Craving Nothing Unique
It seemed that all she ever did was cry. These days especially. Why couldn't he just…not!
That time was the last straw though, she had to leave. She just couldn't take it anymore!
He couldn't act like that, time and time again. Avoiding things he didn't think he (or she) were strong enough to deal with. Alone, obviously, they weren't. He got so temperamental, and she just cried…but together…they wouldn't.
Together, they would be strong enough. But how could she tell him that? They never spoke of it…
She hated to agree with her body (who was disobeying her by crying and caring and loving him) but she was hungry. Rising to her feet and winding her fallen sleeve back around her shoulder and down her slender spine, Inara padded gently to the kitchen where she found nothing but protein. That was the one thing she missed, fresh fruit…
The life she lived, just to be close to him. She smiled wryly to herself, despite her swollen eyes. It was strange that the eating area was quiet, but she welcomed it. The fact that it was late wasn't usually an issue. Out in space you didn't exactly follow the rules of the planets of the rise and fall of the sun…
Sometimes it was nice to go to the cockpit and just watch the stars. Inara rose gracefully to her feet and tucked her rubbish away in the disposal, before walking swiftly up the stairs and across to the stairs which lead upwards.
She halted before she got to the entry though, pausing for a moment before she turned away, an ache inside her.
They weren't doing anything, Zoe was asleep against Wash, curled up in his lap and resting on his chest, his work calloused hands petting her hair gently while the other fluttered around the controls half heartedly.
That was what Inara craved for sometimes. In her world there was just sex, and the acceptance of all things sexual, to do with the body. There was no love. Not the old, worn touching type, that Inara had only ever witnessed. The sweet starting kind Kaylee and Simon seemed to be forever trapped in, or the deep and old, always to be there kind that Zoe and Wash swam in.
Turning away from the entry to the stars and the simple display of pure love, Inara halted with a sigh, inches away from Mal.
"They at it again, huh?" he drawled, looking amused. "Should just turn it into heir bunk, and rent their old bunk out as well. Not fair they get more than one place, even I don't get that!" Mal joked, holding onto something overhead as he leaned his weight onto his arms, grinning good naturedly at Inara, unaware as usual that she wasn't content.
"You don't get anything." She snapped idly back, it was always like this. She always had to tease him about sex, and it was pitiful. Was that the only thing she had over him?
"Hey now…" Mal started to protest, but Inara had already pushed past him.
It wasn't much to ask…was it?
Well, it was much, as it would mean the world to her, more than that. But…it should be so simple. All it took were words, and usually the two exchanged more than they should.
All she wanted was for him to admit. So she could. Before it ate her away completely.
All she craved was something most single girls did…nothing unique.
But she knew she would never get that…
PartTwo for a gift I made for Sycotic in the February to April Gift Exchange on FictionNET (http/ sycotic .org /fnet) Sorry loff for my hopeless attempt :p
You should join FictionNET, it's an excellent forum to join and write for. Tell them Keladryie sent you ;)