"I wanted some time alone with you…we haven't had much time to ourselves lately…" Mary muttered.
Matthew cupped her face with his right hand whilst the left ran through her raven hair delicately.
"Your hair is so soft…so lovely…" Matthew whispered.
"Matthew…" Mary whispered back.
Brown eyes met blue. Their gaze locked on the other until Matthew leaned down and claimed her lips. Mary wrapped her arms around his neck and opened her mouth to him, tongues meeting. Matthew lifted her off her feet, his arms moving to her waist, and she broke the kiss, gasping for breath as he moved them to the foot of her bed.
"Is this what you had in mind?" Matthew growled.
"A little," Mary admitted breathily, "I also thought…"
Matthew raised an eyebrow at her.
"I thought…you could just lie next to me…just for a little while…" Mary finished, blushing.
"If you wish, darling." Matthew said softly.
He lifted her on to the bed, with Mary scootching backwards as Matthew climbed on top of her. She ran her hands through his hair, staring deep into those blue pools she had been entranced with for so long. She noted just how soft his blond hair was, the way his eyes lit up as he smiled at her, the wrinkles on his forehead when he did smile. How soft his lips were as her fingers traced them gently until she reached the back of his head and pulled him down to kiss him.
His hands seemed hesitant as they stayed firmly on her waist until Mary shuffled underneath him and freed one leg from her nightgown and wrapped it over his hip, holding him securely to her as they pressed closer. Matthew broke the kiss and groaned, his hands still staying still.
"Mary…we can't…I can't…not yet…" Matthew groaned needily.
"I know…I just…I love you…" Mary whispered.
He placed a soft kiss to her lips before rolling on to his side. Mary turned to face him, her leg moving from his hip as they looked at each other.
"I can't stay for long, darling. I don't want to be caught." Matthew said softly.
"I know. But spending time with you has been limited of late. There are things I wanted to ask without a chaperone around." Mary replied.
"What things?" Matthew asked curiously.
Mary smiled.
"Do you mind…that I'm not…intact?" she said quietly.
Matthew shook his head.
"No. What happened…it's in the past…it doesn't matter to me…when we wed, I will be yours and you will be mine. We'll be living our lives together Mary after so long apart."
"Thank you."
"You don't need to thank me." Matthew assured her.
"How many children have you thought about us having?" Mary asked.
"Children? You would want that so quickly?" Matthew questioned.
"Don't you think we've waited long enough?"
Matthew stared at her lovingly, leaning across to kiss her again but this time he kept it short. He began telling her about the thoughts and dreams he had had over the years of the life they could have built together if he hadn't retracted his proposal. He told her how he pictured her pregnant with his child, something which made her tease him about his male pride to imagine her carrying his child. He told her that he had pictured them having a large family since he had never had one. He told her that he imagined them having four children – a mix of each gender, sons, and daughters. He pictured taking her to Manchester one day to show her all of his favourite childhood spots where he made fond memories with his parents. He pictured them restricting Downton Abbey so that their children could continue the Crawley dynasty. He pictured her in his arms every night before they went to sleep. He pictured the sun bursting through the cracks in the curtains every morning that would shine on her face as he woke to watch her sleeping each morning.
"I've pictured a long and happy life with you, Mary. Now that I have it, it's all I want." Matthew confessed quietly.
Mary gave him one last kiss as she turned so her back was to him and smiled sleepily as he held her in his arms. His head rested on top of hers as he sung a soft tune in her ear.
"I would say such wonderful things to you. There would be such wonderful things to do. If you were the only girl in the world and I were the only boy."
oOo
Robert tossed and turned in his bed, staring around the darkened room trying to make out the furniture. He let out a frustrated huff and turned on to his back when he heard Cora shuffling in her sleep.
"Robert?" his wife asked sleepily.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." Robert sighed.
He heard more shuffling and then a click as Cora switched the lamp on before looking at him through tired eyes.
"What's the matter?" Cora asked softly.
"I can't sleep that's all."
"Is there something bothering you?"
Robert nodded. His mind kept playing through how much worse off the family were going to be now. Since his deal with Carlisle not to publish Mary's story, he had handed over his large stake of investment in the Canadian Grand Trunk Line. His principal investment in trains which Murray had advised him against putting a large sum of money into and now he didn't even own the shares anymore. Sir Richard Carlisle did. And now Downton and all his other holdings were at risk of being lost to the family forever.
But he found that he couldn't keep the information from his wife any longer. So he told Cora everything, from the fight he had walked into between Matthew and Carlisle when Mary had broken the engagement, how he had Sir Richard sign that paper confessing to blackmail in exchange for the shares, how their futures were now uncertain. His wife was shocked.
"Why did you so heavily invest in one enterprise? Wasn't that foolish? Has some of my fortune been lost because of your deal with Sir Richard?" Cora asked quietly.
"Some. Almost all." Robert admitted.
There was a silence as tears filled Robert's eyes. As much as he tried to stop himself from crying, it was impossible. He sobbed as he tried to take a deep breath, the tears fell freely as he felt his wife wrap her arms around him.
"Oh my dear." Cora whispered.
"I don't know what to do, Cora." Robert cried.
"You did what you thought was best for our daughter."
"I made a deal with the devil. All to protect Mary and the cost of that is we lose everything."
"We still have each other, darling. Whatever happens. If we lose Downton and the estate, then we'll be alright." Cora reassured him.
"Thank god for you!" Robert whispered, kissing her forehead.
Cora smiled up at him, wiping away his tears.
"I think we should tell Matthew and Mary; they should be aware of the situation." His wife said quietly.
Robert nodded with a defeated sigh escaping his lips.
"I'll tell them tomorrow. Hopefully we can find some solution whilst they're away on their honeymoon." Robert stated.
Cora nodded and the two of them stayed close together in their bed, not saying anything. The situation they were in was dire and neither wanted to talk about magical solutions or hopes for the future just yet. Whilst Robert knew that his sleep that night still wouldn't come easily, he felt better that he had told his wife what he had done. But he knew that once he told Matthew and Mary the news tomorrow, Mary would be devastated. Matthew would adapt well, if anything, his heir preferred to live a modest life, but Mary was accustomed to something entirely different. Downton was her home, the only home she had ever known, and Robert knew that his daughter would be utterly devastated once she learned the truth.