Hahaha yes Cal is just a tad bit evil, but we all love him : ) Thanks for the reviews and hope you guys enjoy these next two chapters. Yes TWO oh I was so proud of myself, it took me all day long, but I did it...I just love rainy days, they're excellent for writing.

Oh yes and some historical notes...ONE I mention an incident that happened on the Carpathia with the Duff Gordons...according to some sources this happened, so I base my telling of it on that, even though its not the exact way that it happened.

TWO in the next chapter the Carpathia is arriving in New York. I really don't know what it was like the night they arrived, whether it was inside, or out, or what. So I just wrote it as outside and rainy just like in the movie. If you find any evidence to challenge that I am very sorry for my error :)

But enjoy and keep reviewing! It makes me write more...seriously :)

Love to all and a special prayer for the anniv. of 9-11.

Chapter 26

I made the decision not to tell Harry about anything that had happened between Cal and I; both on the Titanic and the Carpathia. I didn't want to anger him. He seemed be upset enough with the idiocy of the others on board, who seemed to have no feeling about what had happened.

Lord and Lady Duff Gordon, in particular, made his anger reach a boiling point when they gathered a group of first class passengers for a photo, all of them wearing life vests. He asked him what they were doing, and they replied that they wanted a souvenir from the Titanic.

His response was. "If you want a souvenir, you can have the bullet you almost had on Titanic!"

"Harry!" I pulled him away from their stunned faces. "What's wrong with you? You don't talk to people like that."

"They should have more respect for the dead!"

I had to agree with him, but even if I did scold him about the way he handled it, I had to admit there wasn't any other way to do it. I knew those people and it took extremes such as that for them to learn any type of lesson.

I spent all of my time with Harry, Polly and her children. Polly's grief was taking its toll on her and on more than one occasion she would just collapse from it and had to be taken back to her room. I wasn't sure where Estelle had gone, but it left the children with Harry and me. I didn't really mind, being with them and hearing their little giggles and seeing their faces light up at the smallest things warmed my heart.

The farther we traveled away from the where it all had happened the more and more I began to learn. Hannah was no where to be found on any of the lists of survivors, neither were Jimmy, or Mr. Andrews. And even though I had known for a fact already that she was gone; I couldn't find Rose's name either.

Her death left a mixture of sadness and guilt in me. I felt responsible for her death, even though a voice kept telling me there was nothing I could have done, and she was were she wanted to be…with Jack.

My guilt increased when I saw Aunt Ruth in the late afternoon of the 18th. We had been on board for three days and this was the first I had seen of her. She was in the dining room on a sofa with Mrs. Brown sitting next to her. As I saw her there, crying softly, looking as frail as a 100 year old woman, I felt my heart going out to her. It didn't matter what had happened between us before, what mattered was that we had both lost someone we loved, and we were family. We should be together at a time like this.

"Aunt Ruth?" I asked, approaching slowly.

Mrs. Brown looked up and smiled at me, while Aunt Ruth continued to sob on her shoulder.

"You've heard about Rose?" Mrs. Brown asked, patting Aunt Ruth's back in a soothing manner.

I nodded. "How is she?" I asked, indicating Aunt Ruth.

Mrs. Brown shook her head. "Not very good, I'm afraid. She hasn't spoken to anyone in days."

I sat down on the other side of her and tried to get her attention. It was no use. All she did was sit there idly while tears rolled down her face. Mrs. Brown told me I might as well just leave and try again some other time when she was feeling better. I agreed, said good-bye to her and went out to find Harry.

I found him standing out on the deck near the railing, he was talking to another man and I approached them, it was then that I saw that it was the officer from my lifeboat. Harry looked at me and smiled.

"Oh Sarah, there you are…this is Joseph Boxhall." Harry said noticing me.

"We've met." Mr. Boxhall replied and shook my hand. "It's nice to see you again, Sarah."

"And you." I said. When he released my hand I looked at a skeptical Harry and nearly smiled. "He was on my lifeboat." I told him.

"Yes, I didn't realize you were a friend of Lowe's." Mr. Boxhall said.

I almost said, No, I'm his fiancée, but I looked at Harry and suddenly didn't want to. It didn't seem like the right time. Instead I smiled and nodded.

"Yes, I am."

He smiled and nodded and the two of them spoke for a few minutes more before Mr. Boxhall excused himself. Harry and I both said good-bye to him and watched him walk away. Harry then turned to me.

"We're getting to New York tonight."

"Really?"

He nodded. "They'll be transferring me to another ship that will take me back to England."

I felt like I had fallen into that icy water all over again. My heart just stopped, and I couldn't breathe.

"England?" I managed to say.

"England. I'm sure White Star Line will want to speak to all of the crew that survived, especially the officers; Lights, Boxhall, Pittman…myself." he sounded faraway as he spoke, or maybe that was the way I was hearing it.

My eyes fell.

"I want you to come with me."

I looked up. "What?"

"I want you to come back to England with me. We'll get married in my family's church if you want, or anywhere for that matter. I don't really care; I just don't want to leave you behind."

Run away and get married. It sounded like something out of a novel. I looked at Harry's handsome face, his brown eyes showed so much love for me and in the past week I had found myself feeling more for him then I had for anyone before in my life. I did want to marry him, I wanted to be his wife, but there was still the whole inheritance issue to consider and what my family was going to say.

Yet, I wanted to say yes. God, I was practically bursting at the seams as I tried to hold myself back, but the thought of my Grandmother, Grandfather, and my brother was what finally stopped the need to do that. I couldn't marry without them there.

"Harry, I can't…"

"How did I know you were going to say that?"

I shook my head. "I told you my life was complicated."

"Yes, but I thought you had let go all of that when you said you were going to stay with me. Or did you not mean any of it?"

"I did say that, but things have changed."

"Of course they've changed! Hell, we should be in New York right now, I should have already met your family, gotten you a ring…"

"A ring?"

"Well, what the hell did you think I was going to do, make you wear that watch forever?"

I shrugged. "I hadn't really thought about it."

His frustration broke and he suddenly smiled at me. "It was going to be a huge obnoxious stone and I was going to present it to you in a sea of purple flamingos."

I laughed, a truly warm laugh. I hadn't laughed in days and it felt good. He pulled me into his arms and held me tightly next to him.

"You want to hear something strange?"

"What's that?" I asked, not leaving his embrace.

"I thought for sure when I was loading one of the lifeboats that you weren't safe. I had no idea where you were…it was the only time during all of that that I was actually scared. Then I saw this little girl…"

I pulled away from him and looked him the eye. "A little girl?"

"Yeah. She was in the lifeboat I had just lowered, and she caught my eye." he looked far away as he remembered. "Green eyes…nearly like yours, her hair was…"

"Curly." I finished for him.

He nodded. "How did you know?"

"I saw her, in the dining room, after one of the lifeboats had gotten here." I didn't want to tell him that she had suddenly appeared after I had been fearing the worst about him. It seemed a little strange to me.

"Oh, well it was just odd how seeing her made me feel more confident about your safety. Strange how that happens?"

"Yes…" Very strange. I thought for a quick second, thinking of that little girl again and then looked back at Harry. "What's this church like your family goes to?"

He smiled, knowing exactly what I meant by that. "Near the water, tall steeple, a bell…"

"A bell? It sounds like something I'll have to see for myself." I replied with a grin.

"Alright, I have an idea…I'll go back to England and take care of whatever needs to be taken care of there. You come in July or August, tell your family you're returning to school early and come visit me in Wales, just visit that's all, and then after you finish school in the spring, we'll get married. That will give you plenty of time to tell your family about me."

I nodded, agreeing with all of it. "You are sure you want to wait that long?"

He leaned over and kissed me. "I'd wait forever if I had to…I just hope you don't make Me." he replied in a low voice.

I shook my head and kissed him back. "Never." I whispered.