She felt hands all over her, hot and gripping at her nightgown, pushing it up her legs. She smelled alcohol, so strong in the air, she nearly felt drunk herself. Needy hands caressed her skin, and she quickly opened her eyes as Georg began to rub her through her panties, his wet kisses all over her neck. She sighed as his teeth grazed her throat.

"What are you doing?" She whispered into the darkness of the room as his fingers slid beneath the fabric of her panties, stroking her sensitive skin.

"Waking you." She chuckled, running a hand through his hair as he continued to kiss her neck. She had gone to bed hours ago, assuming it would be another night that he wouldn't join her until she was already well asleep. She supposed it was, but it was rare that he roused her upon coming to bed.

"I hope you'll do more than just wake me." He pushed a finger inside of her, and she bit her lip in anticipation, shivering at his soft touch. He had been distracted enough by his work that they hadn't been intimate much as of late. Christmas had come and gone, as well as the new year, and she hoped he would have at least been finished with his project by then.

"I do have plans." She smiled as he thrust his finger into her again, beginning to set a pace. He kissed her upon the lips, sloppy and wet, and she nearly pulled away. It was very clear that he was incredibly drunk, and she was taken aback by his state. His kiss didn't feel like him at all.

"Georg, you're smashed." He kissed down her neck again, and she couldn't stop the sigh from escaping her lips as his fingers worked magic between her legs. She was impressed that even while drunk, his hands knew exactly what she needed.

"Just a bit." His words were mumbled against her skin; that was always his answer. He kissed her cheek slowly, and suddenly his hand stopped moving altogether. Breathing heavily, she didn't move for a moment, his body heavy atop her own.

"Georg?" She turned to face him, finding that he had passed out, completely cold. She scoffed, pulling his hand out of her panties and tossing it away from her, completely offended. She gave him a shove for good measure, but he remained heavy in the middle of the bed. "You stupid man."

She crossed her arms over her chest, biting her lip in frustration. Why even bother waking her, she wondered. Had he really had so much to drink that he couldn't function? It was the damn project he was working on, she knew it. He was so frustrating to her, doing something he knew was dangerous, and then drinking himself into oblivion every night because of it. He was an absolute mess.

Groaning at the tense throbbing he left between her legs, she reached a hand into her panties and began rubbing circles against herself. Closing her eyes, she imagined it was her husband, his mouth moving on her, his tongue flicking against her until she could hardly breathe. It didn't take long, she knew exactly the movements that would get her there, as her body convulsed, her stomach muscles tightening and her toes curling with pleasure. She sighed, her fingers moving until the heat subsided, until she was completely satisfied. Her body was satisfied, yet her mind never seemed to be.

She opened her eyes to look at her husband, unmoving and uncaring as he began to snore. Of course she was wide awake. She rolled her eyes, removing her hand from between her legs and going to use the bathroom. Squinting her eyes at the light as she entered, she wondered what exactly it was that her husband needed to do with his work. Why him? He was a smart man, she knew that, but she had to wonder if there was really no one else who could do what he was doing. Surely he wasn't the only one willing to help.

Washing her hands, she looked at her reflection in the mirror. Bare-faced, she used to feel she looked like a child, but suddenly she looked exhausted, dark circles beneath her eyes and her freckles tamed from being indoors for months. Winter always made her feel blue, but the added stress of worrying about her husband was taking its toll on her. He drank way too much, as was again made clear when he passed out on top of her moments before. When he wasn't locked away in his study, he wasn't with his family at all. His body was there, but his mind was completely absent as he simply stared at the space before him, a glass of anything alcohol-related in his hand.

She went back to the bedroom and looked him over, wondering on which side of the bed she would have the most room. He was directly in the middle, and she knew he would be unmovable for her alone. She began to take off his socks, glad he at least had removed his jacket and tie somewhere, probably left in his study. As she crawled onto the bed to remove his pants, she felt his keys shifting heavily in his pocket. Removing the keys, she unbuckled his pants and pulled them down his legs, deciding that would have to do, as there was no way she could remove his shirt for him. She unbuttoned the top buttons on his shirt for good measure, picking up his keys and moving to place them upon his bedside table.

She looked at the keys in her hand, several of them on a small ring. She knew what most of them were for, having a matching set of her own that she continuously lost about the house, but would never tell her husband that. There were a few keys she didn't have though, and she knew they mostly belonged to locks on the desk in his study, another for a safe he had in their closet. It wasn't her business, she knew, but as she held the warm metal in the palm of her hand, she was more than curious about the things hidden in his desk drawers. He was her husband, his business was her business.

Biting her lip, she looked at him once more. He was not going anywhere anytime soon, it was obvious, but she also didn't want to break their trust. Of course she trusted him, she had never trusted anyone the way she did him, but it wasn't about that. She desperately wanted to know what it was that had been distracting her husband from the people he loved, from her. Without another thought, she grabbed her robe and began making her way to his study.

As she tied a bow at her waist, she placed her hands in the pockets with the keys. Her bare feet padded against the cold marble floors, and she instantly regretting not taking a moment to put on her slippers. Doing her best not to think about what she was doing, she hummed to herself as she descended the stairs to his study, suddenly a much longer walk than she remembered it to be. She knew he was keeping things from her to protect her, but she needed to know what he was protecting her from.

She supposed she didn't even have to ask, she knew he was protecting her from what the Nazis would do to her if she knew anything. It had become obvious that he was doing something foolish that could even prove to be fatal for them if he was caught. She shook her head, shivering a bit at the idea. She wasn't sure their enemies would much care if she knew anything or not; they would have no mercy regardless. She had heard about the senseless violence happening in Germany, seeming to creep into Austria here and there. She had heard about family businesses being burned to the ground, women being raped and beaten in the streets. In all honesty, particularly given how vocal her husband had been about his political views, she was extremely afraid for the future of their family.

The children had been asking her more and more questions about the things going on in their country lately. Friends from school would share something they heard from their parents, or even something from a newspaper article could raise a question. They knew better than to ask their father, and every time she reassured them that there was nothing to worry about, she felt a lump in her throat at the lie. There were many things to worry about. She prayed endlessly for an answer, for some kind of guidance through the tough times ahead. She knew in her heart that Georg would do anything and everything to protect her and their children, but who would protect him?

She sighed as she sat down at his desk, turning on the small lamp. She felt nervous sitting in his chair, in a place where she knew she didn't belong, and she nearly lost her nerve. She tried a few keys before she finally found the one that unlocked his bottom drawer, the drawer she knew housed his secrets. She held her breath as she opened the drawer, slowly for no reason other than the suspense of it all, she supposed.

The drawer was nearly empty, aside from a few file folders and what appeared to be a book of some sort. One of the file folders was full of plans for U-boats, which she quickly knew she would not understand a thing about, and she placed it back where she found it. Another folder had several sheets of paper, handwritten with no spaces between the lines. Brow furrowed, she couldn't make out anything on the page. She saw a word in English, one in German, one in French...it appeared that whatever was written on the pages was written in several different languages, mixed together. No wonder he spent so much time concentrating, she thought, it would take a scientist to decipher the formula before her.

She looked up for a moment, noticing their framed wedding photo on his desk. A smile graced her lips as she looked at their happy faces. He was so sweet to her then, before the real darkness had begun to look over their lives, and she was overwhelmed with love for the man in the photo. The one in her bed at the moment was not the same man...but he was still her husband, and she loved him unconditionally. And when all was said and done, she trusted him completely.

"What am I doing?" She whispered to herself as she returned the folders to the drawer, locking it before she stood to leave. She looked down to the calendar upon the desk, noticing that he had her name written on her birthday. She didn't even remember telling him when it was, which made her smile. She was sure to leave everything the way she found it and lock the door behind her, pocketing the keys once more as she ascended the stairs to their bedroom.

She didn't know what she had expected to find in his study. It wasn't as if she was going to open a file folder and something jump out to tell her all the exact details of what was going on, after all. She did wonder about Franz quite often, though. She wondered if he would have known exactly what to look for if he had access to her husband's files, what he would be able to do with them. The man made her skin crawl every time she saw him anymore. There were so many things going on in his head, she could see the wheels turning, and it frightened her.

She tossed her robe upon the foot of the bed, climbing in and covering Georg with the blanket. He was incredibly warm, and she placed her chilled feet against his legs. If he had awakened her only to leave her to her own devices, she wasn't against using his body heat for her own. It didn't take her long to drift to sleep, frustrated, but for the moment, safe.

xxxxx

"Maria."

"Hmm..."

"Maria." He shook her shoulder, jolting her from sleep. She groaned, leaning upon her elbows as she met his face, her eyes heavy and her voice sharp from interrupted sleep.

"What?"

"Where are my keys?" She shook her head, bringing a hand to rub her face. "They were in my pocket when I came to bed, I know they were."

"Yes, I undressed you..."

"I know I put them in my pocket." He searched the bed, lifting covers from her and causing her to shiver.

"Stop it, I have them."

"Oh, thank goodness." He sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I couldn't remember coming in here last night."

"Hmm, well, I wish I could say the same." She laid her head back against the pillow, sighing. Her body felt heavy, the lack of a proper sleep making it difficult to awaken. She knew she would have to wake the children for school soon, but her body was uncooperative at the moment.

"What do you mean? Did I wake you?" She scoffed, rolling upon her back and stretching her legs.

"Yes, with some intention, I'm afraid."

"You mean I came on strong?" She laughed, meeting his eyes incredulously.

"That's putting it mildly. You passed out with your hand in a very...intimate place of mine." He raised his eyebrows, completely taken aback.

"How intimate?"

"Extremely." His eyes widened, and she laughed again at his surprise. "You really remember none of that?"

"No, I don't. I apologize, darling. That is such terrible behavior."

"It's alright, I forgive you."

"But to leave you bereft..."

"You imply that you're the only one in this room who can bring me pleasure." Stunned, he met her eyes in question. She gave him a sweet smile before sitting up next to him, rubbing a hand over his back. "I'm more concerned about the drinking."

"It helps me..."

"Relax? You were so relaxed last night you nearly crushed me." He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close to place a kiss upon her temple, taking in the scent of her hair.

"I overdid it last night."

"You've been overdoing it quite a lot these days." He sighed, but she didn't allow him to speak before continuing. "You're a completely different person when you're drinking like that. Your eyes are different, it's like I don't even know you."

"I know. I know it's becoming a problem."

"Then stop. Please stop all of it."

"This project...I have to finish it. I'm so close." She bit her lip, wishing she knew the magic words to say to him to make him stop.

"I'm so afraid, Georg." He pulled back a bit, meeting her eyes in question.

"You have nothing to be afraid of, darling. Why are you afraid?" She shook her head, her eyes boring into his, begging him to understand.

"I'm afraid about what this is doing to you, to us. I'm afraid about what would happen to you if..." She couldn't continue, but knew she didn't need to. He nodded in understanding, placing a gentle kiss upon her lips. "I went to your study last night."

"I wondered since you have my keys." He didn't sound angry at all, almost as if he knew she would one day lose her patience with it all.

"You know I don't understand what I saw, but I do understand that it must be dangerous if it's so heavily coded like that."

"I'm assisting the English navy. They want inside information about some of the men in our circle, and I have been quite successful in obtaining said information." She bit her lip, unsure if she really did want to know the details.

"That must be why we've been quite the social couple lately. I wondered why we've gone to so many parties, just so you could sit alone and brood. You're busy listening." He nodded, sighing as he held her tightly.

"There's one man left that I need information on, but he hasn't shown up to the last two parties."

"And then you'll be finished?"

"Yes, I will be completely finished."

"What kind of information?"

"I can't say. I shouldn't have said this much."

"I'm your wife. Even if it means lying or hiding something for you, you know I would." He kissed the top of her head, holding her close.

"I know you would. But I would never ask or expect you to be in that position." She kissed him, giving a soft smile before standing from the bed and putting on her robe. "I feel that I'm doing the right thing, a good thing. Austria is moving in the right direction. I just know it."

"It is?" He nodded, a small smile gracing his lips. She was concerned he was going mad, as he really appeared to believe everything he had said. She tried to return the smile, stepping forward to place his keys in his hand. "I'd better wake the children."