Calvin rocketed towards Hogwarts.
He zoomed across the grounds, with the magical creatures right on his tail.
Calvin started twisting the wheel to the left.
The machine started turning in a large circle.
They were circling the castle.
Calvin hit full throttle, and was able to stay a good yard away from the ever approaching creatures.
"Alright." Calvin said, turning to the crowd in front of him. "We can either sit here, and wait for the machine to run out of gas, or leap out of the machine and make a run for the castle. Which one's it gonna be?"
Everyone stared at him.
"Very well, we can leave." Calvin said. "However, I may want to get my inventions packed up."
Calvin piled his inventions into his Hypercube.
He slipped the Hypercube into his pocket.
"Let us be off!" Calvin yelled.
Calvin reached into his pocket, and grabbed his Time Pauser.
Hobbes took hold of Calvin, and Harry took hold of Hobbes.
Harry had to grab Sally so he'd fall into Time Stop too.
BOOM!
The box froze. So did everything behind it.
Calvin calmly climbed out of the box. Everybody else followed.
Except Sally that is, who had to be dragged out.
Everyone hid in some weeds, and Calvin started time back up, again.
BOOM!
The box bolted past Calvin. So did the other creatures who assumed they were all still in the box.
"Come on!" Calvin yelled. "We have one minute before the Time Machine passes by here, again!"
Calvin, Hobbes, Harry, and Sally raced across the ground.
And Sally only came, because Calvin told him that doorknobs were involved.
Calvin and Hobbes zoomed into the castle as the box zoomed past them, again.
"We have to find Double door, and tell him he his yard has been invaded by aliens." Calvin said. "Now then, where is Doubley's office?"
"I know!" Panted Harry. "Come on!"
Harry lead everyone up the stone staircase to the gargoyle sitting between them and the door.
"Sherbert lemon." Harry panted.
The gargoyle leapt from the way, and revealed the staircase up to Dombledore's office.
Harry, Calvin and Hobbes raced up the stairs.
Sally stood there, looking simple.
When they reached the office they found it was empty.
"Oh no!" Harry yelled. "He's not here!"
"News flash."
"He's at a meeting in the Great Hall!"
Calvin and Hobbes and Harry raced down the stairs, zoomed past the drooling Sally, and bolted towards the Great Hall.
Sally watched them go.
"I wasn't aware that grey things had arms." He babbled.
No comment.
They all burst into the Great Hall, taking the teachers by surprise.
"HUH!" McGonnagal yelled. "But you had..."
"Because!" Calvin screamed. "GET OUTSIDE! AND BRING WAND! AND HURRY FIRST CHANCE YOU GET!"
Everyone stared at him.
"What?" Snape asked.
Calvin sighed, and slapped his head.
"Let's just leave it at the word MACKMAL." He said.
The teachers all leaped to their feet, and followed Calvin and Hobbes to the front door.
"There ya go." Calvin said. "Have fun with them."
"You brought MACKMALS onto the school grounds!" McGonnagal screamed.
"Yup." Calvin grinned. "Are you proud of me?"
All the teachers slapped their foreheads.
But then, Raxton and Gripton spotted Calvin.
"AH HA!" Raxton screamed. "Got dumby wizard cornered, ho ho!"
The Mackmals started to move in.
Calvin gave them a friendly wave.
"Hi, guys? How's the family?"
They stopped, and stared at him.
"Family hungry." Raxton snarled.
"Uh huh." Calvin said, tapping his chin. "And how's ths kids?"
"Kids hungry!"
"Mm-hmmm." Calvin said, studying his fingernails. "And how are you doing?"
"Hungry."
"Fascinating." Calvin said. "Well, guys, I hate to tell you this, but I know more secret knowledge, that you don't know."
The Mackmals stared at Calvin, and began laughing.
"HA! Mackmal not believe this time!"
"Oh yeah?" Calvin asked, raising an eyebrow. "What if I'm right?"
"Mackmal not care."
At that very moment McGonnagal stepped in.
"ALARIOUS!" She screamed.
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZT!
The Mackmals screeched, as a blast of electricity hit them both in the chest.
Calvin pointed his finger, and laughed at them.
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH... GASP!...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Take that you Weed-Dews!"
After the teachers had warded off all the Mackmals
, it took them fifteen minutes, then, they all turned sharp glares on Calvin.
Calvin looked around.
"Uh, Would now be a good time to discuss the brotherhood of all humans, and human like creatures?" He asked, nervously.
He looked behind his shoulder.
Guess what?
Hobbes and Harry and vanished.
Calvin gulped, and turned back to his fate.
Later, that morning, Calvin was in the Common room, shoving all his stuff into his Hypercube.
Hobbes walked up.
"Guess what, Calvin?" Hobbes asked. "We explained to all the teachers on how you saved Harry from he-whose-name-is-very-hard-to-pronounce. They were so happy that you weren't just being stupid that they made a full apology."
"That's great, Hobbes." Calvin growled. "Don't you think that story would've come in more handy BEFORE THEY EXPELLED ME!"
"I guess so." Hobbes said.
Calvin shoved the last item into his Hypercube.
Harry, Ron, and Hermonie walked up.
"Calvin," Harry said. "I wanted to thank you for finding Sirius for me."
Calvin looked up.
"What? Oh yeah, sure thing."
"I never would've found him without you."
"Uh huh."
"And we wanted to give you a token of our appreciation." Hermonie said.
"Oh BOY!" Calvin yelled, leaping up. "Now this is more like it! A gift!"
Ron handed Calvin a book.
"What's this thing?" He asked.
"It's a Solution Book." Hermonie said. "Whenever you have a problem, just open the book, and it'll give you an answer."
"HOT DOG!" Calvin screamed, grabbing the book away. "Gee whiz, this is working out better than I thought!"
Calvin piled the book into his Hypercube.
"Alright, Hobbes, let's go."
Calvin took his cloak off, revealing his trademark red T-shirt and black pants.
Calvin dropped the cloak on the ground, and he and Hobbes climbed into the Time Machine.
"OK!" Calvin said, as Hobbes climbed in. "If ya see Merlin tell him hi!"
Calvin hit the thrusters, and rocketed out of he window.
Harry, Ron, and Hermonie waved goodbye to their heros.
"Who's Merlin?" Ron asked.
Before Harry or Hermonie could answer a terrible screaming echoed throughout the castle.
"FIRE! WHERE'S A FIRE! FIRE ALERT! FIRE ALERT! SPIT ON THE FIRE, AND PUT OUT THE GALLOPING FLAMES!"
"I said, we're firing you, Sally." Said another cold voice.
"FIRE!"
Sally exploded into the Common Room, and screamed.
"HANDS UP! THERE'S A FIRE!"
Sally ran over to Ron and tried to perform what he called, the "high lick thingy".
McGonnagal burst into the common room.
"SALLY!" She screamed. "Get away from the students!"
"FIRE! THERE'S ONLY ONE THING TO DO!"
He took dead aim at the wall.
"RETREAT!" He screamed.
He started pumping his legs and went roaring for the brick wall.
Guess what happened.
CRASH!
Harry, Ron, Hermonie, and McGonnagal stared at Sally, banging his head against the wall.
"Well, at least Calvin's not here to torture him and make it worse." Ron said.
Heh, heh. Calvin was far from done torturing Sally.
Sally began running around in cricles.
He stepped on a net that Calvin had placed on the rug.
TWANG!
"YAAAAH!" He screamed, struggling against the net. "THE EVIL MR BLUEBIRD HAS ME TRAPPED! HE-ULP! HE-ULP!"
As an added bonus Calvin put an electrocution charm on the net.
ZZZZZT!
"YEEK! MR BLUEBIRD IS PECKING ME! PECKING ME! BACK! BACK!"
You think Calvin had stopped there?
Nope.
The next horrible thing his did was that he had the net attached to the ceiling fan. And the ceiling fan was attached to the ceiling by one puny thread.
The thread snapped.
First Sally crashed to the floor. Then the fan fell on top of him. Then part of the ceiling fell onto him. Then a stuffed bluebird doll fell on top of all that.
Sally exploded from the wreckage, screamed like a deranged Mackmal, and flew out of the castle, all the time screaming his head off about Mr Bluebird coming to haunt him, or some such nonsense.
Harry, Ron, and Hermonie watched.
"Ya know." Ron said. "He was the first Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher that didn't have something dreadfully horrible happen to him."
"Yeah, but it was the same year Calvin was here." Hermonie said.
"I stand corrected." Ron said.
McGonnagal rolled her eyes, and left.
Harry, Ron, and Hermonie watched Sally run around in circles screaming his head off.
Harry thought he would never see Sally again.
Heh, heh.
The stupidity of Sally was just beginning!
Calvin and Hobbes rocketed home.
When they reached the house in America, Calvin bolted into his front window.
They found the duplicates playing cards.
"What are we gonna do with them?" Hobbes asked.
"I dunno." Calvin said, rubbing his chin. "Let's just put them in the Duplicator, and delete them."
"Obvious."
Calvin had to deal with a whole bunch of screaming, but they finally undid the duplicates.
After Calvin and Hobbes got rid of the clones, Calvin wiped sweat from his brow, and sat down on his bed.
"What an adventure, huh buddy?" Calvin asked.
"Uh huh."
"We learned magic, we saved some godfather, got attacked by Mackmals. WOW!"
"Uh."
"Almost makes our other adventures seem tame."
"Uh."
"Well, nighty night, Hobbes."
"It's still morning."
Too late, Calvin was already asleep.
"Huh boy." Hobbes sighed, shaking his head.
Calvin was dreaming about his experience at Hogwarts.
Plus he was complaining about how on Earth could someone name that place after a Hog's warts?
Well it was a wonderful dream to say the most.
Suddenly, his eyes drifted open.
He yawned, and sat up.
The dream he had was wonderful and... math homework?
Calvin was sitting at his desk.
Holding a pencil.
Staring down at a math homework sheet.
But he was in his bed. How could he...
Calvin looked at the calender.
August 3rd.
Uhhhh...
Calvin hadn't dreamed his experience at Hogwarts.
Had he?
"HOBBES!" Calvin called. "OH HOBBES!"
Hobbes came into Calvin's room.
"Si'?" He asked.
"Quick Hobbes!" Calvin yelled. "Did we go on a terrible horrible adventure where we went to a school, learned magic, met Harry Potter, beat up insane teachers, saved some guy with a bad hairdo, and fought Voldemort?"
Hobbes stared at Calvin.
"Calvin, you really should stop putting all that sugar on that cereal." He said, finally.
And with that, he left the room.
Calvin's eyes drifted back down to his math homework.
Had he dreamed it? It had seemed pretty real to him!
Calvin stared at his math homework for a long time, trying to figure out what had happened.
It was then that he spotted a small book on his desk.
He picked it up and stared at it.
The Solution Book
HUH!
Calvin stared at the book in his hands.
A wide grin spread across his face.
He didn't know what had happened, but he knew that he had helped someone.
He put his Solution Book down, and finished up his math homework.
Then he ate all his Mom's food without gagging once. And he was a perfect angel for the rest of his life.
Yeah right.
That's a slight exaggeration.
Calvin did, in fact, gag on his mother's cooking, and he wasn't a perfect angel for the rest of his life.
But it's the thought that counts, right?
Never mind.
Let's just say that Calvin was happy and content about the state of the world.
Until that is, that Miss Wormwood gave him a D minus for getting answers wrong, and for doodling on the sides of the paper.
Oh forget it.
That night, while Calvin was in bed, a white snowy owl sat on Calvin's mailbox, and watched Calvin sleep.
Calvin's eye opened a crack, and he stared out at the owl.
It tilted its head, and stared at Calvin with its big owl eyes.
It winked at him.
He grinned, and waved.
"Tell Harry, I said goodnight." He whispered.
And with that, he closed the drapes, to get a well deserved night's rest.
The End
Swing123: Many of you offered suggestions for the story, such as Calvin and Hobbes going to Hogsmede, and more insanity.
These suggestions were not put in this story. However, In the future, I may make a sequel to this story and include more Sally, and your suggestions.
However, don't expect this sequel any time soon. I had such a hard time keeping this story going, I'm probably not going to make any more Harry Potter stories in the near future. But I do plan to make a sequel someday, and it will be posted on the site when I have other stories completed, and when the story itself is done, so there won't be any long pauses between chapters.
I hope you have enjoyed my Calvin and Hobbes/Harry Potter crossover and that you will join me again when I write CALVIN AND HOBBES GO TO HOGWARTS II.
Thank you for reading.