So posting this chapter came later than I thought and I feel soooo bad :) But thank you for all of your wonderful reviews, I love hearing how much you guys enjoy this story

et-spiritus-sancti - I have never seen that movie but I'm going to have to go rent it now, just to see for myself.

Sara- I'm interested to know how you pictured Grandmother. I don't want to be inconsistent with anything so if I've messed up let me know :)

Tipper- Welcome to the story! I love "Olivia" so I'm honored that you think so highly of mine.

Thanks to everyone else for their wonderful reviews, they really keep me going :)

Chapter 29

I woke up the next morning, having slept quite soundly the night before. Something about being in familiar surroundings made me feel more comfortable and peaceful and I had fallen asleep as soon as my eyes had closed.

Nora, a maid of my Grandfather's helped me dress that morning, in an appropriate black dress. Although it was quite pretty with a squared neck, cuffed sleeves and silk belt, it was a mourning dress, and for the next three months it would be all that I wore. When a distant family member passed, that was time allotted for the period of grief, but I felt Rose deserved more.

Thinking about Rose and a black dress, made me think of a moment barely two weeks ago when she came dressed all in black the day we left Southampton. I couldn't help but grin thinking about how stubborn she had been, and then the sadness hit me. I brushed away the tear that rolled down my cheek and tried to be positive, but it was just so hard.

Come on Sarah, be brave and strong, you can do this…

When Nora finished dressing me she swept my hair up simply and pinned it. I wore no jewelry, not that I would have, and went downstairs to breakfast.

My Grandfather was already at his place at the front of the dining room table. The table was quite large, it could seat 20, but it was only myself, my Grandfather and George that would be dining this morning.

"Good Morning, Grandfather." I replied as I entered the dining room.

He looked up from the morning paper a simply "Good Morning," before going back to his reading.

I ignored his lack of emotion and sat down at the table where a place had been set. Martha, another maid came by and put some juice in my glass. George came in not too long after that and we began breakfast.

After breakfast I went to the library to find a book to read. I pulled Oliver Twist off the shelf, but even though it was one of my favorites I couldn't seem to concentrate. I set the book down in my lap and fished inside of my pocket and pulled out Harry's watch.

I ran my fingers across it, tracing the engraving with my fingers. It was so beautiful and such an usual engagement offering, but I loved it all the same. I wondered what kind of man Harry's grandfather had been. Obviously he had a fondness for the sea. This led me to thinking about the rest of his family. He never really mentioned them, in fact he hadn't at all. I wondered if had any brothers or sisters, or if he was an only child. I wondered how they would react to me; if they would like me, love me, or hate me.

I supposed he was thinking the same thing about me.

I myself couldn't really say how my Grandmother and Grandfather would react to him. Grandfather probably wouldn't even let him in the front door, but I knew my Grandmother would be somewhat open minded about him. Money and such didn't bother so, just as long as he was respectable and treated me the same.

And Harry was respectable. He was headstrong and smart. That's right, he was all of that and more and Nan would love him.

"That's a handsome watch you have there."

Startled I turned around and saw George behind me.

"I didn't hear you come in." I replied, trying to regain my composure and slip the watch back into my pocket, but he grabbed it up before I was able to.

"Very handsome indeed." he grinned.

"George give it back!" I leapt up from the chair I had been sitting in and attempted to steal it back but he dashed across the room before I could get it.

"Look a lighthouse…oh and is this real gold?" he said holding it up away from me.

I jumped, reaching for it but missed. Gracious, I felt like I was six years old again and he had taken my china doll.

"Give it to me!"

He grinned roguishly and ran across the room. "Give me? That's not a very polite manner in which you are speaking."

"How about a polite kick to shin?"

"You're a refined lady, you wouldn't dare."

"Are you doubting me?"

He smiled, defeated. "Okay okay, you can have it back." he came over and dangled it playfully over my opened hand before finally dropping it into my palm.

I clutched it tightly, glad to have it back. He sat down on the sofa and propped one leg up on the other and studied me.

"Where did you get that?"

I turned to him. "Someone gave it to me."

"Who?"

"Just someone." I replied sitting down next to him.

"Would I like him?"

I smiled, knowing it was that obvious. "I think so. You both love to torment me."

"A partner in crime, I'm intrigued." he laughed. "Did you meet him at school?"

I shook my head. "No."

"Well, where did you meet him?"

I hesitated. Telling George about Harry might be a good thing, but then again it might not be. He would be the first people in my family besides Rose (and Aunt Ruth) who would know about him. Then I thought about Cal and Aunt Ruth. They both knew and it wouldn't too long before everyone found out. Last night I had decided that I would have to tell them all first and this was my opportunity.

"On the Titanic."

His eyes got wide. "Is he…"

"Oh no! Gracious no. He's just fine."

"Alright then. What's his name, how old is he? You do realize this is the first time that I've ever had to do this so I'm going to be a stickler for detail. I want to know everything."

I smiled. "His name is Harold Lowe and he's 29."

"Good. Where is he from?"

"Wales."

"Now is he some sort of drifter or does he have an occupation?"

"He was the ship's fifth officer."

"Well…" he looked over at me and nodded. "I think its safe to say I'm impressed. Why did he give you his watch?"

I shrugged, lying obviously. This wasn't the right time to tell him about my engagement. "So I never forget him, I guess."

"Don't let Grandfather see that. He'll have this Mr. Lowe's head on a platter. Remember how he reacted when John Conrad asked you to dance at my birthday party last year?"

I did remember. John's father is my Grandfather's lawyer; he had almost been fired because of it.

"He's just going to have to learn to accept it."

George nearly laughed. "The only man he'll accept in your life will have to be a Vanderbilt or an Astor and even then I don't think it would be that easy."

I shifted uncomfortably, knowing what he was said was so obviously true. I need some reassurence.

"What about Nan?"

He shrugged. "Just make sure he doesn't have any skeletons in his closet and that's he been respectable towards you and everything should be alright…" he looked at me and smiled. "…but I think you already knew that." he added.

I nodded, but smiled back. "I just needed to hear it from someone else."

From our place in the library we could hear the definite dong on the front door bell. A few moments later Mrs. Fitzpatrick entered the room and handed me an envelope. "This was just delivered for you, Miss."

"Thank you." I replied and took it from her. As soon as she left, I opened it, George peering over my shoulder the whole time. I opened the slip of paper and read carefully.

It was a subpoena.

"….on the 3rd of May in the year 1912...investigation into the sinking of Titanic…"

"Looks like Grandfather was right."

"Why do they want to speak to me, I don't know anything more than anyone else?"

George shrugged. "Don't worry, they'll probably just ask simple questions. If you witnessed it sink, if the crew was organized…that type of thing."

I shook my head, none of those questions were simple. They poured salt over wounds that hadn't even been given time to heal yet. "It just happened, don't we even get time to heal."

"Political men don't care about things like that. They want answers, Sarah. Over a thousand lives were lost, including our cousins', don't you want to help in anyway you can?"

I did want to help, but at the same time I wasn't ready to relive all that had happened in front of a court room. What if they asked me about Rose? What would I say…or about why it took me so long to get on a lifeboat? How would I explain the situation with Jack.

George, the most wonderful older brother in the entire world, put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me to him and laid my head down on his shoulder.

"It will be alright…don't worry."

He said that with a strong, optimistic voice, but I found it very hard to believe. I just had a horrible sick feeling in the pit of my stomach and a sudden headache. This wasn't fair, none of it; no one should have died. Rose shouldn't have had to marry Cal, she should have been with Jack without question, just the way I should be able to be with Harry, without question. There wouldn't be any guilt, any lies or any sneaking around.

I buried my face into George's shoulder and tried to keep my tears back. It was to no avail though and I began to sob softly.

Please just make it all go away…