Disclaimer: I don't own FFX. I just spend all my time envying Square-Enix.

Note: This entire piece is sarcastic. I bet if I didn't put this, someone would take it seriously.

To Make Another Terrible FFX High School Fic

Obviously, as shown by the rarity of these specimens anywhere on the web, creating a high school fanfiction featuring the Final Fantasy X cast is very, very difficult. I, however, have come up with this guide, consisting of a few simple steps required to create your very own high school fanfiction!

Step list:

Create your school districting system. This is actually fairly easy! All you need to do is take the sports districts A-East and C-South and pretend you know the entire layout and districting system of Zanarkand from that. Make sure to throw in random latin words and greek designations that are usually used in astronomy!

Pretend Zanarkand is somehow a basic , 21st century city. In America, of course. That Japan place is full of crazy bastards.

Pretend that, in a regular 21st century city, we have developed blitzball, just because it's easier than having Tidus and Wakka play sports congruous to their styles, being soccer and American football, respectively.

Cast either Yuna or Tidus as some sort of unpopular person, with the other being absurdly popular. Then proceed to ignore this division for the rest of the story, except in a few chapters where Rikku is totally out of character and judgemental, basing all her opinions of Tidus on his popularity- he's a dweeb if he's unpopular, and a serial rapist if he's popular.

Rikku is always Yuna's best friend, but is also always popular, and apparently the cheapest girl on campus, until she meets Gippal. Then she is smitten. Ah, true love in sophomore year, eh?

Wakka is Tidus' best friend, and usually pretty dweeby. He falls for the popular Lulu and suddenly becomes Don Juan's successor.

Auron is a teacher. Always. I mean it. And it just reminds you of Indiana Jones. You know, a classroom full of girls, none of whom are paying any attention to the lesson.

Lenne is a music teacher, as well as being Yuna's caretaker for some reason- sister, cousin, mother, etc. Shuyin is a blitzball coach and Tidus's caretaker, for a similar reason.

Tidus always owns a kickass ride. You could describe him as coming from a background of an orphan lifestyle, living on the street for most of his life, but damn if he doesn't own a Porsche.

Yuna goes out with Seymour for some odd reason. An acceptable alternative to this is to have her have been raped by Seymour. Tidus just needs to protect Yuna from Seymour at some point.

There's always a dance, and the entire cast always feels obligated to go. There will be no ducking out of this dance!

Example Chapter 1:

Yuna got out of her car is district Z-North Northwest Alpha Minor Z-Beta of Zanarkand where she was to go to school. She moved in a went to sleep.

(You can skip her moving in and such because it doesn't involve high school, and high school is all that matters. If it doesn't happen in high school, NO ONE CARES).

She woke up the next morning.

"Oh noes! I m suuuuu late! Oh noes!" she cries (tenses don't have to agree. Whoever told you so lied). She breaks down and weeps over her lateness, as Ynua believed punchooality (sp?) to be the most important thing in life.

(Ignore any mentions of punishments and pretend she actually got there early and has time to talk to her friend Rikku).

"Yunie! You finally moved to Zanarkand School District Z-North Northwest Alpha Minor Z-Beta!" ecslaimed Rikku with greta joy! Yuna, of course, far surpassed all of the other girls at the school in sheer beauty, smarts, and overall attractiveness, but, somehow, while the grrls jealousy is understandable, the guys hate her too.

"Get outta the way, bitch," said one boy with striking blue eyes and soft, beautiful blond hair that stuck out in every direction like a messy birds nest that had a rat living in it like the rays of the sun peaking our from behind a cloud.

"Oh, Yunie, that's Tidus. He's the star player of our blitzball team, the Abes, even though we are nowhere near A-East. I hear he's a serial rapist," said Rikku.

Yuna was completely and totally smitten, even though he had just spilled coffee all down her front and knocked her books all over the floor.

End Example Chapter 1

Well, with this kind of help, there's no way you can fail to write a successful high school fic! Now, go have fun!