She had no idea where he was, she hadn't seen him since they returned home from the party the night before. He had hardly said a word to her before he disappeared to his study, so she went to bed, assuming he would join her soon enough, but he never did. Her heart pounded with anxiety in her chest as she showered and dressed for her day, wracking her brain for all the possible places he could have gone. He couldn't have gone far, she thought.
He was obviously upset with her, that much she knew, but she couldn't begin to fathom why. She had been nothing other than kind, poised, and as likable as she could have been at the party. Not to mention, her level of patience with him the past months had been astounding. And he had been in a decent enough mood the entire evening, but when they left for home, he was a completely different person. She would have thought someone had simply offended him at the party, but he would have told her that, right? He would have likely spend the entire car ride home complaining if that were the case. The way he could hardly look at her, wouldn't even acknowledge her when she spoke to him; he was very obviously upset with her.
She roused the children from their rooms, walking down to breakfast with them as the day began. Her heart sank a bit when Georg wasn't sitting in his seat. She had very much expected him to be waiting for the rest of the family to join him, but she didn't see a trace of him at all. She couldn't imagine he would have left home without telling her, no matter what she may have done to anger him...whatever it even could have been. She was so terribly confused, but she didn't want to raise alarm.
"Franz, have you seen the Captain?" The butler entered the dining room and began setting their breakfast and drinks upon the bar. He looked at her, and she could tell he would have preferred never having to speak to her again in his life, but he maintained his manners. She had no idea what she had ever done to him either! Aside from continually making things very difficult for him to spy, she supposed.
"I have not, Baroness. Should I make him a plate and save it back?" She sighed, wishing he had at least seen her husband.
"No, thank you. I'll make him a plate if he doesn't join us. Perhaps he's hiding away in his study." Franz nodded, retreating back to the kitchen while the children began filling their plates, Maria helping Gretl and Marta with theirs before filling her own.
The children chattered throughout breakfast in a carefree fashion, not at all seeming alarmed that their father was missing. She had done her best not to act worried herself, so she supposed she was getting better at lying, in any case. Though it was not her favorite thing to do, especially to the children.
"Mother, may we kick a ball around the ballroom after breakfast? We miss playing outside." The weather was still too cold for outdoor games, and the children had all grown restless after months of being stuck indoors. She had to admit, she felt the same way.
"Of course, Kurt. But please don't break any windows. Your father's head may very well explode." They chuckled, and she gave them a reassuring smile. "It is the weekend, after all. We should enjoy ourselves. What will the rest of us do today?"
The children gave their answers, some wanting to paint or draw, others preferring to read, Liesl asked for a lesson on the guitar. Everything was completely normal and ordinary, except for the missing head of their family. Maria agreed to join them in their activities once she located their father and made sure he had breakfast.
She filled a plate for Georg, adding all of his usual breakfast foods and pouring him a glass of orange juice, and the children ran off to decide how they wanted to spend their Saturday. She decided to try his study, the only room in the house that she could think of him using as an escape. It was his own space, so surely he felt he could go there to sort out his mind. However, when she entered the study, hands full with his breakfast, she found a sight that she was not expecting.
The room was hot and felt stale, the door obviously hadn't been opened in quite a while. Georg's coat lay over the back of a chair, his tie along with it, but she found him seated upon the couch across the room when she entered. He was staring intently at the fireplace, watching the flames crackle and burn as he held a glass of something dark and menacing in his hand.
"What do you want?" His voice was harsh, brooding and dripping with frustration. Maria nearly retreated back to the safety of the hall, but she decided against it. She was truly glad to see his face, no matter the tone with which he was speaking.
"I've brought you breakfast." She placed the food upon a side table, and he looked at it with disgust before meeting her eyes. The heaviness of his gaze nearly knocked her to the floor. He had never looked at her like that, so angry and full of darkness. He looked like a complete stranger to her. She had never before feared him, but suddenly she wasn't sure what to think. "You...um...you didn't come to bed last night."
"No." He didn't offer a reason, nor did he elaborate. She shrugged, bringing her hands to meet in front of her.
"It smells as if you've been drinking all night." The room smelled heavily of alcohol, and the heat made her stomach feel queasy. She wasn't sure how he was able to stand it all, or even how he hadn't passed out yet. He was very obviously, extremely intoxicated.
"I have." He finished the drink in his hand, placing the glass upon the table next to the sofa. Had he truly been swimming in his own anger toward her all night, she wondered.
"It's nine in the morning, darling. Maybe you should..."
"Don't you dare tell me what I should do!" He shouted, causing her to jump in surprise. She nodded, backing away a bit. He was making her quite nervous in his current state, and she was afraid to speak to him. After a moment of feeling herself shrink beneath his gaze, she turned to leave, reaching for the door in anticipation of being on the other side of it. It made more sense to wait until he was sober, she decided. Suddenly, the plate she brought him for breakfast soared past her head and smashed into the door, causing her to jump back at how close it had come to hitting her. She gasped as it shattered, his food flying in all directions, and she quickly looked to him in question, completely shocked. He had a scowl upon his face, pure anger coiling about him. She wasn't far behind him.
"You threw that at me?"
"I wish I hadn't missed." Her mouth fell open at his words, and she nearly burst into tears, crossing her arms over her chest in an attempt to regain her composure.
"Georg, what could I have possibly done to deserve that?"
"You act as if you have no idea!" He was on her quickly, nearly jumping up from the sofa and towering above her.
"I don't." Her words were small, soft in comparison to his booming tone.
"Some wife you are, Maria. We haven't even been married long, and already you've acted as though you're going to fuck another man, and now I find out you've been conversing with my enemies behind my back. What will I find out next?" She felt her own anger prickle at his accusation. It was clear that they were still not past his problems with her dancing with another man at a party. She thought that was far behind them.
"How dare you. I've done neither of those things!"
"No? You didn't have a secret lunch with Elsa before we married?" She felt her heart skip a beat. In all the events overshadowing her lunch with Baroness Schraeder, she had never brought it up to him. It was so long ago at that point, she had completely forgotten.
"Well, yes, but it was only lunch. It was no secret, I had intended to tell you..."
"What about your friend, Mia?"
"What about her?"
"You know her husband is working with them! He's using her to gather information." She felt her breath hitch in her throat. So that was her friend's secret.
"I suspected some things..."
"You're the one person I thought I could trust, Maria. And I find that you're a traitor." Her eyes widened in surprise. She couldn't believe he said that to her, after all they had been through together. He had really become so detached from their relationship that he couldn't see how foolishly he was behaving?
"You have got to be joking! You sound like a crazy person. Georg, I would never..."
"But you did!"
"I didn't! I was only..."
"Sharing all of our secrets with Mia?"
"Not at all!"
"Telling Elsa everything about our family so she could take it to Herr Zeller."
"Why would you think..."
"I never thought you would be so stupid to give away information about us behind my back."
"What information would..."
"Then to lie to me!"
"Georg, stop interrupting and give me a chance!" They were shouting loudly in one another's faces, anger taking them to a level they had never been. Their chests were rising and falling in a dangerous rhythm, hearts pounding from adrenaline. "It was only lunch, and I refused the invitation many times before she pulled me to the restaurant. I was very aware of her relationship with Herr Zeller, and I said nothing at all that would have put our family in jeopardy."
"What about Mia?"
"I've told her nothing! Her questions began to feel prying, so I've kept distance between us."
"I don't believe a word you say."
"You know I'm a terrible liar. And why would I lie to you?"
"To protect yourself."
"From what?"
"From the hatred I feel for you." She looked deeply into his eyes, certain he was only trying to hurt her in his drunken state, but that knowledge didn't make his words hurt any less.
"I only feel love for you." He quickly grabbed the collar of her dress in his fist, pressing her against the door by her chest. She gasped in surprise, the force of his hand causing her breathing to hitch.
"If that were true..."
"You know it's true. Take your hands off me!" She pushed at him a bit, but he only grasped tighter, his angry face inches from her own. She couldn't see her husband through the darkness in his eyes.
"You've associated with my enemies."
"Georg, stop this."
"Did they try to bring you to their side? Did they offer you anything, bribe you?" His grip tightened on her dress, and she felt claustrophobic from the tightness of the fabric against her neck.
"Not at all. Please, let go."
"Did they make you believe our country is unraveling? That the Anschluss is going to happen?"
"They didn't have to, it simply is." As soon as the words left her mouth, she knew they were a mistake. He shoved her away from him, her back hitting the door and his hands twitching in full anger.
"You traitorous bitch."
"It's nothing to do with me, you've seen the same changes I have: the flags, the soldiers, the newspapers. You're too wrapped up in yourself to notice everything unraveling around you! If you still think this isn't happening, Georg, you're only kidding yourself." She hurried to use his shock at her words to open the door and escape, rushing out of the study into the fresh air of the rest of the house. She desperately needed to get away from him, as there was no telling who he was when he was in such a state.
However, she only managed to make it a few feet outside the door before he had rushed after her, wrapping an arm around her waist and slamming her body against the wall by the entrance to his study. She cried out at the pain of her back hitting the doorframe. Tears fell from her eyes as his hand came to the base of her throat to hold her still, and she wondered if he was truly going to become abusive with her, violent even. Flashes of her childhood flickered through her mind, her uncle throwing her against a wall and hitting her with his belt until she couldn't stand, the look on his face before he slapped her out of her chair at the dinner table for saying grace.
"You think you're walking away after saying such a thing to me?"
"Darling, please..." His hand squeezed, and she heard herself whimper in fear.
"You sound ridiculous you weak, ignorant cunt! I can't stand to look at your face!"
"Please stop!" Tears were flowing freely, her hands grasping at his that still held her throat. It was becoming difficult to breathe. Without thinking past the act, she panicked and quickly shoved her knee between his legs, and he let go of her as he doubled over from the pain. She could think of nothing else to do.
Time stood still, suspended in one of those moments where actions happen so quickly that, in order to process everything, her brain had to slow it down. She tried to run away, crying out as he grasped her arm and sharply slammed her body against the wall once more. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Friedrich and Kurt had rushed out of the ballroom at the commotion, eyes widening as Georg yelled in her face and pulled his fist back with all of his strength. She heard herself shouting, begging him to stop as tears drenched her cheeks, and his fist flew toward her face. She closed her eyes and turned her head, preparing herself for the pain.
She could feel the breeze of his fist as it flew past her face, smashing into the wall next to her head and busting through it as if it were made of air. She felt drywall littering her body as she tried to move further away, bringing her hands to her head and protecting herself from the flying debris as he punched the wall over and over again. Suddenly she felt herself being pulled away, Friedrich's gentle but firm hands prying her from his father's grasp as he continued to take out his anger on the wall.
"Mother, are you alright?"
"She's fine!" Georg shouted, issuing one last punch before turning on them. Maria shivered at the look in his eyes as Friedrich stepped in front of her in protection. Kurt took her hand and began leading her up the stairs, but she couldn't take her eyes off the stranger that was her husband.
"Father, you must stop this at once." Friedrich's words were demanding, stern even. It was a tone he had heard his father use many times in the midst of discipline. Georg seemed to respond to it, stepping away and shaking his head as if he were being pulled out of a trance. He looked at his hands, his fist bleeding from his assault on the wall only moments before.
"Maria?" Georg's eyes met hers in pure panic, and he was finally her husband again, but it didn't do much to stop her body from shaking in fear. He began to cry for a moment before he swayed and hit the floor, his body succumbing to the drink as he passed out cold. Then there was pure, agonizing silence.
Maria looked to the boys, whose eyes were filled with fear, just as she knew hers were. She released Kurt's hand with a small squeeze, lightly walking toward her husband. Doing her best not to be frightened, she knelt down and placed a hand upon his cheek, feeling the warmth of his skin from his exertion.
"Mother, be careful." She nodded at Friedrich's words, but didn't stop touching him, her hands moving to loosen his collar. His heart was still pounding beneath his skin, her fingers moving against his pulse. She cleared her voice, trying to compose herself in front of the boys.
"We can't leave him here." Her voice sounded soft, a bit hollow.
"Of course we can, look what he did." She shook her head, briefly glancing to the gaping hole in the wall where her face had been only moments before. He had thankfully shown enough restraint not to hit her in the end, but he wanted to. She saw in his eyes how he wanted to, and her heart ached.
"He isn't himself. Help me move him to the drawing room." Neither of the boys moved as she tried to get her arms beneath his. She looked up to meet their eyes as they stared at her in disbelief. "Please?"
"He was hurting you."
"No, he didn't though."
"You were screaming."
"It was just an argument."
"Mother, you're being delusional..."
"Please, just help me do this." Fresh tears fell from her eyes, and she shook her head in frustration. She understood why they didn't want to help her...she didn't fully understand why she wanted to help him at the moment. "We can talk about it after, but I don't want anyone else to see him like this. Please."
The boys looked at one another, reluctantly stepping forward and helping her move Georg to the drawing room. He was extremely heavy for the three of them, especially trying to carry his full weight, so they were mostly able to gently drag him across the floor. It took a lot of strength, but they managed to finally lift him to the couch, all grasping their backs in pain as they finished. She met their eyes in thank you, but neither seemed to be pleased at having helped.
"What will happen when he wakes up?" She sighed, wishing she had been able to handle him herself and keep him away from the eyes of the children. It broke her heart that the boys saw him in that light, something they would never be able to forget.
"I suppose he'll be himself again...and incredibly remorseful." She wiped her eyes once more, fully standing as she moved to pull the boys into a hug. They quickly accepted, holding her tightly in comfort.