Another chapter in the story that can determine the future of…a group of people. I don't know how many anymore. You decipher the truth…if you don't go insane in the process.
Disclaimer – We (Sanoon and AnimeFreak84) Do not own any of the character from any of the shows. However, AnimeFreak owns Zim's kids, and Sanoon owns Black Mages great personality skills and Pix. Everyone else goes to their respective owners.
Freeing the Doomed
A joint-fic by Sanoon and AnimeFreak84
The real chapter 4: Questing and Pregnancy
The sun was shining, and the birds were singing. There were three people…well, actually two people and a ball of meat out on the driveway of Travis's home. There was a small wooded cart with scribbles on the side of it that said, 'Danger Cart'. The group had also installed a canvas on top of it, so any adverse weather wouldn't get annoying. Travis and Black Mage were loading the cart with cardboard boxes. Each box contained supplies that would be needed on their journey. Black Mage had packed all of the supplies, and Travis was actually curious to see what Black Mage considered 'necessary'. Most of the boxes came from Black Mage's room. Black Mage kept his door magically locked, so Travis never got to go into his room. Black Mage walked back into his house to grab some more supplies, while Meatwad just played in the front yard with Dewey, Vanessa and Boxy Brown. Travis opened up the box he was carrying, and looked at its contents. He started to pull out each item to examine them.
He pulled out safety case and opened it up. There were a few mana potions inside. Travis put the mana potions back into the box, and grabbed another one. This box had 'Do not open unless you are Black Mage' written on it. Travis opened it up, hoping for some doomsday scrolls. He was somewhat disappointed when he pulled out a magazine, which had a picture of a black mage on it. Travis assumed it was a girl, because the black mage had long hair. Travis opened up the book, and his eyes widened in surprise. "W-wow," Travis mumbled in shock after taking a few seconds to take in what he was looking at. "I didn't know Black Mage was into this type of stuff."
Travis heard the front door open, so he quickly put the magazine back into the box and shut it. Black Mage walked over to the danger cart with another box, and saw Travis just standing there. "You looked inside that box, didn't you?" Black Mage asked, pointing to the box in front of Travis.
"No, of course not," Travis lied. The look in Travis's eyes gave Black Mage his answer.
"Right, of course you didn't," Black Mage said sarcastically. He pushed the boxes to the back of the danger cart, and hopped on. "Lets see," Black Mage mumbled to himself while he observed the boxes. "Food, water, entertainment, potions, money…what else, what else?" He asked himself.
"You got the location of the address, right?" Travis asked.
"Yes, yes," Black Mage said quickly. "Say, tell me again why we're not taking your car? We could get there in a day instead of a month."
"Because Pix is taking me into space, and I don't trust your driving skills. Plus, I don't want Meatwad sitting on my dragon car seats," Travis replied.
"Why are you going into space with Pix…again?" Black Mage asked angrily. "You two have been going up there more frequently. What the hell are you two doing up there?"
"That's a secret," Travis replied quickly.
"Why the hell aren't you going?" Black Mage asked. "You're the one that agreed to help the Tallests. Why do I have to do all of the work?"
"You're not doing all of the work," Travis replied. "Meatwad is pulling the danger cart. And you're going because I have things I need to finish here."
"Of course," Black Mage replied. He took a seat in Travis's moon chair that he took from the basement and put on the danger cart. "Meatwad," Black Mage called out. "Meatwad, we're going."
Meatwad rolled over with his dolls, and put them inside the cart. "Hey, quick question," Meatwad said. "How come I have to be the one who pulls the cart?"
"Because you're the only one who can," Black Mage replied.
"Yeah, I guess you're right," Meatwad replied. He rolled over and latched himself onto the carts handles.
"Say," Black Mage said to Travis, "If Meatwad gets a moon, then what do I get?"
"Power," Travis replied. "Too bad Rouge isn't here to help. He'd love the spoils. Where is he anyway?"
"He left to find a place where he could strike it rich," Black Mage answered.
"Wonder where that is?" Travis asked.
Somewhere in Las Vegas,
"Step right up people, step right up," Rouge said to a group of people. He was dressed up as a casino dealer. "Place your bets, and lets play some craps." The man rolled his dice, and got snake eyes. "Oh, you lose," Rouge said with fake sympathy to the man. He took the man's chips, and heard the sound of someone winning a jackpot on the slots machine. "Excuse me," Rouge announced to the group of people at the craps table. "I have to use the restroom, this table will be temporarily closed." The people sighed, and left the table.
Rouge made his way over to the slots machine to play his next victim.
Back in Ohio,
"Wherever he is, I'm pretty sure he's making someone's life horrible," Black Mage commented.
"Black Mage!" An angry voice shouted from the doorway of the house. "You left the door open again!" Black Mage and Travis looked towards the doorway. An Irken, out of her disguise, with purple eyes glared angrily at the three. Her curved antenna twitched as she stood there.
"The grumps here," Black Mage whispered to Travis.
"Hi Pix," Meatwad shouted, waving his meat arm. Pix waved back at Meatwad, but the angry look on her face didn't dissipate.
"Sorry Pix, damn," Black Mage shouted back. "Calm down, it doesn't happen that often."
"Travis, are you ready yet?" Pix asked.
"In a minute," Travis replied.
"Well, I guess we better get going. You have fun with Pix," Black Mage said sarcastically. Meatwad started to pull the cart out of the driveway.
"Remember Black Mage," Travis said as the cart slowly pulled out. "This is a rescue mission, not a 'destroy Florida mission'. Understand?"
"I know," Black Mage replied.
"We need Tallest Red and Purple back alive."
"I know!" Black Mage shouted angrily. "You don't have to tell me so many times. I understand." The cart left the driveway, and slowly proceeded down the street.
"Travis, lets go," Pix shouted from the doorway. Travis walked back into the house to prepare for his journey into space.
The next day, Osaka was standing in the bathroom she cleaned recently. She gulped as she held a pregnancy test in her hand.
"It's positive…"
Osaka's face went pale. Then Antasia called, "MARTHA STEWART, GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE!" up the stairs. Osaka sighed and threw away her pregnancy test and went downstairs, where all the other slave-bitches were. When they met like this, it meant that there was someone new Antasia captured.
Antasia smirked evilly.
"We have one new slave-bitch, fucktards! I'm sure you're all familiar with Erica!"
"Erica?" they all said, in confusion.
Antasia chuckled a little and turned around to face another room.
"ERICA, GET IN HERE RIGHT FUCKING NOW!"
"Ugh…"
And out stepped Eddy in a maid outfit like the Tallests, Zoey, Yotsuba, Rini, Squee, Zim, Osaka, and Davis were in. Yotsuba gasped and everyone else got a bit shocked. Yotsuba ran over to him. Momoko was at Antasia's friend's house playing, by the way.
"Shit! Don't tell me she caught you too!"
"Yep. This bitch caught me trying to save you last night. Sockhead and Lumpy ran away before she could get to them," Eddy said.
"You tried to save me? Oh, Eddy…I LOVE YOU SO GODDAMN MUCH, YOU MORON!" Yotsuba told Eddy. She was touched her selfish boyfriend tried to save her.
Yotsuba hugged him, but Antasia growled, meaning she couldn't do that. She let go and Eddy was very confused.
"What the fuck?" Eddy said, confused.
"You can't fucking hug your girlfriend! Understand?"
"No! I don't!"
Antasia got mad and whacked Eddy.
"DON'T TALK BACK TO ME, ERICA!" Antasia said, pissed off.
"Yes ma'am." Was Eddy's bitter-sounding reply.
Then Antasia turned to Osaka and gave her a curious look. "Hey, Martha Stewart, why were you in the bathroom for so freakin' long? If you got some gastro problem or something, you should've told me before so I wouldn't have to yell at you to hurry up."
Everyone gave her a weird look.
"When the fuck are you THIS caring?" Tallest Purple and Zoey said at the same time.
Antasia shrugged.
"If you have some medical problem, AND IF I DON'T FIND OUT YOU'RE LYING, I can't expect you to do all that much work!" she said.
Everyone gave her weird looks again. "O…kay…" Davis said.
"Well, do you have gastro problems?"
"No…and ah don't wanna say!" Osaka said.
"YOU HAVE TO, DAMMIT!" Antasia said.
Osaka gulped and turned to Zim.
"Zimmy-kun…ahm pregnant." Osaka told her husband, slowly. Zim screamed, "WHAT?" The others, including Antasia, were trying very hard not to laugh. Zim and Osaka have a slightly overactive sex life, so…
Zim's eye began twitching and a demented smile grew across his face. This began scaring everyone.
"You're…you're pregnant, Osa-chan?" Zim said in a demented tone of voice. Osaka slowly nodded and Zim began chuckling insanely. The chuckling turned into hysterical laughter quickly and Zim ran up to Davis and Rini and hugged them. "HELLO!" he screamed at them. Then he kissed them Bugs Bunny style. Davis and Rini were wide eyed and were disturbed beyond belief. Tallest Red, Eddy, Yotsuba, Zoey and Squee were cracking up. Tallest Purple and Osaka were speechless and weren't amused by this behavior. Antasia ran out of the house, very disturbed, by this time.
Then Zim went up to Eddy and Yotsuba and Zim gave Eddy a condom.
"USE IT, EDDY! I APPARENTLY DON'T GIVE MUCH OF A SHIT TO PUT ONE ON, SO IT'S ALL YOURS! SCREW MY DAUGHTER, I DON'T CARE!" Yotsuba was mortified, beet red and shocked by her dad's statement. She knew he's just gone crazy, but it's still shocking.
Eddy, on the other hand, was grinning. He turned to Yotsuba and said, "You heard the man!"
Yotsuba shook her head, "Not until we're older!" Eddy moaned.
"COME ON! YOUR DAD SAID IT WAS FINE!"
"No! My parents began screwing when they were teenagers and look how THEY turned out!"
Eddy thought about that for a minute then grew mortified himself. "Uhh…forget what I said…there's no way in hell if we ever get married that I'm having seven kids! I'd friggin' die! And worse, they might all turn out like YOU!" Yotsuba smirked.
"Wise decision." she told him.
Squee gave his grandfather a weird look after he was done singing to Zoey, Tallest Purple, Osaka and Tallest Red.
"SQUEE, grandpa! Are you SQUEE okay?"
"Hell yeah! I'M FINE, MOMOKO!" Zim said, insanely.
"I'm SQUEE Squee, grandpa!" Squee told him.
"WHATEVER!"
And for the rest of the day, they watched Zim go nuts. That night, Tallest Red woke up and noticed Yotsuba wasn't in her bed. After quietly looking around the house, he found her in the pool enclosure in the backyard.
"What the hell are you doing out here, Yotsuba-chan?" Tallest Red asked, quietly.
Yotsuba turned to them. "I couldn't sleep. I don't think I slept in four days in this hell hole," she told him. Tallest Red sat down next to her and smirked. He told her, "I thought with your beloved Eddy to protect you that you'd be around you would be able to sleep! Damn!"
Yotsuba punched Tallest Red in the back, playfully. They stayed up for a little while longer, talking, before they went to sleep.
Sanoon – And the month-long journey has started. Take a guess how many people Black Mage will destroy. You might be right. Stay tuned for future nuttiness.
Animefreak84 – Will Zim continue to be stupid? Will the other Ed's be captured? Will Momoko come back and be cute again? Will I stop asking questions? I dunno...