"I made it safely," Reyna reported as she stepped out of the car. Her eyes moved to look at the time. It was almost midnight, but she couldn't sleep. She also wanted to drive her new car that she had finally decided on. Other than the fact that she gripped her steering wheel as tightly as she could, driving went well. It helped to push back any initial fear she had about getting into a wreck.
"What are you getting? Some fast food?" Nico asked. It sounded like he was half awake.
"Not exactly. I'll be home soon, though," Reyna replied. "Get some sleep. You have a big day at the front desk tomorrow."
"I know," Nico yawned. "I actually kind of enjoy it."
"Really?" Reyna asked in surprise. She glanced up at the building that she was walking to. The brick building looked like it had been long abandoned, but lights were spilling out from the open front door. The building had no sign or name on it, but Reyna had checked the address enough times to know she was at the right building. "I didn't think you would enjoy it."
"I didn't either," Nico admitted. "But, I don't know. It's nice."
"Maybe you can ask Lupa if you can have the job permanently," Reyna suggested. She stepped inside the building and slowly looked around. The floor was made of white marble that did not match how grimy the outside looked. There were all kinds of paintings on the wall and sculptures resting on shelves.
"I might," Nico said. "How is Ian doing? Was that his dad that pulled up?"
"It was," Reyna confirmed. "I gave Ian my number in case he needed anything, and he texted me that he went home with his dad after talking to the cops. I hope it works out."
"Me too," Nico agreed with another yawn. "Alright, I'm going to bed. Wake me up when you get home."
"Are you sure?" Reyna questioned. Nico made a strange noise that sounded like a confirmation mixed with another yawn. "Fine. I'll wake you up. Get a good night's sleep."
Reyna hung up and took a deep breath. She looked around the building and saw there was another door to her right. To her left were the bathrooms and an emergency exit. In front of her, a group of people was standing in front of three statues. The statues were painted in different colors with one being gold, another silver, and the last covered in all kinds of paint like someone just spattered many mixes of colors on them.
The group of people all had notebooks like they were sketching the statues. Reyna looked around again and slowly walked toward the sketch artists. There was one woman who stood slightly off to the side. Reyna made her way towards her and glanced at the statues again.
"Um, are you Rachel?" Reyna slowly asked. She jumped as one of the statues opened its eyes, and she quickly realized that these statues were actually people.
"You must be Reyna," the woman painted in gold said. She glanced at the woman that stood off to the side. "I have to step away."
"We should be good," the woman replied. Rachel nodded and walked toward Reyna. Her green eyes looked up and down Reyna as she seemed to be examining her.
"I didn't mean to interrupt," Reyna said carefully as she eyed the woman drenched in gold paint.
"You're not interrupting," the painted woman assured. She held out her right hand. "I'm Rachel Elizabeth Dare. My hand is dry."
Reyna slowly shook Rachel's hand, carefully testing if what she said was true. After confirming that it was indeed dry, she spoke, "Do you normally cover yourself in paint this late at night?"
"I'm helping out with the local art school," Rachel replied with a shrug. "Come on."
Reyna followed Rachel towards the door marked emergency exit. She almost said something as the door was opened, and her confusion only grew as they stepped into a break room. Rachel looked at her in amusement.
"This used to be an old speakeasy, but it was raided and gutted a few decades ago. I bought it and turned it into my personal art studio," Rachel explained.
"And, you help out art students," Reyna assumed. Rachel nodded and walked towards the fridge in the corner of the room. "But, you're also a therapist?"
"My dad wouldn't pay for art school unless I got what he called a 'real degree'. I've found that a lot of artists don't know how to get their feelings out other than on a canvas. That's why I wanted to have a degree in therapy. If I can't help them with words, I'll help them with their art techniques," Rachel explained.
"I've never been good at art," Reyna commented. Rachel gave her a small smile as she opened the refrigerator door.
"Would you like anything to drink? I have some coke and water," Rachel offered.
"Just water. Thanks," Reyna answered. Rachel grabbed two water bottles and placed them on the table. She sat across from Reyna. "Um, so. How does this work?"
"However you want it to," Rachel replied. "I don't have a set blueprint to go by. Some clients start by telling me a little about themselves. Others are silent until we start to draw. I'll ask them questions about their art, and they start to open up that way. Everyone is different, though."
"You're the first therapist I ever visited," Reyna admitted after a few moments. "But, Nico said you could help me."
"Ah, Nico. Has he been doing well? I text him sometimes but haven't seen him in almost a year now," Rachel said.
"He's good," Reyna revealed. "Really good, actually. What did he come to you for? If I can ask."
"His sister," Rachel replied. Reyna nodded and frowned.
"Has he known you for that long?" Reyna wondered.
"No. He actually visited three years ago. It's something Nico has been dealing with on his own for a very long time," Rachel explained. "It was also the anniversary of his mother's death, and I think everything hit him really hard."
Reyna nodded at that. Nico didn't talk to her much about his family. Which was fair considering she didn't talk to him that much about anything. Reyna looked out the table and let out a deep breath. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. Instead, she stared ahead before a sigh finally escaped her lips.
"I don't know where to start," Reyna finally began. She sighed and rubbed her forehead and tried to keep her building frustration in check.
"May I ask some questions?" Rachel wondered. Reyna looked at her and nodded. "You said I was the first therapist that you visited. What made you decide to visit me? Nico's recommendation?"
"Kind of," Reyna replied after a few moments. She chewed her lower lip. "He gave me your card a while ago. There was just something about today that made me realize I should call you."
"What happened today?" Rachel prompted.
"There was this kid at the gym. I'm, um, a professional fighter, but my gym has these self-defense classes that we give to kids for free. I haven't been able to attend for a few months, so this was my first time back. One of the kids was waiting in the foyer and not attending class. When I checked on him…"
"I saw myself in him," Reyna continued after a few moments. "I remember he had trouble at home, and it's just the way he stood. How he stared at the window as if the answer to his problems would appear. I used to do that a lot as a kid, and I asked him what was wrong. I knew, though. I knew his mom had put her hands on him."
"As I talked to him, I could see Nico's reflection. He looked like he wanted to help, but he didn't know how to do it," Reyna explained. "I've seen that look on Nico's face before. With me. It made me realize that he has been trying to help me however he can, but he just doesn't know how to. I guess I realized that I needed to help myself before anyone could help me."
Reyna looked away from Rachel and focused on the table. She sighed again, "Everyone says that I need to stop keeping my feelings inside. The problem is that no one tells me how to do it. They make it seem easy; all you have to do is talk to someone. I can't do that. It's not easy to just look at someone and open up about my feelings and my past."
"So, you keep all of your emotions inside until you can't take it anymore? Then, it just explodes?" Rachel guessed.
"Yeah," Reyna muttered. "I'm trying not to take it out on my friends, but I just..."
Reyna hung her head and rubbed her eyebrows, "I don't know."
"That's okay," Rachel said gently. "Just coming here is the first step, but it is the most important. I don't want you to feel overwhelmed. Everyone goes at their own pace. We just have to find what yours is. Do you know why you can't open up to people?"
"I think so," Reyna replied after a few moments. She chewed her bottom lip again.
"You don't have to tell me just yet if you don't want to," Rachel reassured.
"I don't want to open up to someone, get close to them, and then have my heart broken," Reyna unveiled after a few moments. She swallowed painfully. "It's happened too much already."
"If you don't open up to someone, you can't get hurt if they leave you, right?" Rachel prompted. Reyna nodded her agreement. "But, you hurt those around you by keeping all of this inside until you snap."
"I know," Reyna whispered. "Nico has been there for me the last few years. Since high school really. I want to open up to him, but I just... my own sister told me to get out of her house one day. I left and didn't speak to her for too long. My father was crazy, and my mother..."
Reyna trailed off and felt her temper flaring up. She gripped her fists until her knuckles were white. Rachel watched her quietly and didn't press. Reyna let out a few deep breaths. She tried to reel in her anger, "I use my emotions to help push me further and further when I'm training or fighting. I haven't been able to train or fight properly for months. I don't know if that's making it worse."
"I don't know what to do," Reyna muttered as she dropped her head on the table.
"It's hard to talk and open up, right?" Rachel asked.
"Yes."
"Have you tried keeping a journal?"
Reyna slowly looked up at Rachel, "What do you mean? Like a diary?"
"Diary. Journal. Whatever you want to call it," Rachel said. "If it's hard to verbalize how you feel, especially to other people, you should write down how you feel. You don't have to give it to me or anyone else. In fact, it might help just to write it down and burn it."
"Will that really work?" Reyna asked as skepticism slipped into her tone.
"I don't know," Rachel admitted. "Everyone is different, but this is one thing that we can try. If it doesn't work, we can move on to something else."
"Okay," Reyna exhaled. "I'll try. So, I just write down anything?"
"Whatever your thoughts are at the time," Rachel confirmed. "If you can't think of anything to write or just get mad, you can scribble nonsense on the paper."
Reyna nodded. She let out a deep breath and rubbed the bridge of her nose. Rachel studied her and smiled gently, "Try it for a couple of days and see how it works. If it doesn't work, we can try something else. We can schedule another appointment if you want. Or if you want to reflect on today."
"No. Let's make another appointment. Maybe for next week," Reyna began. Rachel nodded and stood.
"Let me get my planner. We'll find an open date and time," Rachel decreed. Reyna nodded as Rachel stepped out of the room. A deep breath left her. It hadn't been as bad as she feared, but this was just the first step. But, she finally took that leap, and hopefully, Reyna could find a solid grasp on her anger.