Thus begins Arc 4: The Butterfly's Colors
Subaru's eyes darted around the village as time screamed back to normal. Voices of the milling soldiers suddenly slammed into his ears. "Mmh," He grunted as surprise filled him, and the breeze touched him.
It may have only been the breeze but when it hit him it felt like his skin was being torn off. Of course, a sensation like that didn't bring him any actual pain. All it did was shock him a little.
The light of the sun was blinding where it had once been soft, so he was forced to shut his eyes.
Every sensation had exploded into him at once as time resumed. It was nothing like the time stops that Satella created, which were gentle in comparison. Instead of the twisted love of her shadows surrounding him, it was like he'd been swimming in a pool, and then he'd been cruelly ripped from it.
Then, when time resumed, it was like he'd been shoved back into the pool from fifty meters in the sky. His entire body burned, and every sensory organ had been overloaded. He barely noticed as he vomited the contents of his stomach onto the dirt.
"Oh…" He quietly groaned. Or at least it sounded quiet to him. He would have no way to tell if it had been quiet or it was just his senses not gauging the real volume.
He clasped his arms around his body. What the hell…? Fuck…
"Barusu?" A voice called out to him. In his current state, he had no idea who it was. Every sound that entered his ears was melting together. They were all the same sounds repeated over and over again.
"Natsuki-san?" Maybe if he focused he would have been able to tell who'd just spoken. He was starting to be able to differentiate sounds, but they were still so... jumbled.
"Subaaaru?" That voice. It sounded like silver bells, but then why was it so similar to everything else?
"Subaru-kun?" Rem. With an effort, he was able to determine the final voice that called out to him.
"Huh?" Subaru pushed open his eyes. However, his vision was covered in blurry darkness, as if he'd just been rubbing his closed eyes too hard.
"Barusu, are you alright?" He could tell that it was Ram's voice now, but her pink hair, and the black of her maid uniform were all he could fully see.
"Yeah, I should-" The sensation of air pushing its way into his mouth caused him to gag.
Ram grabbed onto his shoulders with shaky hands, not because she was worried or uncertain though.
In response to the touch of the woman he was resolved to love, Subaru raised his finger gesturing to say that all he needed was time.
Ram was able to clearly understand his motion, but she still kept ahold of him, almost as if she was leaning on him. Subaru didn't notice it, but he himself had started to lean into the pink-haired maid's body.
Emilia, Rem, and Otto stepped up to where Subaru and Ram were standing. Their expressions were all puzzled by Subaru's sudden appearance meters away from when he'd just been right in front of them. Although they were currently too concerned with his well-being to comment on it.
While those three continued to make sure he was alright Frederica held back. Her gaze was hesitant as she looked at Subaru. She didn't move from her spot.
"Are you okay, Subaaaru?" Emilia voiced the trio's concern.
It took Subaru a few moments to respond, but when he did his voice was shaky. "I think so…" He trailed off in anticipation of another sensation slamming into him, thankfully the effects of Pandora's time stop seemed to be fading.
"Yeah, I'd say I'm alright now," His lips pursed in determination as he tried to stop leaning on Ram. He wasn't prepared for the new mind-shattering pain that jammed through his entire body. Every single muscle screamed out in agony. Outside of his mind Subaru's face barely moved. Not because he was hiding his pain, but just because he'd experienced torture worse than this many times over.
Eventually, he was able to push past the pain and stopped leaning on Ram, only for the pink-haired oni to grab onto his suit jacket before she could fall to the ground.
"Mmh!" A grunt of pain escaped Ram's mouth, and she looked up at Subaru. "I swear Barusu, if you're clumsy enough to drop me-" She wasn't able to finish her threat as blood filled her throat. She had to hack up some of it as it overflowed and spluttered out and down her chin.
"Ram?" Subaru shouted out in distress as a river of blood flowed down her face.
"Sister!" Rem shoved her body over to where Ram was leaning on Subaru.
Subaru ignored her, and raised up his screaming arm. Then, he brushed the hair on Ram's forehead out of the way. Only to reveal that none of the skin where her scar should have been was visible anymore. Instead, it was covered in red blood, and the hair that had been covering her horn was slick with the liquid.
"Emilia get Felix!" Subaru shouted out before blood filled his own throat. He didn't even take notice of Emilia running off, or Rem trying to make sure her sister was alright. Instead, he looked down at Ram, and used his hand to check how fresh the blood was.
When his middle finger pressed up against Ram's horn he figured out what had caused all of this. After all, the only thing he needed to do was look at his finger. The middle finger which he'd used to transfer mana into Ram for their battle with Ley was swollen and bloody. Cuts ran all along it.
He could tell that they were recently opened. On the tip of his finger pain burned his mind as he felt blood drain from what seemed like a hole bored straight through the tip of his finger to his nail. He wasn't entirely correct with this assessment however. As the hole in his middle finger only went a centimeter deep, not quite to his nail, but close.
Subaru wasn't able to continue his investigation, because of his legs collapsing out from beneath him. Luckily Rem and Otto were there to catch him, although he didn't notice his fall or their catching of him. His mind was too disoriented for him to think of anything, aside from one thing.
Ram, she looked like she was dying. I was the one who transferred the mana to her. Ram was hurt because of that. She suffered.
I caused Ram to suffer. Was the final thing he remembered before his eyelids covered his vision.
"How very interesting," An image filled his sleeping mind.
A woman's body sat alone at a table. Her hair fluttered in the wind, and she sipped at a cup of tea.
"My love for the old you may have faded, but you are so much different. You seem like someone that could fulfill my curiosity. Ahh, but why must the human mind be so, inefficient." The woman shook her head.
Subaru tried to speak, but…wait, where is Natsuki Subaru? He didn't even know if he really existed here, wait who existed?
"It's a little bit infuriating that I can only speak to you in your dreams, and in dreams that your brain won't remember no less." The woman smiled at…whatever they were right now. All they could determine was that the woman was not infuriated in the slightest. It was like she had no emotion at all.
"Well in hopes that a few things will stay, there is something that I want you to remember, although it's almost certain that you will forget."
The woman stood up from her seat and walked toward… someone.
"I would like to speak with you, there are some things I would like to discuss. When you arrive in Sanctuary-" The woman cut off as something within her forced her to stop speaking. A frown pushed onto the woman's face. The black highlights within her hair seemed to emit a dull purple glow. As did the violet butterfly atop her head.
"It seems our time is up, that damned spirit." The woman faded, as did their- no who, what were they? Whatever they were their memories of the event started to melt away as they left it.
Subaru's tan eyelids pulled back to reveal frantic brown irises. The dream he'd just had was almost completely gone.
All that remained was the word discuss. Not even the voice that spoke it remained, only that single word. If it was even defined enough to call a complete word. More an impression, but it could be called a word, couldn't it? He was unable to determine it, and as the dream grew further away he paid less and less attention to it.
However this wasn't why Subaru's eyes were frantic, it was the events that had occurred just before he'd passed out which had sent him away from rationality.
He quickly turned over, and realized that he was laying down. There was a temporary cloth bed under him. It was the same one that wounded soldiers had been laying on after the fight with the white whale.
It wasn't too long before he realized that Otto was sitting next to him. "Otto…" Subaru's voice was hoarse as he spoke. "Where are we?"
"We're still in Arlam, Natsuki-san, Felix didn't want to move you and Ram just yet," Otto explained.
"What about everyone else?" Subaru's voice had regained some of its earlier strength, but his body was extremely sore, and his nerves still groaned in pain. It wasn't the screaming of earlier but they weren't quiet.
"They didn't know if there was a dangerous presence on the road. So they wanted to wait until you could provide your insight. " At Otto's words, Subaru thought about the possibility of there being any other presences on the road back to the capital.
Gluttony is dead. But there's still Regulus, though he can be avoided if we scout the area enough. His Authority is still dependent upon his wives being near, so there would have to be some place for them, and he won't be too hard to spot just standing there waiting for us.
"Yeah I need to ask Crusch to do a few things in that regard, can you go get her for me?" Subaru said to the merchant.
"Of course, Natsuki-san." Otto stood up and walked off to get the royal candidate.
Once Otto had left, Subaru turned to his other side. Only to find that Ram was a meter away from him on a bed of cloth just like the one he was currently laying down on. In between him and Ram, was a sat down Emilia, though most of her attention was focused on Ram.
When Subaru looked at the maid he could easily tell why. Ram's forehead was covered in dried blood and her breathing was ragged. Her eyes were closed, and what peace she might have been able to attain in sleep, had been destroyed by the pain that wracked her body.
Guilt shoved into Subaru's mind. Ram… I'm sorry. If he could Subaru would have taken all of Ram's pain onto himself, but he didn't have that power. Instead, he could only pitifully reach his hand out to her. However, before his hand got too far he stopped himself. He wouldn't have been able to reach across the distance, but that wasn't why he stopped trying.
Without a word, he set his hand back down on his chest. "How do you feel, Subaru?" Emilia called down to him a few moments after Otto left.
"Does it matter?" He asked her, ignoring the pained look upon her face, he gazed back at Ram. Now he was able to notice Rem sitting on the opposite side of Ram in relation to Emilia. The blue-haired maid kept watchful eyes on her sister.
Subaru maybe wasn't able to notice it or just didn't want to see the self-loathing in Rem's eyes, as she looked down at her sister.
Before he could fully understand it he noticed Felix sitting cross-legged at the head of the two beds. He was about half a meter away from Ram and Subaru's cloth beds, and he was also in between the two. His healer's eyes scanned Ram and Subaru to see if their conditions worsened.
Felix's eyes studied him and Emilia, and once he was sure they would speak no further he piped up, "Did you knyow this would happen, Subaru?" He noticed the demi-human's words held a hint of distaste.
"If I did know… then I would have found another way to kill Ley." Subaru curtly responded to the cat-eared knight. Felix seemed satisfied with that answer and remained quiet until Otto returned with Crusch.
"Natsuki, what is it that you needed to speak to me about?" Crusch stepped up to him with her usual imperious bearing. Subaru attempted to sit up to speak with her, but Felix reached over to try and stop him.
"Don't try to sit up nyow you're hurt and nyeed to take it easy," Felix instructed.
Subaru didn't listen to the knight and tried to sit up anyway, only for Emilia to reach over and grab his shoulders. She easily pinned him to the ground with nothing more than her arm. "You heard what Felix said. You have to rest, Subaru."
"Yes, I would trust Felix on this matter," Crusch offered and kneeled down in an attempt to put them on more equal footing.
"Hm. You're all probably right," Subaru stopped trying to fight against Emilia's arms and readied his words for Crusch. Within a few moments, he had his plan figured out. "Alright, so the plan is pretty simple, and all we need to do is take it slow on our way back to the capital, and scout the road ahead of us as we travel."
"Hmm, it seems like it's a good plan, though I'd like to ask who or what you are being cautious about." Crusch made her only question about his plan known.
"It's very possible that Regulus Corneas, the Sin Archbishop of Greed, is in the area waiting for us," Subaru answered her question.
Subaru's words elicited a variety of reactions from the people listening. Emilia's breath caught at the mention of another Sin Archbishop, the same happened with Otto and Felix, Rem on the other hand, only grunted in anger.
"Well, what would we do if we run into him?" Crusch had been largely unaffected by his words, at least from what Subaru could see of her face, he had no inkling into her thoughts.
Subaru who had already thought about this easily responded, "We would only have to find a different route to take, I assume it wouldn't be all that difficult to take the dragon carriages off the roadway for a little bit, then we can get back onto the road once we're far enough past him."
"Why don't we attack him?" Rem's words of fury slipped out. He could hear a hint of tears at the back of her voice.
"While I think it would be far less simple than Rem-san suggests, it is something we should at least consider. Ridding the world of another Archbishop would be highly worthwhile to both the world and our camps," She gestured to Emilia before continuing on, "So with that said, how difficult would it be to take him down with what strength we have here?"
Subaru took a moment to think. "It depends on the exact circumstances, but it could either be simple, if we can find his wives, or if we can't then it would be like trying to kill Reinhard." Crusch paled slightly at his words, then quickly reasserted her self-control and came to a decision.
"Then I will go with your plan of avoiding him, a gamble like that is not one to take right now." Crusch turned to go ready the gathered soldiers, members of the fang of iron, and the three Gluttony victims, for their departure.
However, before she got too far she spoke to him one final time. "Natsuki, I would like to request for you to answer a question of mine," Subaru in response nodded his head.
"Ask away," Crusch thought for a second upon the best way to phrase her question.
"Are you affiliated with the Witch's Cult, or were you in the past?" The content of her question made it sound like she was suspicious of him, but the way she asked gave the opposite implication.
Emilia moved to begin speaking in defense of Subaru but before she could he grabbed onto her wrist, then answered Crusch's question.
"No, I'm not and never have been." Crusch looked closely at him for a few seconds, before nodding her head.
"I had expected that to be the case, but I just wanted to be sure I could continue to trust your information," Without another word the royal candidate moved on to getting the caravan ready.
"Nyow I'm going to do a bit more healing work on you and miss Ram before we go," Felix spoke. Subaru waved him away and let his eyes drift closed. The boy had decided it would be best to listen to Emilia and Crusch, so he began to force himself back to sleep.
It didn't take him more than a minute to be successful in his quest for sleep. However, right before his mind vanished he thought one last thing to himself.
I'm sorry, Ram…
Blood. There was so much of it. Why was there so much blood? It was everywhere covering his chest, his arms, and his legs. He could barely open his eyes because of it, and whenever he tried to wipe it away a new river of blood streamed down over them.
There was so much blood, too much blood.
Inherently Subaru knew that none of it was his own. If it isn't mine then whose blood is it?
"Barusu…" A haggard voice whispered.
He turned around to see Ram's body, or what was left of it. Her arms and legs had been ripped off. And her torso was full of bite marks. A small snowy white rabbit hopped around her body.
Subaru tried to shy away from her, but his body moved of its own accord. He reached down and stretched his left hand out to her forehead. When he touched it the scar on Ram's forehead began to glow with mana.
Her red eyes flicked up to him.
"Ah!" Subaru jumped away from those eyes and forced himself from the dream.
A few minutes before, Emilia was helping Rem lift her sister into the carriage. Together they were easily strong enough to get Subaru and Ram into the carriage with relative ease.
Though they had to take a bit more time than they normally would have as Felix had told them they'd needed to be careful when moving them.
"So how long until they're healthy again?" Puck said, as he emerged from his crystal and floated over to Felix.
The demi-human knight took a second to think upon the information he'd gathered throughout his healing of Subaru and Ram.
"For Subaru, it will tyake a day or two for him to completely heal," He paused for a few seconds thinking of the best way to phrase his words, "But for Ram… it could take anywhere from three days tyo a week."
Rem's expression fell as she and Emilia set Ram down in the carriage next to Subaru. Rem's heart was too clouded for her to ask Felix any questions, so Emilia asked about Ram's condition in her place.
"How long do you think she'll be asleep?" Her voice of silver bells rang out.
"Most likely a cyouple hours to a day," He answered.
"What caused their conditions?" Otto butted into the conversation.
In response, Felix tilted his head and closed his eyes. "Hmm…" He cupped his chin in his hand. "Nyow this is less concrete but from what I've gyathered their cases aren't quite the same. For Subaru, he hyad far too much myana flowing through his body at once. I asked Crusch-sama about what hyappened and her words add to this." He walked up to the carriage and grabbed hold of the sleeping Subaru's left hand.
Felix traced his finger until he reached the place on Subaru's hand where he'd healed a bloody hole. "He used a myana injection technique to give Ram-san mana to fight Gluttony. So he likely hyad far more mana than he was cyapable of handling flowing throughout his body, althyough it seems he was adept enough at the technique to not redirect the myana through his gyate, if thyat had been the case he would have shattered his gate within a few seconds. Though this did have the side effect of nyearly destroying his finger and hyand."
Felix turned to make sure another question wasn't coming, then when he noticed that they didn't have any he moved on to Ram. "Ram-san's condition is slyightly different. Here the damage comes from the method with which the myana was actually given to her rather than the actual myana itself." Felix demonstrated a vast knowledge of gates and the circulation of mana throughout bodies as he went on to explain Ram's injuries.
"Most of the injuries are cyentered on this," Felix's hand passed over the spot where Ram's horn had once been, "So it can be determined that Ram-san's injuries are due to Subaru's mana transfer being less than suited for large quantities of mana. It's nyot thyat Ram-san's body was unable to handle the total level of mana, more so from the injyection method, speed, and quantity of injection using said method. Byasically Subaru forced too much mana through this spot in an unnatural manner and it caused massive damage throughout Ram-san's body."
Once he was done with the explanation he looked back at them once more to see if they had any more questions. "Anything else? Alright, I'll be with Crusch-syama and will retyurn in a few hours to recheck their injuries." Felix quickly strode off toward the front of the convoy that had begun to form.
Emilia, Otto, and Puck watched the cat-eared man walk off. Rem was too focused on her sister to care about Felix.
"Sister, I'm sorry. Why couldn't you be born with two horns?" She whispered with a teary voice. Concern spread across Emilia's face, and she climbed up into the carriage.
"Hey, Rem," Emilia sat down next to the blue-haired maid. "Felix said that Ram would be alright, she just has to rest for a bit."
Rem didn't respond and continued to cry. Emilia wrapped her arm around Rem and pulled the girl's head into her chest. "It'll be alright." Emilia soothed the oni.
"But sister is hurt. And it's because of me." Rem's voice was hoarse with pain.
"How is it because of you?" Emilia responded.
"Don't worry about it, Emilia-sama." Rem quickly dismissed the girl's worry. "Rem shouldn't make you worry." Emilia ran her hand through Rem's hair.
"I don't understand Rem, but it's okaaay for people to worry about you."
"No you should be worried about sister, not me. Rem shouldn't take things from sister. Rem shouldn't be..." She denied Emilia's attempts. The naive girl didn't fully understand what Rem's words meant, and her only thought was to continue trying to soothe Rem.
For a few moments, Emilia tried to think of words, until a blonde-haired woman walked over to the cart. "Emilia-sama." Frederica attempted to get the silver-haired girl's attention.
"What is it, Frederica?" Emilia said to the tall woman.
"Roswaal-sama requested that I return to being a maid, so I will keep the mansion guarded while you are all in the capital." She said.
"Thank you," Emilia whispered.
Otto stood for a few seconds before moving to sit in the driver's seat of the carriage. Emilia wasn't all that focused on the man she was too busy worrying about Subaru, Rem, and Ram.
Once Crusch decided it was time for the carriage to move the group set off for the capital.
Subaru's eyes snapped open, and he quickly noticed that he was in a rocking carriage. His vision moved across the cramped quarters. He let his head fall to the left and he was greeted by pink hair. Ram's head was only a couple of centimeters away from his own.
His eyes narrowed in guilt as he looked at the spot on her forehead where her scar was. Ram… Eventually, he shook his head and looked up to find Rem and Emilia sitting next to each other on one of the carriages benches.
Subaru opened his mouth to speak, "Emilia, Rem..." His voice was scratchy with dehydration. Rem looked down at him with teary eyes. Rem… you shouldn't have to look so sad.
"Do you need some water, Subaaaru?" Emilia asked him, her voice attentive. In response, the black-haired boy nodded.
As Emilia looked around in the cramped space for the water Subaru reached into the back of his mind. "Spirits," He grabbed onto the minor spirits in the atmosphere. Marble-sized orbs of blue light soon filled Otto's merchant carriage.
"Search the area for this man," Subaru showed all of the spirits one of his memories of Regulus.
The spirits, who wanted to do his bidding, and get away from Puck, obeyed and rushed off to scan the area for the Sin Archbishop.
"What was that for?" Emilia asked as she held a water sack up to his mouth.
After taking a deep gulp of the water Subaru proceeded to explain it, "I sent them off to search for the Sin Archbishop I was talking to Crusch about earlier." Emilia pushed a determined expression onto her face at his words. Subaru could tell that it didn't run as deep as his own resolve, but he was still impressed by it.
Though it was easy for Emilia to impress him, as the Emilia of his timeline could not be considered at all impressive or competent. New guilt pushed into his chest as he thought of the Emilia he'd left behind.
How do I stop that from happening? He asked himself. He needed to start thinking about all of the mistakes he'd made last time in the Sanctuary.
But for the life of him all he could think of to fix it was to not contract with Echidna. He didn't understand what all of his other mistakes were, but he was sure there were many.
I'll find the right path to walk, because I have a reason to move forward. Subaru thought of the dream he'd had earlier that same day. His dream of a future with Ram.
Unfortunately, that dream seemed further away than it had once had. It felt more abstract. Subaru turned over to where Ram was. He reached out to her. But he stopped his hand before he could touch her.
I caused her to suffer…
But… I still want to love Ram. I want to love all of them. All of the people he considered a friend or wanted to consider a friend appeared in his mind.
If I caused her to suffer, then I won't do it again. From now on I'll never cause you to suffer, Ram.
I still love all of them, Subaru's eyes glanced around at the people in the carriage.
I will continue on, and fix all of my mistakes, for them.
"You don't have to defeat him alone." Subaru noticed a determined expression on Ram's own face.
Is it possible? Can I... rely on them? I caused Ram to suffer, but she wanted me to hold onto her. Is it possible, that I can work with them, that I don't have to do it all alone?
But do…? It doesn't matter. I'll find the right answer, I'll keep moving forward.
Without any more hesitation, he reached out and took Ram's hand.
The rest of the carriage ride passed in relative peace, aside from the part where Crusch stopped everything to check back with him.
"None of our scouts have found the Sin Archbishop," Crusch spoke as she stepped into the carriage where he was still resting on the wooden floor.
"None of my spirits have either," He began to think upon what their course of action should be, "We should just keep going as normal until, or at this point if, we spot him."
"Sounds like the best course of action," Crusch responded before she returned to her carriage and restarted the journey back to the capital.
For the entire rest of the trip, Regulus Corneas was nowhere to be found.
When the caravan arrived at Crusch's mansion the sun had long since set. Felix returned to the back of the group to check on Ram and Subaru, and move them into the same room so he could treat one of them and keep an eye on the other.
Thanks to a good word from Subaru, Crusch allowed Otto to stay in the mansion as a guest until the Emilia camp departed.
Also thanks to Subaru's words Julius and Ricardo were able to stay as guests until Crusch could explain to Anastasia and their families who they were. Her word carried quite a lot of value in that endeavor as she would be able to verify the two weren't lying about their origins.
Wilhelm got his own room to sleep in until Subaru could find a way to restore his name and memories. After everything Subaru had told her Crusch felt it was the least she could do for the forgotten sword demon.
After all that, Rem and Emilia both insisted upon staying with Subaru and Ram. The two women were so determined they brought in chairs, so they could be close even if they fell asleep.
After everything that had happened Crusch hadn't wanted to deny them their request, and Felix had taken her decision to heart.
So when Emilia and Rem watched over Felix's shoulder as he performed his tasks he couldn't say much to the two of them.
"Hyey Subaru, I'm going to put you to sleep again so that I can get the last of the healing done," Felix explained to the still awake boy.
"Thanks, Felix," Subaru knew that he would have to be in good shape if he was going to deal with Roswaal in the Sanctuary.
"You're doing great Subaaaru," Emilia attempted to cheer him on. The corners of Subaru's mouth lifted a tiny bit in response.
Emilia smiled at his warm expression as she watched Felix use his healing magic to put him to sleep.
Once the demi-human was done with the last of his healing work on Subaru he moved over to the bed on the other side of the room, where Ram was sleeping.
"Alright, this will be a bit extyensive, syo it would be much appreciated if you cyould both remain quiet." Felix requested of the two women.
"Of course," Emilia nodded.
"Anything for sister's recovery," Rem answered. Tears filled her eyes as she looked down at her sister. She was barely able to hold it in, but Emilia could see the guilt hidden there.
Guilt entered Emilia's own eyes. She had no idea how to help Rem. None of her soothing had worked, and she had no idea what else to do.
Felix didn't notice this, and turned back to the pink-haired oni and began the last of her treatments. For almost three hours the water mage worked in utter silence to fix all of the physical trauma affecting Ram.
When he was finally done he stepped back and wiped sweat from his brow. "They shouldn't nyeed any more treatment from me. Subaru should be abyle to walk in the myorning and Ram-san should follow shortly after. She'll also most likely wake up tomyorrow." Felix bowed his head to Emilia then left the room.
"Good thing they'll be okaaay," Emilia commented after Felix had left.
"Definitely, Emilia-sama," Rem tried to hide the sorrow and guilt that was still filling her heart, but Emilia was able to quickly notice it.
"Hey is there anything you want to talk about?" Rem shook her head in response to Emilia's words.
"No you should save your words for sister. She deserves them more than Rem." Rem's teary voice dismissed her.
The two sat in silence for a few moments until they eventually slipped into sleep.
Sand, why was there so much sand? It was a question Subaru didn't know the answer to. But it was everywhere, stretching as far as the eye could see. I'm dreaming, aren't I? He quickly realized.
This dream was something of an outlier, as he could figure out that it wasn't real quickly, but when he tried to influence it nothing happened. He was trapped in this dream, he couldn't leave. All he could do was make the best decision in whatever situation he was in.
To find what that decision was Subaru's eyes quested around the desert he found himself in. Searching for any kind of landmark that existed, but as far as he could see there was nothing.
If there's nothing to guide me I should just pick a direction and keep going that way. Maybe everyone is waiting outside… but it's a dream so I can't be sure. But I should treat it as real for now. Once he was done thinking Subaru picked a random direction, and began to walk.
For hours he walked, until his lips were so cracked that blood poured into his mouth whenever he moved his lips too much.
His legs were numb, so tired. His muscles were failing, but he continued to walk. He didn't grow hungry, or thirsty. Only felt his body grow weaker and weaker as he walked for what seemed like an endless amount of time.
"Mmh," He grunted as his legs collapsed beneath him. Need to keep going. Need to get out of this desert. Subaru was so caught up in his dream at this point he'd forgotten it was a dream.
Need to get up. He forced his body up, and conjured an image of Ram in his head. Need to keep walking.
As he forced his screaming legs forward he continued to fill his mind with images of people he loved. Rem and Emilia soon joined Ram. Beatrice followed not long after, along with Otto and Petra after her.
More grew in his mind as he forced his dried-up body through the sand.
Subaru continued through the ever-present sun, even as the hours stretched on it never moved in the sky. All that kept him going by this point was pure resolve.
However, it was clear that soon willpower would be nowhere near enough. This was made clear when he fell onto his stomach. He struggled for a second, trying to force air into his lungs after the wind had been knocked from him.
I need to get to them. He tried to force himself to his feet, but they were too exhausted by this point for even him to keep going, so instead, he used his arms. With a grunt, he grabbed his hand into the sand and dragged himself forward.
His face twisted slightly from the new exertion of pulling his body across the sand.
He lasted for a few hours like that before his arms gave out too. I failed. I couldn't get to them. I couldn't make it out.
Subaru stayed there in the sand, the life steadily draining from him as the sun finally set. He looked out upon the dark landscape while his consciousness drained from him.
After a few hours in the night, Subaru caught a glimpse of light. Walking toward him was a large group of people. They all looked to be well equipped for the desert, each one had a canteen which they drank from, and they seemed well-rested.
It wasn't long before they got close enough to Subaru for him to be able to recognize them. Ram, Rem, Emilia, Otto, Beatrice, Petra, and Reinhard all made up the group. They laughed softly to each other even as they walked through the seemingly endless desert.
As they grew closer to Subaru the black-haired boy realized they hadn't noticed him. His face didn't change. Before he could reach out to them a voice called out to him from the sky.
"Hey Subaru," Puck's feline tone reverberated through Subaru's dream, "I need you to wake up for a few minutes."
After those words, Subaru felt himself be shaken from his dream.
"Finally awake, eh Subaru?" Subaru's eyes darted around to try and find Puck. It didn't take him all that long as the spirit was right above him.
"Puck…" Subaru's heart dropped when he realized that it was far past the time when Puck should have been stuck in his crystal. Not again. Not again.
"Can you come out into the hallway with me? We wouldn't want to disturb them all from their sleep." Puck gestured to Emilia, Rem, and Ram. Emilia was sitting in a chair right next to his bed. Rem was doing the same next to the bed that Ram was sleeping in.
Puck floated toward the door while gesturing for Subaru to follow him. The black-haired boy had to force himself out of the bed and onto his legs, which was extremely difficult for him. His legs nearly gave out, the feeling was very similar to the one in the dream he'd just had.
However, he was able to catch himself, after that it got slightly easier to walk as he followed Puck. The shaky feeling in his legs mostly faded as his body got used to walking again.
Once the feline spirit and Subaru were outside of the room and standing in the hallway Puck spoke.
"There's something I wanted to ask you Subaru."
Subaru's face paled. He'd known that this would happen, why wouldn't it? But even still he dreaded the words that Puck was about to say to him.
"Go ahead," He responded to the cat anyway, even if he knew he would hate the words that Puck was about to say.
The gray cat noticed all of these emotions roiling within Subaru, but he still decided to make his request anyway. With what was happening to him he knew that he would have to make this request to Subaru today. There was no other time for it to happen.
"Can you watch over Lia for me?" Puck made his request.
"You're leaving, why?" Subaru cut right to the heart of the interaction with not a care as to how Puck would react.
"You know a lot more than you let on Subaru," Puck looked at him with interest where he once might have gazed on with suspicion.
"But if I had a choice I wouldn't be leaving," Puck spoke with a melancholic voice.
"What's forcing you?" Subaru demanded.
In response to Subaru's words Puck only looked to the floor with an anguished gaze. His body faded and grew faint in the hallway light.
"Lia…" Was all Puck responded to Subaru with before he disappeared.
"What do you mean?" Subaru reached out and tried to grab the spirit, but Puck was gone before he could grab him.
"Puck? Puck? Puck?" Subaru grasped at the small blue orbs of mana that had been left in Puck's wake.
For a few moments, Subaru stood there, shocked at how suddenly Puck had left. Eventually though, he forced his resolve to return.
I knew Puck would leave, now I just have to figure out what happened to him. Subaru balled his hands into fists, and let determination glow in his eyes.
With his familiar strength still in his step, Subaru returned back to the room he'd just left. Doing his best not to wake the three girls he made his way back to his bed.
That night Subaru found himself unable to sleep. Maybe because he just didn't want to, or he couldn't. His mind was too busy racing to analyze everything that Puck had said to think of sleep.
Ram's eyelids pulled back to reveal red irises. Which quickly proceeded to scan across the room. She soon noticed Rem sleeping in a sitting position above her bed, Emilia was sleeping in another chair across the room, and Subaru was lying in his own bed.
She also realized he was awake. His eyelids were open and his brown eyes were twitching, as if he was lost in thought.
Under his breath, he was whispering to himself. Ram had to focus her hearing to try and make out what it was. "What's forcing you…? Puck? Puck? Puck? Puck, what's forcing you? I don't understand. Why did you answer with Lia?" Subaru moved his hand up and took hold of his head.
As he was thinking Ram took a moment to herself to figure a few things out as well.
Alright, first where are we?
In response to her own question she looked at the familiar pattern on the walls, and then took the most logical course of events to guess where she was.
This is probably Crusch's mansion. Now, what happened to me? Ram thought to herself as she tried to move her arm and was met with incredible soreness.
She focused on the pulsing headache that she was having as well. And the pain, which normally racked her body thanks to the loss of her horn, had grown worse.
This is probably from Barusu's mana transfer during the fight with Gluttony. An image of Ley's face and a memory of his final words appeared in her mind. She tried to summon up hatred for the Archbishop, but instead, she was only able to pity him.
After a few seconds of trying to feel anything other than pity for Ley, she gave up and turned her head back to Subaru. When she saw the scrunched-up expression on his face Ram finally was rewarded with some hate for the Sin Archbishop of Gluttony.
He had tried to kill Barusu. To erase him from everyone's memory, or to remove his own memories.
Instead of continuing to focus on Gluttony, she tried to figure out a way to get Subaru out of whatever was going on in his mind.
You're a pain in the ass Barusu. Always got something going on in that idiot head. Ram condemned him internally, but she knew she'd help him without a hint of hesitation.
All she had to do was figure out a way to help. Her thinking only lasted until her stomach rumbled. Huh… A rudimentary plan quickly slapped into her mind.
Her first step in executing her plan however, would be challenging. She had to take a step, literally. Gritting her teeth Ram scrunched her core and got her body into a sitting position. From here she had to shove down a pained grunt as she used her arms to turn her body so that her legs were hanging off of the bed.
And it was here that Ram found a minor flaw in her plan. Her legs didn't reach the floor. Even in a sitting position, there was still space in between her feet and the bed, normally that wouldn't have been all that much of a problem, but even a short fall would be incredibly painful at the moment.
Ram had been too busy trying to get out of bed to realize that Subaru had been watching her with a confused expression the entire time.
Noticing her predicament Subaru stood up from his own bed and used quiet steps to cross the room. Ram, still too engrossed in the problem to notice Subaru, was filled with shock when he kneeled down in front of her.
"Ram, what are you doing?" He whispered, trying not to wake Rem and Emilia, which wasn't all that difficult, as both of them were in a coma-like state after all they had gone through the day before.
Ram had to push a scowl onto her face when she realized that Subaru was well enough to walk. "What does it look like? I was trying to get something to eat, self-centered Barusu, not considering that other people need food too. You make me sick." For all of Ram's effort, she still couldn't make her remark sound real in the slightest.
"Well, then I'll go be self-centered and let you get off the bed on your own." Subaru made it look like he was going to get up and walk back to his bed.
"Unhelpful too, honestly." Ram shook her head in mock disgust.
"Fine," Subaru pretended he was reluctant to help. Instead of waiting for Ram to ask him how she wanted to help he wrapped his arms around her midsection, and helped her get down onto her feet with a gentle motion.
He shifted his hands so they were instead on her shoulders, so if she fell he could easily catch her. The pink-haired oni would never admit to anyone that having Subaru's hands on her made her feel safe.
With the safety of Subaru's guiding hands, Ram took shaky steps forward. She nearly fell a few times on the way to the door, but Subaru was able to grip her shoulders and stabilize her.
Right before she got to the door, she turned to look at his face. It was twisted in guilt, no doubt he was blaming himself for the state she was in. "Idiot Barusu, even I thought you would figure out that my state is Gluttony's fault, but I suppose that's putting too much faith in someone like you."
Subaru felt his guilt fade slightly at Ram's comforting words. It didn't disappear completely, but he knew she was right. Still, he had trouble not blaming himself. Although Ram was comforted by the glimmer of resolve in his eyes.
I need to yell at him for that after this, then hopefully I can squeeze a kiss out of him. Ram thought back to the sensation of his lips on her own. Just you wait Barusu. A smug smile glimmered on the maid's face.
Eventually, she and Subaru made it out into the hallway, from there it grew easier as Ram got used to walking. Her shakiness had largely disappeared by the time they got to the dining room, and Subaru had let his arms fall to the side. Although he was still keeping a close watch on Ram, to make sure that she didn't fall.
Before they got to the dining room they were interrupted. "I see y'ar doing better!" Ricardo suddenly wrapped his massive arm around Subaru's neck.
"Oh hey, Ricardo," Subaru greeted the demi-human.
"Ya guys hungry too?" The large man asked, he pushed a smile onto his face. Ram could easily see it was only a mask. Hidden behind his eyes was an immense sorrow. The pink-haired oni felt a twisting in her heart looking at it, but she knew that she wouldn't be able to help. She wasn't the connection that Ricardo had lost after his name was eaten.
"Ram was hungry..." Subaru answered. Ram could tell from the way he looked that he was hesitant as to how he was supposed to act around Ricardo. He was the only one who could still remember a thing about the man. And from what Ram was able to gather from their interaction, they didn't seem all that familiar with each other either.
"Yeah c'mon, Julius and I have our own section of the table." Ricardo led Subaru and Ram to the table where Julius and Ricardo had their own spot. A few servants were dining at other sections of the table. Crusch and Felix weren't there as they were busy in the capital figuring out what would happen with the white whale, and who would get credit for the subjugation.
Subaru trusted that the royal candidate would be as fair as possible, so he hadn't gone along with them. She'd spoken to him a few hours before while Ram was still asleep.
"So you and Julius are hanging out?" Subaru asked.
"Yeah I'm guessing we used to be friends, he's pretty easy ta talk to," Ricardo responded, after that he rattled off a joke about Julius' knightly code.
Subaru's face didn't move at the man's joke, but Ricardo wasn't disheartened by it. Anyone with a brain could tell that Subaru's emotions were a bit dead. And Ricardo was fairly certain he had a brain.
Ram watched silently as Ricardo continued to bounce jokes off of Subaru while they continued toward the dining room. The demi-human almost used Subaru as a way to test out his jokes.
In Ricardo's mind if they elicited no response from Subaru then they weren't not good. And if they didn't not elicit a response from Subaru they were good.
Ram easily noticed the man trying to use humor as a way of calming himself down from the loss of his name. She couldn't fault him for it, she didn't know what she'd do if Rem forgot her.
Eventually, the group arrived in the dining room. They sat down at the table with Julius and waited for some of Crusch's servants to bring them food.
"Wonderful to make your acquaintance, Ram-san, and hello Subaru." Julius addressed the maid with formality. Ram responded in the proper way a maid would respond, then silently watched the conversation that began between Subaru, Ricardo, and Julius.
She was interested to note that Subaru almost entirely left the conversation to Julius and Ricardo. He saw himself as being there to help the other two begin rebuilding their relationship. They asked him questions about some of the inconsistencies in their memories, although they were able to fill in quite a few details on their own.
After a few minutes of the conversation between Julius and Ricardo continuing, someone new entered the conversation.
"Natsuki-san!" A merchant clad entirely in green clothes called from the other side of the room. He walked over to the table, his face slightly frantic.
"What is it, Otto?" Subaru asked him.
Otto took a second to calm himself before responding, "Did you ever tell me when we were leaving to that Sanctuary place? Or did I completely miss that?" The merchant's face was twisted in uncertainty.
"Well I can tell you now, I figure we should leave and head back to Ros' mansion today," Subaru told Otto his idea.
"Today?" Otto asked with an incredulous look on his face. "I have to do so much work to get everything ready."
"Yep, thanks Otto," Subaru looked at him with a neutral expression, but a hint of humor glimmered in his eyes.
"Fine, Natsuki-san," The merchant shook his head and walked out to go get ready to leave. On the way out he threw up his arms into the air exaggeratedly.
Ram kept quiet as she watched Otto walk out of the room. Hmm. He seems trustworthy so far. He was a quick thinker against Ley. And Gluttony judged him as something worth eating, so that counts for something. But is that something for or against him? I would bet on for him. Gluttony viewed him as living up to his tastes, he didn't even rate Crusch that highly.
She shifted her eyes to Subaru, who was looking at Otto's back with warmth. Barusu likes him and seems to trust him.
For the rest of the meal, Ram continued to analyze Otto, after all from what Subaru and the man himself had said Otto would be joining them at Sanctuary.
Hm. You are an interesting man, Otto.
Rem woke up to an empty bed. Her eyes immediately shot wide. Sister! She jumped up and out of her chair, then proceeded to scan around the room. Emilia was still asleep and Subaru was also gone.
Rem's guilt spiked within her, but she couldn't let it paralyze her, not right now. She needed to know what happened to her sister. So she checked on her Synesthesia and found that Ram was still alive, and not in distress, so she went to the most likely location she could be.
After a few moments, she reached the dining room. She stopped herself at the door when she saw Subaru and her sister eating with a purple-haired man dressed in a knight uniform and a demi-human dressed as a member of the fang of iron.
She struggled to figure out who the men were, then she realized that they were the men whose names had been eaten by Gluttony.
Witch Cultist. Rem's hands reflexively balled into fists as she thought of Ley. He'd been disgusting. Multiple times during her and Subaru's fight with him he'd taunted her with threats of eating her sister. To her slight regret, she'd always attacked him when he'd done that. But there had been no casualties because of it, so Rem didn't feel too bad about it.
Her guilt was only directed at her sister until she remembered something. "Do you know who Ricardo Welkin is?" They were Subaru's words when they reached Crusch and Ram's group in the forest.
Rem moved away from the door and back into the hallway, as if fleeing. Those times I gave into Gluttony's taunts. How did I escape? She wasn't completely stupid, she knew now that she had never stood a hint of a chance against Gluttony. And she also knew that Subaru had stood little chance as well.
There were no casualties, unless… The two forgotten men appeared in her mind. Oh…
Her nails started digging into her arms, and she closed off her Synesthesia so that her sister wouldn't have to worry about her. Sister shouldn't have Synesthesia. She shouldn't have anyone to have Synesthesia with.
It didn't take her long to decide it was best to return to the room and try to not bother her sister, Subaru, or the two men.
Once she had arrived back at the room, the blue-haired oni sat down in the same chair she had slept in.
Blood leaked from her arms, and began to stain the underside of her nails. Her face twisted in a mix of pain, self-loathing, and guilt.
I'm the reason why some of them lost their names. My impulses caused them to lose everything. Sister can control her impulses. Sister doesn't cause people to lose their names.
I just cause everyone trouble. Sister should have two horns. Why was one robbed from her?
Rem continued to stare forward contemplating all the harm she'd caused to others with her birth. She didn't look up from her guilt until the door of the room opened.
Her blue eyes flicked up to the door where Subaru and Ram were standing. They were stopped so Ram could take a short breather before she walked back to the bed.
Rem covered up the gashes on her arms and pretended to be asleep so that her sister wouldn't have to worry about her. Rem didn't deserve to exist, so would she deserve her sister's worry?
With her ears, she could sense Subaru move over to make sure Ram was comfortable.
Rem cracked her eyes open a tiny bit to see that Ram looked a little dissatisfied with herself. What she didn't know was that it was because Ram hadn't managed to get a kiss out of Subaru.
Rem didn't guess such an inconsequential reason and assumed it was because her sister was dissatisfied with her. Even if her assumption was incorrect Rem still didn't try to speak with her sister to address the issue.
Bile rose in her throat at the very idea of her trying to speak with Ram. Rem will make everything worse. She continued to keep her Synesthesia suppressed so that Ram thought she was only asleep.
With her cracked open eyes Rem could see Subaru pull up a third chair, which Felix had been using last night during his healing, and sat down to stay by Ram's side while she fell asleep.
Rem held herself from moving for the next few minutes as her older twin slipped into sleep.
When Ram was eventually asleep Subaru stood up, Rem finally opened her eyes. She easily recognized the guilty twist to his body, and the remorseful sound in his step.
He walked toward the door of the exit. As he passed her chair he slowed down. "Come with me, Rem." He grabbed onto her shoulder and half dragged her to the door.
The blue-haired maid didn't resist, as for the next few minutes, they walked along in silence until Subaru stopped at one of the hallway doors. They were a floor lower than they had been, but the hallway still looked exactly the same. Rem tried to focus on the details of the interior design in some odd mix of guilt and avoidance.
Even with the want to avoid what was inside Rem allowed Subaru to lead her into the dim room. It seemed like a room tailored toward helping someone sleep peacefully.
As Subaru pulled up two chairs he spoke to her for the first time since she'd started following him.
"I wonder why Crusch went to such lengths…" He didn't say anything else, instead, he set the chairs down next to the one-person bed and sat down. Rem did the same, and finally, she gazed upon the one who was asleep.
Laying down on the bed before her was an old man. He gave off a grizzled yet grandfatherly air.
"Who was he?" Rem asked Subaru. Her guilt retreated for the barest of moments.
He remained silent for a moment, as if unsure of how to answer her question.
"Wilhelm van Astrea." Rem easily heard the tears lacing Subaru's voice. She realized that she'd been wrong. He hadn't hesitated in answering her question because of uncertainty, no it was the immense pain in his voice that had kept him from speaking.
"I could have saved him." Tears leaked down Subaru's face. The tears she'd been holding in since she'd woken up pushed at the edge of her eyelids, and a few slipped down her face.
"I could have too," He froze at her words. "He was part of my group in the forest, wasn't he?" Rem ignored her own memories which insisted she'd been alone. She could tell her memories made no sense in their current state. Her nails found her arms again, and returned to the gashes she'd carved earlier.
Rem turned to look at him, Subaru didn't meet her eyes. "I'm right…" She didn't continue.
He sat still for a few moments and let tears fall from his eyes. Instead of responding verbally, he could only nod.
"He was close to you," Rem's voice was barely able to push the words out. She'd made everything worse. She'd failed so horribly. Hurt people.
I really am just a bad replacement for sister.
Her held in tears stormed down her face. The two sobbed next to each other, in quiet solitude.
For the next few minutes, they cried out. Subaru for the loss of someone so close to him, and for his failure to use Return by Death. Rem for her failure as an individual. She'd known about how worthless and detrimental she was, but now it had been put on full display.
She'd caused this man to fall to Gluttony. And now Subaru was crying next to her because of it. She'd hurt the man her sister loved. She'd hurt someone who she understood. She'd hurt someone she'd wanted to be friends with.
They continued to cry, until Subaru let out a final sob, then, he stopped crying.
Rem looked over at him through still wet eyes. "Subaru-kun…?" He waited a few seconds to think. Then he looked into her eyes. She saw a mix of guilt and fondness, which were both overshadowed by resolve.
"It would be a disservice to Wilhelm if I continued to cry, he wanted me to move forward. I can't keep looking back, I have to move on, and look toward the future, to fix the mistakes I've made, and never make them again." Subaru's lips weren't smiling, but they weren't frowning.
He stood up and moved for the door, only to see Rem hadn't followed him.
She'd only kept on crying. Something new glimmered in Subaru's eyes.
"You need to do the same Rem. Because you made a mistake. You failed. You got people hurt with your poor choices," With every sentence Rem sank lower and lower. She knew that everything he said was correct.
"You need to stand up." Rem's eyes widened, then she shook her head. He moved back to her, and reached out his hand to help.
"No, Rem hurt people," She rejected his words, and her tears fell faster, "I won't go to the Sanctuary with you, I'll just make everything worse."
"I want you to continue Rem, come on, you can do better next time."
"Sister won't forget about what I've done, she'll never forgive me! I'm just a bad replacement for her. She knows it, but she's too nice! Sister is too kind! She knows she should cast me out!"
"Ram isn't, it's only one mistake, you can do better," Subaru's voice sharpened at her use of Ram as an excuse.
"How do you know? You think you know sister better than me?" Rem shouted at him. When Subaru offered no response she continued on.
"And Wilhelm was erased because of me!" She jammed her finger into her chest, "I, caused what happened to him!" Subaru's teeth bit into his lip, "He would want me to stop hurting all of you… he would want me to give up-"
She was cut off by Subaru's outstretched hand slapping her across the face. He hit her so hard that her body fell off of the chair and onto the bed with Wilhelm.
"Say that again," A fire of strength burned within Subaru's eyes. Rem didn't know how to respond, she didn't feel any malice in his strike, but the fire of anger was certainly there. Along with an immense desire to help.
Her tears froze in her eyes. She hesitated. "Say it again. Say those words over the man who always told me to move forward. Next to the man who always told me to stand, even when I wanted to fall into the despair of my own mistakes."
"Say it! Tell me that you won't continue on. Tell me that you'll give up because of one mistake." He demanded her words.
"I'll just make things worse for sister-" She was cut off by Subaru.
"Don't keep trying to use her as an excuse. Ram will always want you by her side, she'll always want you to do better! To dust yourself off and move on past your mistakes." He corrected her, his entire body twisted in vehemence.
No sister is just too nice.
"I hurt him, I caused him to lose everything-" For the third time she was cut off by Subaru.
"Stop using the same damn excuse! He gave his name and his memories, his very existence so you could keep going. Shut the fuck up with that crap! Don't apologize so you can fall into the pit of despair. Do better instead of just giving up. Which would that forgotten man beside you want? Which do you think I want? Which do you think Ram wants?" Subaru had to pause to breathe.
Rem stood up and continued to shout at him. "What could I accomplish by continuing? What could Rem do for sister?"
A snarl of fury grew on his face. He placed his hands on her shoulders, then pulled his head back and slammed it into hers. Rem was knocked to the ground by the force of his headbutt.
"What would you accomplish by giving up? What could you do for Ram by giving up?" Subaru met her questions with his own.
"I could remove the burdens on sister!" Rem answered his question as she pulled herself into a sitting position. Her vision was blasted to the side as Subaru slammed his boot into her cheek.
"Giving up is not how you remove burdens! And if Ram thought you were only a burden, then wouldn't she want you to do better, so you wouldn't be a burden anymore?" Subaru asked her another question.
Rem opened her mouth and let the words tumble out.
"No stop. Stop, stop, stop." She sobbed out, "Wilhelm wouldn't want me to continue,"
"Rem, do you even know Wilhelm. I know him. I know the kind of man he was, and he gave his very existence for you."
"You're wrong, wrong, wrong. Stop lying, stop trying to protect me."
"Rem, if I wanted you to give up, then why would I tell you all of this?"
"Because you hate me, and you want me to-"
"Move forward, and to do better, that's what I want. Trust me. I can speak for myself, and for Wilhelm."
"But you can't speak for sister, she knows what a failure I am. She would just want me to give up." Rem couldn't rouse any more arguments against him and Wilhelm.
"I can speak for Ram when I say, she wants you to move forward. She wants you to be with her." Subaru spoke.
"No, no, no." She shook her head. "Sister hates me. Sister is too nice. She's just trying to protect me."
"So Ram hates you, but wants to protect you?" Subaru questioned her quietly.
"She wants to protect everyone, because she's too kind. And yes. She hates me. Rem took her place. Rem took her spotlight. Rem stole her horn." Her tears continued to pour.
"Then why, has she never demanded anything from you? Why does she never ask for any repayment?"
"Because she's too nice. Too kind. Far too kind. Far, far, far too kind."
"Why would she be so kind if she hates you?"
"Because she's sister, she's brilliant, she's amazing, and she's smart, so she hates Rem. She knows that's the only correct feeling. Too hate Rem."
"If she was smart then couldn't she take advantage of you because she hates you, and she could still be kind to everyone but you by doing so?"
"No, she's too kind, she would never do that, she's never done that."
"Why would she never do that?"
"She's too kind." Subaru kneeled down to her, and let warmth fill his eyes.
"What if... Ram just loves you?"
Rem's voice froze. No words came from her throat. "Sister… loves me?"
"I'm sure you've felt it through your Synesthesia, and I'm sure even without that you've known your whole life. Ram loves you, and she wants you to be with her."
"Sister, loves Rem…" Her tears changed from ones of guilt.
"Yes, of course she loves you. She wants you to stand up. To move past all of your mistakes, and stand with her." Subaru's lips twisted upward a tiny bit.
Tears of joy slipped from her eyes. "You care about me too, don't you? That's why you're doing this. Even after all I've done you care about Rem."
Subaru reached out his hand, "Well what are you an idiot? Of course I care about you. Why the hell would I do all this if I didn't care about you. Now get up off the floor, stand up, and walk with me and Ram. We'll be there the whole time, and if you stumble, we can catch you." Rem tried to wipe away the tears on her face, she wanted the smile she knew was there to be unstained by tears.
"Thank you, Subaru-kun." Rem realized wiping away her tears was futile, so she grasped his hand.
"Oh and Rem, I'm pretty sure we got off on the wrong foot. So how about this, do you want to be friends?" Happiness slipped into his voice. His face remained still, but that look in his eyes. There was happiness in those brown, evil looking eyes.
Rem's own eyes glowed with a newfound determination, and a true joy of her own. "Of course, Subaru-kun, let's be friends." Her smile grew wider, and more tears slipped down her face. They glimmered even in the room's dim light.
"Alright, well come on Rem-chan," Subaru walked toward the door of the room. "Oh and sorry about that," He looked down in guilt.
Rem looked over at Wilhelm's sleeping face, "It's alright, Subaru-kun, friends forgive each other don't they? They forgive each other and then stand side by side."
She turned to the door, and with a resolved stride, followed Subaru toward Sanctuary.
Alright, I hope you enjoyed the chapter. I also want to thank my boi Dyn, for helping make this chapter what it is.