Lee leaned in, his eyes sparkling as he continued with his impossible tale of derring-do.
"So, luckily, Dave Sacks was packing a copy of Nature Life. It's his favorite Scandinavian nudist colony mag… I'm telling you, what can I say? The guy is weird. But believe it or not, we traded it for two camels, an old Mauser and three days' worth of dried sheep stomach…" He caught Amanda's expression and laughed. "You're not buying any of this, are you?"
Amanda smiled. "Not very much of it."
"All right, all right. Enough of my convoluted stories," Lee grinned back at her. His voice dropped seductively and he took her hand. "What do you say we… just go back to my place and have some dessert, huh?"
There was no denying what he was proposing – or perhaps propositioning was the better word for it - but Amanda was already feeling the late hour and that last glass of Chablis. Tempting as it was, if they went back to Lee's, it would be well after midnight by the time she got home.
"It's awful late," she demurred. "And we have to be at work early…"
"I know, I know," said Lee. He did his best to hide his disappointment, but Amanda knew him better than that – and felt the same.
"What are we going to do?" she asked, hiding her mood just about as successfully.
Lee could tell from her tone that if he cajoled her a little more, she'd give in, but he could also see the shadows under her eyes that told their own tale of how tired she was. She'd been subdued all through dinner and he knew she'd been running herself ragged getting everything ready at work and at home so that they could get away on their honeymoon with nothing to worry them. "The same thing we always do," he said. "Go home alone. Again." He tapped her engagement ring as if it was a good luck talisman. "But only for one more week."
The quick quirk up of his lips as he spoke told her he was looking forward to their honeymoon as much as she was. Rest, relaxation – and nothing and no one getting in their way of spending every moment together.
Relieved that he understood, Amanda nodded. "Alright. I'll give you a lift."
Lee shook his head. "No, no, no. Um, listen. I'm only a couple of blocks away. I think I'll take a walk. I need to do some thinking. Hmm?"
"Not about anything serious, I hope?" she asked, squeezing his fingers.
"Nothing serious at all," he replied. "Just that counterintelligence stuff I'm leading this week. I think better when I'm walking."
So I've noticed," she grinned at him. "You've already worn a path on the Q Bureau floor with all your pacing." Her eye fell on their hands, where Lee was still playing gently with her ring. "I guess I should take that off before I go. Last time, I almost walked into the house wearing it – I can only imagine what Mother would have said."
"I like to think it would have been 'congratulations"," Lee teased her.
"Of course it would," she said. "And then a whole lot more stuff with her trying to plan a wedding to beat Charles and Di's." She slipped off the ring and handed it to him, both of them grimacing at the necessity. "You can keep it with the wedding rings after you pick them up."
Lee slipped it into an inside pocket and they both sighed. Next week suddenly seemed a long time away.
"I'm just going to go to the ladies' room while you pay the bill, okay?" said Amanda standing up. "I'll be right back."
Lee nodded and motioned to the waiter for the check.
A few minutes later, she was standing in front of the bathroom mirror, reapplying her lipstick, when another woman emerged from one of the cubicles and came to stand at the sink beside her. As she washed her hands, their eyes met in the mirror and the woman opened her mouth as if she was going to say something, but then closed it again. Intrigued, Amanda kept eye contact and almost immediately, the other woman's resolve broke.
"I'm so sorry," she said. "I saw what happened and I don't know why and I hope that maybe it can still be worked out, because you both just looked so sad as if it was entirely the wrong thing to be doing and maybe you have a good reason, but my gosh, I just hope that wasn't the end."
Amanda blinked in the face of a ramble that could have outdone one of her own.
"I… what?" she asked. "I'm sorry, I don't understand what you're trying to say."
The other woman was looking mortified. "No, I'm sorry, it's none of my business! It's just that, well, I saw you give the ring back to your fiancé – or ex-fiancé, I guess – and up until then you had just looked like the most perfect loving couple and I was so jealous that you had such a beautiful relationship and such a handsome man, and then suddenly you're handing him back his ring and I could have just cried, you know?"
"Oh!" Amanda was silent for a moment, thinking back to the scene at the table and how it could have been interpreted by anyone nearby. "Oh no, no! We're still together. I was just giving him the ring because…" She thought fast. "Because it needs cleaning before the ceremony next week and he lives closer to the jeweler than I do."
"Oh, thank goodness!" exclaimed the woman. "I feel so foolish now, but I'm so happy to hear that! I know I'm a silly romantic, but I want everyone to find their knight in shining armor, you know? I'm still looking because after watching you two across the room I've realized that the guy I'm with tonight is definitely not mine." She made a wry face. "But now I'm just babbling and keeping you away from your fella. And the only thing worse than wasting your time on a relationship that isn't going to work is wasting it not getting to enjoy every minute of a good one, you know what I mean?"
"I do," Amanda nodded. "I feel the same way and Lee's definitely my white knight."
"You're so lucky," said the other woman wistfully.
"I know," Amanda nodded. "I'm the luckiest woman in the world."
She made her way back to the table, ready to tell Lee the story of that encounter, but he was chatting with the waiter and by the time that was done, and they'd collected their coats from the coat check and headed outside, the entire thing had slipped her mind.
They walked to her wagon, hand in hand, both lost in their own thoughts. When they reached it, Lee opened the door and helped her in.
"Sure, I can't give you a lift home?" she asked again. "It's pretty late."
"Worried about me?" he teased, giving her a quick chuck under the chin. "Amanda, I'm perfectly fine to walk home and besides, it's in the opposite direction from where you're headed." He leaned into the car and gave her a long kiss. "Now off you go, before your mother starts to worry." He closed her door for her and tapped the roof of the car before stepping back.
Amanda started the car, but didn't move right away, pausing instead to watch Lee striding off across the parking lot. It took her a moment to pinpoint what was bothering her – that Lee usually stayed and watched her pull out of the lot, waving goodbye as she did so. Tonight, he'd been quiet since she'd turned down his invitation and hadn't waited to see her safely underway.
"He does have a lot on his mind," she mused. "But…" His words from dinner came back to her.
I need to do some thinking.
"That didn't sound like he was thinking about his meetings at all", she fretted. All too clearly, she could see his look of disappointment when she handed him the ring, signifying the end of their evening as a recognized couple. "Not that I rejected him," she told herself, "but I suppose he might think… but what could he have to think about unless…" She gave herself a shake. "No, Amanda, you're being ridiculous. Lee's not going to be angry with you over a request for an early night. It's like he said – we always do this. Go home alone. Again."
Even just saying the words out loud made them hit home harder than they had earlier. She glanced at the clock gleaming in the darkness of her dashboard.
"It's already past 10," she told herself. "The boys are fast asleep, Mother's probably lost in a book… you've been out later than this a million times on a case – why are you suddenly worried about a late night? You're an adult, Amanda – act like one!"
Her mind made up, she pulled out of the parking place and onto the street – turning towards Lee's townhouse instead of Arlington. He hadn't had that much of a head start, she reasoned, so she should be able to spot him easily. It was at that exact moment that she did – and to her horror, it was because he was being attacked by a gang of at least four men.
Pressing down on the accelerator and her horn at the same time, she raced to his rescue.
"Lee!" she called out as the men scattered. To her relief, she could see him pulling himself back up, but it was obvious he was hurt. "Are you alright?" she asked, falling to the ground beside him. She ran a hand over his head, feeling him wince. "Oh my gosh!"
"They came out of nowhere," Lee groaned, feeling around his coat. "They got my wallet. They got—"
"Alright, we've got to get you to the hospital," Amanda interrupted him.
"No, I don't want… Amanda, I don't need to go to a hospital."
"You've got a bump on your head. You might have a concussion," she contradicted him.
"No, I don't want to go to a hospital. I don't like doctors, okay?" Despite his protests, he groaned and leaned back against her. "I will take a ride home, though," he said through the gritted teeth.
"Yeah, okay," she said, helping him to his feet. She looked him over, brushing some of the dust off his coat. "Are you sure you won't get checked out? It would make me feel better."
"But I'd feel worse," he countered. "Amanda, I've had harder knocks than this- I'll be fine, I just need a hot shower and a soft bed."
Amanda suspected he was just putting a brave face on it though, since he leaned on her more than usual as they moved to her car. This time it was her opening the door and letting him settle before closing the door and walking around to the driver's seat. Lee leaned back against the headrest with another groan.
"Are you sure?..." she started.
"I'm sure, Amanda," he snapped. "Just take me home, okay?"
Against her better judgement, she did as he asked, pulling up at the townhouse a few minutes later.
"Okay, thanks," he said, turning to get out of the car as she pulled up. "I'll see you in the morning."
"Don't be ridiculous," she said crisply. "You're not getting rid of me that easily. I'm coming in."
"Okay," he capitulated instantly, confirming her belief that he was in more pain than he was letting on.
"There we go," she said a few minutes later, helping him take off his coat as they entered the apartment. "You sit. I'm going to go grab you some aspirin."
Lee nodded, but when she came out of the bathroom, he had followed her into the bedroom and was slowly pulling off his tie.
"Do you want me to run that shower for you?" she asked, putting down the tablets and glass of water and helping him out of his suit jacket.
"No, I'm just going to go to bed," he said, starting to unbutton his shirt.
"Okay," she nodded. "I'm going to go call Mother and tell her I'll be late."
Lee gave her a tired grin. "Guess I lured back to my place after all," he said.
"No luring was even required," she admitted. "I was coming to look for you anyway and then I saw those guys swarm you. Now take these –" she handed him the glass and pills – "and I'll be back in a minute."
Lee could hear her quietly explaining her tardiness to her mother as he continued undressing.
"No Mother, don't wait up. I don't know how long I'll be… These things can go on for hours..."
He wondered what her excuse had been for tonight's outing – usually he asked at some point, but he'd forgotten. Sometimes she just told Dotty she was going out with him, but not every time – sometimes she let her think it was work, or sometimes, like tonight apparently, some kind of event. He knew why – as far as the family knew, they'd only been dating a few months and while it was ridiculous, he knew, that they worried about appearing too close even as they planned to marry, Amanda had been adamant about letting the relationship with the family develop at a natural pace. He winced as he pulled on his pajama pants, not just from a residual ache brought on from crashing to the sidewalk, but also at the secrecy of their upcoming wedding. Nothing on earth would make Dotty happier, he knew, than to see Amanda happily married again, and not for the first time, he deeply regretted the need to keep her family in the dark.
"Just one more week," he told himself. "Then we'll figure out what to do next."
Amanda reappeared, moving around him to turn down the covers on the bed and pick up his clothes from the floor where he'd dropped them. He pulled on a t-shirt, unable to hide another wince of pain, and she crossed immediately to run her hands along his upper arms.
"The aspirin should kick in soon," she murmured, looking at him worriedly. "You lie down and I'll get another glass of water for your bedside table."
He caught her hand as she turned away. "Stay awhile?" he asked.
"Of course," she nodded.
He lowered himself onto the bed and lay back, watching her through half-closed eyes as she brought him the glass of water, then finished hanging up his suit. "Amanda," he wheedled, patting the bed beside him. "Stop puttering around and sit with me."
She came with no hesitation, kicking off her shoes and climbing up to lie alongside him, on top of the covers. She put her hand on his chest, her eyes studying his for a long moment. "Your pupils look normal," she announced.
"So romantic," he chuckled. "I get you in here and the only bedroom eyes you're interested in are ones with no sign of concussion."
"You know I worry," she said, slapping him feather-lightly on his chest. "Only a week to go and then it will be my right to boss you around any way I want, whether you like it or not."
"I always like it when you boss me around," he grinned.
She rolled her eyes and kissed him, before snuggling down with her head on his shoulder, his arm coming up naturally to encircle her.
"So you changed your mind, huh?" he asked. "Can't say I mind."
"Changed my mind about what?" she lifted her head, looking startled. "The wedding? Of course, I haven't!"
"Of course, not the wedding," he said, equally surprised by her reaction. "About coming back here. You said you were coming to look for me back there."
"Oh!" Amanda sagged in relief. "Yes, I was. I didn't like how we left it."
Lee struggled to remember the conversation. "How we left it?"
"I was in mom-mode – all 'it's getting late and you have school in the morning' kind of stuff and after what that woman in the bathroom said, I guess I just started to worry about what it was you had to think about," she confessed.
"The woman in the bathroom?" Lee knew he'd taken a hard hit to the head, but he was fairly certain this was the first he'd heard about any woman, in the bathroom or otherwise.
Amanda's brow wrinkled, then cleared as she remembered she'd never told him. "When I went to the ladies' room, there was a woman in there who'd seen me hand you my engagement ring and she thought we were breaking up." Her eyes widened and she sat up. "Oh my gosh! The ring! It's still in your suit!"
She slipped off the bed and over to his closet, dipping her hand in and retrieving her precious diamond before coming back to the bed to lie back down. She reached across him to put it on the bedside table, but Lee blocked her.
"Put it back on," he said. "It might be bad luck not to put it back on after someone says something like that."
Amanda used her position to give him another quick kiss, then leaned back, slipping it onto her ring finger and resting her hand back on his chest where they could both admire it.
"So, what did that woman say that got you worried?" asked Lee. "You knew we hadn't broken up."
"I'm not sure," Amanda said slowly. "I told her we hadn't and made some excuse about you taking it to be cleaned before the wedding and then…" she thought back. "Then she said something about not wasting time on a bad relationship or a good one."
"Good advice," Lee commented, giving her a squeeze.
"It was," she agreed. "But after we said goodnight and you said you had stuff to think about…"
"You thought I wasn't sure about us? Amanda, c'mon on! You're the only thing in my life I am sure of!"
"No, no," she soothed him. "I didn't really think that. It was just that I knew how disappointed you were when I said no to extending the evening – and I was disappointed too – and I guess I just wanted to catch up with you and tell you that."
Lee pulled her closer and kissed her temple. "You never disappoint me, Amanda. Although to be honest, I was fibbing a bit about how I was only worried about tomorrow's meetings. There's something else I was going to talk to you about."
Amanda lifted her head so she could see his face clearly, hers now worried.
"Billy passed me another memo about a management job. More desk time, so probably more family time too. But I just don't feel like I'm done with being in the field, you know?"
"I know," she nodded. "It would be a really big step, but how seriously are you thinking about it?"
He gazed at her, relieved that the look of worry had been washed away. "Pretty seriously. It would mean we might be able to be more open about our relationship, and I know I'll have to make that move some day, but for now…" he sighed. "That woman was absolutely right. Any time I don't spend with you is wasted time."
"I feel the same," she whispered, smoothing a hand over his t-shirt.
"Anyway, that's all I wanted to think about – I wanted to have my own feelings on it clearer before I brought it up since it affects both of us. It's pretty tempting, I'll admit but ask me again in the morning when my head doesn't hurt so much," he chuckled.
"I will," she promised, "But it'll have to be at the office, because you know I still can't stay tonight, right? I just needed to make sure you got home safe and were feeling better."
"I know," he said comfortably. "We do have to be at work early." His face lit up with a grin. "And who'd have thought I'd be the first one to say 'Not tonight, Dear, I've got a headache'?"
Amanda gave a small laugh, then her brow furrowed. "Are you sure you shouldn't have that checked out?"
"No, I'm fine," he insisted. "They didn't hit my head that hard – they just got a few lucky punches in and they might have broken a rib." At her expression, he held up a finger. "And you know as well as I do, there's nothing you can do for that except wait it out."
Amanda nodded. "I'm sorry – I'm mothering you again, aren't I?
"Nah," he smiled at her. "You're just being you – and reminding me how lucky I am to have you."
"Same here," she replied.
Anyway, the aspirin is kicking in and-", he paused to yawn, "I just need to sleep it off."
"Okay," she said, starting to sit up.
Lee's arms tightened around her. "But not just yet, huh? Stay a little while longer? Please?"
His soft smile in the dim light of the bedside lamp told her he remembered the moment last year when he'd asked her to stay under similar circumstances.
"Yeah, of course, I'll stay," she said. "I'll stay as long as you need me."
"So forever then?" he teased.
"Yeah, forever," she confirmed, nestling back against him.
They rested in silence, content just to be close. She could hear his steady heartbeat under her cheek and feel the soft stroke of his fingertips along her arm.
"I worry about that sometimes," she said suddenly.
"You worry about forever?" asked Lee, concerned.
"No, I worry sometimes that it's been so long that I've only been a mother, I've forgotten how to be a wife."
Lee chuckled and gave her a squeeze. "Oh. that's not going to be a problem."
"You seem pretty certain of that," she said.
"I am," he replied. "Because I don't want a wife – I want a partner and a best friend and a lover - and you're already those to me; that's not going to change. Besides, if anyone should be worried, it's me – you've been a wife, but I've never been a husband."
Amanda shifted to kiss him. "I guess we'll just muddle through it together," she said.
"But you know, if you are worried about whether I'm really all right..."
Amanda lifted her brow questioningly, her lips twitching in response to the impish smile on his face.
"I'm sure it would help if you kissed it better," he finished in a seductive tone.
Amanda laughed and pulled him over for a long passionate - and decidedly unmaternal - kiss.
"I love you," she said when they finally pulled apart.
"Love you too."
"Now sleep – you have a long day tomorrow."
Lee fell back on his pillow without demur and as his eyes drifted closed, she reached to run a finger over the furrow of pain on his forehead. When the crease remained, even after he'd fallen asleep, Amanda made a silent decision. Call it Mom-mode or wife-mode, either one, she was going to go talk to Billy first thing in the morning.