So we're at the clinic. I'm so scared. What am I going to do? I can't do this! I'm not as strong as my mom. I can't handle this waiting. When do I get to see the doctor? When do I get to know? I'm freaking out right now! I can't breathe. I have to get some fresh air. I told my mom I was going outside and would be back in a few minutes and left. Standing outside I took deep breaths trying contol my tears.I finally got myself under control when who should roar by in their orange civic? Of course, my baby's daddy, Jason Hogart. He screeched to a stop, got out of his car, and walked over to her.
"What are you doin' here, Green Peace? I thought you were finished treatment! I thought you were better!"
"I am. I'm here for a different reason"
"What is it? Are you sick? Are you ok?" He asked frantically "I'm fine. Well sort of. I think we should sit down and talk about this
I led him to a bench just inside the door and we both sat down.
"Jay, this is gonna be hard for you to hear and it's even harder for me to say but I might be pregnant. And it's yours. I never slept with anyone else and it's your decison to be are a part of this childs life but I'd really like you to be. Now I have to go to my appointment, excuse me"
After saying all I had to say I started to walk away and go down the hall to the waiting room where my mom sat. Jay was sitting stunned on the bench but he stood up and called after me.
"Em, I want to be part of my childs life. If you'll let me. Just tell me what you want me to do"
I thought about it and decided that he should come to the appointment with me. After I told him that he was silent for a moment and then said that he would come with me. He moved towards me and was about to hug me when my mom came down the hallway and told me that the doctor was ready to do the test. Jay and I walked slowly down the hallway and into the doctor's office.