Loki listens for weeks, carefully trying to gauge this Thor and who he is, why he is still coming to visit their shabby homestead, and if he is someone Loki can dare to trust. Little by little, he starts to believe what the others tell him- Thor does not intend to hurt him.
The younger Loki has spoken to Thor three times when he sits down with the older Loki and tells him that even though he doesn't know this man, he is starting to think he may have an older brother in him.
Loki stares at the young man in disbelief, "I don't dare to hope the same for myself."
"Suit yourself," Loki says, shrugging, "But he doesn't seem like somebody we need to be afraid of to me. And he seems to be making friends with everyone here. Did you see him sparring with Hunter the other day? He's holding back, you can tell, but they look like they're having a lot of fun. Maybe you should give him a chance."
"Perhaps."
He sighs, "Look, from one Loki to another, I've had good reason not to trust anybody around here for a lot of years. Mostly because there are a lot of us around here and a good lot of them are about as untrustworthy as a person can get. I had to figure out how to read somebody I knew was going to turn on me in order to get what I needed to survive. I'm pretty good at telling who's out to get something from me and then throw me away. And that's not Thor. At least not this Thor. He's sticking around because he wants to know us. You, mostly, at first, but after he found the rest of the family, he got curious. He doesn't fly back to the city because he wants to leave at the end of the day, but because he knows it's going to make us uncomfortable if he asks if he can stay here instead. You, especially, but me, too. I'm almost to the point where I'd let him. So I think you need to find a way to talk to him."
"I'll think about it."
"I know you will. That's one of the things that makes a Loki," the younger Loki says, smiling, "We do a lot of thinking. Sometimes a little too much thinking. This time, I think that might be the case for you. I mean, what can he do to us that somebody out here hasn't already tried to do, anyway?" He walks away.
The Loki that has known his brother as an adult stares at the ground, wondering what he'll find out when he builds up the courage to talk to Thor.
Thor is working with Ayshi under the car, the former archivist turned engineer as they devise a way to quickly, yet securely, attach their luggage rack to the back of the car, when Loki decides this is the day to talk. He cautiously approaches, his hands clasped, kneading his palms, as he takes slow, measured steps, still wondering if he should turn back or wait for another day.
Thor reaches for a tool he's left by the wheel and notices Loki; he waves, "Hello, Loki! We'll be done under here in just a moment." Loki nods and waits at a little bit of a distance. Thor and Ayshi finish their conversation under the car, metal groaning snug against the frame as whatever it is they are tightening eases into place. Ayshi slips out from under the car first and gathers their tools, setting them in the vehicle on the floor. Thor extracts himself with a little more difficulty, sits, and half-heartedly brushes himself off.
"So," Thor says, "I assume you've come to talk about something other than the fact that it's remarkable this car is still running?"
Loki nods and approaches, sitting just out of Thor's reach, "Indeed. Though if you've figured out how it hasn't fallen to pieces yet, I'm sure it would make for fascinating conversation."
He shakes his head, "No, I haven't, though the prevailing theory is that it must have to do with the lack of the passing of time."
"That would be reasonable," Loki says, "Or, rather, as reasonable as something can be when time itself isn't present."
They sit in silence for a moment before Thor gently nudges, "And what is it you did come here to talk to me about?"
Loki sighs, "Something I've not known how to ask."
"Oh?"
Loki fiddles with the grass at his fingertips, "They showed me clips of my life. I've been told other snippets. As though what I was when I tried to take Midgard wasn't bad enough, I know what I would become, at least in bits and pieces. And I know how horribly I was supposed to die. I saw it. I heard my bones snap and saw myself on the ground, dying, with you bowed over my body. And I saw the explosion. All this time, I thought you had died. I didn't have the courage to ask if you had, knowing it would be worse to hear it was true, that I'd lead to your death, too. Through it all...at what point did you stop seeing me as your brother? When did I finally cross the line and push you away?"
Thor shakes his head, "You didn't. I grieved you dearly, Loki, but I never lost you. Not even when I believed you would never come back to me."
"That can't be true," Loki says, his voice soft, "I...I had our mother killed. Unintentionally, yes, but-"
"Loki, stop," Thor says gently, "I never stopped hoping to have you back beside me. Not when I found out you were of Jotunheim. Not when I thought you dead. Not when everything led to the destruction of Asgard. Even after, when we I was escaping the planet with our people and I thought you gone and you came to me in what I thought was an illusion, I still told you that were you present, I would hug you. And somehow, you were, and I did."
"But how?" Loki asks. Ayshi brushes their fingers reassuringly over his shoulder as they pass by, leaving the brothers to talk alone.
"Because you're my brother and no matter how angry I was, I could never sever that bond. And yes, I was very, very angry. There was a time I believed you deserved the isolation Father handed you as your punishment for Midgard. But after your death on Svartalfheim-" he sees a look of surprise and pain creep across Loki's face, "You didn't know of Svartalfheim?"
"I know you stole me from my cell to avenge our mother's death. Cyd told me. He told me how we fought with our words, wounding in anger, on our way there, you only an inch from beating me senseless, but also beside one another and with your Midgardian friend as we stood against the creature that killed her and threatened all of existence. He said I was run through. I didn't know I died."
Thor nods, "You did. The creature, Kurse, was pummelling me fiercely. You ran it through, but it pulled you onto the pike. You were able to free yourself and activate what I think was an anti-matter grenade of some sort. Or perhaps a portal. Whatever it was, it pulled Kurse in. You died in my arms, Loki. I refuse to believe it was merely a trick. You have never been one to easily feign pain and it was no mere play at emotion." Thor's voice catches, his words soft, "I told you I would tell our father what you'd done- of your bravery and loyalty, your willingness to give everything to protect both Jane and me. Your last words were, 'I didn't do it for him.' I've never let the memory of that moment leave me, even when I discovered you were yet alive."
"And even though I'm not that person?" Loki asks.
"You both are and aren't. Your roots are the same. Your path was the same until after Midgard. You never had to suffer the way the man I watched did. Thank all that is holy in this universe you didn't."
"Do you know how I came to leave death?" Loki asks.
"No. I don't understand how you did, nor how you came to overpower our father, leave him on Earth, and take the throne for yourself in his guise. Asgard was quiet under your rule. You neglected the other realms and there was unrest and the rumblings of war, but within the narrow view of Asgard, you were king."
Loki scoffs, "Of course, only within a 'narrow view'. I never was one to see beyond myself..."
"I don't think that's entirely true," Thor says, "But in that moment as Asgard's king, you had a limited vision. I think I can understand why."
"How did you keep me close, given that? I know these actions must have accelerated his end. He died on Earth- I saw that. I heard him say he loved me, Thor. I saw the look on my own face when those words were uttered. I know to hear that struck deep, even if I don't know what that other me felt and did in the years I never were allowed to experience. To hear them, even only on a screen, brought me a peace I didn't think I could ever find. Not after that single 'no.'"
Thor reaches for his brother's hand and hesitates, unsure if this is the right thing to do, if Loki is ready. Loki slowly extends his hand. Thor waits for him. He starts to withdraw and then pauses before shaking his head and gently resting his palm against Thor's.
Thor breaks into a smile, tears sneaking into his eyes, "I love you, Loki. Please, give me a chance to prove myself to you."
Loki nods and meets his eyes, "I don't know how. But I'll try."
"Thank you."
"I know you've been talking to the younger Loki. He's lived a difficult life here, and he's been here for so long. When I first arrived here, he had additional two companions, an elder and a warrior, both other variants of myself. The warrior betrayed him and gave away the location of the place they had made their home to other Loki variants who seemed hungry for power. The elder Loki, the boy, the alligator, and myself fled, escaping thanks to the chaos that erupted amongst the other Loki variants. We met Mobius and Sylvie and made a plan to enchant Alioth- Sylvie had figured out she could. But she wasn't strong enough and the monster was going to kill us both. The child stayed on the ridge, watching, but our elder showed the strength of his sorcery to save us. Thor, he hadn't died by Thanos, disguising himself as debris of the ship and drifting to an uninhabited world to live alone for centuries. He only left, was only captured by the TVA, because he set foot off that place to come find you. He missed you so dearly. And in him telling his story, I realized that his roots were in me. I understood, and I knew I would live the rest of my life without you. That...that hurt when I first realized it. It hurt then. And when he was consumed by Alioth, Sylvie and I desperately trying to enchant the creature together while Alioth destroyed Asgard even as he tried to build it...I understood what he'd given up. And what he'd gained as the hero in our story. I owe him so much. And I knew that he made that choice with the knowledge that the child would be left with no one but his alligator friend." Thor waits patiently in case Loki isn't finished. He continues, "Loki needs this family as much as I do. I hope you can come to let him be another brother to you. I think that's another thing that defines us- the elder of us said we're all sensitive, and I know that's true. But I also think another thing that makes a Loki a Loki is we cannot escape our bond to you, even when it hurts us or our anger or pain is so biting we wish we could."
Thor wants to hug him, but refrains, instead squeezing his hand, "I already see him as my brother. I recognize in him both fragments of you in your childhood and yet also his distinct self. It is odd to have two brothers named Loki, but...no more strange than when you and I discovered we had an older sister who was the goddess of death who was bent on destroying us and ruling Asgard."
Loki's eyebrows spring up, "Pardon me? A sister?"
"You don't know about Hela? She was father's eldest, locked away when her thirst for power grew beyond his control."
Loki lets go of Thor's hand, "Oh my. I think perhaps we should get lunch- I hear Tam calling- and then you can tell us all of this tale."
Thor looks worried, "It might upset you. You and I were not entirely friendly, though we were honest with one another and you did, in the end, save our people from destruction."
Loki grins, "Oh? I finally had a moment of heroism? Do tell..."
Thor laughs, "Happily! But I like your suggestion of lunch. After, if you so wish, I'll tell everyone how we ended up on a planet called Sakaar, I how fought the Hulk, how I came into my power as the god of thunder, and how you were both the saviour of Asgard and the cause of Ragnarok. After all, Asgard is not a place it's a people."
"Then perhaps," Loki says, "We are forming our own Asgard here- our little shining city in a hovel with our found family."
Thor nods, "I think you're right." He stands and offers Loki help, but his brother declines. They walk together back to their home. Thor can't stop beaming, his heart full of hope for the first time since he became king and stood beside his brother as he'd always envisioned he would. Now, there is no throne, there is no kingdom, but with Loki beside him, there is nothing more he feels he could ever want.
