DISCLAIMER: Standard disclaimer applies. We don't own the Thunderbirds. Neither are we making any money off this endeavor.

Chapter 7 – ONE SIDED CONVERSATIONS

Brains and Scott were both at John's bedside immediately.

"What happened?" Scott demanded while trying to help his father hold John down.

"He's having an al-al-al-reaction to one of the meds." Brains said.

Gordon ran to the medicine locker and began to pull out the medicines and supplies that Brains was calling for.

"Has he had these meds before?" Jeff asked in frustration.

"Of c-c-c-yes he has." Brains answered as he gave John medicine to try to stop the convulsions. "He has never r-r-r-had a reaction like this."

"Then why is he having a reaction now?" Scott questioned.

"It must be a reaction to the com-com-poison and the meds." Brains tried to explain while still working on John.

"What the hell happened?" Virgil demanded as he came into the middle of the chaos.

"Virgil, get T-T-Tin-Tin." Brains ordered.

Virgil raced back to the lab. In less than two minutes, Tin-Tin had arrived and began assisting Brains. It took seven minutes for the convulsion to finally subside. Although to the Tracys, it seemed like an eternity. Once the convulsion was over, John slipped into a "dead-to-the-world" sleep.

Brains drew some more blood. "I will try to de-de-ascertain which meds caused the con-con-seizure. We don't want this to ha-ha-ha-be repeated. I will be in the lab. C-C-C-send for me if any more problems ar-ar-come up."

"Is he going to be OK?" Jeff asked in a quiet tone.

Brains' heart broke for Jeff. "I'm sorry. I d-d-can't give you any answers r-r-r-at this time."

Jeff gave Brains a nod of understanding while rubbing his hand over his face. "Thanks Brains." He said. Jeff looked at his other sons. "We need to set up a rotation to sit with John. We can take four hour shifts."

"I'll take the first shift Dad." Virgil volunteered.

Jeff looked at his son. "OK Virgil, if that's what you want." Virgil nodded his head so Jeff continued. "The rest of us should get something to eat and then some rest.'

The boys somberly nodded their heads and headed toward the door. Gordon paused and asked Virgil, "Do you want anything from the kitchen?"

Virgil sighed. "Maybe just some coffee. I'm not really hungry."

Gordon nodded his head. "I understand. I feel the same way. I'll be back shortly." He said as he left the infirmary.

Virgil moved his chair closer to his brother's bed. He picked up John's limp hand and began to talk quietly to him. "John, I don't know if you can hear me, but I want you to know that I love you. I know we don't say the words that often. It isn't macho. If there was anyway that I could stop what is happening, I would. I hate seeing you in this much pain. I just feel so helpless."

Virgil felt John's hand tighten around his. "John? Can you hear me?" He questioned, but John's eyes remained shut. Virgil felt tears welling up in his eyes. He tried to brush them away, but the tears were building faster than he could wipe them away. "Oh God John." He choked out. He laid his head on his brother's bed and let the tears flow. He sobbed out the fear and emotional upheaval that had been building for the last two days.

Gordon stood outside the infirmary with the coffee and listened to his brother's harsh sobs. He had to fight his own tears. He turned and headed back to the kitchen. There was no way that he was going to embarrass Virgil by walking in on him in that state.

Scott was the only one in the kitchen when he returned. He noticed the coffee pot still in Gordon's hand. "I thought you were taking the coffee to Virgil."

"Uhm, yeah." Gordon stumbled for an explanation. "But then I decided to take him some food. He needs to eat even if he isn't hungry." Gordon grabbed a tray and started to lay out a light meal.

Scott could tell that Gordon was hiding something. "Are you sure that's all it is?"

"Sure Scott," Gordon replied forcing a smile to his face. "What else would it be?"

Scott knew how stubborn Gordon could be. He knew that if he tried to force the issue, Gordon would clam up even more. "If you ever want to talk, I'm always ready to listen. You know that, don't you?"

"Of course Scott." Gordon said. "I hope you know that the offer goes both ways."

Scott nodded and smiled. "Do you want me to take the tray to Virgil?"

Gordon shook his head. "No, I'll do it. Besides you have the next shift, you had better get some rest." He grabbed the now full tray and headed back to the infirmary, hoping that Virgil had pulled himself together by now.

Four hours later, Scott relieved Virgil. "Any change?" He asked.

"Not really," Virgil replied. "He's moved around a bit in his sleep. He even opened his eyes a couple of times, but they were glassed-over and he seemed disoriented."

"OK, I'll take over from here." He said. "Did you eat anything?"

"A little bit." Virgil replied.

"Good, then why don't you try to get some rest?" Scott suggested.

"All right, but I want you to let me know if there is any change." Virgil replied.

Scott nodded and Virgil left the room. He sat in the chair that had been vacated by Virgil and in a similar gesture picked up John's hand and held it in his own.

"Hey John." He said watching for any indication that John had heard him. Receiving none, he continued his one-sided conversation. "Everybody is really worried about you right now. Dad keeps telling us to rest but I know that he's not. I'm kind of worried about him. I know that he is blaming himself. Hell, we are all feeling guilty." Scott's voice choked with emotion, but he cleared his throat and continued. "I'm really sorry that this is happening to you. I would do anything if I could switch places with you, but you know the old saying, 'If wishes were horses…' You've got to fight this John. Please fight. Don't give up."

Scott could feel his emotions building again, so he decided to change topics slightly. "Do you remember the last time that I carried on a one-sided conversation with you? It was when I went to the hospital to see you that time when you had pneumonia. Do you remember? You were what? Nine? No you must have been ten because I was twelve. I was the only one old enough to go visit you. Virgil was really mad. At the age of eight, he hated being told that he was too young to do things." Scott smiled at the memories of when he and his brothers were younger. "Gordon though, his reaction was the best. Mom had stayed at the hospital with you, but dad had come home to let us know what was going on. When he told us that you had to stay in the hospital, Gordon wanted to know if you were getting a new baby. After all, the only person that he knew who had gone to the hospital was mom when she had Alan. I guess he equated going to the hospital with having a baby." Scott began to chuckle. "You should have seen the look on dad's face. He had been so worried about you and then here was Gordon asking a seemingly innocent question about babies. It really helped ease some of the tension." Scott sobered again. "I wish that we had something now to ease the tension."

Scott leaned in close to his brother. "You have to fight John. Brains is working non-stop to find an antidote. You just have to hang on until he finds it. I know that a lot of times it seems we take you for granted, but I'm telling you right now, YOU are a very important part of this family. You are our confidant, our anchor. We need you, John. I need you, John. Please, for me, hang on. I love you John." Scott took a deep breath as a lone tear made its way down his face.

When Gordon reached the infirmary to relieve Scott, he found Scott still talking to a sleeping John, recounting their childhood memories.

"Do you remember the time that Gordon told Alan…" Scott was saying but stopped when he saw Gordon. "Uh…Hi, Gordon. Is my shift over already?"

"Yeah, it is." Gordon replied. "How's he doing?"

"He's been pretty quiet.' Scott replied as he stood up from the chair. "He moved and groaned a bit but nothing else."

Gordon sighed as he sat in the vacated chair. "Scott?" He questioned. "Do you really think Brains can find a cure?"

"Of course he will." Scott said.

Turning to face his oldest brother, he asked. "How can you be so sure?" Even as he asked the question, he could see the doubt that crossed Scott's face.

"I don't think that this is the time or place to be discussing this." Scott said cocking his head toward the bed.

Gordon nodded his head to indicate that he understood Scott's meaning. "Can we talk later?"

"Sure, just come and find me." Scott said. "Oh, and let me know right away if there is any change." Then he left the room.

Gordon sat in the chair and stared at his brother. He was at a loss for what to do. He knew that Scott and Virgil had spent their time talking to John, but he couldn't think of what to say to his ill brother. So instead, he bowed his head and began to pray.

Dear God,

I know that it's been awhile since I've prayed to you. I know there are people who would berate me for only praying in times of extreme need, but I don't care. My brother needs your intervention. He was poisoned and is dying. He doesn't deserve this, God. You know what a wonderful, caring person John is. Please help him. Help Brains as he tries to develop a cure, or if you want to perform a miracle healing, I won't mind. Please God, I'll do anything to save my brother. I'll become a better person. I promise. I'll pray more. I'll even start going to church. I'm not sure how I can work it out logistically, but I'll find a way. Please God, please, for my brother's sake."

Tears began to fall from Gordon's eyes. He picked up John's hand. He raised his eyes to the ceiling and continued his prayer.

Please, I'm begging for my brother's life. Please, I mean it. I'll do anything. I'll be nicer to my brothers. I'll help them whenever they ask. I'll even stop the jokes. I'm that serious God, no more practical jokes…

"Don't." A quiet voice interrupted Gordon.

Gordon looked down into his brother's half-opened, pain-filled eyes. "John! You're awake." He exclaimed, although he was confused by John's remark.

John winced. "Not so loud.' He told his younger brother.

"Oh sorry." Gordon said in a quieter voice. "Can you stay awake for awhile? Dad wants to see you. I think the drug reaction that you had really scared him.'

This time it was John who was confused by Gordon's statement, but he figured that he could ask later. "Yeah, I'd like to see dad." He said.

"Ok, I'll let him know that you're awake." Gordon said as he keyed the comm.-link and let both Jeff and Scott know that John was awake. Turning back to John, he asked. "Do you need something? Is there anything that I can do for you?"

"Yeah, don't give up your jokes." John said in a weak voice.

"What?" Gordon asked.

"When I…" John cleared his throat and began again in a slightly stronger tone. "When I woke up, you were saying something about giving up your jokes. You can't." John took a deep breath but winced as a sharp pain cut across his chest.

"John!" Gordon said in alarm.

"I'm…OK," John gasped as he fought to bring his breathing back under control. "Oh God, that wasn't a smart thing to do. Can you help raise the bed?" He asked his voice soft and breathy.

"Sure," Gordon replied as he helped raise the bed. "Better?" He asked.

"Yes, thanks Gordon." John said. "But back to you. Your jokes are a big part of who you are. If you stop playing jokes, it would change your whole personality. I don't want that to happen. Promise me, OK Gordon."

"OK John, I promise." Gordon said with a sigh.

"Good," John said with a small smile. "Because it would be boring here without your jokes."

Gordon made a face. "Thanks, I think." He said with a small laugh. John joined in with a laugh of his own. That's how Jeff found them a few minutes later.

"John," Jeff said relief evident in his voice. "It's so good to see you awake."

"Thanks Dad." John said. "But what happened?"

Jeff ran a hand over his face. "Apparently, the poison Franklin created reacted with the painkiller that Brains gave you…badly. You ended up having a convulsion."

"Just great." John said sarcastically.

"Well Brains did a few tests," Jeff explained. "He found out that it was the painkiller that caused the reaction. The medicine for the vomiting was OK so you've been getting a steady dose of that through your IV. He also found out that acetaminophen and ibuprofen were also OK. Brains has been giving you alternate doses. It won't kill the pain entirely, but it should take some of the edge off."

"Well, at least that's something. Any news on an antidote?" John asked.

"Not yet," Jeff said with a sigh. "When we got back, Brains said that it would be between 24 and 36 hours before we knew anything. It's only been a little over sixteen hours, so we still have some time to wait."

"Well at least I won't be puking." John said with a small smile.

Scott entered the sickroom. "Hey, John. It's good to see you awake."

John gave Gordon a wry look. Motioning toward Scott, he said. "Jeff Jr. hey?"

John and Gordon broke into a fit of giggles. Seeing the confused look on Jeff's and Scott's face caused them to laugh even harder.

John pulled himself into a ball. "Stop…stop…it hurts."

Gordon sobered immediately. He got right in front of John's face. "Look at me. Concentrate on your breathing. In…out…in…out. Not too deep. Nice and even. That's it."

Slowly John's pain receded and he lay back on the bed.

"I'm sorry, John." Gordon said.

"It's not your fault. I made the joke." John replied, pain still etched on his face.

"I still should have known better, and I'm sorry." Gordon said. "Can I get you something? Something to eat or drink, maybe?"

"Maybe some apple juice," John replied. "Nothing to eat. Even though I am on medicine, I really don't feel like testing my stomach."

"OK, I'll be back in a few minutes." Gordon said as he headed for the door.

"Thanks, Gordy." John said.

After Gordon left the room, John turned to Scott. "Could you go talk to Gordon? He's trying to hide it, but I can tell that he is having a hard time with this."

Scott looked uncertain for a moment. "Sure John, I'll see what I can do." He said as he left the room.

Jeff shook his head as he sat in the chair next to the bed. "You amaze me John. You are so sick, yet you are still in tune with your brother's feelings."

"Practice." John said. "Just like I can tell that you're blaming yourself for this. It's not your fault."

"John, I…it's just…" Jeff cleared his throat. "I am responsible. I started International Rescue to help people, but now it may cost me my son."

"Hey, I thought you were the one that said not to give up, to have faith in Brains." John said. "Besides, we all knew that there were dangers involved when we joined International Rescue. I knew the risks, and I accepted them. So stop beating yourself up about this."

Jeff smiled at John. "You're right. We can't give up. Brains is a brilliant scientist and I'm sure that he will come through for us. How'd you get so smart anyways?"

John smiled back at Jeff. "I had a great role model."

Just as Scott entered the kitchen, he heard a glass break and a muttered, "Dammit." As he came farther into the kitchen, he saw Gordon kneeling on the floor next to one of the counters. "Gordon?" He asked.

Gordon jumped when he heard Scott's voice, in the process cutting his hand. "God, Scott, you startled me." He said as he jumped up and grabbed a clean towel and pressed it to the cut.

"Sorry," Scott said as he crossed the kitchen. Grabbing Gordon by the shoulders, he steered him to the table. Forcing him into a chair, he continued. "Here, sit down. I'll be right back to help you clean that cut."

Scott quickly cleaned up the broken glass and grabbed the first aid kit. He sat down at the table. "Let me see your hand." He said as he opened the first aid kit. Gordon extended his arm so Scott could have access to his hand. Pulling out an antiseptic wipe he meet Gordon's eyes. "This is going to sting."

"Just do it." Gordon said. He hissed in pain as Scott began to clean out the cut.

"It doesn't look too bad. More like a deep scratch." Scott said. "I'm still going to bandage it just so that it doesn't get infected."

"It's my own fault." Gordon groused. "Shouldn't have been so clumsy."

"Hey, we've all been there. It's nothing to be ashamed of." Scott said as he wrapped the bandage around Gordon's hand. "You know you've been a big help with John. That breathing thing has really helped him deal with the pain. Where'd you learn that?"

Gordon shrugged. "Do you remember when I broke my ribs during that pick-up football game in high school?"

Scott nodded. "You didn't just break your ribs. You punctured your lung and you suffered a severe concussion. Dad was frantic when the hospital called and said that you needed surgery to repair your lung. I had to fly him there because he was too upset."

Gordon rolled his eyes. "I asked if you remembered it. I didn't need it rehashed. Anyways, it was something they showed me in the hospital. The nurse said it had the same basis as Lamaze. If you can control your breathing, it can help manage the pain. I still do it when I get hurt and it helps. I just figured it would help John too."

"Well, you were right." Scott said, pausing a moment and looking Gordon over. "He's worried about you."

Gordon looked Scott in the eye. "Huh?"

"John. He's worried about you." Scott explained. "He asked me to come and talk to you."

"He shouldn't be worrying about me." Gordon snapped. "He's the one that's sick. He's the one who's…" He stopped as his voice cracked with emotion.

"It's OK, Gordon." Scott said softly. "We're all worried about John. It's just that the rest of us have had more time to deal with it. We had to watch it while we were held captive."

Gordon stared down at his hands. He picked at the bandage covering his cut. He refused to meet Scott's eyes.

Scott reached across the table and covered Gordon's hands with his own. "Come on Gordon, talk to me."

"I'm scared Scott." Gordon said in a quiet voice. "I have this horrible feeling that he is going to die. I can't shake it. I know that Brains is working on it, but I still…I can't explain what I'm feeling." Gordon was beginning to ramble and Scott just let him. "I wasn't even this scared when the Hood had us all trapped up on Thunderbird 5 last year. Maybe it was because we were all facing death together. Now it's just John. Why John? Why him? I wish I could trade places with him. Scott, what are we going to do if he…" Gordon couldn't finish the question.

Scott could see the unshed tears in Gordon's eyes. He moved around the table and pulled Gordon into a hug. "We'll deal with this as a family even if…and it's a big if…the worst does happen." Scott could feel Gordon's arms tighten around him.

"Thanks, Scott." Gordon spoke into Scott's embrace. "I guess I just needed to get it off my chest." Pulling back from Scott, he said. "I better get that juice to John."

Scott gave Gordon another quick hug. "OK, but if you need to talk some more, just come and find me."

Gordon nodded his head and he moved to the cupboard to get a fresh glass. "I will…" He was cut off by the sound of the alarm. "Not now." He said, but followed Scott out of the kitchen.

Author's note:

From Convert: Well, Grumpy moaned when I poked her with the stick, so I guess she isn't dead. That's a relief.

That's our John, as sick as he is, he is worried about his family. At least in this chapter he got a little relief. We want to thank everyone who has reviewed. Please keep it up. It really gives us a boost.