Twenty-Nine
As Renesmee walked through the clear glass doors at the back of the house she noticed Alec stop his conversation with Jasper and Emmett, to look at her. Her father was there too, standing near the trio, observing silently in the background. Using his mind reading gifts to watch for signs that Alec was somehow untrustworthy.
It made Renesmee shiver, suddenly, watching her father stand with his arms crossed, eyeing a stranger as though he could easily be disposed of. It was so rare for her family to come into any contact with danger, that the sight was unsettling.
As Renesmee made her way down the stairs she watched Alec excuse himself, and stride to her, taking long steps at a slow run until she reached the first level.
"Is everything alright?" He asked.
Renesmee blushed, feeling his strong gaze on her, feeling the concern for her well-being in his tone and the way that his fists were balled at his sides, apprehensive, and somehow protective. "Everything's fine." She didn't know what else to say.
She looked at him, taking his measure. He looked her age, trapped somewhere between twelve and fourteen. His dark hair was falling, unkept, into his eyes, and he had a bridge of freckles across his nose and his cheeks. She wondered how old he was, for instance her grandfather Carlisle was close to four hundred years old, whereas her mother had been human until the moment of Renesmee's birth. She was a hair taller than Alec was, she noticed, as they stood there.
Alec smiled, lazily. He pushed his hands into the pockets of his dark blue jeans. "That's good." He took a step closer to her, almost touching. "Oh," he said distractedly, and then he took a quick step away. "I hadn't realized…"
She watched him recoil, and she immediately felt self-conscience, as though she smelled. Nervously, she tucked her hands into the oversize sleeves of her uncle's old sweater.
"I'm sorry," he raised his hand, excusing himself, taking another step away from her. "It's the blood. I can smell it."
Renesmee covered her mouth with the cloth of her sweater, taking a step away herself. She couldn't taste it anymore, and hadn't realized…
"It's nothing," Alec chocked, his voice raw and thick with a painful cracking dryness. "It's just still so difficult to be around blood. Forgive me."
She watched him retreat fully from her, taking his place back with Emmett and Jasper at a full vampiric run. She felt disgusted with herself, ashamed for her lack of understanding. How could she be so cruel. From the corner of her eye, she could see her father, still standing off to the side, arms crossed, but he was murmuring softly to her mother, who stood just behind him, observing everything herself. Renesmee's neck was peppered in a red flush and she tried to look away so no one could see her face.
"Baby," Bella approached her, she had made it across the yard in a matter of seconds. She heard her mother behind her, but Renesmee blinked several times to clear the tears from her eyes before she turned around. When Renesmee finally did turn to face her mother, she grimaced when Bella too took a harsh step away from her. "Carlisle gave me—"
Bella finished for her, "—The blood. I know."
She could tell that her mother was bracing herself, nonetheless she reached her hand out for her daughter, waiting for her to take it. Finally, still rosy with shame, Renesmee took it.
"Dad's going to sit this one out," Bella told her. "He wants to stay and see what Alec has to say about the Volturi." Bella put her arm around her daughter as they walked to the car. "Emmett and Jasper are training with him."
"What were you and dad talking about before?" It had to have been serious for her mother to have looked like that.
Her mother squeezed her shoulder, comfortingly. "Nothing."
Renesmee knew that was a lie, and Bella seemed to sense that realization as well.
"There was a kidnapping in Volterra recently. A young pregnant woman. Dad just thinks it's odd for something so public as that to happen so close to the Volturi. It could mean something. Something could be happening in Europe that we aren't aware of yet."
"You don't trust Alec." It wasn't a question.
"We don't know Alec," Bella pressed. "We want to trust him. Alice and Carlisle trust him. But we can't ignore where he came from."
In the car, Renesmee took out her cell phone. Jacob hadn't texted her back, but the conversation hadn't really stopped, either. She wanted to tell him that Carlisle had given her a clean bill of health, but had that really happened? She had just guzzled blood from a plastic blood bag. Someone—maybe even someone she knew—had donated that blood. It should have gone to someone who was sick enough to need it. She had enjoyed it, she still remembered the way it tasted going down, and how, now, her entire body felt electrified. She could never tell Jacob any of that, he wouldn't understand. He would be disgusted by it. Even her mother, who Renesmee knew, had never tasted human blood, may not ever truly understand. Rose would, though, she made a quick mental reminder to try and find her aunt later on to talk to her about it.
Bella drove one of the fancier SUV's that the family owned, the same car to Carlisle usually drove to the Forks hospital. Renesmee watched as the lush evergreen forests gave way to the sprawling two lane highways into Forks proper. They passed the café where some of the older high school kids hung out and closer toward her Grandpa's house, she saw Newton's Olympic Outfitters, where she knew her, mother used to work.
Charlie was waiting for them on the rickety front porch when Bella's car pulled up, hugging the curb at the front of the house like her old truck used to. Bella still had it, unable to part with the old clunker, but it was currently collecting dust in a public storage unit in Renesmee's name.
Renesmee waved enthusiastically when her grandfather came into sight. She loved Carlisle, but she and Charlie had always had a special bond.
Charlie waved back, "There's my kiddo!"
Renesmee darted from the passenger seat, phone in hand, bouncing up the curb and the front steps like a little kid again, her limbs long and thin like a giraffe. "Papa!" She greeted, and all too soon their arms were around each other.
"I love the shirt," he told her, pulling her oversize sleeves out so he could view the full designed. "I remember having this same shirt in, what… 1985, I think."
"It's vintage," she explained. She couldn't tell him that her uncle Emmett had once warn it to frat house parties in the eighties.
"Oh right," Charlie's eyebrow furrowed and he scratched his head, "Thrifting right? All the kids are into thrifting, right? Poppin tags, I'm down with it."
Bella chuckled, despite herself, as she shut the driver's side door.
"There's my best girl." Charlie waved Bella forward, and within the blink of an eye Bella had her arms around him. It was a soft embrace to her, but to Charlie it nearly knocked the air out of him. "If you missed me that much," he explained, slightly winded, "You should come and see me more often."
Bella let him go, "I know, dad. I'm sorry."
Charlie was taken aback by Bella's evident heartbreak. "Come on, Bells." He tussled her hair, it always looked too fancy these days. "Football fixes everything."
Bella curled her lip. "I thought baseball fixes everything."
"No way," Renesmee chimed in. "It's hocky, hocky fixes everything."
Sue stepped into the doorway. The porch was already too full for one more body. "Girls, it's basketball, basketball fixes everything."
Charlie rolled his eyes, exaggeratedly, looking beseechingly toward the sky. "How'd I get so lucky to be surrounded by all these beautiful women?"
Sue gripped his arm, squeezing the bicep tightly. "Sheer luck, I guess. Come on in, ladies."
Bella smiled affectionately at Sue, and embraced her, as Renesmee made her way inside. Although Charlie and Sue weren't married, they had been together for more than four years, and Bella had seen the change that Sue had brought about in her father. She was grateful for that, and always would be.
"We're not late, are we?" Bella asked, ushering her father back into the house. She pinpointed the half empty Rainier Beer can on the table next to the door and she plucked it back up for him, handing it over and smiling at his grateful expression.
"Pre-game is just now ending," Sue called from the living room.
"Are we the last one's here?" Bella asked. When she made her way into the hallway, she noticed Leah Clearwater sitting comfortably on the sofa. She stood when Renesmee and Bella entered.
"Hi, Leah!" Renesmee yelled happily. She had not picked up on the tension that Bella could feel wafting off Leah.
Bella would not say that Leah glared at her daughter, but the look that she gave Renesmee was less than friendly, yet still, it was better than most of the wolfpack had given to either herself or her daughter in the last few years.
Bella waved, feeling as awkward as a human girl again. "It's nice to see you, Leah."
"Been a long time," Leah lied, with a sly grin.
Charlie and Sue had taken up their seats on either side of the living room, closest to the television set. Renesmee sat on the floor beside Charlie's chair.
Leah eyed Bella, sensing the vampire's hesitation in the same way that Bella had sensed Leah's hostility upon entering. Leah sat back down on the couch, slowly. Moving lazily and languidly like a cat, stretching in the sun. Bella watched her extend her forearm, theatrically to Bella, indicating that she should take her seat on the other side of the couch, beside her. Bella followed her lead, sitting with one leg under her on the opposite side of the sofa.
The television announcer was starting the lengthy process of explaining the current season standings for the Oregon Ducks, as well as the home team, the Washington Huskies. The group watched, with baited breath, as they began to list the names of the starting players.
"Oh, wait!" Sue exclaimed, startling them. "I almost forgot."
Bella watched as Sue jumped off her chair, scrambling, a bit sloppily, to the kitchen and then return, having retrieved an 8x10 picture frame from the kitchen. "Leah, will you do the honors?"
Bella's eyed widened a bit as Sue handed her daughter the framed picture, and Leah actually smiled, her face looking delightfully young and untroubled. "What is that?" Bella couldn't help but ask, anything that brought such joy to Leah Clearwater had to be understood.
Leah tilted the picture frame in Bella's direction. The photo was an old sepia toned snapshot of Harry Clearwater, looking a decade younger than Bella had ever known him. He was holding what must have been a newborn Seth in his arms, while Leah, in pigtail braids and scraped knees stood at his side, smiling an infectious gap tooth grin. It had been five years since Harry passed, leaving Sue a widow, and Leah and Seth both without a father. Bella suddenly ached for the family anew. Harry had been one of her father's lifelong friends.
Charlie held out his beer can in the photo's direction, and Leah moved it closer for him. Charlie knocked the can against the side of the frame, tilting it up in a toast. "We got this, Harry," he said in a whisper.
"I can believe Seth was so young in that picture," Renesmee said, breaking the tension of the sad moment. "He seems like he's always been a teenager."
Charlie patted her head, "Even you were that young too, Kiddo."
When Seth came on the screen, running full tilt out of Husky Stadium with his long hair fanned out in the wind, everyone went mad. Sue and Charlie yelped and Renesmee squealed. The announcer was commenting that Seth Clearwater was the first indigenous starting player that the collage had ever had, and all eyes were on the young Freshmen to see what he could do. They also saw the obligatory panning of the camera man into the stands, where a handful of boys wore traditional Indian war bonnets with fake feathers, likely picked up from a Party City. There were several girls in the stands with feathers braided into their hair, wearing t-shirts that read "SC" followed by a heart on them.
Leah and Sue gave each other a look.
Leah said, "Must the colonizers do that?"
Sue looked skeptical. "I guess so." She took another long drag from her beer can.
Renesmee had never realized how offensive that kind of thing could be to them.
"I wanted to say thank you," Bella noted, wanting to clear the tension that the room had suddenly changed to.. She spoke low; low enough for Sue and Charlie to not hear, but keen enough for Leah to understand with her supernatural ears.
Leah raised an eyebrow. Remembering the image of Leah's childhood spunk, it made Bella smile. "Thank me for what?"
Bella wrung her hands, suddenly feeling like an awkward human girl again. All of her human memories were strongest when she returned back to the Swan house. "For coming to the compound, the other night." She twisted her fingers inside her palms. "For asking Sam and the others to leave. For talking to Jacob and calming him down."
Leah sat farther back against the sofa cushions. "I don't know what Edward told you, but I did not calm Jacob down." She paused, looking off into the distance, a scowl forming across her face. "What did Edward tell you?"
Bella was taken aback. Edward had been trying to tell her something earlier, something about Leah, but he never finished. Bella shook her head, adding truthfully, "Edward didn't tell me anything."
Leah frowned. Her face transforming into a hard knot.
"No, really," Bella insisted. "He didn't tell me anything. Edward," she struggled, going on, "His abilities, he doesn't have to see a lot. He tries actively to not see."
Leah crossed her arms. To Bella it looked like she was trying to disappear into the couch.
Charlie and Sue both yelped when Seth's team ran for a touchdown. Leah and Bella joined in, halfheartedly.
"Well, you're welcome, I guess. I didn't do much. Just told Jacob to get his head out of his ass and I told Sam to go home to his perfect family."
Bella sighed. It was more than that. She knew it, and she knew Leah knew it too.
Renesmee got up, excusing herself.
"Are you alright, baby?" Bella reached out for her daughters hand, but her fingers only found the soft folds of Emmett's old sweatshirt, bunched up loosely at her daughters' palms. Not even the trace of Renesmee's fingertips could be seen through.
"I'm okay, mom." Renesmee brushed her mother's touch off, retreating behind the couch and heading toward the bathroom. She sighed on the way out, and Bella was left feeling ashamed for her earlier concern. She had always been told that teenagers were difficult, but she never remembered being this dramatic when she was Renesmee's age.
Once in the bathroom, Renesmee gripped her stomach. The lighting in Charlie's bathroom was startlingly good. Perfect ocher light from ten-year-old bulbs. It made everyone who examined their reflection look golden and airbrushed. Perfect for talking selfies, as Renesmee had done, multiple times. Despite the ambiance, looking at herself now, all she could feel was sick. There was a thin layer of sweat pricking her forehead and her cheeks were flushed. She covered her mouth, chocking back a gag.
Her cell phone buzzed, and she pulled it out from her bra strap with shaky fingers. Her breathing was coming hard, as though she had just run a marathon.
It was Jacob, the text read:
So, what's the score? I'm on break, I can chat for a few.
Renesmee put the phone down on the counter, using its surface to hold herself up.
She had waited all day to talk to him, and now... She slammed her palm against her forehead, the contact stung, but she was desperate to knock herself out of this. Whatever this was.
Her cell buzzed again, but she was still breathing heavy, still sweat drenched, and nauseous, she suddenly felt a rush of dampness in her underwear, and her stomach felt like it was curling into a snarled knot. A sound escaped her mouth, but her fingers were automatically there to cover the noise with her fingers. She thought she could hear her mother outside the door, moving from the living room to the kitchen, no doubt searching her out, but she needed to be alone.
Renesmee sank to the bathroom floor. Weightless, until she could put her flushed cheek against the coolness of the bathroom floor. She reached her hand down to her pants. She had worn dark blue jeggings but when she brought her fingers back up, she could see that they were red with blood.
Her cell phone buzzed again. It was still on the countertop where she left it. Closing her eyes, she imagined Jacob's face. This was likely the only time she would get to talk to him today, and he was calling her, on his break from work, while she laid here, on her grandfather's bathroom floor, hyperventilating.
She knew what this was. Carlisle had warned her just a few hours ago. She was going through puberty, and as embarrassed as she was to admit it, she had just gotten her period. No one had told her about how painful it would be, though. No one had mentioned the nausea and the stomach pain.
She stifled another cry, and the mowing stretch of pain griped her insides again.
When someone knocked softly on the door, she covered her face with both hands, still stretched out on the floor like an overgrown baby. The pain had made her curl into a fetal position.
"Hey," it was Leah's voice. "Let me in." Her voice was insistent, though still in a whisper. Renesmee's mother had to have heard something and it was just a matter of time before she came in, babying her, like always.
"I mean it," Lead added, a bit more forcefully. She sounded so close that Renesmee wondered if she had knelt on the other side of the door to whisper through the keyhole on the doorknob.
Renesmee put most of her weight on her hands and sat up against the wall, using her other hand to open the door slowly. It was a tiny bathroom, and her legs were in the way, Leah could only open the door a crack.
Leah could tell instantly from Renesmee's face that something was very wrong. "What is it?"
A tear slid down Renesmee's cheek. "There's blood."
Leah was immediately on edge, but watching Renesmee's face lower, lingering on her upper legs, Leah understood. "Do you have anything?"
Renesmee shook her head, another tear falling.
"Is this your first time?"
Renesmee didn't speak, just nodded.
Leah sighed, her face softening. What were the odds that Renesmee's vampire mother had a tampon with her? What were the odds that Sue had one, either? She pointed a finger in Renesmee's direction. "Don't move."
Leah closed the door softly, leaving the little girl inside, alone. She checked the pockets of her basketball shorts. They were baggy and oversized, she had stolen them from Mike, honestly, but her pockets were empty. She had left her car keys on the table by the front door, and she picked them up, tossing them upward and catching them again out of habit. When she opened the front door her mother yelled, asking where she was going, telling her that it wasn't even halftime yet. Leah told her that she just had to run to her car really quick and she'd be right back.
Out of the corner of her eye she saw Bella strand up from the couch, somehow sensing that something was off. Leah gestured for her to sit back down, and surprisingly, it worked.
Once she was outside, Leah popped the trunk of her car and rummaged through the duffle bag that she always kept back there. She wasn't one to carry a purse and her pockets were strictly for her car keys and phone. She had both pads and tampons there and she grabbed a couple of each.
Stepping back into the house she made her way quickly back to the bathroom where she knocked once more. Renesmee pulled the door open, she was standing now.
"Here," Leah handed her the various items.
Renesmee took them, but after giving them a long-befuddled examination, she looked back to Leah and searched her face.
"Oh," Leah said, understanding now that not only was it Renesmee's first time getting her period, she also had no idea what to do about it. Not surprising, Leah chided herself, she was only four after all. "Okay, we can start with the pad, then."
"Okay," Renesmee sounded even more confused than she looked.
Leah took a deep breath. This was no different than when one of her students was sick with the stomach flu and she had held a dishtowel up to the girls face to catch the vomit while she ushered the little girl toward the bathroom. "Go ahead and sit on the toilet. Pull your pants down."
Renesmee obeyed. Really, the equipment was the same, Leah didn't feel any shame in changing in a locker room, and it seemed like Renesmee didn't either. "Okay," Leah picked up the pad and unwrapped it, pulling the sticky sheet off the bottom. "Just lay this against your underwear. Press it down, so it's secure."
Renesmee obeyed.
"You've been bleeding for a while, it looks like. When you get home, make sure you change your underwear, the pad will stick better to a dry surface."
Renesmee pulled her pants back up, grimacing at the way the pad felt.
Leah couldn't help but smirk. "I know. I hate that feeling. You can try putting a tampon in later, here," she handed out the products to Renesmee again. Suddenly feeling awkward.
On the countertop, Renesmee's phone buzzed again.
Leah raised an eyebrow. "Let me guess, Jacob?"
Renesmee blushed. Leah was standing with her back against the door, eyeing the phone. Renesmee tried to ignore her stare while washing her hands, all the while, her eyes darting to the lock screen on her phone.
When Renesmee turned the water off she heard Leah's phone chirp. "My boyfriend," Leah explained, fingering the screen on her cell and tilting her head as she examined the message. Renesmee watched a tiny secretive smile spread across Leah's face.
"I didn't know you were seeing someone?" She asked, curiously.
Leah appraised her. "His name is Mike," she divulged.
"Is he from the tribe?"
"No," Leah noted, quickly. "He's a townie, from Forks."
"That's really great, Leah." She meant it. Renesmee had always liked Leah. She knew that Jacob liked her, and even though Leah had always had a bit of an attitude, she had always been kind to Renesmee. She knew it wasn't easy for Jacob to break with the pack, or to continue to lead the ramshackle pack of Seth and Leah. She didn't even know if Jacob considered the three of them a pack any longer.
"How are things with Jacob?"
Renesmee blushed again, her cheeks flushing a stinging red. "He's… My friend. We're just friends."
Renesmee's phone buzzed again, the sound was passive-aggressive as Leah studied her. Renesmee had never noticed before how masculine this bathroom was. From the dark wood paneling of the walls, to the emerald green towels beside the sink. Her fingers busied themselves with scratching at the pilled side of the hand towel.
"It can be intense, yeah?" Leah started. "The imprinting, the bond."
Renesmee knew, it wasn't a secret. Jacob had imprinted on her when she was born, as soon as he saw her. He was her friend, and he loved her. He had never hurt her before.
Leah could see that she was floundering. "I'm sorry kid, I just—"
"—I'm not a kid."
Leah backtracked. "Your right, you're a woman now. I'm just saying, I've seen it firsthand. The imprinting, I mean. It can be scary. I'm sure people tell you this all the time, but you're very young. Not just in human years, but normal years as well."
Renesmee pulled a strand of hair under her ear. She could feel her face burning red again. "I didn't know you were imprinted with anyone."
Leah sighed. "I'm not, but I've seen others who were."
Renesmee sensed that there was a whole mountain of baggage when Leah said the word others, but she didn't want to press. "Thank you for helping me."
"You're welcome," she said, truthfully. "Does your stomach hurt?"
It did, and Renesmee lifted her hand up to touch her abdomen reflectively.
"Cramps," Leah nodded. "They suck. That never changes. You can try some Midol, but stuff like that doesn't work on us supernatural girls, at least I've found."
"Supernatural girls?" Renesmee couldn't help but smile.
"Yeah," Leah smiled back. "Wolf girl and vampire girl. I've never known another female supernatural creature, for so long it's just always been me and the boys."
From the living room they could hear Charlie and Sue let out a roar of cheering.
"Huskies are ahead," Leah confided, rolling her eyes at her mother's spectacle. "I think your mom is worried, try not to in here too much longer." Leah turned the doorknob, letting herself out.
"Leah, you're missing it. We just saw Sethi on the television."
"Okay," Leah yelled. She was sympathetic with her mother's excitement.
The doorbell of the Swan house rang.
"Leah, can you see who that is?" Charlie asked. Sue's voice was rising to a higher pitch and so was Charlie's. Neither could tear themselves away from what was happening in the game.
Leah crossed the foyer, it was maybe three steps at most, and opened the front door.
Emily was standing on the other side, and judging from the look on her face she was just as shocked to see Leah greeting her as Leah was to find her standing there.
Leah took a step back, taking in the sight of Emily's obscenely huge abdomen.
"Hey," Emily said with a tiny wave. There was a purple bowl in her hand covered in crinkled tin foil.
"Hi," Leah said.