Disclaimer: Don't own the characters nor make any money from stories etc, and bow down to their original creators Joss, et al., plus all the wonderful online writers who continue to give the Buffy/Angel verse characters life.
Dedicated to tempestsreach who inspired the story and deserves all the hugs that one could provide.
PART 4
There had been light and an old friend and he thought they had talked… but he couldn't stay awake and when he woke again it was dark and he felt the ache.
So he let tears flow, because he knew she understood tears since Wesley… but she didn't attend him, yet there were warm arms and there was… feeding… and the nice touch… it wasn't the floor but it was touch. And so he slept again.
He woke again to dark, was he back in his dimension? Their dimension… the one where the food tasted right, and there were people he knew or at least were his size, where her 'primordial scum' resided, where his Sire had… he could not continue with his thoughts. He was her prized pet now, if she opened his cage, he opened himself… the other world was gone… he waited for her attentions, and the ensouled half breed let his tears fall silently.
…………………..
Xander was frantic. Spike had been fine after Jason's visit, sleeping contentedly without even the need for the duster. Xander wandered down to reception worrying a little at just what Jason had assumed, though felt strangely… comfortable that others might think he and Spike were a couple.
He had simply gone down to pick up the message from the front desk and pay another week's rent, then thanked John, who smiled and made some comment about the LA Lakers who were apparently playing that night. Xander had nodded and absently promised to watch the match on television. Yet as he returned, it seemed all hell had broken loose for his friend.
Spike was on the floor again still asleep but alternately whimpering and begging.
He slammed the door, swiftly threw some blood into a basin of hot water and began to tie off fingers on yet another glove.
…………………….
After minutes of waiting and the tentacles not touching him, something was not right.
Then he realized. It was obvious. It had happened so many times… they must have moved the court again, because his cage was all wrong and he couldn't get a purchase on the teat. It always happened when she went out of the palace… He had learned. He kept getting knocked off when her servants were rough with the cage. And sometimes she was too preoccupied to fill the feeding floor and the base would shrink and her servants would forget, so he would hunger for days.
Sometimes they would simply take him out and tie him to her throne, and then it was always hard and cold and his stomach would ache until she noticed. But then there was bliss as she was always sorry, and would cradle him in her tentacles as he fed from the source. And he was able to take his time suckling and laving the warm frond until it gave up its prize, her worry for his wellbeing encompassed in the fronds stroking over his torso, through his hair, and pleasuring him as he drank.
It must be that! Because he felt himself being lifted and was sure he could feel her frond caressing his hair and stroking his body, so he knew to stay lax and compliant. He hungered for her spellings, his stomach growled and felt twisted, though he knew his begging would mean nothing. So he waited, because she always rewarded him when he waited. Lately he knew that waiting was easier because he was always so very tired, but he was content with his body being weaker, because he knew that waiting patiently was always rewarded, and now lying still was easy, since now, it was all he could manage.
……………………….
Xander felt Spike go limp as he lifted the still light male form back onto the bed. He grabbed the duster and pressed it into Spike's arms then reorganized the covers around the shivering figure before deciding to slide in beside him to cradle his friend. He then held the warm feeding glove to the lax mouth and waited.
……………………
In his fragile state, when in other palaces or the courts of one her 'seconds' on a visit, Illyria was careful to give instructions for her Pet, but her servants sometimes forgot to pass on the message to the staff of the household.
Spike mused… they must be in the Phi court – they never gave him his floor in the Phi court. And Illyria always instructed her minions that if he was found without his floor, they should always provide his comfort garment… the old leather duster and she should be informed immediately. And he had the leather in his arms, so...
A few seconds later the theory was endorsed. If denied his floor, then his mistress Illyria would also feed him directly from one of her fronds when she was finished with her business for the day. It was his reward and his only solace. And now he was drinking from what felt like one of her soft fronds, and could feel her stroking him with another of her appendages as he suckled, so he calmed and rubbed against the leather… and suckled… and was stroked… But in the back of his mind something triggered distress.
It wasn't her juices, it was an old memory… his original food was coming from the frond... then not a frond... a teat, and he knew this… It was human blood and comfort and...
………………………
Spike came to full consciousness with a jolt, pulled off the feeding glove and without thought scrambled backwards in confusion and inexplicable terror, only to tip off the bed yet again, this time hitting his head hard on the side table on the way down. He ended in an inelegant heap on the floor for the third time in as many days.
Xander did as he had done each time this had happened. He tied off the top of the glove so it would not leak, pushed back the bedcovers and grabbed the duster, then moved around the bed, squatted down and pushed the duster into the arms of the now lucent but utterly upset vampire. He then lifted Spike back into bed before sliding in to spoon him from behind.
Xander always held tight and whispered words of comfort whilst slowly caressing his friend, and as Spike drifted off into slumber again. Xander would then pull the covers over both of them to remain until he was sure the nightmares had passed and Spike was sleeping peacefully once more.
It was three weeks since Spike's rescue and human carer was beginning to wonder just how long it would take for Spike to recover… and how on earth he was going to be able to take up a day job if these episodes were to continue – regardless of their frequency.
………..
Spike woke again late evening, this time with a slight frown. He was still spooned in a warm hug and recognized the scent now. He knew him. His lightly snoozing protector, Xander, was holding him tight.
He also knew he was cradling his own duster like a small child with a comfort blanket, but still pulled it a little closer as he remembered the reason for his sore head and the tender care he had been shown. He pushed back into the warmth for a moment, then reached up to his own injured hairline, still sporting a nasty gash that he had vague memories of the precursor to his fall, then began to pet the old leather again.
Xander had been awake since Spike started to move some five minutes earlier, and sported an unbelievably awful head ache courtesy of lack of sleep, food and very real worry for a friend, yet still managed to hug Spike from behind, and rasped "Hey buddy, you OK?" hoping the blonde might again be lucid.
He was rewarded when the figure in his arms rolled so their torsos touched and the never still hands caressed his back and hair. He heard the whispered words "Oh Luv, thank you … but please… let me…", then was shocked as a soft cool mouth found his. At that moment Xander's world shifted and so did Spike's.
They already had a connection, and had fooled around a little once pre Hellmouth obliteration. And more recently when Spike cried and shook as Xander had petted him, twice watching with some embarrassment as the semiconscious, disorientated friend humped the bed a little with Xander's very platonic (meant to be soothing) stroking, then cleaned him up after the vampire spilled his seed.
The beautiful figure in his arms now simply gave himself to Xander without malice, or apparently any more forethought than a child throwing himself into the arms of a parent. There was unconditional love and a complete trust in his rescuer, all being conveyed in the most primal of ways.
Xander felt like Sire, his protector, and Spike continued to kiss the human holding him. From his oldest memories of Angelus, he recalled that stroking the shaft between the strong thighs was required when trying to please Sire, while proper servicing came later.
Xander was already aroused by the unexpected kiss, so groaned at the touch and his brain caught up with his body, but then gave in to the wonderful sensations and began to deepen the kiss.
Spike pushed further into the embrace, finally feeling whole again.
Illyria had always been attentive even when she knew her pet was dying, and now, finally, his rescuer had determined what Spike was missing.
Spike knew it was Xander now, yet intuitively and physically (as he felt his savior harden) felt his attentions were welcome, so did everything he could think of to convey his gratitude in his actions. This beautiful brunette had saved him, cared for and… loved him, and he was not one to take that lightly, even if the love was only that of a friend or family.
In the back of Xander's mind, he kept up the mantra of 'not gay, don't take advantage, need to slow down', but it only lasted for a minute or so, then he simply gave in to the expert touches and amorous lips.
Finally, as hard length met hard length, and they caressed their most intimate parts, the human gave in to need, as they rubbed erection against erection and continued to kiss until both stilled, arched a little simultaneously, then climaxed. Xander on the inside of his shorts, and Spike wetting a pair of Xander's loose pajama bottoms that he had been dressed in by his lovely carer from their first day together.
They were both shocked, Xander embarrassed, and yet both still held their tender embrace.
The following day there was no illusion or embarrassment. Spike serviced his savior, waking him with a mouth and throat used to much longer appendages swallowing Xander's member. It was nothing but the wonderful feeling of being filled and pleasing his friend. Or at least it was until the object of his attentions woke as he climaxed, realized the reason and dragged Spike up for a passionate kiss before processing what had occurred, calmed and said, "Not saying I didn't like it but… um… You don't have to do that you know…"
"Wanted to… always made her happy… and I'm yours now so… need to do what…"
At which Xander pushed away, horrified, "Woah there! What's with the ownership thingy?"
Spike looked crestfallen, then wide eyed and tearful, faced Xander, "Illyriah gave me to you… because I was… failing her… so now… and… I really thought… you were happy with me… that you wanted me, I'm sorry. My mistake." Spike turned his face away and curled in on himself. Still confused by vivid dreams that felt real; and a body that was returning to health; and knowing his kind carer who fed him blood and held him; and still compelled to act as his training and the residual effects of Illyria's seed from the past year had determined; and now… he felt utterly lost.
Xander was beyond distressed. He had obviously, though quite innocently, injured his friend. This formerly proud Master Vampire, the savior of their Earth, at least twice apparently, seemed... broken.
He stepped off the bed and moved around the mattress until at Spike's front. He then slowly but forcibly uncurled the figure who was again holding the leather duster, rocking and keening, eyes shut tight and tears dripping across his nose and all the way down the other side to drip onto the sheets.
Holding Spike with his full body length, legs over legs and almost pinning him to the bed with his torso, he tilted the pale face so Spike had no choice but to look into the chocolate eyes.
Xander then whispered his message as if to a frightened child, and with as much love as he could engender in a few words,"Hey… Hey! Come on Spike… Please! I… um… I just meant that I don't own you… no one does… Please, please! Just look at me for a second will you. I want to help you, and I liked what we did (which now that I say it, it is a little unexpected…), but I need… well… bottom line is, you don't have to… you know, unless you want to OK!… And once you're well…then... Anyway… just please…"
Xander had no idea how to end the conversation so simply hugged the smaller figure to his chest and was reassured as a cool mouth sought his warm one and the lips parted, inviting him in.
………..
The phone rang at ten am. There was a representative of the construction company waiting in the foyer. He untangled himself from his vampire, kissed the still sleepy friend chastely, then dressed quickly to meet his prospective new employer.
Looking back at the pretty male form in his bed as he left the room, he hoped that, for the first time in his life… things might finally be working out.