Kazer Dragon: I know stealing is bad but you come up with a 44-chapter long fan fiction in under a year! Sorry now for something new…
Things you don't expect to see on InuyashaLL: The daily life of Leanne
"It's time for the BRAND NEW TV show that answers all your questions! Its Time For…LEARNING WITH LEANNE!" Announcer.
clap clap clap cheers
A screen opens up in a library lit with candle light. In a big chair sits Leanne with a chocolate brown robe and with a glass of wine appears. She looks classy, cool and dare I say it sexy.
"Dear readers today I will answer a question you've all wondered. WHERE DA HELL DOES SHE COME UP WITH THESE IDEA'S!" Leanne yells. "Now today, I will explain in detail what she does everyday!"
"So now would be a good time to turn this off before it melts your brain!" Dave the announcer says.
"Announcer…" Leanne starts.
"Yeah?" Dave asks.
"You make my stomach churn with either desire or hate. Either way, stop it. Now then time for a day in the life…
A day in the life of Leanne.
Leanne wakes up at around 9-10 am depending on how sleepy she is cause she molests sheep all night. She loves to do it barn yard style YE HAW!
Anyway Leanne lies in bed for a little bit thinking. "God this bed, its soo soft and warm. I just wanna lie here and get it on with myself. But I don't wanna get the sheets wet…"
She then gets up, yawns, scratches her butt, looks out the window at the farm she lives on in the middle of no where and curses that there is no good video game stores for miles and she has dial up internet connection, Scratches her butt again and looks in the mirror to get ready for the day.
What does Leanne think while looking at her naked, hot body? Well one, she's not a small girl she's about 130 pounds and only 5"5 so she says her body is aerodynamically curvaceous. Which it is, if you saw her you'd cream your jeans. Leanne then get's her broadsword and practices cutting and gutting guys with stuffed animals. Of course while being naked…Well she doesn't do this yet, but when she gets a broadsword, she plans to do this in a open window next to the street in Toronto with life sized dolls (Or blow up ones.). Now then what was I talking about…oh right! People think Leanne's boobs are huge but FOR JESUS CHIRST ON A STICK THEY ARE ONLY C CUPS! Man I like talking about me being naked…
MOVING ON BEFORE YOU THROW UP. Leanne dresses in comfy loose baggy clothes cause she's too lazy to put on something hanging up in her closet. She exits her room (Which is next to her parents room, often she'll here the bed creaking if you know what I mean). She says hi to her parents who are watching TV.
She then goes to the one and only bathroom in the house hoping her brother or her dad hasn't made a bomb in the last 40 minutes and goes 1 or 2. Its really relaxing, I should make a therapy where you go to the bathroom it's so peaceful expelling the wastes from your large intestine and bladder.
Then Leanne brushes her F-ed up teeth and makes them all shiny…Leanne likes shiny things like knives or sparkles. And depending on how much time (Or if she's on her rag) takes a shower. And touches her naked body all over and………. Well not really, more like wash hair, soap, rinse and get out. But it's really hot. The water I mean I turn it up way to high.
Leanne then brushes her hair but gives up when she realizes that the damn knots are not coming out without some sort of plutonium brush that would totally burn them off. Then she goes out and watches Ellen TV show that is on at 10 am on some crappy A channel in Canada. Then she eats a healthy breakfast of crack, vodka, and horseshit called oatmeal. She then watches Price is Right. She then yell at the TV with her mother and father. "70 000 for a truck you're a god damn moron!" or a classic. "STUPID OLD PEOPLE WALK FASTER!"
Anyway after it's over Leanne goes into her room to start thinking of funny things. She turns on the radio and begins thinking of idea's. Like what if Inuyasha had his own Olympics…say that's not a bad idea. Anyway Leanne thinks of one idea like a few things for this chapter and then thinks of another idea then fuses them together to get a chapter idea started. Then Leanne play's in her room….plays video games that is! Hahahhahahah...god I'm lonely.
So then Leanne reads, that's right she reads books! Not porno who said anything about Leanne reading Porno? Right now she's read Anne McCaffery's dragon riders books. That's about it, I could say more but you'd scream out in fear if I told you what I do when I read books. Wink wink imagination you're my best friend.
Leanne then goes on the net where she begins, works on or does naughty things to fan fictions. By this I mean make her own. Now this is where the magic happens Leanne gets a snack and a glass of chocolate milk, or hot chocolate and begins to type. When she gets bored she goes on MSN and looks at web comics (Nuklear power! YAY!). This is why Fan fiction's take so long to post cause Leanne's a lazy bitch who slacks off all the time.
Leanne answers her fan mail at this time. Yes Leanne gets Fan mail. Like:
Dear Leanne:
This is Jebus, I know you and I had a rocking good time in Mexico the other night with the sex midget Pepito. But Jesus felt leave out when we gave him that fat Jew guy I think we scared him more than when they put nails through his hands. Anyway Lets have a three some with him next time. I'll get him to make your menstrual blood cool aid. Peace out! Jebus, Jesus's long lost Italian cousin. P.S Tell Pepito to stop humming so much! He's like a horny lap dog!
She also looks on the job bank to see if there are any jobs in her local area. But she realizes that she's put her name in to all those places, curses then and hope they fall flat on there face then play ripped off ROMs!
At about 5 pm this ends and Leanne makes supper cause her mom isn't normally home so it contains TV dinner's or frozen pies! She watches TV and then goes to play video games most of the night… And thus Leanne ends her day.
"The end of this crazy bitches life what do you think Announcer?" Leanne asks.
Dave is trying to hang himself. "I fear death only slightly more than I hate my life…Any and all complaints should be addressed to reviews. We do not take responsibility if your brain melts, smokes, fries, does not work, you become insane, don't undestand homework or classwork or you suddenly use words you don't know, Nightmares, daydream nightmares, Omniloathe, kill people, kill unborn people, take drugs, drink alcohol, drink Iodine, or any other substance, eat baby brains, eat a banana in an sexual manner, doing things evolving razor blades, listen to Rippy the Razor or Beater the razor tipped electric rake that sets people on fire, watch dirty things on the internet, watch your girlfriend or boyfriend so dirty things, rape people, make boobs bleed, flash people. Periods, wet dreams, read dirty things, play dirty video games or anything dirty in general, kill black people, kill white people, kill innocent in anyway, Hitler, Nazi, god, Devil, Death, Leanne, Drunken sex, weird people, sex with dogs, cats, sheep, cows, chickens or any other animal and anything else crazy you might do we haven't mentioned! We will take responsibility if we made you laugh and or scared! Thanks for watching and see us next time please send those questions!" Takes a deep breath. "This is Dave the Announcer and good sanity!" He tries to jump but the rope breaks.
Kazer Dragon: Yeah that's my life in a nutshell. I might use that Olympic idea. I hope you had fun laughing at my pitiful existence…