Okay. Mitsuki is not a miko or a shinigami. Any more guesses? The title of Master is still not won...

Chapter 6: Chicken Soup for the Ninja Soul

Kakashi turned his head to stare at the ceiling, counting the 73 cracks in it carefully. He was board. Hell, he was going stir crazy being locked up in here. Tsunade had forbidden him from reading any of his books in his room and after three hours of daytime talk shows, Kakashi had sworn to never turn a Tv on again. Worst of all, his escape attempt had been foiled by Tsunade electrifying the window ledge. The shock of powerful electricity had burned his hands badly causing his stay at the hospital to be extended by another week. The sadistic smile Tsunade had been wearing when she'd informed of him of this had really been quite scary, Kakashi remembered. He decided to count the 142 leaves on the tree outside his window again.

There had to be something interesting to do...

"KAKASHI-SENSEI!" Naruto shouted, violently opening the door to his hospital room, a happy look on the blond's face. Sasuke and Sakura silently stood behind him, Sakura holding a small vase with a mini-sunflower in it.

Kakashi mentally sighed. His students wasn't exactly what he'd been thinking of when he'd wanted something interesting. He actually had been looking for the newest volume of Make-Out Violence, right off the shelf... "Ohiyo!" he said smiling brightly at his students. "Been having fun?"

Naruto nodded while Sasuke and Sakura shook their heads vehemently. "We've been training with Gai!" Naruto said, sounding excited.

"Get well soon, Kakashi-sensei," Sakura said, setting the flower down on Kakashi's beside table. "Please, please, get well soon."

Sasuke nodded in agreement, an earnest look in his eyes.

Kakashi continued to smile. Gai, huh? Tsunade really was a sadist at heart. "So what has Gai been teaching you?" he asked, deciding that small talk was (for once) better then being left to do nothing.

"Taijutsu!" Naruto said smiling. "Gai taught us how to walk on coals and do all these cool kicks and use our weapons better and..."

"That's enough, Naruto," Sakura growled, worried that Kakashi might get the wrong idea. "Gai-sensei really hasn't been around all that much," she told Kakashi, smiling pleasantly. "Whenever we see him, he seems to be looking for something and usually just tells us what to do before rushing off."

Kakashi nodded, wondering what it was that Gai was looking for. Actually, that reminded him, he should start finding out what had happened to Mitsuki after the battle. He hadn't seen her since he'd fallen asleep and she was his responsibility after all...

"Ne, Kakashi-sensei, when are you going to be released?" Sakura asked, a hopeful look in her eyes. She silently prayed that he would be out sooner rather then later. Whenever Gai had been around he'd paired her with Ten-Ten and well... Ten-Ten scared the crap out of her. The girl was incredibly violent and bloodthirsty, and whenever they fought she ended up going for the kill, trying to hit Sakura with a dagger or a scythe.

"In two weeks, maybe more," Kakashi said, giving Sakura an apologetic look. "Tsunade says that I've broken all but one of my ribs and that I have to stay still long enough for them to heal."

Naruto winced. That sounded painful. "So you're alright, Kaka-sensei?"

"Hai, daijoubu," Kakashi said smiling. "I'm so doped up on painkillers that I can't feel anything."

Sakura and Sasuke sweatdropped as Naruto gave him a blank look. "Huh?"

Sakura sighed and started to herd Naruto out of the room. "Well, get well soon Kakashi-sensei," she said smiling. Sasuke gave his teacher a nod and walked out of the room, silently shutting the door behind him.

Resting back against his bed, Kakashi sighed a little, wincing at the pain in his chest. Really, he'd been lucky, he thought to himself, studying the cracks in the ceiling again. Tsunade had told him that to take down those three oni, four of Konoha's best had been killed, and five had been badly injured (including him). His had been the worst though, she'd admitted, checking her chart. The others had just suffered one or two broken limbs or a bad scratch or nasty bite. He'd been the only one to nearly have his chest knocked in. Despite that, he'd been the only one who, after being injured, got back up and started fighting again...

There was a soft knock on the door, followed by it opening a crack. "Kakashi-san? Mitsuki said peeking her head through the opening she'd made.

"Ah, Mitsuki-chan, come in," Kakashi said, smiling at his guest. "How have you been?"

"Fine," Mitsuki said, sitting down in a chair, setting a bag on the ground beside her. "I'm just fine. But how have you been Kakashi-san?"

"Good, I suppose. Tsunade says I should be out in about two weeks."

"Two weeks?" Mitsuki gasped, looking concerned. "That's a long time... What happened to your hands, Kakashi-san?"

Kakashi glanced down at the bandages and frowned. "Nothing really, just being foolish. So what brings you here?"

Mitsuki smiled, reaching down to grab the bag she had brought. "I've brought you lunch," she said happily, pulling out a tightly sealed container. "Gai-kun said that hospital food was disgusting so I decided to bring you good food instead."

Kakashi nodded, accepting the warm container. "What is it?" he asked fumbling a bit before carefully pulling the lid off.

"Chicken and rice soup," Mitsuki said looking through her bag for something. "I know I have a spoon in here somewhere," she muttered to herself, searching carefully.

"Oishi," Kakashi sighed handing the empty container back to Mitsuki. "Domo arigatou, Mitsuki-chan."

Mitsuki blinked. She hadn't even given him the spoon before he'd devoured the food. Maybe he wasn't eating it, and just absorbing it somehow? Putting the now empty container back into her bag, she smiled. Oh well, so long as he'd eaten it, that was fine. "So how to you do you feel now, Kakashi-san?"

Kakashi looked at her, his single visible eye drooping. Swaying slightly, he looked puzzled for a moment before falling back onto the bed, unconscious.

"That's good," she said nodding. Standing, Mitsuki picked up her bag and left the room, turning off the light and shutting the door behind her.

-

-

"....god damn... shi! ....ke up already!" There was a pause. "Well, in that case I'll just have to see what's under your mask..." Kakashi sat bolt upright in bed, causing Tsunade to pout a little. "Figures that would wake you up," she muttered, sighing.

Kakashi looked up at her, trying to clear the cobwebs from his mind. "What happened?" he asked groggily.

"You've been sleeping for almost 24 hours," Tsunade said dryly. "It's time to change your bandages."

"24 hours?" Wow, if that was true, he'd have to sleep that much all the time... He felt great. Stretching, Kakashi held out his hands for Tsunade to deal with, studying her carefully. Maybe if she was in a good mood today he could convince her to let him have his books?

As if reading his mind, Tsunade shook her head firmly. "No. No books until your hands heal," she said grinning slightly.

Kakashi looked at her grin and decided not to mention that it was her fault that his hands had been burned so badly. Damn Hokage setting up such horrible traps to keep her patients where they could be healed and looked after. "But what about after my hands are healed?" he suggested hopefully.

Tsunade sighed although inwardly she was amused by Kakashi's obsession with Jiraiya's works. Maybe she should read them one day to see what the big fuss was about? ......or not. "I'll think about it once your hands are..." she trailed off, the first bandage off. ... the hell? "Give me your other hand," she ordered, dropping the first to the bed.

Kakashi nodded absently, holding up his other hand. Quickly, Tsunade unwrapped this one only to find that it was in the same state as the first. Both were perfectly fine, the burns healed without any scarring. There should have been some scarring, Tsunade thought to herself. What isn't there scarring?

I wonder what the matter is, Kakashi thought as Tsunade stared intently at his hands. She wouldn't act like this if they were infected...

"You're hands...." Tsunade said slowly. "Are fine..."

Kakashi blinked, and studied his hands closely. "Hmm... How about my reading material then?"

"Take off your shirt."

"Pardon?"

"Take it off Kakashi."

At the threatening tone in Tsunade's voice, Kakashi quickly unbuttoned the shirt of his hospital pajamas, letting Tsunade study his chest. She poked him a few times muttering under her breath. "Oi, Kakashi, does this hurt?" she asked poking the right side of his chest.

"No."

"What about here?"

"Nope."

"Here?"

"No?"

This continued for another minute or two, Tsunade getting more and more annoyed. Finally she snapped, holding back the desire to punch the jounin. "Get the hell out of here!" she shouted instead, throwing her hands up in disgust.

Kakashi blinked, surprised. "You said I couldn't leave for two weeks."

"Yeah, well that was before you healed in two days!" Tsunade growled, cursing inwardly.

Shrugging, Kakashi got out of bed, and grabbed the spare set of clothes that someone had brought him from home. He headed towards the bathroom to change only to be cut off by Tsunade who forcefully sat him down in a chair. "How the hell did you do it?" she demanded, sticking a finger in Kakashi's face.

"What?"

"No one can heal that quickly in two days. What jutsu did you use?" her face darkened scarily. "Tell. Me. Now."

Kakashi smiled at her weakly. "Sumimasen Tsunade-sama... Demo boku wa... wakarimasen..."1

Tsunade's eye twitched and she glared at him. "Then tell me everything that happened to you starting after when your wounds were bandaged."

"I tried to leave and the window was electrified."

"After that."

"You bandaged my hands and told me that you'd already set a worse trap on the window to prevent me from escaping again."

"After that too."

"I watched Tv."

"What shows?"

"Dr. Phil, Maury, and the Jenny Jones Show."

"...."

"The remote was broken."

"...Okay... What happened after that?"

"Sasuke, Naruto, and Sakura came and visited me." He nodded over to the sunflower on the bedside table. "Sakura brought me that."

Tsunade instantly pounced on the sunflower, studying it intently. "Seems normal enough..." she finally said, feeling disappointed. "What next?"

"Mitsuki came."

Bingo! Tsunade thought, happily. Who else had bizarre healing powers? Mitsuki of course! "What happened after Mitsuki came?"

"She brought me lunch, I ate it, and then... I must have fallen asleep. I can't remember anything after that."

Tsunade was instantly out of the door, intent on finding Mitsuki. She was going to find out the girl's healing secrets if it was the last thing she would do...

Kakashi blinked as Tsunade vanished. Well, he wondered silently, maybe this'll make check out easier...

-

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"You're move, Kawamizu-kun,2" Mitsuki said, smiling at a thoughtful looking Kappa.

Kawamizu waved for her to be silent with a webbed hand, before moving one of his pieces, capturing her silver general and (turning the piece around) set it down in a new spot. Mitsuki looked at the board, pouting a little. At this rate her king was going to be captured soon and she'd loose this game of shogi...

"MITSUKI-CHAN!" Gai's voice shouted. "DOKO DE?"3

Mitsuki sighed, giving the kappa an apologetic look. "Sorry, Kawamiku-kun. He must have realized that I was gone."

Kawamizu snorted waving his hand in a dismissing gesture. Clearly, he was telling her to forget about him and just play the game. Smiling, Mitsuki nodded and decided to do just that.4

-

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"What do you mean you lost track of her!?" Tsunade yelled at Gai, glaring at the taller man. "She's not a ninja! She doesn't know how to hide herself!"

Gai laughed weakly, trying not to appear cowed by Tsunade's anger. "Ano.. I was focusing on training so much that I must have forgotten about her..."

"Forgot about her!? Keeping track of that girl is an A-rank mission!" Tsunade bellowed, Gai shrinking another inch. Come to think of it, Kakashi hadn't done all that great of a job keeping track of the girl either, Tsunade realized suddenly. Leaving her free to get attacked by oni like that... "AM I SURROUNDED BY IDIOTS!?" Turning to Naruto, Sasuke, Sakura, Lee, Ten-Ten, and Neji she pointed to all of them and shouted: "Find her!"

Naruto slowly raised a hand. "Ano... Tsunade-baba... You mean the kappa-lady, right?"

Tsunade rolled her eyes while everyone else looked at Naruto confused. Kappa? What was that? "Yes, Naruto-kun," she sighed. "She's the one who identified the kappa."

The blond boy instantly brightened. "I know where she is then!"

"What!? Where?"

"Kappa-lady headed toward the Kappa pond two hours ago!"

Tsunade grinned. "Great! Now which pond is that?"

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Sighing in relief, Mitsuki captured the tokin that had been wreaking havoc on her pieces. So what if now it was captured it was only a pawn now? At least it wasn't Kawamizu's tokin anymore... Looking carefully at the board she considered where she should set it down. It may be only a pawn, but any piece could be helpful in defending her king...

"Mitsuki! I need to talk to you!" Tsunade yelled, bursting out of the tree line and screeching to a halt, inches from the board. "What are you doing?"

"Playing shoji," Mitsuki said as the kappa gave the woman a 'well, duh!' look.

"Shoji?" Naruto asked, looking around Tsunade. "What's that?"

The kappa looked at the boy like he was a blasphemer, shaking his head sadly. 'Kids these days,' he seemed to say. "I'll explain later," Mitsuki said turning back to the board.

"Yeah," Tsunade agreed sternly. "She has to explain something to me first!"

Flustered, Mitsuki looked at Tsunade puzzled. "What?"

Tsunade rolled her eyes, giving the kappa a weary look. That thing didn't look all that dangerous... How had it managed to defeat a chunin then? "Just hurry up and finish the game," Tsunade snapped, tapping her foot.

Suddenly nervous, Mitsuki set down her pawn, realizing her mistake only after she had released her piece. "Oh!" she gasped.

Kawamizu leaped to is feet pointing an accusing finger at the board. "NIFU!!!" he shouted glaring at Mitsuki.

Mitsuki bowed lowly. "Gomen nasai, Kawamizu-kun," she said apologetically. "I really didn't mean to place my pawn in the same file as the other..."5

Kawamizu shrugged, picking up the pieces and placing them in a bag. "Not a problem," he said handing both the bag and the board to the girl. "Come by and play anytime. Maybe I'll let you win next time..."

Naruto and Tsunade stared. It could talk?

Mitsuki looked down at the bag and board in shock. "Are these... for me?"

"Hai," the kappa said nodding. "It's hard to keep them dry underwater," he explained, walking back into his pond. "Besides, this way you can practice at home."

Bowing, Mitsuki repeatedly thanked him until Kawamizu vanished under the water. Grinning widely, she clutched the board to her chest and turned to the still shocked Tsunade. "You needed me, Tsunade-sama?"

Tsunade blinked and put the talking reptile out of mind. "Yes, Mitsuki-chan I need to talk about the soup you made Kakashi."

"Why?" Mitsuki asked, looking concerned. "Doesn't he feel better?"

Tsunade shook her head. "That's not it, he's perfectly fine. All his injuries are gone. All of them!"

"Does that mean Kaka-sensei's going to be training us again?" Naruto asked.

Tsunade glanced down at him. She'd forgotten he was there for a second... "Go back to Gai, Naruto."

"But-"

"Now."

"Fine..."

Tsunade waited until she felt the boy's chakra grow fainter before turning back to Mitsuki. "Well? What was in it?"

Mitsuki looked thoughtful, thinking carefully. "Carrots, celery, a little onion, salt, pepper, garlic, some bay leaves, rice and..." she hesitated, not able to remember the last ingredient. "Chicken!"

Tsunade hung her head, sighing. "You sure that's it? You didn't add anything else?" If she hadn't added anything, that meant the girl's presence could have speeded up Kakashi's recovery, making the secret of 'why' harder to determine.

Mitsuki thought for another long moment. "Yes!" she said snapping her fingers. "I remember. I was talking to Kawamizu-kun about it, just after the oni attack (So that's where she was, Tsunade thought.) and he suggested I make soup! He gave me the recipe and the secret ingredient!"

Bingo. "What's the secret ingredient?" Tsunade asked eagerly, leaning forward a bit.

Mitsuki shrugged. "I don't know. All I know is that Kawamizu-kun told me that it would put Kakashi-san to sleep and make him feel better."

"Kawamizu-san... He's the kappa, right?" Tsunade asked, looking at the water. "Can you get him up here?"

Mitsuki turned to the pond. "I'll see if he wants to talk," she said kneeling down. "Kawamizu-kun! Tsunade-sama wants to talk to you. Can you spare a moment?"

Slowly the kappa rose in the middle of the pond, only his strange water filled head, his eyes, and his beak-like mouth visible. "Wadda want?" he asked, looking suspicious. Humans hadn't wanted anything to do with him before. Why did one want to talk to him now?

Tsunade smiled at the creature. "I wanted to know what you gave Mitsuki-chan to put in that soup she made. It worked miracles, and I wanted to know if there was any way I could get a steady supply of it."

Kawamizu eyed her carefully debating if he should tell her the truth or not. Why not? he thought. "It was water out of my head," he said and sank back into the pond.

Tsunade blinked as Mitsuki seemed to reach an epiphany. "Of course!" she said. "Kappa are said to have a life-sustaining elixir contained in the crater of their head. That must have been what he gave me."

Tsunade frowned. That was kinda... gross. "Any way he'd give us more?" she asked turning back towards the village.

Mitsuki followed her, still holding the precious shoji board tightly to her. "Only in emergencies maybe," she said smiling. "Kawamizu-kun will be weakened whenever he loses some of his elixir."

Tsunde smiled a little and, reaching up a little, ruffled Mitsuki's hair. "You going to tell that you gave Kakashi kappa-brain to eat?"

Mitsuki looked horrified. "It's not kappa-brain!" she protested. "It's elixir!"

"From his head..."

"True," she looked concerned, following Tsunade through the main gates of town. "Perhaps he won't ask?"

Tsunade laughed. "Come one, let's see if Kakashi managed to escape from the hospital yet..."

-

-

(Meanwhile...)

Kakashi sighed. He hadn't thought that there was anything worse then being trapped in a hospital room watching daytime Tv. He had been so wrong...

Seemingly hundreds of screaming, crying, whiny kids were climbing all over him demanding attention and entertainment as Kaede smiled at him happily. She had been so pleased when she'd found the clown walking down the hall. She had thought he had said that he was never going to come back to this insanity as long as he lived. That horrible man... Refusing to like children simply because one of the more playful tots had set his wig on fire... However, now that he was back all ill thoughts were forgotten as the children ran around the tall man, laughing happily. This was heaven...

This was hell. Kakashi realized this as he had to snatch away his kunai from a small child, the child screaming the instant it's toy was taken away. How had this happened again? Oh yeah... the nurse with the grip of iron... Safely tucking all his sharp weapons away (and not noticing that his summoning scrolls had been taken) he waded through the sea of children to a small, much abused puppet theater. Picking up a cutesy English Knight puppet he studied it carefully before reaching a decision. "Who wants puppet time?" he asked cheerfully. The children about him cheered loudly, nearly breaking his ear drums.

Smiling, Kakashi shadow cloned himself, each clone picking up a separate puppet and going behind the theater to put on the show. As the children cheered over the magic trick, Kakashi grinned once more and began (with the aid of his clones) to do his rendition of the 'Brave Sir Robin.'6 The children waited as the clones opened their mouths then vanished into smoke, Kakashi succeeding in his mission to race out the back exit.

The children raved about the magic show for weeks. Especially since never before had there even been a back exit...

-

-

"Kakashi-san? Are you here?" a voice called from the front entrance.

"Living room," Kakashi called from the couch, not even bothering to look up from his book. (The newest volume of Make-Out Violence, bought today as he had walked home.) How he had missed his manga... He was never going to abandon his precious books again... A shadow fell over his page and Kakashi looked up, seeing a beaming Mitsuki holding out an envelope towards him. "What's this?" he asked, dog-earing his page and accepting the envelope.

"Tsunade-sama gave it to me," Mitsuki said giggling slightly.

Kakashi looked at the envelope wearily and opened it. To his great surprise it was full of money. "Hmm... What's this for?" he asked, looking up.

Mitsuki giggled again, pure mirth in her eyes. Leaning over, she patted Kakashi on his spiky hair and grinned. "For making the kiddies happy, silly," she laughed. "Tsunade said you could have made the show longer, but you kept them entertained so you got a reward!" She smiled at the blank way he was staring at the money. "I'll start dinner."

Damn, Kakashi thought. Entertainers make this much for that crap? "No need," he said, rising. "Let's go out."

"Demo..."

"Out. I need to buy some stuff anyway," he said, carefully tucking the money away into a pocket.

Mitsuki shrugged, but nodded, going to fetch an old coat Tsunade had given her for the evenings. As Kakashi waited for her to reappear, he mused the money in his pocket, smiling slightly. An entire month's salary for less then ten minutes work? He knew that Tsunade would kill him if he spent it all on books. Good thing Jiraiya wasn't due for a new volume for another week or two... Still smiling he tucked his manga in a pocket before realizing something. "Where's my scrolls?"

-

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1: Sorry Tsunade-sama... But I....don't know...

2: Yes, the Kappa's name is River Water. I was uninspired... Blame calc.

3: Literal: Where? (When actually said in Japanese in relation to a person it's more like 'Where are you?')

4: Shoji Part 1: It's the Japanese version of chess. See below for full details, but all you really have to know to explain this passage is that the silver general is one of the pieces in shoji and that when your opponent captures your piece, they can pick it up, turn the piece around (rotate it 180), and use it as their own.

5: Shoji Part 2: Like Western Chess, pieces can be powered up once they reach the other side of the board. However, while only pawns can turn into kings in WC, in shoji any piece can become super charged (except kings I think...) What a tokin is, is a supercharged pawn, one that can wreck havoc easily because when charged it can move in practically every direction. However, when it's captured the charge is lost and it becomes an ordinary pawn once more. What happened, when Mitsuki captured the tokin is this: it became a pawn again and she looked for a place to set it down as one of her own pieces. However, she was interrupted and set it down in a file that another pawn was in (basically the same row). This is considered a losing move in shoji, sort of like cheating. When it happens, your opponent is supposed to say "Nifu" which sort of means "you lost." Or as I like to think; "Hah! You lost the game bi-yatch! Kiss my $$!" Hey, we all know that the Japanese are secretly thinking it on the inside...

6: What? Brave Sir Robin ran away. It fits!

Shoji Part 3: Want to know the rest of the rules of shoji? Well I'm too lazy to tell you. Instead, I'll instead suggest the site Basic Rules of Shoji by Sam Sloan, a 2-dan. (That means he's really good. Not a uber l337 master, but still good.)

The web site address is: www ishipress com/shoji htm   (Replace the spaces with periods. I had to leave those off so that FFnet wouldn't delete the text.) Or Google search Basic Rules Shoji.

It's a good site and the song that plays in the background is the traditional tune 'Sakura!' Always a good sign!

I'll do it once more... Reviews!

Dragon Man 180: Well, the kappa turned out to be helpful in this chapter... Kitsunes are in the next one, I promise. I'm still debating about Tanuki though... I haven't been able to find any really good myths on them. All them seem to do is stand around with a sake bottle, airing their balls...

Vanilla Yumez: Well, technically you reviewed Chap 3 but... No, she's not a shinigami. Although Chapter 5 (6 by 's count) really did give a pretty good hint. (Hint: The oni's called her a bird.)

Lady Light: (cries) I know... I miss Obito already... I just could keep he and Kakashi apart anymore and he had to move on once he finished his unfinished business of making Kakashi move on. (Reads last sentence slowly) I think I made sense... Anywhoo, he's gone, end of that little sidetrack.

sna: Fuzzy logic at it's best... Really glad you liked that bit, it actually was my favorite line of the chapter...

YES! I'M DONE AND IT'S NOT 2 IN THE MORNING!!!

I've only got an chem exam tomorrow that I haven't studied for... Shit...

JaDErUst