A play date sounded like a great idea when she had arranged it. The littlest girls playing with a couple of friends, the mothers sitting in the drawing room for tea; it all sounded like such a good idea. And suddenly, there she was, her face hurting from the fake smile she had plastered on her features all afternoon.

The children got on very nicely. They rushed to the nursery to play with dolls and color pictures, nothing but smiles and giggles joining them. Maria smiled at how happy Marta and Gretl looked to have their friends over, and their happiness was what gave her the strength to keep smiling and bite her tongue when her new acquaintances said something she disagreed with.

She knew the three women, who were her current company, fairly well. Two of them were mothers of the children, and the third young lady, who was probably close to her own age she thought, was the sister of one of the mothers. Maria had gone to her bridal brunch a couple months ago, and the wedding was set for the week before Christmas. She had many questions about the significance of the wedding date, how they met, so many things that she was curious about, but she didn't want to ask. She was afraid to get too personal with anyone, as she was even more afraid of them wanting to get too personal with her. Instead, she tried to keep to more topical conversations, safe ones.

"Mia, are you excited about your wedding? It's terribly close!" Maria poured the young lady another cup of tea, receiving a smile.

"Oh yes, I'm very excited. I do hope you and the Captain will be in attendance?"

"Of course, we wouldn't miss it."

"But, Mia, dear, are you ready for the wedding night?" Her sister piped in with a smirk, as if she knew how red her face would become at the question. She nodded, taking a sip of her tea. "Well you'd better be. The first time with a man is always a disaster."

"Oh, yes. And so painful!"

"The worst! And they get so much joy from it all. I've never been able to decide what all the fuss is about." Maria listened to the ladies chatting, continuing to smile and remain silent. Mia appeared to be sufficiently embarrassed, and looked quite afraid by the stories they were being told. It was a wonder they were married at all, given their lack of enjoyment in their husbands, Maria thought. "Maria, how about you?"

"I beg your pardon?" She knew what they were asking, she simply needed a moment longer to decide her answer.

"What was your first time like?" She maintained her smile, as well as her composure, the best she could.

"It was fine." She took a sip of her tea, and the two women began to laugh.

"What kind of answer is that?"

"The only kind I'm afraid you'll get from me on the subject." One of the ladies groaned in response, placing her tea upon the table.

"Well in that case, I'm going to check on the girls. Perhaps you can fill Mia in on what it's like to be a newlywed." The second mother joined her, and Maria was left with the soon-to-be bride, enjoying their silence and their tea. Her first instinct was to allow Mia to talk if she pleased, otherwise, she intended to sit in silence. However, the look of fright on the young lady's face made her feel inclined to help.

"Does your sister often ask such personal questions?" Mia laughed, looking up to meet her eyes.

"I'm afraid so. She knows how nervous I am about my wedding night, and she can't help herself." Maria nodded, not necessarily impressed by her sister at the moment. While she didn't have any siblings of her own, she didn't think it was very kind to embarrass one's sister in unfamiliar company. She truly only accepted the play date for the children.

"Is your fiancé gentle with you now?"

"Yes, quite gentle."

"Then there's no reason to fear he won't be on your wedding night, right?" Mia nodded, sighing a bit. She seemed terribly conflicted.

"That's very kind of you to say." Maria smiled, taking another sip of her tea, yet she noticed a hesitation with her companion.

"But...?" Mia looked up quickly, a shy smile upon her face.

"Well, I don't know that I'm worried so much about him being gentle enough. I think I'm more concerned that I will have no idea what to do."

"Oh, I see." Maria knew that feeling quite well. It had taken her a while to become confident in her actions when it came to Georg. "Has he ever been with a woman?"

"He's never been married before."

"That wasn't my question though, was it?" She smiled when Mia blushed, and it occurred to her that her company had likely never had someone to discuss such things with. Her sister obviously was not very helpful to her.

"I don't know."

"You haven't talked about it?"

"No, I'm nervous to ask." Maria smiled, moving to sit next to the girl and place a hand upon her back in comfort. She looked like she needed it.

"You know, if you could get comfortable with exploring those conversations with him, you may find yourself less nervous about it all." She blushed again, looking to her lap.

"I don't even know how to ask."

"Simply ask." She shrugged, smiling when she received a doubtful look.

"That's easy for you, you knew your husband had a wife before you."

"Yes, and many women before her. He was a bit of a cad."

"Then how did you...I mean, you were going to be a nun. Didn't it all frighten you?" Maria sighed, thinking about what exactly she wanted to share. She was still extremely guarded when it came to the friends she was making, which she supposed was why she had made none at that point.

"I suppose it did a bit..." She thought back to why she wasn't terrified her first time. She likely should have been, she thought, but she had been teased and turned on for days leading up to it, so perhaps her level of desire was what helped with her nerves.

"But...?" Maria met her eyes and smiled at her own tone being turned around in her. The girl seemed timid, but she could tell there was a very quick-witted young woman hiding inside.

"Well, there was a sizable amount of flirting on my husband's part. He had me quite ready by our first time."

"What do you mean by that?" Maria felt her own face flushing at the question.

"Do you perhaps have a friend or family member you would prefer to ask these things?" Mia looked embarrassed, taken aback.

"I'm so sorry, I was only..."

"No, I don't mean it like that at all. I just mean, wouldn't you rather talk with someone closer to you than me? I may give you terrible advice." She smiled, trying to ease the girl's mind. In reality, she had reached the end of her own comfort zone with the conversation. She wasn't sure how well she would do if she tried to continue.

"You've met my sister. I'm afraid she's my closest friend." Maria nodded, expecting such with how shy she was. "I promise I can keep a confidence, if that's what you're afraid of. I'm told you're quite secretive."

"Really?"

"Yes. You're also a bit intimidating, I must admit." Maria laughed at her words, unbelieving of them. Certainly it was only her connection to Georg that made her say such a thing.

"I don't know about that. It's just a bit difficult for me to make friends." She left it at that, not wanting to tell her how she really felt about their social circle.

"What did you mean by your husband having you "ready" for your first time?" Maria sighed, biting her lip as she weighed the thought of really having that conversation.

"Um...well, you know, um." She looked to the ground, smiling a bit at her own reaction. No matter how experienced she was in the subject, it was still difficult for her to discuss with anyone who wasn't Georg. "Okay, you know when you're kissing him and you feel warm or fluttery in your stomach?"

"Yes."

"And warm a bit...lower, perhaps?" Mia blushed fiercely, nodding in a bashful way. "That's what I mean by ready."

"But ready how?"

"Oh, like...that's just being turned on. Your body is getting ready, you know?" She shook her head, and Maria nearly rolled her eyes. She knew that she had been insanely naive when it came to men, and even more clueless when it came to making love, but even she had known the dynamics of it all. "Do you know where everything goes?"

"Oh yes, I'm sorry. I just don't know what I'm supposed to feel, how I'm supposed to act." She sighed, meeting Maria's eyes finally. Maria smiled softly, doing her best to make her feel safe. "Does it hurt badly?"

"It does hurt the first time, but only for a moment. The more you can relax and take it slow, the less it will hurt."

"What does it feel like?"

"Oh, um...well, I suppose I can't really remember the pain now. Once it stops, it only feels good." She knew her face was bright red, her heart was pounding. Mia smiled as she noticed.

"I'm sorry to embarrass you, Baroness." She laughed a bit, sitting up straighter as she gathered her composure.

"You should really call me Maria if we're sharing such things."

"Thank you. I've never had a real friend before."

"Me neither, really. We could try it out?" Mia smiled, finally seeming to loosen her grip on her dress she had since they all sat down.

"I would like that. Though, I do have one more question. You say it feels good. Like how? What's the whole point of it all?"

"Oh dear..." She laughed, clasping her hands upon her lap. She tried channeling Hede for support, wondering what her outgoing and incredibly uninhibited sister-in-law would do. She shook her head, Hede would've probably offered to show the poor girl.

"Is that an okay question?"

"It will be more exciting when it happens, I assure you. You don't want to be surprised?"

"Not at all! I like to know what to expect." Maria smiled, willing to try. She looked to the doorway to make certain they were truly alone.

"Well, the whole point is to have fun and feel pleasure."

"For my husband, but what do I do?"

"No, darling, for you too."

"My sister says..."

"Don't listen to her. It's about both of you finding pleasure." She thought for a moment that she shouldn't have spoken negatively about her sister, but the girl needed to know there were other ways of thinking.

"What pleasure though? This is what I mean, I don't understand the point."

"The point is to...peak, um...to have an orgasm." She tried to sound confident, but she wasn't entirely sure the word had ever fallen from her lips.

"Why? What's that?" Maria looked to the sky for help. She supposed it may be some kind of preparation for the talks she would inevitably have with her daughters, but she had no idea what to say. She certainly hoped their talks wouldn't be like this!

"You're trying to see me faint."

"No, I'm so sorry!" They laughed, and Maria reached for her tea, her mouth feeling dry.

"It's a building of...heat. I suppose that's the only way I can describe it. As you move together, heat begins to burn inside, until it's nearly unbearable. And then it explodes, and it feels like...well sometimes it feels so amazing that you lose control of your body."

"You feel that too, not just him?"

"Yes, of course. It isn't only about him, it's about the two of you together."

"Is it always like that, every time?"

"Well, no, not every time. Probably not your first time. Sometimes you're merely there for the connection, for the love you feel." She hesitated, knowing it was over the line, but she felt a sense of need to help. She wished she had someone in her life she could have spoken to about such things when she needed advice on the subject. "Have you ever explored yourself?"

"No, like how?" Maria smiled at her enthusiasm, biting her lip. Then suddenly Mia's eyes widened as she caught on. "Oh goodness, how shameful! I couldn't."

"Shameful? It's quite nice." She took another sip of her tea, placing the empty cup and saucer upon the table.

"No, really? I don't think I could."

"Just close your eyes and learn what you like. Then you can guide your husband if he needs it." She shrugged, wishing she had chosen something a bit stronger to drink, just for the added courage. She felt a trickle of anxiety induced sweat drip down her back.

"I've never heard someone speak so openly about such things. You've really been so helpful to me, Maria." She laughed, smiling to her new friend.

"I'm absolutely dying of embarrassment right now." Mia joined in her laughter, and Maria sighed to relax herself, standing from her place upon the sofa. "I'm glad I could be of help. I hope you feel less anxious about it all."

"Yes, I certainly do." Mia joined her in standing, placing her tea upon the table as well. "I'm supposed to remind my sister of a dinner reservation."

"I wonder what's keeping them." They chatted a bit more as they walked upstairs toward the nursery. Maria sensed an ease in her new friend, as if she had let her inhibitions go for the moment, and she was so glad she could help. It wasn't often that she was the one offering advice rather than needing it, so she felt a sense of pride.

As they approached the hall to the nursery, they heard the other two women chatting outside the door. Maria slowed her steps as she heard her name, not exactly being used in a flattering way. They were discussing her home, her children, sounding a bit envious of her life. It didn't feel right to her; she didn't feel like she was anything particularly special, after all. Though apparently they didn't either, it seemed.

"I'm told she's a mountain girl. Of course she would throw herself at the Captain after seeing this lifestyle."

"I thought that too. It also helps that he's a gorgeous man." They laughed, trying to keep quiet enough.

"We've been up here a while. Do you think your idea worked then?"

"Of course. Leaving Mia with a former whore is the perfect way to prepare her. Maria has no friends, she'll be desperate enough to make one." She felt foolish, playing right into their game like they knew she would. She turned to meet Mia's eyes, who was clearly shocked as well by the conversation they had overheard. It was alarming that she had invited them into her home, only to be insulted and used.

It didn't happen often, but her first reaction was anger. Where she would have typically felt like crying and running, she felt a flame of rage burning within. They didn't know her at all, had no idea what kind of woman she was. She waited a moment, doing her best to keep herself calm. Mia touched her arm in comfort, and she met her eyes. She merely shrugged, nodding toward her sister's direction.

"This is your home. Let them have it then." Maria knew it probably wasn't in her best interest, but she couldn't see far past her anger as she rounded the corner and met the women. They seemed surprised by her appearance.

"I assume you've checked on the girls?" They nodded, not at all seeming affected by the fact that they had been disrespectfully chatting about her only moments before.

"Yes, they're quite well. We were simply..."

"Leaving Mia to learn from a whore?" She finished her sentence, met with the wide eyes of her guests. The woman who said the hateful words placed a hand to her chest, stepping forward a bit.

"I do apologize that you heard that."

"My children could have heard that."

"I'm sorry. I just...given your reputation, I thought Mia could learn some things."

"Given my reputation..." She looked to the ground, growing more and more exhausted by the day by the way the people in their circle saw her. "Remind me what exactly that is again? I've heard many versions of it by now."

"Please, Maria, forgive us." She crossed her arms, looking them over.

"I see then. Too cowardly to discuss sex with your little sister, too cowardly to tell me the things you've heard about me...other than the well-known nonsense of my being a whore, of course. I'm afraid cowardice is quite an unappealing quality."

"We are terribly sorry."

"So I've heard. I believe you ladies have dinner reservations and must be going. Franz will show you out." She walked away to find Franz, leaving Mia with a pat on the arm as she passed her. She was finished being polite to those who couldn't give her the same respect.

xxxxxxxxxx

"Complete, intolerable, cowardly, ignorant..."

"Maria..."

"Bitches! They're the absolute worst! I cannot believe I let them into our home, invited them even." She paced around Georg's study, having interrupted him as soon as her company left, after a quick check on the children, of course. "The children get along so well, I had assumed the adults could too!"

"Please stop yelling, darling. I have such a headache." She met his eyes, giving a small smile. He did look quite disheveled, exhaustion written across his features.

"I'm sorry, I just barged in here without even thinking." She walked closer to him, moving around the desk to stand behind him, beginning to massage his shoulders. He groaned at the release of tension, his head falling as he tried to relax.

"I'm nearly finished with all of this." She leaned down and placed a kiss to the back of his neck, continuing to rub the tender places she was finding through his shirt, his jacket having been discarded long before.

"You've said that many times."

"I really mean it. Soon enough I'll be able to pass this all off." She pressed harder into his shoulders, hearing a sharp intake of breath from him. "And then perhaps we can talk about taking a family trip?"

"Really? It would be lovely to spend some time together. Where would we go?"

"I'm not sure yet. It'll be after Christmas, for certain though. We have time to think." She wrapped her arms around him, giving him a hug from behind.

"I'll ask the children what they think. They may have some good ideas."

"That sounds perfect." She moved a bit to place a gentle kiss upon his lips, pulling away with a frown.

"Darling, you taste like you've been drinking all day."

"Just a bit as I work." She noticed his face was flushed, his pupils dilated slightly.

"How much is just a bit?"

"I assure you, there is no reason to worry. It helps me relax while I work." She nodded, not wanting to push the subject and lead to an argument, as it most definitely would.

"I suppose we'll see you at supper then?" He nodded, and she gave him another quick kiss before leaving to find the children. Perhaps playing a silly game would ease her tension.