Disclaimer: Not mine.
A/N: A short bit I wrote after seeing the previews for Proud Flesh. Can be categorized as a AU/Deleted Scene, I guess. Spoiler: Only the first line in italics; everything else is a product of my imagination. 100 fluff. Pairngs: BA, of course. Rating for brief mention of adult themes. Any OoC is because I'm still feeling out the characters. Constructive criticism always welcome.
BUGS
Eames: You know what I like to do to bugs? I like to watch my partner squash them.
- Proud Flesh
Alex flashed a quick grin at her partner as she sauntered around the table. He smiled back, hesitantly, as if fearful of giving too much away. Surely no one would question under what circumstances Alex had seen her partner squash a bug. Roaches were a frequent sight in the Major Case squad room.
Alex and Bobby finished interrogating the suspect and left the room.
"Coffee?" Bobby asked.
"Sure," Alex agreed. "Let's splurge and run across the street and get some. I don't think I can handle another cup from the squad room."
Bobby chuckled as they stepped into the elevator. The pair was silent for a moment, before Alex spoke up.
"Do you remember the first time you killed a bug for me, Bobby?" Alex teased.
"I'll never forget," he grinned back, "and not just because that was the biggest roach I've ever seen."
Alex raised her eyebrow at Bobby flirtatiously, her heart warming as a mild blush spread up Bobby's neck.
"You know I was only screaming about the roach, don't you Bobby?" Alex said more softly, laying a comforting hand on his arm.
Bobby nodded his head up and down while rubbing the back of his neck. "I know, but it still doesn't do much for a man's self-esteem to hear his girlfriend shriek in terror and yell, 'Get it off!' right before he's about to have sex with her for the first time."
"Bobby, sshh," Alex said, giving a quick glance around. The pair had just exited the building and were crossing the plaza. "Someone might hear us."
"Well, if your neighbor didn't hear your yelp that night I wouldn't worry about anyone hearing me now," he said, giving Alex a wicked grin before placing his hand on the small of her back and guiding her across the street, keeping an ever watchful eye out for errant traffic.
"Bobby, it was a big roach and it was hanging on my ceiling right above my head. I can't help that the first time I saw it was when you pushed me onto my back and then climbed on top of me. I knew if it fell on me at that moment, there was no way I'd be able to push you off to get out of the way."
Bobby looked down at Alex and smiled. "I would have protected you," he said gently teasing her.
"I know," she said, looking up and grinning back at him. "But either way, that roach still killed the mood."
"For you, maybe," Bobby said, a wistful tone to his voice.
"Oh, Bobby," Alex said, rubbing her hand up and down his back. "I'm sorry."
Bobby and Alex reached the other side of the street and made it to the café. Bobby opened the door and stepped back to allow Alex to enter.
"You want to get a table and I'll order?" he volunteered.
"Nah," Alex said, shrugging as she regarded the café. "It's not too full. Besides, I'd rather stay with you."
Bobby smiled before stepping up to the counter and placing their order.
Alex smiled slightly as she remembered that night. It had been a long time coming, but after months of ambiguous time spent together outside of work, Bobby finally worked up the nerve to kiss Alex one night as he walked her up to her apartment. Alex froze at first, astonished to find Bobby's lips brushing across hers. However, she quickly overcame her initial shock and wrapping her arms around Bobby's neck, pulling him closer to her and returning his kiss with unrestrained passion.
"Do you want to come in?" she breathed a few minutes later as they paused to catch their breath.
"Uh, well, I…" Bobby stuttered and nervously rubbed the back of his neck.
Alex removed her hands from Bobby's neck and propped them on her hips.
"Come on, Bobby," she huffed. "What's been going on these last few months?"
"I, uh, well…" Alex sighed, unlocked the door and drug the still protesting Bobby in behind her.
Half an hour later, with most of their clothes removed, Bobby and Alex finally made it to her bedroom, collapsing onto her bed. As Bobby moved his head down Alex's neck to explore the rest of her body with his mouth, Alex sighed contently and opened her eyes. It was then that she focused on the enormous roach languidly making its way across her ceiling. Her shriek had sent Bobby flying off the bed as Alex rolled across it and flopped to the floor.
"Bobby!" Alex shrieked, pulling the comforter off the bed and over her head. She heard Bobby kneel in front of her and felt him trying to pull the comforter off her.
"What's wrong?" he asked, the fear evident in his voice. "Eames, God, I'm so sorry."
Alex finally acquiesced to Bobby and let him pull the comforter down to her shoulders.
"Oh Eames," he sighed, cupping her face in her hands. "I am so sorry."
Alex's eyes were squeezed shut. "It's not you," she said through clenched teeth. "Look up," she pointed to the ceiling before yanking the comforter back over her head.
Bobby glanced up and starting laughing. "A roach, Eames?" he asked as his laughter grew louder. "Tough little Alex Eames who doesn't take crap from anyone is cowing in fear from a little roach?" He rocked back on his haunches and kept laughing.
"It's not funny, Bobby," Alex's voice was mumbled as she talked under the comforter. "I hate roaches."
Bobby enjoyed a few more laughs at Alex's expense before looking around for something to kill the roach with. So his little firecracker had an Achilles' heel. He wasn't going to let her hear the end of this any time soon.
A few moments later, Alex heard a resounding whack against her ceiling. "Got it," Bobby's deep voice trickled through the comforter. "Be right back," he said, and then it was silent for a few minutes more before she heard the toilet flush.
"You can come out now, Eames," Bobby said, kneeling in front of her once again.
Alex hesitantly stuck her head out and regarded the ceiling, which was blessedly roach-free. "Thanks," she said, narrowing her eyes as Bobby started laughing once more.
There was an awkward moment of silence as Bobby and Alex made eye contact. "I'm sorry, Bobby," Alex finally whispered.
"Hey, these things happen," he said nonchalantly, pulling himself and Alex to their feet.
"So I guess…" his voice trailed off as his eyes drifted over to the bed and then back to Alex.
"Sorry," she murmured, shuddering slightly at the thought of the roach.
Bobby sighed imperceptibly before draping his arm around Alex and leading her out of the room. They sat down on the couch, and Alex wordlessly handed Bobby the remote before snuggling up next to him.
They watched TV for a while, Alex growing bored and tired as Bobby rapidly switched from one show to the next. Finally, she could no longer contain her yawn.
"It's bedtime, Eames," Bobby whispered.
"Gonna…stay…here," she mumbled. "No…roaches…out…here." Bobby suppressed a chuckle and squeezed Alex to him.
"What if I stay with you?" he asked, bashful for being so forward yet at the same time knowing Alex's straight-forward personality would tell him no if she didn't want him to.
"Promise to kill all the roaches, Bobby?" she whispered, still more asleep than awake.
"Promise," he murmured back, kissing her temple.
"Okay," she murmured, and then Bobby scooped her up in one deft movement, comforter and all, and headed back to her room. He laid Alex down, did a cursory check for roaches one last time, and then slid into bed next to her and enveloped her in his arms.
"Sleep tight, Eames," he whispered, pushing her hair back from her face to kiss her forehead.
"Make it up to you…next week?" Alex asked groggily.
"We'll see," he returned, squeezing her tight before drifting off to sleep himself.
"What are you grinning about now, Eames?" Bobby asked as he collected their coffee and followed her back out the door.
"Mm," she murmured, taking her first sip of the coffee. "The wonderfully roach-free status of your apartment."
Bobby smiled as they made their way back across the street. Two nights later, he and Eames had ended up back at his apartment, determined to finish what the roach had interrupted a few days earlier.
"What's that smell, Bobby?" Alex asked as she entered his apartment. "It smells kinda musty in here."
"The exterminator was here yesterday," he said as he shrugged out of his coat and then took Eames'. Noticing the mild look of panic that passed over Eames' face, he quickly continued, "Just as a precaution. I don't think I'd live through another roach interruption."
Eames rolled her eyes at Bobby but smiled. "Thank you," she whispered as she snuggled against him, closing her eyes and sighing as his arms wrapped around her and squeezed tight. Bobby rested his chin on Alex's head and closed his eyes as well. Dear, sweet Eames. He'd kill every roach in New York City if it would make her feel better.
The two detectives reached 1PP and stepped into the elevators.
"So," Bobby said, twisting his head to look at Alex. "Got any plans for tonight?"
"You," she replied, grinning seductively, knowing that the implication in her words would have Bobby stirred up all afternoon.
"My place or yours?" he asked, smiling broadly because he already knew the answer.
"Yours," she said, "definitely yours."
FIN
