Holding Neal's hand, Peter could feel the warmth of it and the only thing he could think about was that how someone who looked that lifeless could have such a warm hand. It's been a few hours since he got the call from the prison warden about Neal. About his attempted suicide... the word was so dark and bitter to Peter's ears even without saying it aloud. He could hear his heart shatter into million pieces and he was damn sure that he could never find some of those pieces ever again. How has it gotten to this point? How can someone's life go like this? Was it just one decision that lead to this much sadness or a chain of events that each followed each other mercilessly to get to this point? And then, how all of these was happening to him again? He felt embarrassed about making Neal's situation about himself but he couldn't help thinking it's all happening again. When he first got the call, he imagined Neal's face and for a few seconds, he looked like just his brother's Jimmy's. That's why he has been sitting next to his bed and thanking any God he could think of that a guard found Neal just in time. Well, the next best "just in time" since what could have been like if someone had found him when he was younger or when he needed the help the most. That could have been the best "just in time". But this was life and nothing about it was fair. The doctor had told him he would wake up and the danger was over. But Peter was more worried about what would be next for him. He couldn't expect Neal to just bounce off this one. That would be foolish and naïve, wouldn't it?
Looking at Neal's unconscious form, Peter desperately hoped that he was a religious person that could pray for him, pray for him to find his peace again or his path or whatever a human is supposed to find in his lifetime, he guessed. But for better or worse, he wasn't a religious person and he didn't believe in any God. Some would say if you don't believe in God or heaven or hell for that matter, how could you think this world could be any fair? Who would make sure that justice was served? But that was it, wasn't it?
Peter always thought since there is no God, the humans were the ones responsible to alleviate the pain of other humans suffering. They were the ones that HAD to do something. Since when you see someone in pain, you can't just sit around and pray for them in hopes of someone would eventually help them and you had done your part. No. It's not that easy but at the same time, his belief, or rather a disbelief brought him peace too. Since that made HIM in control. All of that made him think of a plan and he spent the next few hours talking on the phone outside Neal's room and talking to whoever he could think of that can help with his newly formed plan, starting with Hughes. If he promised any favors in return or not, that would always stay between him and the cold hallways of that prison.