..
..
I avoided Jennie every chance I got. If I heard her in the kitchen, I stayed in my room. When I heard the keys jingle outside, I rushed to leave whatever I was doing and hide in my room.
I couldn't face her.
I thought I was avoiding her because I was mad. I mean, I was. But I couldn't face her because I was embarrassed. I had never, ever in my entire life told a girl I loved her. Jennie had been the only one but not the 'in love' kind. I told her and I got slapped in the face for it. I told her the truth and she persecuted me for it.
I was dejected.
I went through the motions—got up, went to class, worked out until I could pass out, then studied until I passed out and did it all over again. It didn't take long for me to figure out that's what heartbreak feels like; what it does to you.
The only thing I had that was anything other than shitty was my spot at USC. I decided to go there instead. Part of me just liked the school better, but another part knew that Jennie would be working at some publishing company in New York and I couldn't be near her on purpose. Fuck.
That hurt more than anything. I lost my best friend—the one person who understood me, who was always there for me, who could make me smile when all I wanted to do is cry. Now all I do is stop myself from crying over her.
Mom was already looking for a condo for me in Los Angeles. She always asks about Jennie. I told her what I did, she was sorry for me too. I just got a bunch of pity, but I knew she had good intentions. She worries about me a lot but I lie and say I'm fine.
Truth is I'm not fine at all.
How could I go back to normal conversation after the last one we had? She told me she could never love me. She told me I would never have a chance with her. What did I expect anyway? I had never been in a relationship. She knows how many hearts I've probably broken—the girls who didn't understand it was a one-time thing. It was never intentional. I thought she knew that. She obviously doesn't trust me with her heart. It doesn't make sense. She trusted me with everything else, everything. You were there.
Some days I silently wished she would barge in my room, say she made a mistake and that she loves me that way too. Or that she wants to give me a chance. It's now the middle of April and that still hasn't happened. I wanted to hold out longer, or forever because of how scared I was. But it was April eleventh. We've been best friends for too long for me to not be there for her on this day.
After class, I stopped and got her a bouquet of flowers. I picked up a random book from the grocery store book section—some crime novel. She would like anything I got her. I went to get her favorite ice cream—banana nut.
She was home when I got there, sitting in the living room. She perched with her legs folded on the couch and a pillow on her lap. She was staring at the television but not watching whatever was on the screen. She didn't even look when I shut the door.
This day is always hard for her. She was too young to remember her mom, but I know losing her mother left a hole in her heart. One that she only felt today. Her and Jisoo usually talk over the phone if they're apart. Then she talks to me. I wanted to, but I couldn't do it today. I couldn't talk to her and forget everything. I can't talk to only pieces of her anymore. I was selfish. I wanted all of her. And I was too scared to settle for anything less.
I walked in front of her, blocking the television. She barely looked up. I saw she had been crying. Her t-shirt was rumpled and it stretched across her chest, she wasn't wearing a bra. My body still reacted to hers. She just looked so sad, I wanted to hold her. But I wasn't sure she wanted that, neither was I sure I could let her go. I set down the stuff in front of her and slowly unpacked the bag.
She grabbed the book first. Turning it over she read the description as she bit her lip softly. I went to the kitchen to get her a spoon for her ice cream. When I returned, she was staring up at me with her blue somber eyes. I exhaled heavily. It was too hard not to run to her.
"Thank you."
I inhaled at the sound of her voice—I hadn't heard it in weeks. All I did was stare at her photos. I nodded once and turned to go back to my room.
"Will you sit with me? Please?"
My back was to her but I could feel her eyes begging.
I wanted to. But I was still angry with her for not even giving me a chance. I would have stepped up—taken her out on dates after googling what to do, started treating her how I felt about her and not just as my best friend. But she didn't give me the chance for that. Is that what I meant to her?
"I have an exam tomorrow. I have to study. Otherwise I would.." liar, "let me know if you need anything." I didn't look at her as I spoke. When I shut my door behind me, I swore I heard her start sobbing.
..
I didn't speak to her for another two weeks after that. Leaving her alone on her worst day wasn't my brightest moment but I let myself sleep at night knowing that I got her something to take her mind off it. She keeps the book I got her on her nightstand now, that means it's one of the ones she rereads.
It was four days before her sister's wedding when Jisoo called me. I was leaving class—it was all I seemed to be doing—when I answered.
"Hey Chu." I answered.
"Lisa! Hi, how are you?"
"Fine. What's up?" I was sure Jisoo knew about what I did. Her and Jennie don't keep secrets.
"I just wanted to check and make sure you're still coming to my wedding. You are coming, right?" I told Jennie I would go with her. Much as I wanted to, I couldn't go back on my word.
"Yeah, I am."
She then went into a spiel about all the details. Haein didn't have many friends so after much begging from Jisoo, I agreed to be one of his groomsmen. I wasn't surprised he didn't have friends. His brother was his best man and that's all he had.
Jisoo sounded really excited though. I was happy for her. The wedding was to happen back home in the local church with a reception afterward.
"Don't worry, I'll be there."
"Thank you." She sighed and then her voice changed, "don't get too worked up about Ruby Jane. You know she isn't good with her feelings." The mention of Jennie took me back to a darker place I never wanted to see again.
"Yeah, I'll try." I lied.
"Good. See you soon." The line went dead.
Back home I hit the books to get a jump start on finals. I still wanted to finish with a 4.0 even though med school was already guaranteed. I was glad Jisoo's wedding fell on a weekend so I wouldn't miss any school. We should leave tomorrow. I only have one class at nine. I should probably tell her that.
I was in the kitchen boiling eggs around seven when Jennie came in. This was late for her. usually I run when I hear the keys. I guess I'm recovering.
"Hi, Lisa." She hid the shock in her voice. She dropped her bag and stood in the kitchen. I glanced at her. Mistake. Fuck. She looked amazing even in slacks and a button up shirt.
"Hi." I gruffed. I watched my eggs like they would jump out of the pan.
"So, Jisoo told me she talked to you today. She said you're still coming with me to the wedding."
"I said I would, didn't I?" I snapped. The eggs were done. I moved around her and drained them, replacing it with cold water.
"She also said you were going to be one of Haein's groomsmen. That's nice of you."
"Hm." I started peeling the eggs.
She was still there. Watching me. I wished she would go away so I could stop feeling like I had to say something. Anything to break the silence.
"Lisa, why won't you talk to me?" Her voice was strained. The hurt became evident and I felt for her on instinct. But then I remembered it was her who hurt me.
I tied up my eggs for the morning and turned to face her. I hadn't realized I was glaring, but the flush in her cheeks told me I was.
"I don't have anything else to say. I said everything before and I don't want to repeat it. The first time was enough embarrassment." I brushed past her to my room but she followed after me. Her heels clanked against the floor.
"Lisa, you shouldn't be. I didn't want that." She was now in my room. I turned to face her again, not expecting her to be so close. Her body brushed against mine and it was almost enough to make me give in.
"Well, that's what happened." I stared down into her eyes. tears were already starting to well up. Fuck. Waterworks are my weakness.
"It was just a surprise, I… I didn't know what to say."
My jaw jutted in shock."You didn't know what to say? You told me you would never love me. You said I couldn't even get the chance to be more than friends. Do you not remember that?"
She said nothing as her bottom lip trembled. God, I wanted to kiss her so bad right now. To hold her. something.
"I'm sorry I hurt you, that wasn't my intention. It's been so hard these past few months without you."
I shook my head. It was hard for me too, but I couldn't tell her that. "Look, Ruby Jane. I don't want to talk about this anymore. I can't—unless you're giving me a chance, I just can't." I stepped away from her and sat at my desk. "Be ready tomorrow after work to leave for Jisoo's wedding."
"Lisa…" she croaked. "Please, talk to me."
I hadn't noticed she came near me until her hands were on my shoulders. I flinched away. "I told you, I don't have anything left to say."
"Lisa, we can't just stop being friends over this! You're my best friend, Lisa. I need you."
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath so I wouldn't yell. "I need you too, but not in the same way you need me. Not in the same way I used to."
"It's been weeks, Lisa. Surely you can get past this—just tell me that it won't be like this forever."
I laughed with no humor. Jumping up from the chair, I was in her face in seconds. "Are you serious? Maybe you didn't hear me well the first time, Ruby Jane. I. Am. In. Love. With. You. There is no getting past it. I want you to myself. I want you in love with me too!" I shouted.
"And I want my best friend back!"
"Dammit, I don't want just half of you, Ruby Jane! I want all of you. You can't give me that. So forgive me if I'm not jumping at the opportunity to torture myself for the rest of my life, because I can't have you. You are all I want and that won't change."
Her eyes stared back into mine, unnerving me. But she didn't say anything. With a dejected sigh and sniffle, she left the room. Breaking my heart further.
..
..
Sitting through a ceremony where two people declare their love for each other was harder than I thought it would be. I assumed it would just be awkward being around Jennie because of what happened, but no.
It was unbearable.
Anytime the word 'love' was said or anything relating to loving someone, I looked right at her and she looked away. Either that or I would avoid looking at her entirely. I almost took my mind off it with alcohol last night—at Haein's bachelor party. I don't have the energy to go into detail.
And it was pitiful, don't ask.
But that didn't work. I didn't want to show up hung over. Jisoo didn't do anything to me and she didn't deserve that. So, there I was at the altar with Haein, watching the love radiate between them. I used to deny love—pretend it didn't exist because it was easier but it really isn't. Especially not now that I've told Jennie. It's out there. It's real. And it fucking sucks.
"Lisa! Come get in the picture!" Jisoo shouted from across the field.
Their ceremony was in the Florence Civic Center. Pretty much anything of importance in this little town happened here. It wasn't far from where we lived but Haein and Jisoo booked rooms for a select few guests for one night. Which I was about to go to before she lured me over to the open field.
Their theme was white and purple—I think. Everything was either white or purple. Even the flowers. Whatever kind of flowers they are.
"Stand next to Jennie."
I groaned internally.
Jennie exchanged a glance with me. It might have been the first time she looked at me since the other day in my bed room. Even on the ride here. We didn't speak to each other.
"Sure." I stood behind Jennie in the prom-style line. She stiffened when I brushed against her, I assumed it was just out of shock, I had to for my sanity.
Getting this close to her was harder than I thought it would be. From afar she looked beautiful, of course—always. But now, inches from her… goodness. Her dress was strapless and long, but the skin it exposed at her chest was enough for me. Every breath she took made her breasts strain against the sweetheart neckline. I only know these things because we used to watch Fashion Police together. The burnt orange color would look like prison on anyone else but on her, it matched her skin perfectly. Like the Clemson t-shirt she always wears. Her hair was tied up in a bun with wisps of hair framing her face, giving me a perfect view of her creamy neck.
"Can everyone get in closer!" The photographer must hate me. I stepped closer just a bit and heard Jennie gasp. She glanced at me quickly but then faced back forward.
"Sorry." I muttered.
I gently placed my hands on her waist and smiled like nothing was wrong. The photographer had us in all different kinds of positions—I swear he had us out there for twenty minutes before I snuck off. To the bar.
"Scotch. Neat, please." The bartender gave me a look but filled my glass.
I downed it and dropped it on the table. I exhaled with a heavy sigh and rubbed my face. Somehow, I was exhausted and the day wasn't even over yet. I guess a broken heart does that. Funny how I've avoided this my entire life and it all came crashing down with one sentence from my best friend.
"You look beat, girl." A heavy hand hit my shoulder. Theo.
"Oh, no I'm just… pretty tired." I smiled softly.
He grinned. He never grins. Must be because he just gave his daughter away. Proud moment for a father, I guess.
"Yeah, I understand. Weddings'll do that to you." He got a Jack and coke from the bartender. "How is Jennie doing up there? I feel like she doesn't tell me the truth." My jaw clenched at the sound of her name, but I had to play it cool. He picks up on things easily.
"She's really good. Her boss has her reading a new manuscript every day. She's… really happy." Before two months ago, that was completely true. I don't even know if she was particularly unhappy about what happened. I know I was.
"That's good. I'm glad. I'm just a little worried about this New York thing, the city is ruthless." He chuckled but I was completely lost. His steel blue eyes stared back at me. "She didn't tell you? The job with Simon and shmuck? Shelly? I don't know. Some big company up there."
"Simon and Schuster. Yeah. That." I lied.
He smiled proudly again. "I know it's a big deal. I'm happy for her. Just wish she wasn't going to be alone." He rubbed his neck and shifted in his black tuxedo. He's never this dressed up.
"Yeah. Me too." I played along but I was hung on the fact she hadn't told me. How long did she know? Then I remembered I hadn't spoken to the girl in over two months. Shit. I'm usually the first person she tells her good news to. I felt it then. In the back of my head and in my heart—being her best friend, her person; is more important than anything else to me.
"Sure, you can't go to NYU instead?" He joked. I shrugged it off. Was I even sure? "Congratulations on USC though."
I nodded. "Thank you."
He clapped my shoulder again and walked off.
I watched him hug Jisoo and lead her to the dance floor. Everyone made way for the father daughter dance. I felt her eyes on my before I saw her. Jennie was staring at me. When she saw my eyes meet hers she smiled. I couldn't return it. God knows I wanted to get over this resentment I was carrying but I couldn't. It hurt too much. I just wanted a chance. I deserve at least that, right?
The acting was eating me alive. When Jisoo finished her dance, I congratulated her before taking my silent leave. Well, I tried to.
"Young Manoban!" Jeez, Ma.
"Hey, old Manoban." I turned at the elevators.
"Very funny. You're leaving?" she smoothed out her salmon colored dress and shot me a concerned look.
"Yeah I… I'm just really tired." Her brows knitted with concern. I smiled to reassure her. "I'm fine, ma. I'll meet you for breakfast tomorrow, yeah?" I clicked the up button.
"Okay." She reached up and kissed my cheek before walking off.
I entered the elevator and rode up to the top floor. It stopped a few floors up. The doors opened to a cute girl—maybe my age or a year younger. She saw me and giggled softly before stepping in. She pointed to her cheek and then I knew.
"Oh. My mom." I explained.
She laughed. "That's sweet. Is something going on today? I've seen so many people dressed like you but you look the best." She batted her eyelashes and puffed out her chest. On any other day, I'd get her in my hotel room. Not today.
"My best friend's sister got married. I was one of the groomsmen." She nodded in understanding. She looked like she was going to the pool; shorts, tank top, flip flops. She was the definition of pretty blonde but all I saw when I looked at her was everything she was missing—everything that Jennie has. Fuck. I can't even fuck the heart ache out of me.
"I'll see you around!" She called after me as I exited the elevator. I offered her my best smile so she would have at least something to tell her friends.
I found my room and immediately stripped off my jacket and tie and loosened my shirt. I was too tired for anything else. I collapsed on the bed and started surfing channels. The setting sun was the perfect addition to my somber mood.
Jennie didn't tell me about her job. That's tough shit. Is this worth losing her? Is not having her really worth never being the same with her again? I hated to admit it—it made the last two months useless. But I was leaning towards a no.
..
About three hours into my disappearing act I hear a jostling at the door. I was too tired to get up. They'll go away. Then the door opened. Did I give anyone a key? I don't think so. So… I'm about to die.
I thought so.
I heard the footsteps and figured out who it was before I looked up. Jennie stood in the archway between the little living room and the bedroom. I wanted to say something but I was at a loss for words. Why didn't you tell me about New York? Did you change your mind? Can you love me, please?
None of those are very flattering.
She wasn't saying anything either. Then I noticed it. Cheesecake caught the bouquet. She set it on the table and then stared back at me. I tried to read her eyes for a hint, or something. But I came up short. Her blue eyes held so much mystery. I couldn't guess.
"Jennie, how did you get in here?" I asked her.
She didn't answer.
She held my gaze and she walked towards me. She stopped at the side of the bed and took off her heels, losing about two inches. What's she doing? She was biting her lip so hard it turned white.
"Ruby Jane," now I was confused.
She hitched her leg over the bed and straddled me. She had hiked her dress all the way up to her hips, exposing her fleshy thighs. Her heated sex was right above my cock—not very comfortable at all.
"I can't do this with you. Not after…" her finger pressed against my lips. When she was sure I wasn't saying anything else she leaned in to kiss me.
Just before her lips found mine I turned away and they touched my cheek instead. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I have to resist her. I have to. Or else it will be too hard.
"I can't Jennie—I've told you what I want. Casual sex isn't it." I whispered.
I turned to face her. We were inches apart, her forehead against mine. I inhaled her scent and realized how much I fucking missed her. The way her body is against mine right no it's too much. I'm not that strong.
She cupped my face in her small hands and forced me to look at her.
"I want you." It was barely a whisper from her.
I shook my head.
"There's a difference between wanting me and wanting to be with me." I replied.
"I know."
"You don't know if you want to be with me." I stated.
She nodded slowly. I let out a shaky breath. "I know that I should have given you the chance before—and I know I want this." She ground her hips into me and that was it. I'm a horny woman. I'm weak. I was finished.
When she leaned in to kiss me again I didn't protest. Her lips were soft against mine. Hesitant and sweet. I let her lead for a second before I parted my lips and took her bottom lip between mine. She sighed when I sucked softly and deepened the kiss.
My hands went to her thighs, dragging them up slowly until I reached her ass. I grabbed onto her and pulled her closer to me until she was flush against my body. Her fingers shook as they undid my buttons. I surrendered to the perfect feeling of her hands against my skin, appreciating each hard line of my body until she reached my shoulders and shucked off my shirt.
My hands went back to her dress and found the zipper on the side. I teased the skin on her chest, dragging my fingertips over the swell of her breasts until she shuddered against my lips. I kissed my way down her neck, over her skin—really appreciating every inch of her body.
I slid off her dress slowly, revealing a black lace bra. My breath caught at the sight of her—so, so perfect. I trailed my hands across her chest and back down her body. I lifted her up easily and slid off her dress.
"Lisa, I want it like the first time." Her voice was sure. The surest I have ever heard of it.
"Sure, Cheesecake."
When she kissed me again all my anger, frustration, pain , it all faded away. I love her too much to hold onto any of that. Her lips were soft against mine and timid—her innocence and lack of experience still sparked something inside of me. Her response was so natural when I flipped her over and pressed my body into hers. We fit together so perfectly—doesn't she see these things too?
It wasn't like any of the other times. Her hands roamed across my body—fisting in my hair, traveling over my shoulders and back. My body shook as she trailed her hands over my hips, stopping at the zipper of my pants. I waited to see if she would undress me herself. She did. The sound of my zipper ripped through our kiss. I lifted myself up to get out of my pants before my lips went back to her neck.
She mewled as I kissed the skin below her ear and sucked on her earlobe. I wondered why she never got her ears pierced—now I'm glad she didn't. She felt every sensation. I looked into her eyes and a silent communication passed between us. We were so good together, it's never like this with anyone else. Ever.
A deep groan flooded my chest when her fingers wrapped around my swelling cock. It felt so good it almost hurt; a flood of desire spread through my spine as she moved her hand up and down slowly. It almost disabled me.
She kept going as I took my mouth to her nipples. Her back arched right as I closed my mouth around her nipple. I sucked harder and she cried out. Music. I did the same to the other over and over until she was shaking so hard beneath me I thought she might come.
"Lisa!" She cried out as her body continued to tremble.
Hold up. "Did you just…"
Her eyes glazed over as she nodded slowly. I couldn't help but smile. I thought that was a myth—but my Cheesecake came just by me working her nipples.
"Jesus." I whispered just before I kissed her.
Her hand moved on my cock again, her thumb swirled around my tip and she moved up and down again. My hands went to her panties and I didn't waste time getting them off. The most innocent, sweet little gasp left her lips when I slid my finger through her slick folds, finding her clit immediately.
My eyes gazed at her sea-blue eyes as I worked her over and over. She was so perfectly responsive, I thought she would come again after a few more passes of my finger. She did. I circled my thumb around her clit as she came again, her hand clenching around me. I moved her hand away when I almost came. I needed to come inside of her.
"Jennie," Her eyes could barely stay open, "I won't do this without you knowing how much I love you. God, I'm so in love with you."
Her eyes widened and I silenced her with a kiss. I didn't want her to say anything. I just wanted her to know.
Then I was inside her. She was so tight and warm, I didn't think I would make it. My right hand was on the small of her back and the other was on her hip, holding her close to me. I moved inside of her with such a slow, steady pace it nearly killed me. I didn't know how much longer she could hold off; it seemed she was a bundle of orgasms beneath me.
Her arms wrapped around my chest and brought me closer to her. Her breasts pillowed against my chest, her nipples grazing against me every time I entered her. I don't know what I was doing the first time—maybe just going slow. But this…this was making love and I never thought I would do it with any woman. But here I was. With my best friend in the whole fucking world, making looooveeeee.
I wished I could last longer but once she bucked her hips toward me and met my thrusts I was finished. I came in such an earth shattering way I was lost for air.
"Jennie, God, Jennie…" I groaned into her neck as she clenched around me.
"Oh Lisa," she moaned as her nails raked down my back and settled where we joined.
I couldn't move. I was mush. I was still inside of her, my cock twitching in spurts. I was frozen. It was so good, felt so right and perfect. I nearly purred when she started curling my hair around my ear.
When I found my senses, I rolled off of her with a heavy sigh. She turned to face me and I laid on my side, my head on my hand as I propped myself up. She looked almost ethereal like this; the setting sun was behind us, lighting up her hair and casting a sort of halo around her naked body.
"You're so beautiful." I whispered. She blushed even further. I couldn't resist the urge to reach out and touch her so I laid my hand against her hip, drawing smooth circles around. She stared back at me.
"Why didn't you tell me about New York?"
Her chest froze with her breath before she answered. "I… you weren't speaking to me. I thought you wouldn't care." I grimaced.
"You know why I wasn't speaking to you." My voice was dark.
"I know, but it was so hard without you…" her voice broke. Tears flooded from her eyes suddenly.
"You hurt me Jennie. More than anyone has ever hurt me before. Every time I thought of you…" I shook my head as I brushed her tears away, "I went back to the day I told you the truth and you shot me down. I get that I don't have a good track record with relationships but I expected something—anything else from my best friend."
She sniffled but nodded at my words. "I shouldn't have said those things, Lisa. You're so sweet, and kind. You are good, I was just afraid. I thought that if we tried and it didn't work I would lose you—I'm not strong enough for that. These past few months have been hell without you. To think it could be like that forever, I was too afraid to risk it." She inhaled sharply as she cried harder.
I pulled her closer to me in a tight hug and kissed her cheek. "That's what I thought before I told you—it's why I didn't tell you all these years. But I had to."
"You're braver than me." She mumbled against my chest.
I chuckled. "No. Just Foolish."
She twisted her head up and her gaze went to my lips. I leaned in and her lips found mine. It was slow, sweet. My conscience ruined it by asking what it meant but I ignored it and pulled her closer. A little gasp muffled from her lips when she felt my erection against her thigh. Her hand trailed down my chest as she deepened the kiss but the rational part of me pulled away.
"What does this mean, Jennie?"
She gave me a funny look. I almost waved the question the longer I stared at her swollen, parted lips.
"You're asking that? I never would have thought…" her giggle softened the mood.
"I guess I am." I smiled crookedly.
She shook her head as her expression changed. "It means I want more of you. I know I don't feel exactly the same way as you but I know I feel something other than you just being my best friend." It wasn't perfect but it was enough for me.
In less than a second my lips were on hers again and I was fully hard. She arched her body into mine and straddled me, her chest was flush against mine. My hands roamed down her body until I reached her sex. The sexiest little whimper left her lips when I touched her softly. She was already so wet.
She reached down between us and curled her hand around me, eliciting a deep groan from me. Then she was sinking down onto me so agonizingly slowly. But I knew she had to go slow, she had never felt me this way. I waited until she was ready and she rose up again. She leaned up, a smile spreading across her face. God. She was pure woman.
I let my eyes appreciate her before I even moved my hands. From the swell of her thighs and dark tufts of hair to where we were joined, watching myself disappear inside of her was the most beautiful thing. Her protruding naval, her full breasts bobbed slightly. It was all too perfect. My hands went to her chest, palming her breasts in my hand as I toyed with her nipple. She cried out even louder. I had no doubt the people next door could hear her. Between her loud gasping moans her eyes found mine and I realized I had probably never looked a girl in the eye while we had sex. It was like communicating on a deeper level and I know it only felt like that because it was Jennie.
I lifted her off me, she pouted with a soft whimper as I laid her on her side. My chest pressed against her back and I entered her again. She gasped and bucked her hips with mine as I found a steady rhythm. She craned her neck and found my lips. I kissed her deeply, our tongues tangling as we moved together.
I reached around her and circled her clit softly. She moaned into my mouth. Her hand reached around and gripped my ass. She broke away and sighed deeply, her moans getting louder and louder. I knew she was close.
"Lisa… Lisa…" she breathed. Then she cried out as her body seized in pleasure.
I held her closer as I moved inside of her faster. I buried my face in her neck and she turned her lips to my ear.
"Come for me Lisa."
Yes, fucking ma'am. That was it. I stilled inside of her as I came harder than before.
I stayed frozen inside of her until I could breathe like a normal person. I eased out of her and she turned to face me. I kissed her again softly and she nuzzled closer to me. When she pulled away I saw fresh tears in her eyes.
"What's wrong, Cheesecake?"
She shook her head as she sniffed. A sad smile found her face.
"I just… I'm going to miss you so much—when I go to New York. I don't know if…" I wiped her tears with my thumb.
"We can still see each other. It will be just like when we went off to college."
She shook her head again. "Things are different now… by then we'll have been dating and—and it will just be harder."
I saw it then when I looked in her eyes. Filling with tears. I couldn't leave her either. And for what? More sunlight? Fuck no.
"It's going to be fine. I promise."
Her brows furrowed as she stared at me. "How do you know that?" She made a face as a smile stole my face. I don't know if I was smiling so much from my orgasms or the happiness I seemed to find in the last hour. But it was a big fucking smile.
"Because NYU has a great medical school."
..
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