Winter had finally ended and for the first time since the hot sun decided to awaken Meredith was outside enjoying the fresh air in one of the rare periods she got a break from work. Meredith wandered outside hearing the sound of her shoes making contact with the pavement until her daydreaming ended and she felt herself wandering into a trance as she came within three feet of the hospital garden. Meredith watched Derek working away she flashed Derek a wide smile and felt a twinge of disappointment when she realised Derek hadn't seen her, Derek was to busy shovelling away in the soil.

"Well" a drowing voice behind Meredith interrupted her peaceful state of mind, "in life there are winners and there are losers." Meredith felt a twinge of anger and turned around to see Alex smugly smiling at him, "excuse me."

"Take us we have cash to burn, we have good jobs and we're doing something worthwhile and then we have" Alex flashed a hand towards Derek's direction, "well this that slaves away day in day out and can't even afford a babysitter to mind his little brat."

"That this your referring to is a friend of mine and his daughter is..." Meredith was about to say something else but stopped herself, Alex was a colleague it was unprofessional of her to insult him she instead turned on her heel and walked over to Derek who looked up when he heard the sound of beautiful whistling, "hey spare five minutes."

"I" Derek gasped as he continued to shovel, "sorry um just need to-"

"Derek" Meredith took his shovel in her hands, "you look exhausted, take a breather have a drink."

"Can't stop I" Meredith put a hand on his back as Derek breathed hard, "Derek relax." Derek took another breath and fell forward onto the dirt.

"Derek" Meredith gasped as she bent down and rolled him on his side as she checked her vital signs with her fingers, "Derek."

A while later

Derek opened his eyes feeling heavy in the head and almost paralysed in the body, he rubbed his hair with his hand checking to see if his head was still intact, he couldn't remember the last time he felt this exhausted he tried to get up and groaned as a door opened and he saw a familiar face staring back at him, "well you've been through the wars."

Derek nodded in agreement as Meredith came over with her clipboard, "I just felt so heavy in the head and then next thing I knew I collapsed."

Meredith gave Derek a disapproving look, "you should be more careful Derek you have a child at home."

"What time is it?"

"Its noon."

"How long will I be here for?"

"As long as it takes for you to get better."

Derek collapsed back on to the pillow, "Meredith could you give me an estimate."

Meredith closed the curtains shutting out the sun, "you'll be staying overnight."

Derek pushed himself back up with his elbows, "I can't stay here overnight."

"Well Derek you are."

"Meredith i'm fine" Derek got out of bed and strained his body to stand up, "see i'm okay."

Meredith gave Derek her stubborn patient expression and shook her head, "Derek if you actually believe your fine then your worst than I thought."

"Meredith I can't leave Ally at the school."

Meredith gently pushed Derek back into bed, "you don't need to worry about Ally i'm taking care of it."

"You... huh?"

"My housekeeper Cristina is taking Ally to my house and Ally is going to stay the night."

"No no" Derek pushed in vain against Meredith's gentile hands on his chest, "hang on."

"I've already called the school" Meredith said in a soft gentile effective for a doctor voice, "and it has been arranged."

"You can't do that i'm the parent."

"I'm a doctor, and I told them you were unable to talk."

Derek looked around him, "give me a phone."

"Derek your not ringing the school and your phone will be in reception for you to pick up when you are discharged tomorrow."

"Meredith" Derek said as he started to feel irritated, "look i'm Ally's parent and i'm going to pick her up, take her home and-"

"No your not" Meredith said firmly, "i'm bringing in Ally tomorrow morning before school starts you can take her to school then."

"Do I have any say in this?"

"Of course you do just as long as you stay here."

"Am I a patient or a prisoner?"

"You are someone that just needs to relax and let me do my job."

"Meredith."

"Derek" Meredith made a note on her clipboard, "I can get someone to sedate you at the click of my fingers."

Derek sighed as he felt his body giving in, "you might as well tie me down and gag me."

Meredith giggled as Derek crossed his eyes, "this is not funny."

"Its funny for me" Meredith patted Derek's shoulder before she headed for the door, "now just relax and i'll be back soon."

"Are you going to lock me in?"

"No" Meredith said as she turned her head and grinned, "I would miss the chance to watch you trying to escape and our staff pulling you back here and then sedating you."

"Do you treat all your patients like this?"

"Just the special cases" Meredith walked out giggling she couldn't help herself she felt like the cat who had gotten the cream she was spending her day looking after Derek while getting on his nerves, it gave her a thrilling exciting feeling.

"Someone's in a good mood."

Meredith nodded in Callie and Arizona's direction, "I heard a saying can't remember where exactly that it feels good to be bad."

"What are you up to" Arizona said as she smirked.

"Well" Meredith whispered as she smirked, "i'm having fun with a patient that needs to stay here and Noah is finally going to have a sleepover with a friend."

Arizona exchanged a confused look with her wife, "that sounds like we're missing a few key points."

"My friend Derek he collapsed while he was working, he's in hospital until tomorrow his daughter is coming over to my house and having a sleepover with Noah."

"Right" Callie smiled with Arizona, "and this friend where did you meet him."

"In the park he's the gardener here."

Arizona raised her eyebrows, "wait is he the guy who brought his kid to work the other day to dig holes with him."

Meredith furrowed her eyebrows, "is he that famous?"

Callie breathed a big burst of air between her lips, "the mothers were talking about him all the way through lunch that day saying things like we should call social services, a man is getting his kids to do his job or kids shouldn't be out there doing hard labour."

Meredith felt a brief flutter of annoyance it wasn't like Derek had many options for getting help to look after Ally, "well they need to get their story straight all she was doing was putting seeds in the dirt, he has a hard time finding a babysitter he can afford and I don't think he has anyone else helping him look after his daughter."

"Ah" Callie said as she grinned, "so that means he's single."

"I guess" Meredith replied.

Arizona nodded, "well go get him."

Meredith's eyes quickly blinked, "what do you mean go get him?"

"You'll find out" Callie said with a sly wink, "we better get back to work."

Meredith opened her mouth to say something but stopped as her friends walked away, do they think i'm going to am I no I she wrestled with her thoughts for a moment and then pushed them away, she was at work and she had a job to do it made no sense to be flirting with patients it wasn't professional. Meredith walked back to where Derek was waiting and opened the door to find Derek flicking through television channels, "so your still here."

"Yeah" Derek muttered as he sat up in the bed, "look I shouldn't have gone all crazy before and I do appreciate you looking after Ally."

"Its my pleasure" Meredith sat on the bed, "it will make Noah's day to have a friend sleeping over he hasn't had that before."

Derek chuckled, "so this was all a plot to get Noah a playdate."

"Well" Meredith smirked slyly, "its part of the plot and you need some rest."

"We could have called each other and arranged it."

"We don't have each others numbers."

"Well" Derek casually muttered, "if you don't mind me calling you every time Ally has a cold."

"I'll give you my number before you leave" Meredith stared into Derek's bright eyes, "it would make Noah very happy to have a friend to play with on the weekends."

Derek's relaxed expression changed to one of sympathy, "he doesn't get to do that very much does he."

"No its my fault."

"Meredith why do you think its your fault?"

"Because i'm not there for him" Meredith whispered as she lowered her gaze, "I work all the time, I don't spend enough time with him I don't try hard enough to get him to make friends. Cristina is more of a mother to him than I am."

"You ever tried to cut back on work?"

"Its just so many people here relay on me."

"Noah does to" Derek said in a soft voice, "and I bet he's the only person who loves you for what you do for him."

"Derek" Meredith said as she felt her inner frustrations rising to the surface, "its just not that easy I can't throw away my career and-"

"I'm not saying that" Derek said as he put his hand on Meredith's knuckles, "its just wouldn't you love to just pick Noah up from his school every day and take him to do things like play soccer and you could help out with the other mothers, cutting up oranges and chatting with other mums and cheering your son on."

Meredith giggled as she imagined it, "funny enough I would love to do that."

"Then i'm sure there's a way you can do that."

Meredith eyes stared straight into Derek's eyes, "I envy you."

"Envy me?"

"You live a life that I would like, a life where your child is your whole world."

"Its not that great" Derek muttered, "every time I take Ally out I get looks from parents when they see the state of Ally's clothes. I can never take Ally on special trips or buy her new things unless I save up over a couple of months and I wish I could do those things for her more often."

"Does Ally ever complain?"

"No she never complains, and that worries me when she becomes a teenager if she is someone who doesn't complain about the lack of money she has it could make her an outcast."

Meredith nodded, "I guess we both got our problems."

"Yeah we do so, how do we resolve them?"

"Well" Meredith edged closer to Derek on the bed, "we've talked how I can fix my problems how about you."

"Well.."

"Do you ever think about going to college getting a degree and applying for a job that well..."

"I did go to college for a bit" Derek smiled sadly as he remembered the experience, "but my partner at the time she was studying full time and I postponed my studies so I could support her with college fees and food and I worked full time gardening to do that."

"That doesn't suprise me" Meredith whispered with a smile, "you being there for someone else."

"Then we broke up" Derek continued, "and I went back studying but I couldn't concentrate and I droped out."

Meredith's eyes flashed with pity and anger, "the memories held you back."

"Every time I went to college it just reminded me of Addison and-"

"Derek" Meredith whispered as she now held Derek's hand firmly in her own.

"We broke up, because Addison told me she couldn't be with someone as lower class as me."

"Sorry."

"Yeah" Derek said as he shrugged, "well I just took up gardening that was my favourite thing to do in the world. I didn't want to do anything else or go to college again, eight years later I met Ally and you know what happened next."

"That's a tough story."

"Yeah but there's no point dwelling on it, I didn't have much to live for until I met Ally and she made my life and everything I do worthwhile."

Meredith felt a buzzing sound and she groaned, "dam my pager."

"Bugger" Derek muttered, "I guess i'll see you tomorrow with Ally."

"You will" Meredith closed the curtains, "and get some sleep no sneaking off and if you need anything use the buzzer."

"Okay" Derek settled down, I hope there's something decent on the telly."

Later that night

Meredith unlocked her front door and was greeted by Cristina wearing an apron and a cheery smile, "hey there's the woman of the house."

"Hi" Meredith said as she hanged up he coat, "thanks again Cristina for picking up Ally."

"That was easy, the hard part was explaining to her why her daddy wasn't getting her and then trying to calm her down once she started crying."

Meredith smiled feeling a pang of guilt, "i'm giving you a raise this week you deserve it."

"Its alright" Cristina said with a smile, "Ally is a gem and Noah has been having the time of his life."

"Where are they now?" Meredith said before she heard a loud squel and then the sound of footsteps. Meredith looked up to the balcony and saw Ally running past with Noah.

Cristina let out a chuckle, "they're playing a combination of hide and seek slash chasings slash run around and go crazy."

"I won't ruin the fun then" Meredith smiled widely knowing that she had made things better for Noah in his little world, "the dinner smells great."

A half hour later Meredith walked upstairs opened her son's bedroom and was greeted by her little boy jumping into her arms, "hi mommy."

"Hey trooper having fun."

Noah hugged Meredith tightly, "so much fun."

"Then you must be hungry" Meredith whispered as Ally stood up from a game of snakes and ladders and wandered over to Meredith, "hi sweetie."

"Hi Meredith" Ally said as she waved at her.

Meredith looked at Ally, "can we play after dinner mommy."

"Noah it will be bedtime after dinner."

"Oh" Noah whispered. Meredith kissed his cheek, "since you have a friend over you and Ally can watch television after dinner for half an hour as a special treat."

"Okay" Noah said as a smile appeared back on his face.

"Ally you ready for dinner."

"Yeah" Ally said, "come on Noah race you."

Later that night Meredith was sitting on the couch until he noticed Noah falling asleep on her lap and Ally yawning beside her, "okay Ally i'm going to take Noah to bed."

Ally yawned again, "goodnight."

"Goodnight" Noah mumbled without opening his eyes as Meredith picked her son up and carried him upstairs before tucking her child in. Meredith kissed his small cheek, "I love you Noah Grey."

Meredith came downstairs and saw Ally staring out the window at the night sky, "Ally sweetie its time for bed."

Ally turned around and stared up at Meredith as if she was searching for answers in Meredith's face, "is daddy okay?"

Meredith smiled as she bended down to Ally's height, "Ally sweetheart your daddy is just fine I saw him at the hospital today he's just fine."

"He's in hospital" Ally whispered with scared eyes.

"Ally your daddy was just working very hard and he got tired he's in hospital to sleep."

"He's tired?"

"He was working very hard on a garden and he got tired that's all."

"Oh" Ally whispered.

Meredith's hand rubbed Ally's little shoulder, "he'll be right as rain."

"That's good."

"Now we have a big day tomorrow so I think you should be in bed."

"Okay" Ally jumped on the couch and snuggled in, "goodnight Meredith."

Meredith chuckled, "honey the bed is in that room."

"Where" Ally said as she looked around.

"Come with me" Meredith said as she reached out a hand for Ally to take, she walked into the guest room and grinned as she saw the look on Ally's face, "wow."

"You like it" Meredith said softly.

"Its so big."

"This is a grownups bed, but I think it will be alright for you tonight."

Ally looked up at Meredith, "Meredith."

"Yes dear?"

"What jobs are there to do tomorrow."

"Jobs?"

"At sleepovers with friends I do jobs it's a rule."

Meredith was about to say you don't need to do any jobs then she remembered everything Derek had told her about his daughter Ally liked to help and didn't take no for an answer, "well if you want to help make breakfast tomorrow."

"Yes please."

"Then that would be lovely" Meredith said as she pulled back the covers and let the girl climb into the bed, "i'll leave the light on in the hallway."

"Meredith."

"Yes honey?"

"Thank you for looking after me."

Meredith smiled again, "it was my pleasure." Ally hopped out of bed and gave Meredith a hug. Meredith held the child back tightly and felt tears in her eyes as memoires bloomed in her mind, "Meredith" Ally whispered as she put her tiny palms on Meredith's cheeks, "are you crying?"

"I'm... no honey i'm just" Meredith blinked back tears and picked the girl up making swooshing noises as she popped Ally in the bed while the little girl laughed, "goodnight Amber."

Ally's eyes blinked, "who's Amber?"

Meredith opened her mouth in a stunned expression, "sorry I um."

Ally smiled, "i'm Ally silly."

"Yeah" Meredith whispered, "of course you are... goodnight Ally." Meredith watched the little girl snuggle down and she quickly walked out the door and breathed heavily as her past filled her head.

Two years ago

"Daddy" a voice said, "its time to wake up."

"Yeah" Finn yawned as he looked at the sunrise, "wow its early."

Amber jumped on to the bed, "it needs to be early."

"Yeah your right its a long drive to the mountains." Finn rose from the bed, "i'm going to get dressed say goodbye to your mom."

Meredith rolled over in her sleep and quietly mumbled, "honey give me a kiss goodbye."

Finn smiled and kissed Meredith's lips, "don't work to hard."

"I'll try not to" Meredith whispered as her eyes fluttered.

"Mommy" Amber muttered as her little hands pulled on Meredith's shoulders, "can't you come with us."

Meredith reached out a hand and gently stroked the brown curls from Ally's face, "sweetheart you know I have to work."

"You never go walking with us."

"I know, next time I will come walking with you I promise."

"Pinky promise" Amber whispered as she held out her pinky to Meredith who entwined her pinky finger with her daughter's, "pinky promise."

Amber kissed Meredith's forehead and hopped off the bed letting Meredith close her eyes and start giggling as small fingers started tickling her bare feet. Meredith laughed and reached to pick up Amber, "before you go walking its time for...the tickle monster." Amber laughed loudly as she wriggled in Meredith's arms, "tickle monster."

"Daddy" Amber wriggled, "tickle monster has got me."

"Daddy isn't here to save you" Meredith said in a deep voice as her hands tickled Amber's belly and knees, "from the hugs and kisses monster" Meredith kissed Ally's cheek, "have fun Amber."

Amber grinned as she rolled over and hugged Meredith, "love you hugs and kisses monster."

"And I love you so much."

"Meredith" Meredith opened her eyes and tried very hard not to cry as Cristina came walking to her carrying a dishcloth, "hey Cristina you should head home i'll clean up."

Cristina's eyes saddened seeing Meredith trying to compose herself, "are you feeling okay?"

"I'm just having a moment."

"Well, are you sure you don't want me to stay?"

"Its okay" Meredith whispered as she walked to the kitchen hurried to put everything in the dishwater and went upstairs. That night she cried for hours in her bed and wished with all her heart that she could turn back time.