Title:Guilt
Author:SupernaturalandLostfan
Rating:PG13
Genre:Angst/Drama
Characters:Dean,Sam,Meg (a.k.a.evil bitch), OC's
Spoiler warning:"Scarecrow" I guess since we meet Meg for the first time in that episode.
Summary:A mistake is made. Can one of the brothers forgive the other? If so, can he forgive himself?
Disclaimer:I own nothing "Supernatural" related, yada, yada, etc.
Guilt
Ch.5
Sam sat up in the bed, rubbing his eyes, after being awoken by the sound of someone entering the hotel room.
"Dean?"he asked, into the darkness, not seeing anyone, but hearing loud rapid breathing."What are you doing ? What time is it?"he asked, his voice carrying a bit of anger. He'd been having the rare pleasure of dreamless sleep, and was a little peeved at his brothers thoughtlessness.
Of course Dean didn't answer him,as per norm for him now, and Sam flipped on the bedside lamp with a sigh, seeing Dean was sitting in one of the rooms two chairs, his back to him.
"What? You're not gonna answer me? You know, this is getting really old Dean. The whole me trying to actually talk to my brother and him just ignoring me thing. So, okay. I'll tell you what. You quit coming in at what is it? 3:30 am, and I'll quit asking you why. Is that so much to ask? Now, I'm going to try and go back to sleep now since we have the whole demon killing to attend to tomorrow. So do me a favor and don't make any more noise, okay?"he said, and flipped the light back off, rolling back on his side.
"I saw her."Dean said quietly a moment later.
"What?"Sam asked, rolling over to peer into the darkness in his brothers direction.
"I saw her. Kelly, the girl I shot."
"Ah shit man, did it finally make the news?"Sam asked, sitting up and turning the light on once again."I knew it would sooner or later."
"No, I saw her Sam. Not on the news, face to face."Dean said after a pause.
"How much did you drink tonight Dean?"Sam asked, getting up from his bed and pulling the other chair beside his brother.
"What? What the hell does how much I drank have to do with anything?"Dean asked, going on the defensive.
"All I meant is maybe you just thought you saw her Dean. Drinking does have that effect on people sometimes, and you have to admit you've been doing a lot more of it than usual lately."Sam said, trying to put in in words that wouldn't piss off his easily angered brother."And you have all this guilt over the whole thing too, so its only to be expected that it would eventually materialize in one way or another."
"Yeah Sam, I do have all this guilt over it. I admit that, but I'm not fucking crazy. I know what I saw, and I wasn't drunk for your information. I only had three beers, and believe me, it takes a lot more than that to get me drunk."Dean said heatedly.
"No one is saying you're crazy Dean. All I'm saying is that maybe it's possible that you saw someone else and thought it was her."
"No. It's not possible Sam. I saw Kelly. You think I wouldn't recognize the person I killed? It was her."
"okay Dean, saying by some insane stretch of reality, it was her. What did she want? Did she say anything to you? Or try to communicate in any other form?"Sam asked with a sigh.
"She was in this alley right outside the bar. I heard someone say my name as I passed by it, and looked and it was her. She had my sunglasses, and tried to give them back to me."
"She wanted to give you your sunglasses?"Sam asked incredulously. "That was her purpose for paying you a visit from beyond the grave? Even you have to admit that's totally ridiculous Dean. We've worked on far more than enough cases involving ghosts to know they don't just randomly pop up. They have a reason for doing so, a real reason, not something stupid like that.. Did she say anything else?"
"No, or at least I don't think she did. I didn't exactly stick around to chat."
"Dean, I'm going back to bed now, and I'd suggest you do the same. Like I said earlier, we've got a job to do tomorrow."Sam said, and stood up.
"Why do you find it so hard to believe that I might have actually saw her Sam?"Dean asked angrily, grabbing his brothers arm, pulling him to a halt."When you told me about your "shining" I might have doubted you at first, but I still gave you the benefit of the doubt . Why can't you do the same for me instead of treating me like I'm crazy?"
"I'm not treating you like you're crazy Dean."Sam said, jerking his arm from his grasp,"But you have to admit you haven't been yourself lately, and my "shining" as you call it, didn't start after I accidentally killed someone."
"So you're saying you don't believe me?"
"No, I'm saying I don't believe you saw what you think you saw. Now, goodnight Dean. We'll talk about this again tomorrow when your head has had time to clear some."
"Yeah. Whatever."was all Dean said as he went into the bathroom and closed the door.
So, your own brother doesn't believe you. He thought, looking at his reflection in the mirror.
Mr. Psychic thinks you're crazy. Well, then you're just not going to tell him anything else until you figure this out. Who needs him anyway?
You killed her, and you'll just have to figure out what she wants. Alone.
Dean flipped off the light and went to bed. Not that he got much sleep.
Dean jerked awake the next morning, sensing someone hovering above him, someone other than Sam.
Slowly reaching under his pillow and pulling out the knife he always kept there, he quickly flipped onto his back, grabbing the person by the throat, surprised to hear a feminine gasp of surprise as he did so.
"What are you doing here?"he asked, seeing it was the woman Sam had introduced him to the day before, but even so, he didn't release his hold on her, only loosen it so she could talk.
"Whoa tiger. I was just picking up your blanket that fell off."she answered, trying to move his hands.
"That's not what I asked you. Why are you in my room?"he repeated menacingly. He couldn't explain it, but he didn't trust her for some reason.
"Holy shit Dean! What the hell are you doing? Let her go now!"Sam exclaimed, coming out of the bathroom , seeing his brother with his hand around Meg's neck, and running over and pulling her away after Dean released her.
"You okay?"he asked, examining her neck."He didn't hurt you did he?"he said, throwing an accusatory glare at Dean.
"No. I'm fine."she replied with a chuckle, knocking his hand away."But I'll tell you what, I'm gonna go wait outside just in case killer over there decides he wants to choke somebody again. Oh, and by the way, nice knife"she added, directing the last words to Dean, and winked at him when Sam turned his back to her
Dean sat up, throwing his legs off the side of the bed, and glared.
"I'll be right there."Sam told her, and she nodded, then walked outside.
"What the hell is wrong with you Dean? You could have killed her. How you gone totally insane?"
"Sam, I woke up with a person I didn't recognize standing over my bed, and I reacted out of reflex."
"Well you need to work on controlling those reflexes before you end up killing somebody else."Sam said angrily.
"Before I kill somebody else, huh? Not 2 weeks ago you were constantly saying that you knew it was an accident, that you believed I could never hurt an innocent person, and now you're saying I need to be careful not to kill somebody else. I would have reacted the exact same way just then, even if I'd never shot Kelly. You know that Sam. So why would you say something like that?"
"Whatever Dean. I'm sorry alright, but you just need to get over this shit. What would dad think if he knew what you accidentally did and how you're acting now because of it?"
"Just go the fuck on Sam. Your girlfriends waiting on you remember? Don't wanna keep her waiting too long do you?"
"She's not my girlfriend you asshole. She's just a friend, and she couldn't have come at a better time, because with you acting how you are now, I sure need somebody to talk to. I'm gone, but I'll be back in a couple hours so we can go take care of business."and saying this, Sam left the room, joining Meg outside and throwing an arm around her as they walked down to the parking lot.
Dean sighed and turned on the Tv, putting it on the news as he did everyday.
Maybe his brother was right. Maybe he was going crazy, and imagining things.
He settled back in his chair, and watched TV until his brother returned around 6 pm.
Wordlessly he turned it off, put his coat on, followed Sam outside, and started the car.
Time to kick some demon ass, and if anything could lighten his mood it was that.
TBC
Not a lot of action this chapter,and definitely not one of my best,but there's plenty to come next chapter. I'm just trying to build a foundation for whats to come later on.
Coming up: The demon killing doesn't go as planned, and Meg plays around with Deans mind again.