White Clouds
Tenebrous Skies
15th day of the Guardian Moon of the Imperial Year 1180
"Still nothing, huh?" Felix said with a huff, in his eyes was an expectant look, a look that he was anticipating disappointment upon his arrival to the Black Eagles classroom.
Annette shook her head as she met Felix at the doorway to the classroom, having just arrived at the classroom minutes ago, followed by Felix.
"He usually comes as soon as it's class time…" Annette muttered.
Felix scoffed, looking annoyed at the absence of one professor ever since the month of the Guardian Moon began.
"How long is he going to mope around?" Felix grumbled, his face contorted with annoyance. "He's acting like he's the only one affected by all this."
"Felix! His father just got buried recently! You can't expect him to just go up and act like everything's fine! Be more considerate!" Annette chided the Fraldarius heir. "What would you feel if you were in his situation? If your father died in the line of duty?"
"I would have said he died like a true knight." Felix scoffed hatefully as he remembered a very bitter memory in his past before turning his back away from Annette and started leaving the classroom.
"Felix! Where are you going?!"
"I'm going to train."
"But Seteth will soon come to teach in the professor's pla-"
"I don't care, I'd rather train if the professor isn't here."
"Fine! Be stubborn then!" Annette exclaimed but Felix simply left her without another word much to her irritation towards him. "Don't come to me asking to lend you notes!"
Felix dismissively waved his left hand as he left, not bothering to look at Annette on his way to the training grounds to cut his classes for the nth time so he could train himself with his swordsmanship.
Annette huffed at the man who was her dance partner at the ball, an experience that she thought felt like a dream and especially the fact that Annette kissed him on the cheek-
She shook her head, wanting to forget such thoughts. Annette didn't want to daydream too much on good memories considering the recent events that had befallen Garreg Mach.
Lysithea watched Annette sighed and went back to her seat beside Caspar. She herself sighed and looked at the professor's desk where Byleth had once been teaching only for it to be bereft of his appearance since the Guardian Moon began, she then looked to her side to see the space empty, a space that belonged to Edelgard.
Edelgard was no doubt trying to convince the professor to return to no avail or perhaps she was looking into what happened and the one responsible for all of this.
Monica… they never once suspected she of all people would do such a thing. For the second time, the whole of Garreg Mach were fooled by the same group of people that employed Solon and this time, Captain Jeralt paid the price with his life.
There were reports of suspicious activities in one of the unused chapels of Garreg Mach. After the ball which also was the time of Jeralt's return from a prior mission, the Black Eagles were once again honored with the assistance of the legendary Blade Breaker working alongside his son, their professor. The whole class have all experienced how it was like to be witnesses of such smooth and fluid cooperation between father and son. The cohesion they had, earned from all those years fighting together, they can see why the two have gained their respective monikers as The Blade Breaker and the Ashen Demon.
The Demonic Beasts fell steadily with father and son on the lead while the Black Eagles backed them up. Previous encounters with such dreadful creatures have hardened Byleth to the point that he knew how to quickly dispatch the hulking monstrosities with ease.
Utilizing the whip form of the Sword of the Creator, he bound the Demonic Beasts in place and while the monsters did try to struggle, they found it hard without sustaining any injury due to the sharp blades wrapped around them. While they were bound, Jeralt would use his lance to plunge it deep into their heads, instantly killing them. The Black Eagles followed suit with their own strategies that they and their professor developed over the months.
After dispatching of the monsters, the Black Eagles had helped evacuate some of the students that were nearly a quick snack by the Demonic Beasts and upon closer inspection in the chapel, Byleth and Jeralt found Monica, one of the missing students in it.
It all happened so quickly, all it took was a second… They were initially shocked when their professor suddenly drew the Sword of the Creator again and extended its blade to impale Monica in it only for a mysterious pale man to appear and block off the attack with magic, shocking everyone who witnessed the sudden turn of events.
It was at that moment that Lysithea and her classmates cursed their complacency on the situation, if they didn't bask in their victory and feeling of achievement in rescuing the students, they might have been able to do something.
If they kept vigilant, Captain Jeralt must have been still alive and they would never have seen their professor in such a state.
The Black Eagles could only watch in horror as Jeralt fell to the ground, a dagger lodged on his back, a dagger than once belonged to a classmate of theirs who committed the cowardly act of stabbing the seasoned warrior at the back.
Horror turned to sorrow when they saw Byleth cradle Jeralt's body, what the latter's last words towards his son were unknown to them, what they knew was the fact that they had just witnessed their professor shed tears.
It broke their hearts to see him in such a state, Professor Byleth… a man who kept and united them all together, a man who had shaped them to be better and a man who was also their close confidant.
To see such a man who showed little emotion break to most and warmest smile to those the few who knew him was a depressing sight. The ensuing rain didn't help as they were forced to see their professor grieve in nothing but sorrowful silence.
A couple of days had passed ever since Jeralt's funeral, everyone attended it in Garreg Mach, most of which were to pay their respects to the legendary captain of the Knights of Seiros for all the services he had done.
The students who idolized and marveled at the tales of his exploits in his prime days, the mercenaries and knights who served and fought under him and lastly, the members of the Church of Seiros that Jeralt has served and protected in his many years of service all attended the man's funeral.
All except the one person who should have been there.
Rather than attend his own father's funeral, Professor Byleth locked himself inside Jeralt's office, using his father's old office as his own personal quarters where he slept and ate ever since his father's passing, never coming out except for the occasional bathing.
While Alois and Seteth wanted to bring him out, Rhea strictly ordered everyone to stand down and allow the professor to grieve in his own way, only a few were allowed to see him to bring him food, something Alois and Edelgard had repeatedly volunteered to do so in their attempts to bring Byleth out of his grief.
It hurt Lysithea to see and hear about the professor in such a state, it made her feel so powerless and it only dampened down what could have been her best night, her encounter with him in the Goddess Tower, just a day after the grand ball.
Who would have thought that such tragedy was awaiting them just when things were beginning to go the right way for them?
Her resolution to him that she will make up for her neglected grades, she tried hard to get her marks back up to what they used to be and they did but she felt hollow with her accomplishment. Her professor was nowhere to witness it nor were Edelgard and Annette (her competition) at their best.
She couldn't blame them, the recent events had truly taken their toll in the overall spirit of the Black Eagle House and by extension, the whole of Garreg Mach.
Paranoia had once again gripped everyone with people thinking the others to be like Monica, people they now know aren't the ones that they thought to be. Shapeshifters or skin-walkers as they call the likes of Monica and Tomas hiding with them and biding their time to strike. Everyone feared they may be the next targets of a conspiracy especially students from the nobility or be the next ones to be replaced.
It came to the point that key figures of the Church were protected nearly every time such as Rhea and Seteth. The house leaders were also being protected by their more loyal members much to their chagrin.
"I understand your desire to see the professor return to what he was…"
All eyes went to the doorway leading out of the classroom to see Seteth and Edelgard walking together as if they were in the midst of an argument.
"I just think it is unfair that only I and a few have the privilege to see him. The others in my house are worried about him as well…" Edelgard reasoned.
Seteth sighed. "I'm afraid that's where we are in an impasse, the Archbishop is adamant in not letting anyone visit the professor in his time of grieving."
"Even at the cost of his personal welfare being cooped up inside? Alone?" Edelgard pressed with a frown. "Surely, you can't expect us, his students to just leave him at that." She reasoned.
The Archbishop's adviser once again sighed and looked to see everyone in the classroom were present except for one.
"Where is Felix?" Seteth asked the whole class in order to move away from his futile argument with Edelgard.
Annette was about to speak, having her own confrontation with the Fraldarius heir earlier but judging from the look, Seteth already knew the answer.
"That is the fifth time he has done this. Where is he?" Seteth groaned in irritation.
"T-Training grounds…" Annette stuttered, fearing for Felix at the wrath of the adviser.
"Send him over to my office later after class, I need to have a word with him." Seteth said as he went towards the table where Byleth used to stand before.
"I understand how the recent events have all affected you but that should not be an excuse to neglect your studies especially with graduation looming next month."
No one responded while some just sighed with indifference.
Edelgard looked displeased at how Seteth dodged her but nonetheless could do nothing but sit beside Lysithea with an unenthusiastic frown. She, like everyone else in the classroom, was in no mood to listen or learn anything today.
Lysithea glanced at Edelgard to ask something but it seemed her incoming inquiry was expected by her, Edelgard merely gave her a look with a shake of the head.
It was all that Lysithea needed to know that the professor was still despondent and preferred to be alone in his father's office.
While normally, Lysithea would feel excited at the prospect of coming home to finally reunite with her parents and used what she have learned from her professors and classmates to help them in their role as rules of Ordelia territory, Lysithea like all the others didn't care on the looming graduation, graduating felt hollow if the one responsible for their growth in the academy wasn't there at his best to witness them.
Even Professor Hanneman was mostly quiet during Lysithea's time in assisting him with his research and it mostly ended with both of them uttering words to each other.
It seemed even Hanneman felt sympathy for the professor and his loss almost as if he could relate to the feeling of grief that Professor Byleth was feeling.
Lysithea knew this when she witnessed Hanneman speaking with Manuela just as she was about to report in to assist the former, she had heard in one such extreme case that the two were amicably and calmly speaking to each other in their topic of dividing Byleth's workload as their way of helping him as he grieved.
While Manuela also felt the same way in her sympathy for the professor, she seemed to also talked to Hanneman regarding the weapon that was used to kill Jeralt and that she needed Hanneman's help in finding out about its properties.
"It didn't seem like a weapon made out of conventional metal was used to kill him."
"Are you saying the metal used wasn't iron, steel nor silver?"
"It seemed different. The wound it left on Jeralt's body while I analyzed it… the wound wasn't normal."
Their conversation was interrupted upon seeing Lysithea, something Manuela hastily said her goodbyes and promising to give Hanneman the weapon later on.
Nonetheless, their time together ended with Hanneman, in a rare case of zero babbling, thanking Lysithea for her minimal help and dismissing her early without any enigmatic or annoying experiments.
"Lady Edelgard, I hope you aren't getting second thoughts now, are you?"
"I'm not, Hubert."
"I understand your concern for the professor. What happened was unfortunate but we must press on as planned."
"I know. This was just too… unexpected."
Lysithea found herself turning on the next corner to see Edelgard and Hubert conversing to each other, discreetly if she might add, Hubert was quick to notice her presence and when Edelgard saw how her retainer shifted his gaze behind her, Edelgard turned around to see Lysithea.
Her lavender eyes were one of surprise like she was a child who was caught red-handed by her parents with her hand in the cookie jar.
"Why do you look like I've barged into something I shouldn't have heard about?" Lysithea asked.
Edelgard's mouth opened for a response but was prevented by Hubert who spoke for her.
"We were discussing how to sneak some of the class who wish to try and draw the professor out of his stupor." Hubert explained with an unmoving cold look, if Lysithea thought Byleth was as stone faced as people claimed he was back then, Hubert would be the second contender for that.
Lysithea frowned. "I thought we had strict orders from Lady Rhea that no one else is allowed to bother the professor unless permitted to do so?"
She hated that rule, it felt like the Archbishop herself was imprisoning Byleth in Jeralt's quarters and letting only a few 'authorized' people to visit him like a prisoner in a jail cell. She understood the professor needed privacy but how much is too much in staying cooped up inside?
Edelgard sighed after giving Hubert a look, despite feeling like it is a sigh of exasperation, Lysithea could detect a hint of relief in it.
"We know but I am afraid it would be more than me and some other selected people to try to pull the professor out."
"And this plan?" Lysithea questioned.
"Merely a grand plan Lady Edelgard had thought of to celebrate our graduation next week."
"Right, I was nearly having second thoughts in going through with it." Edelgard nodded. "Lysithea, perhaps you and the professor can..."
Edelgard stopped herself and shook her head.
"Perhaps I?"
"It's nothing." Edelgard said with a sad smile. "I must go, there's other matters I have to attend to." She said before taking her leave, walking passed Lysithea while being followed by Hubert, the latter gave Lysithea a look that seemed to be of suspicion before facing the direction where his liege lord was heading.
Despite what Edelgard and Hubert said, Lysithea could tell something: she might be a terrible liar but she knows a lie when she hears it.
With a groan, Lysithea went to her intended location after she finished with assisting Hanneman, the library where she intends to spend the remainder of her day at least until dinner to distract herself away and to also help her in achieving something to please the professor when he hopefully returns, until she passed by a certain closed door.
She stopped in front of it and scanned it with her eyes, a mix of curiosity and sorrow were within her pinkish orbs. Behind the door before her was Jeralt's office, the place that the professor had chosen to imprison and seclude himself away from everyone ever since his father's death.
Ever since Jeralt passed, Lysithea has not caught sight of Byleth after they returned from their successful but all the same ill-fated mission. She had last seen him, soaked wet with rain and despite it being covered by the raindrops, Lysithea knew tears also stained his face. The confident and straight stature he used to have, all gone, before her was a man looking constantly down and his hands tightly clenched with both grief and anger.
None said anything and none of them even had the chance to as he departed from them to report.
That was the last time she had caught sight of him, Lysithea tried to at least visit him in his office or quarters but all the time they were bereft of the professor's presence.
Now, she stands before the door and after a brief moment of hesitation, Lysithea knocks on the door, her thoughts still filled with apprehension with what she was doing.
There was no answer. Lysithea knocked again and this time, she called him out.
"Professor?"
Again, the cold silence of the wooden door was her answer.
Lysithea was getting increasingly worried at the lack of answer and thus, despite her own reservations in what she deems as being too invasive of her professor's privacy, her right hand held the door knob, she slowly and hesitantly turned it around, hearing a click within the door's mechanism as it opened.
The door creaked and by now, she could see the dimly lit office that used to be Jeralt in the small opening.
Swallowing, Lysithea slowly opened the door and allowed herself in, entering the dark room.
"Professor, I'm sorry for intruding-"
Lysithea gasped not because of seeing the professor in his pitiful state but because of the fact that the man she was searching for was nowhere in the office.
She didn't panic at first as she thought the professor must have been lying down behind the desk only to find nothing except a dusty old journal laying on the table. Her eyes regarded the journal, a part of her speaking to her to open and read it out of curiosity to what it contained but a better part of her reasoning told her she had intruded far enough as it is and that she had far more pressing matters.
The matter of where in the world is the professor if he wasn't even in his father's office?
She looked around at the office, seeing plates of mostly untouched food suggesting the professor hadn't been eating well, she then noticed the opened window on the far left of the office overlooking outside the Knights Hall.
Lysithea noticed the darkening skies outside but it didn't deter her short investigation that bore fruit when she noticed the damaged stone at the side of the window frame she was looking from, it bore the shape of a sword's edge…
Piecing the puzzle immediately, Lysithea knew the professor discreetly used his Sword of the Creator and it's alternate whip form to descend from the high heights of the office down to the monastery grounds in which she assumed was part of the professor's effort to avoid attention.
With the information at hand and having a full idea where he was going, Lysithea quickly exited the office in a rush, surprising Cyril from outside who was even more surprised to see the Ordelia girl leaving the office as he carried a tray of food for the professor to eat, most of which were barely eaten.
Along the way, Lysithea went through the reception hall only to be met by a rather loud and haughty voice that she hasn't heard since the ball.
She looked at her side to see Lorenz returning, beaming in pride in something he had accomplished as he approached Claude and Hilda who were talking to each other in one of the tables.
Lysithea could care less on Lorenz' arrival but one thing caught her eye, it was the unusual staff he was holding, the way it looked… It felt so eeriely familiar to the likes of the Lance of Ruin, Ingrid's Luin and the professor's Sword of the Creator.
Then when it glowed bright orange when Lorenz raised it up to show it to Claude in an attempt to make him green with envy, telling Claude that he got it from his father as a reward for aiding against treacherous Alliance lord that Lysithea might have heard but not cared to know more about. Lysithea felt a pull to it and that was when she knew that the staff was no ordinary magic staff… if her memory serves her correctly, she recalled the time she spent helping Hanneman with his research.
There was one known relic of power that only possessors of the Crest of Gloucester can use.
But alas, despite the strong pull she felt towards the relic, Lysithea ignored it and pressed on, missing the shocked look on Lorenz' face after Claude and Hilda told him the tragedy that befell Garreg Mach during his absence and for once, there was no hint of amusement to Lorenz' expense in Claude's face as he told him everything that has transpired.
Lysithea knew there was only one place that the professor could have gone to but as she slowly approached the location that she had her hunched on, she slowed down.
She thought, what would she tell him? What would she do? Offer him her condolences like so many had? To tell him to move on and find ways to honor Jeralt?
Then, her mind raced on Jeralt. She recalled that time when Jeralt visited the Black Eagles classroom, the whole class were waiting for their professor to arrive and brief them on the mission they were about to embark on in a few days: Remire Village, to investigate an unusual pandemic that soon proved to be a sick experiment.
Jeralt arrived that day, also looking for his son. Lysithea, that time was despondent most of the time due to the scandal that had plagued her and the professor, she was also beginning to feel it's effects on her brought down by those who believed the false rumors.
He had asked the class what they thought of Byleth, opinions of which varied but most if not all were positive reception towards his son. Perhaps out of consideration, he never asked Lysithea that question after he witnessed her and Byleth's 'trial' and Rhea's judgment on the matter. Perhaps he knew that asking her what she thinks of the professor at that moment would do more harm than good.
Going forward, Jeralt told them stories of Byleth, things they did not know and were given answers to their questions such as what is his favorite food, when was the first time he smiled and how he was like, Lysithea couldn't recall back then who asked the question but Jeralt was asked when was the first time his son cried.
His answer shocked them, not even once as a baby.
Before more could be shared, the professor arrived which interrupted the growing curiosity of his students and the small smile of Jeralt as he told stories of his son.
Lysithea could remember the forlorn and longing look Jeralt had during their first encounterad when they first met. She recalled it while Jeralt's coffin was being laid to rest as she and the others attended the burial, she caught sight of the new gravestone before the dug earth.
Sitri Eisner
1139-1159
Resting in the warm embrace of cherished memories.
She died young, Lysithea thought when she stared at the grave, she didn't bother hearing Rhea's rites to Jeralt, she stared at the grave before her mind raced back to the longing look Jeralt bore when he made an offhand mention of his wife months ago. She finally understood why Jeralt bore such a forlorn look, he lost the love of his wife so early at the age of twenty, leaving him a widower.
The Ordelia girl gripped her chest as she remembered what she felt that time: Dread.
Could that be the fate of the people who love her when the inevitable time of her passing comes? Will her parents ever look that way after she had freed them from the burdens of nobility? How about her friends? Annette? Edelgard? Professor Byleth?
There was a reason why she was so averse to falling in love or leading someone on with such romantic notions, she didn't want them to experience the pain of losing someone, a person they shouldn't fall in love with due to the inevitability of her fate.
Lysithea's slowed movement ceased when she found herself standing above the set of marble stairs leading down to the graveyard and finally caught sight of the one person she had been thinking of all this time.
She had been avoiding this place for quite some time because of that horrifying incident she experienced during that time and the subsequent events that followed.
But that did not matter at the moment, for below those stairs stood the professor standing still in front of the graves of his parents.
The earth that was dug up to bury Jeralt still has not shown signs of the grass growing in it, reminding Byleth of how recently his father was buried.
An event that he did not attend.
The professor then noticed the fresh bouquet of flowers that were offered before the grave, he knew who offered them as he saw Bernadetta discreetly place them as an offering before leaving, having witnessed her doing so before his own discreet descent down from the office.
Byleth clenched his fists, his azure blue eyes staring at the gravestone with a new inscription on it.
Sitri Eisner
1139-1159
Jeralt Eisner
?-1180
Resting in the warm embrace of cherished memories.
Byleth frowned, even in his grave, some aspect of Jeralt remains a mystery that he has no answers. He didn't even know how old his father was, he just remembered the time when he saw Leonie and Jeralt talking to each other during his first months in Garreg Mach.
Leonie had asked him how old Jeralt was, something that Jeralt told her off that if he doesn't know, how would his own child know?
"By the time you're forgetting your own age, you're past the point of caring."
Then, he recalled Leonie asked him his age. Byleth couldn't give out an answer because he himself didn't know and Jeralt offered nothing of such information.
"Liar." Byleth murmured meant for his father.
He was twenty one years old, that much was certain when he read his father's dusty old journal that Jeralt instructed him to find should anything happen to him.
"20th of the Horsebow Moon of the Imperial Year 1159." He spoke his true birthday that he initially believed to be 4th of the Red Wolf Moon, another lie his father told him.
One of many lies Jeralt made him believe, all in an effort to protect him… from Rhea. The fateful day of his birth also marked the death of his mother. What was meant to be Jeralt's happiest day in welcoming his child with Sitri into the world turned out to be his most devastating moment.
Byleth had all pieced the puzzle together why Jeralt did little to teach him of the ways of the Church of Seiros despite Jeralt's faith and his devotion to Rhea, he was afraid from the latter and at what she did or didn't want to divulge. Jeralt did not want him to be in any way involved with Rhea and the Church of Seiros, fearing what Rhea planned to do.
Byleth placed his right hand over to his chest, no heartbeat. He had often wondered in his entire life why his heart did not show the slightest faint of a heartbeat, Jeralt made up a reason that seemed improbable yet Byleth never truly questioned it all his life.
The fire he started to cover up the newborn's death, it was a ploy to trick the Church of Seiros and Rhea to think the child dead and any of the latter's plans to be burned with it.
He had so many questions, most of which could have been answered by Jeralt if he lived… now, only one such person holds the key to what he truly is and it was the very same person that Jeralt tried to shield him away from.
"Professor…"
Byleth remained still as the skies rumbled, he knew who was behind him, a voice he had not heard from for so many days like so many others.
"Professor-"
"Are you here to say your condolences?" Byleth interrupted her. "Or are you also going to tell me to snap out of it so I can move forward?"
He sounded harsh on the latter, coldly harsh as if he was expecting such words from her. It only took him a second for Byleth to regret what he just told her, it made him feel terrible that his pent-up anger and grief would lead him to act this way to her.
Lysithea looked pained by her professor's words but stayed behind him, her concern for him overriding anything as she stared at her professor who refused to look back at her.
"I can never do something so presumptuous to you, professor." Lysithea meekly replied.
"Edelgard just did a while ago." Byleth stonily replied.
Lysithea's eyes widened, perhaps that explained why Edelgard and Hubert were discussing things about the professor near the door earlier… she felt some sort of indignation towards Edelgard's rather lack of tact, did she perhaps tried to bluntly tell the professor to snap out of his grief and come back to them? It all seemed so inconsiderate despite Lysithea and others wanting the professor to go back to them.
There was a round of silence between the two, the wind had begun to blow as the skies above them darkened.
"I am tired of people saying how sorry they are over something they had no control of. There was nothing to be apologized for." Byleth told her.
"Professor, they're just worried about you…"
"Which is exactly why I chose to leave my father's office in such a way, I don't need to hear their pity." Byleth explained, assuming Lysithea would have found out how he arrived in the graveyard without being noticed, she was far too intelligent not to piece it all together.
That was something Lysithea could very well sympathize with and the reason why she never told anyone of her story and what happened to her, someone else's sympathy won't make things any better.
"Speak your piece and leave me." Byleth coldly added.
Lysithea thought this must have been also some form of karma for her avoiding him during the onset of the scandal, having to witness him acting as cold and uncaring as some of the students and staff initially gossiped about.
She had long wanted to talk to him and try to help him pull through but why is it now that she's in his presence, she was at loss of words?
"I don't really know what to tell you, professor. It's just that, I know how you feel-"
"You don't."
"I do!" Lysithea pressed on, she herself knew what the professor was feeling for the first time in his life, she knew the pain all too well.
Byleth was silent as he kept looking down at his parent's grave. Lysithea took this as her cue to continue.
"I wasn't the only child of House Ordelia." Lysithea said with hesitance, she took a deep breath at what she was about to tell someone regarding the dark past she had kept to herself all these time.
"I was the eldest child of Count and Countess Ordelia, I had many other siblings and cousins, all of which I had played and got along with while growing up."
By now, Lysithea was looking at the grass, her hands trembling on what she was telling her professor, remembering the memories that came along with it, memories she'd rather forget. Unknown to her, Byleth tilted his head to his right, barely catching a glimpse of her at the corner of his eye.
"Then one by one, they all died." Lysithea said, her thoughts straying into the same scenario she had kept seeing when she was young: a dark day… her family dressed in black… freshly dug graves and the sounds of mourning…
"I kept seeing them die one by one, buried to be mourned until I was the only one that remained." Lysithea said as her body shook.
Byleth regarded her with softened eyes, shock initially took over him as his student relayed her story to him, a story he hadn't thought she had, to think that someone so young has experienced the grief of losing so many she cared about in such a short time…
"That's why I know what you feel, professor. Captain Jeralt was your father and despite me only meeting him a few times, he had spoken about you so fondly… he sounded so proud of you."
Byleth flinched as his hands shook, his eyes looking back at his parents' grave.
"I'm sure that despite what happened to him, he would have wanted you to continue on living, and I know you will pull through this because you're so strong, professor." Lysithea continued as tears flowed down from her eyes.
She was only met with silence as she looked back at her professor, his back still facing her, the only thing that disrupted the gloomy silence were the rumbling skies.
Figuring she had said enough, Lysithea took the steps to turn around and leave Byleth be, giving him the privacy he needs to mourn his father.
"I never really thought he cared about me that much for a long time."
Lysithea paused just as she was about to take a step on the concrete stairs. She turned to see her professor again as the latter looked up at the darkened skies. The color of the sky and the inevitable downpour it will bring down upon them eerily reminded him so much of the day Jeralt died.
"All I remember of him during my childhood was the stoic face he had, he never smiled at me. When he returned from a mission, he would just ask about my wellbeing before going to get himself drunk around the campfire or a tavern." Byleth said as he remembered what fragments remained of his memories as a child growing up in a traveling mercenary band.
"Then, one day he took me to fish for food, teaching me all what he knew. I thought he merely wanted me to provide some use to the camp but when I caught a fish for the first time, I remember myself smiling… when I looked back at him, it was the first time I saw him smile towards me. He was smiling because I smiled for the first time in his eyes."
An image of Jeralt's hardened face, melting down due to the first genuine smile he witnessed from his son flashed through Byleth's mind.
"I used to think he never really cared for my safety, he would always leave me behind with some of his men to fend for ourselves but one day, bandits ambushed us… when he returned, he saw only corpses of his men and bandits alike. I remember the look of fear he had, the horror he felt until he saw me crawling out of my hiding place, covered in blood and dirt." Byleth admitted.
"I knew he cared that day when he rushed towards me and checked if I was alright, he breathed a sigh of relief when he saw I was unharmed."
Lysithea remained silent, her eyes wide as it could be, hearing some of her professor's story for the first time.
"He really cared." Byleth repeated as he finally understood why his father was like that, he finally knew why Jeralt had seemed so distant prior to their arrival in Garreg Mach…
The toll of the death of his mother, the circumstance behind it and his birth, the one thing Jeralt had been looking for and wanted with Sitri, it all came crashing down on him in one day. It was enough for someone like Jeralt to be depressed and turn him to the bottle in an attempt to forget thinking about the ill fate of Sitri and what happened to Byleth, what they could have had together, what they wanted together.
He thought of Jeralt as a drunkard growing up, one who didn't care or show any sign of parental love towards him.
Byleth knew such early assumptions of him were wrong and he regretted thinking of Jeralt in such a way.
Despite his depressed state, Jeralt had been protecting him all this time, he didn't want him to face a similar fate like his mother of leaving him alone. Byleth was what only remained of Sitri in this world, a piece of her he desperately clung on to and the way he had lived his life was to protect what remained of Sitri in the world, him.
His time brooding on his father's office, Byleth had repeatedly recalled the times Jeralt was with him, the training he undertook to protect himself, the times he taught him how to read and write, when Jeralt protectively kept him close to him as they slept when he was a child and the faintest smiles he gave him for a job well done as well as the angered scoldings borne out of fatherly concern when Byleth made mistakes.
Jeralt truly loved him.
He was the one thing that kept him together.
To go on and continue living for Sitri's sake.
"To think that the first time I saw you cry...your tears would be for me. It's sad, and yet...I'm happy for it. Thank you...kid."
Now, Byleth understood why Jeralt was happy to see him cry for him for the first time, in death, he was finally assured that his son wasn't void of any emotion beyond redemption and he knew that despite all their time barely showing any emotion together, Jeralt knew that his son cared for him enough to shed tears, that he too loves him.
The skies above finally unleashed the drops of rain, soaking Byleth and Lysithea as they stood in the graveyard but despite the heavy rain, Lysithea knew it wasn't the only thing that had soaked her professor.
He was crying again, for the second time, she was seeing him cry once again.
Lysithea worriedly looked on as she heard Byleth's muffled sobs despite the heavy rainfall, his body trembling uncontrollably in grief.
It hurt her to see him like this, the person she had looked up to the most since her time in Garreg Mach, the person who had made such a huge impact in her life in such a short time and the person she fell in love with.
Seeing him fall down to his knees, touching the gravestone as hot tears mixed with the cold rain dripped down on the stone, it was too much for Lysithea to bear.
Without caring for anyone who would see them, Lysithea came near her professor's back and tenderly wrapped her arms around his neck, her chin resting on his shoulder as Byleth quietly let out his feelings of grief, she didn't want to let him go until he was fine.
She wanted him to know that she was there for him and that he wasn't alone.
She wanted him to know.
She wanted him to know…
They stayed like that under the heavy rainfall beneath the tenebrous skies hanging above Garreg Mach.
Man, this was honestly one of the hardest chapters to write because of how overly dark and broody it was to write it.
It also seems to be the shortest chapter I have written so far (barring the prologue chapter) because I couldn't seem to find anything else to expand on due to the pacing and context of the chapter. This honestly drained a lot in me while writing it.
That being said, I am glad to announce we have one more month in the White Clouds saga to cover which would possibly be split into two! I am so excited to move forward to the next saga that you are all aware of!
As usual, kudos and comments are very much appreciated! Thank you!