Why I Hate Myself
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Disclaimer: I hate this thing; we all know I don't own the teen titans
Author's Notes: okay first off I had this idea on my mind for a while. It's not a one shot but more of a drabble, if you will. Well, I started to feel bad for Kitten. Wow, I'm getting soft on everybody. It must be my allergy medicine.
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Now On With The Story or Drabble:
Kitten's P.O.V.
I walked into my room. I tried my best not to just fling my self on my bed. I was a mess. A group of kids had thrown mud at me. I knew them very well. One of the boys in the group I liked, although he hates me. Well I don't blame him I hate myself too.
I walk towards my light switch and flick it on. I looked at my walls. They were pink. Sure I had loved pink. But it got old, just like everything else. I had pink clothes, pink pens, notebooks, and I even died my hair pink. It just got old. I hate to look at the walls. They were pink and filled with stupid band boy posters that girls swoon over.
It all made me sick. I was once like this but not any more. I had changed. I used to think I was the best thing out there, until I got a piece of reality thrown at me.
I soon discovered the one I loved, hated me more than life it's self. My friends weren't really my friends. My father hates me; even my cat hates me. It's okay though because I hate myself too.
The person I loved didn't love me back. He hates me forever. I ruin his life and the life of his friends. I torture them by spreading rumors and threatening them that my daddy would do something because he had the money to do so. His friends hate me too. Like I said I don't blame them because I hate myself too.
The people that I thought were my friends weren't really. They were only because I had money. That's the only reason why I'm popular. Most people find me annoying and bratty. I have a loud mouth. I always whine when I don't get my way. I would throw a temper tantrum when I was insulted.
My father hates me because I'm just a nuance who waists his money on the stupidest shit. His words not mine. He always has to come down to the school because I get in trouble. I don't get into fistfights but I have a smart mouth. I always complain about everything. The only reason why he doesn't send me to a boarding school is because my mother asks him not to. In fear of loosing my mother he complies.
My cat hates me because I don't feed her. When I get mad I kick her. She claws at me and walks away. She's too snooty, but I guess she got it from me.
I get changed, throwing my mud stained clothes away. I look into my mirror seeing my reflection. I hated the way I looked. I had blonde hair and blue eyes. All that just screams loud mouth prep. I take scissors and start to cut my hair. I just didn't want it.
I know most of you think I'm just complaining but I'm not. The only person I can say that doesn't hate me is my mother. She's the exact opposite of me. She has black hair and brown eyes. She's nice and knows when to keep quiet. She's not spoiled rotten like me.
Of course, over the last few months I've been contemplating on suicide. It would end all my problems. Though I would just be another burden to my father, who would have to make a funeral.
Everyday I want to cry, but the tears never come. Of course I cry when I was dramatic, but I've never cried because I was truly hurting.
I climb into my bed. I reach over to the nightstand and take out my switchblade. It's the only way I let out the pain. After I cut my self twice I get up and clean the cuts. I once again look into the mirror. I hate my self and everyone hates me. It's simple as that.
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So yeah I felt bad for Kitten. So it's kind of like an insight to Kitten's life. I normally wouldn't do this but hey it's good to stop and try new things right. I hope you guys read it and review.
Melissa out