I remember it was one months later when I began to feel a little strange. I thought it was just lack of sleep from going out to the ravine at all hours of the night. Little did I know it was worse than that. I finally figured it out when I looked at my calendar. I was late. I might be pregnant. Just like my mom was when she was fourteen. I told myself that I would never get pregnant like this. I'm fifteen years old, I can't take care of a baby. My mom did and, well, look how I turned out. Doing dirty things down in the ravine with Jay. It's not my mom's fault though. It's completly mine. Even though I was always safe when I was with Jay. I guess they don't always work. What was the percentage from Friends? They only work 97 of the time. Great. I'm in the very special three percent. Now I have to make sure that I really am pregnant. Then I have to decide what to do. Should I keep the baby? Put it up for adoption? I already know that I can't abort it. I just couldn't do that. It would haunt me for the rest of my life. And I have to decide whether to tell Jay or not. Maybe I should just go away somewhere. Maybe I shouldn't tell Jay that it's his. Maybe I'll pretend I slept around when the only person I slept with and the only person I wanted to sleep with was Jay. Also how do I tell my mom? And Snake? And Manny? And the rest of my friends? Oh God what have I done?
Flashback
Emma: I need somebody to take me to the clinic.
Spike: Are you sick? Do you have a fever?
Emma: I just need to go to the health unit. Tomorrow.
End Flashback
Well I guess I'm going back to the clinic. I should probably go tell my parents. I venture upstairs. "Mom?" I call, "Where are you? Is anyone here?" "Kitchen!" I hear my mom call. I walk slowly into the kitchen. "Where's Dad?" I ask. "He has a meeting at the school today." My mom replied. "Can I talk to you then?" "Of course Emma, let's sit down. Do you want some herbel tea"
I nod yes. It'll probably relax me so I won't be as tense when I tell her.
My mom places a mug in front of me and sits down.
"So what do you want to talk about Em"
I look at her and think back to how her life has been. She had a daughter at fourteen and now that daughter could be having a baby at fifteen.
"Mom? I think I'm pregnant. I'm late. I know it's possible that I could be pregnant so I need to go to the doctors to find out. Will you take me"
My mom sat there for a minute trying to get her thoughts together so she could reply.
"Emma, I got pregnant at fourteen and my mother supported me enough so I could get by and that's what I will do for you. I'll take you to the clinic right now. Just let me grab my purse"
So I guess we are going to find out if I'm pregnant or not. Part of me hopes I'm not. But part of me hopes I am. How did I fall in love with a guy like Jay Hogart? I guess they just have a way of doing that to you. I'll never understand it.