Grimacing, I wince from the painful harsh headache echoing in my head as I slowly manage to regain my vision, blurry at first from the blinding lights until I force my eyes to narrow, focusing on the sounds of footsteps as my brow tightens. I notice a hand waving down at me from afar, once constricts and focused, I look up to find myself lying on a sofa, arms coiled all around me as I spot Dorian smirking, waving at me from above as I groan at my stiff limbs and joints, focusing on my surroundings to find myself…
"Why do you keep doing this to yourself!?" Blinking, I frown at the angered voice of Solas standing from his chair, gently placing his paperwork down as he approaches; helping steady me on his soft sofa.
"Why do you care?" Scowling, I frown at him, feeling vexed as I slap his hand aside, feeling nothing but my tense flowing marks shivering as I jolt up, storming away from him, keeping a distance. I can't I don't I just…leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me alone!
"Fen," Solas calls out to me.
"No! Just…don't, just don't!" Chanting, I step back, already knowing what is to come.
"Fennic!" Solas calls out to me.
"Leave me alone!" Foaming, I scream at him, I won't I'm not, I'm not…horrified, I speed walk away from him, arms crossed shaking feeling my breathe become frantic, my marks glowing as I feel all eyes on me.
"Fennic!" Solas reaches out.
"Leave me alone!" Bustling, I scream at him slamming the door shut to my quarters, marching up the stone stairs into my room. Quickly, I shut the door slamming it shut as I release a huge breathe, falling down from the door I once leaned on, collapsing to my knees releasing a feeble sob of fear shaking, feeling my glassy eyes beginning to water as I seethe, trying to calm myself, taking in my breathe as I cradle my form, rocking it back and forth.
I…I…urgently, I stand up rushing over to my wine rack, swiftly taking the nearest one as I sit down, opening the cork to drink the bottle, enjoying the faint burn of my throat as I lean over only then to feel a familiar iron substance rise up, pushing my drink up from my mouth intermixing with the crimson and alcohol as I release another feral spurt of blood. Distraught, I fall to my knees, trying to take in huge gulps of frantic breathe only to release another spurt of crimson, feeling my gaze turn blurry as I feel my feet begin to sway…crap.
"Fennic!" Loudly, the huge jolt of the door startles me back into focus as I glare at the intruder that is Solas, seething; scowling at me as I glare back, my grip stiffens on my bottle as his eyes widen seeing the faint trial of crimson, reaching out in an attempt to wipe it. No, no, no! Don't touch me, shaking, I stagger back.
"Stay away from me!" I scream at him from the top of my burning lungs.
"Fen stop this please, I lo-"
"DON'T. DON'T YOU DARE SAY THOSE FUCKING WORDS!" Roaring, I scream at him astonishing him.
"Fennic," Solas begins taking a step forward as I take a step back, no, no, no not again, no I know what he'll do, he'll…
"DON'T. I WON'T. I WON'T BE TRICKED, I WON'T BE LIED TO, I WONT BELIEVE YOU, I CANT I WON'T BE HURT AGAIN, I…I…" Boiling, I stagger back cuddling into the corner fearful.
"I know Fen I know of Anders," Solas reveals making my blood turn ice cold feeling scared, feeling my blood boil and my marks erupt almost.
"You know…You know? You know nothing of what that bastard did to me!" Angered, I screech standing up, simmering spitting out the words like poison arms crossed, back turned to him.
"He hurt you friend, he was toxic to you…" Solas reveals making me feel a sharp pain in my chest. No, no he wouldn't, he couldn't he…he…
"He spoke the truth! He spoke his mind free unlike the others hiding the truth they know I'm used goods, they know I'm worn, I'm dirty, I'm nothing they know this, so do you and everyone else, Anders was the only one with the free mind," Sharply, I argue saying how it is everyone is a liar, can't trust anyone…
"No Fen. He wasn't. He was deranged. He was using you Fen." Solas whispers his tone calm and gentle as I scream.
"Oh stop, you think the same as everyone else!" I scoff fed up with the lies, they are all liars…
"That isn't true," Solas refuses making me roll my eyes.
"Stop lying to me!" I screech fed up, I'm used, I'm ugly, I'm not…I'm not Eve, I'm not all proper and shit, I'm not Merrill, I'm not Isabela I'm nobody…
"I'm not. Fen you are beautiful you are strong, you are loving and kind, you are beautiful, what Anders said to you, it wasn't normal Fen, those things he said hurt you and if I ever meet him. I will make sure he pays. You deserve better, what will make you see that?" Solas pleads getting on his knees, pleading as I feel his hands on my own making me turn away pained.
"I…I don't know!" I scream, feeling tears threaten to fall as I collapse on my bed, tired and exhausted, trying to push back the tears, I can't, I refuse to show weakness.
"Ar lasa mala revas Ar lath ma, vhenan Ir abelas, ma vhenan…" Softly, Solas whispers placing his lips delicately on my face, littering my face, my neck, my body with subtle kisses.
"What gibberish are you spouting now?" Grumbling, I sigh shaking my head at his alien words.
"It's true, I mean it…" Seriously, Solas vows making me blink at the sheer seriousness of his tone, geez whatever he said must be serious, wonder what it was…
"What…happened?" I question lost too tired, wanting to change topic as we return back to Solas's room on his sofa, where he often naps in. I feel Solas softly hug me as I lay in his arms in his lap, feeling his fingertip's gently rub circles into my waist, planting sweet chase kisses to my temple as Solas gently places his hand on my head, gently easing me.
"You ran straight into battle like a fool! And coughed up litres of blood, you fainted in my arms," Bitterly, Solas scowls.
"Huh…" I mutter.
"Don't act so casual about this, this ends now!" He scowls.
"Fighting?" I scowl.
"Hurting yourself on purpose, letting Bull chuck you what if he hadn't thrown you hard enough you'd be dead, what if you got captured again what if…" Solas babbles as I stand up.
"Let me worry about that if, those are my issues. Solas, I've been fighting for my entire life," I argue.
"And one day you're not going to wake up." Grimly, he turns away.
"Solas…did I…scare you? "I blink surprised as he turns away pained. Silently, Solas turns his head about to respond as I sigh.
"Never mind," I sigh noticing his conflicted expression.
"You should rest…"He whispers as my brow furrows noting how drained he looks, how tired, how exhausted then again he's really the only mage I go to with any health issues since most fear me and others…I don't trust as much as him. Gently, I place my hands on him noting the pain in his eyes as he slowly looks up, his tired grey amethysts meeting my stern blues as my hands slightly moves up to caress his cheeks, enjoying the heat of his feature as I bring him close, my temple touching his as he releases a tired breathe, enjoying the comforting gesture and touch.
"Fen…"
"I'm here…Solas, I'm not going anywhere…" Softly, I assure him in a soft whisper making him relax, feeling his tense muscles unstiffen as smirking, I lean in, gently placing my lips upon his, starling him as he strongly returns the kiss hungrily, leaning in as I feel my rough, thin, dry lips meet his smooth longing ones as desperately, almost reluctantly, he removes his lips from me.
"We shouldn't be doing this," He whispers flushed, ruby red.
"Oh please what's the worst that could happen? It's not the first time heck not even the second," I scoff, coiling my hands over his shoulder, leaning in smirking as he dives in, his soon gentle, loving, chaste kisses turn hungry, taking me aback by the sudden dominant nature as shocked, he takes over using my surprise to take control as briefly, I look up seeing a wide eyed grinning Dorian snickering as gently, I manage to remove his hungry lips from me, panting as I smirk and gesture to his door.
"Come on," Smirking, I watch as he stands and nods, my eyes widening to see Solas take the lead, guiding me back to my room, for a night of fun…hey not like I'm complaining. Excited, I smirk at the feverish kisses exchanged, the hot flustered desperate kisses but most of all the hungry lips upon me as we head to my quavers for some...one on one training.
Stretching, I smirk satisfied in my bed as I feel a familiar body heat curled into mine as I happily return the hug, nuzzling into his slumbering side, smirking at the numerous marks littered all over his throat and collarbone, he's going to kill me when he wakes up heh…I'll say this though, the guy is a beast in the sheets, much better than the fade fun. Groaning, I am greeted by Solas' groan, his hot breathe on my neck as he nuzzles into my neck, placing gentle kisses upon the crook of my neck, apologetic ones while I smirk at the faint hickey he gave from the start of all this.
"I got to admit it was weird," I blurt out smirking at how adorable clinging Solas is considering his aloof nature.
"What?" He mutters.
"Isabela had told me about body worshipping didn't know someone could have a kink for it," Casually, I shrug as sheepishly, Solas mumbles, still tired as he uses his fingers to rub his eyes, trying to wake up.
"Must you be so blunt about such private matters?" Groggily, he whispers, a ruby red tint to his checks, hand covering his flustered face making me smirk.
"Relax, I'm not going to tell anyone, I think it's nice, new though, I might ask you again sometime, I see why people say you have a silver tongue," Coyly, I smirk snickering as Solas groans at the poor joke.
"New?" He questions, blocking out my joke.
"Yes, most of the nights I've had, been quick and easy, I got to admit, I'm impressed I'm typically the one in charge who would have thought a bookworm like you could be dominant," Sneakily, I smirk placing a gentle kiss on his lips once more only for his tired lips to meet mine as he hums, pleased with the chaste peck.
"Never judge a book by its cover then Vhenan," He mutters making me smirk as I then attempt to leave the bed, only then to feel familiar heated, lean, slightly muscular pair of arms coil around my bare waist bringing me back on my bed as I turn, brow raised at the grumpy Solas, head down on the crook of my neck.
"Don't go…" He groans desperate, pleadingly making me smile at the idiot as gently, I place my fingertips on his cheeks, gently moving them upwards for my lips to meet his once more, in a short teasing kiss.
"I'm not leaving." I assure him.
"So we're…a thing?" He frowns.
"If you want to," I shrug.
"I'd…" He trails off conflicted in silence for a minute or so.
"You had enough time to think about it?" Lightly, I tease him.
"Yes, I want this." He whispers sincerely making me smile and lean against his bowed temple, smirking.
"I've learned that now but still I'm impressed…" I smirk.
"You are?" He raises a brow.
"Yeah your stamina not many typically can handle me, not even Zev…" I bring up recalling most nights of me being dissatisfied, the amount of types I've had to fake it for them was the saddest aspect of all.
"Must you bring him up when we're in bed?" Scowling, Solas huffs bringing a smug smile to my lips as playfully, I give him numerous pecks around the collarbone, earning a small moan from him, making my sly smirk widen.
"Oh don't be jealous," I tease as he grumbles, curse words of Dalish or elven no doubt.
"Now if you'll excuse me I got to meet up with Bull," Smugly, I smirk at his frown.
"Why?" He questions lost as I note the disdain in his tone.
"He's been worried," I shrug.
"How do you know about that barbarian?" Solas scoffs.
"That barbarian has feelings, besides he's a good guy, he's tried to reach out to you Solas, but you pushed him away. Come on give him a chance, for me," Pleadingly, I lean in, mischievously ghosting my lips over his, earning a groan from said male, arms wrapped around my bare torso as I look up to smirk mockingly at the frowning male.
"I'll try, for you," He huffs bringing a smirk to my lips as I give him a fleeting kiss just as his arms coil round me for another round, I slither out much to his disappointment and annoyance as quickly, I change back into my gear and leave the frowning male in my bed, heading to the tavern…