Summary: "Quinn, you don't break up with people because they don't like the same things you do." She rests her hands on her knees and looks up at the blonde. "I know you like a good amount of bacon to start your day, but it's okay if she doesn't. I don't like it, but we're still friends." She chuckles.
"Gosh, it's not that." Quinn scoffs at her. "Do you think I would break up with someone over something trivial like bacon?"
A/N: Joining the "Faberry Month" challenge, this is my take for the Prompt #5 "Break Up"
I would die for you in secret
She breaks up with Finn. She does it soon after she finds out about what happened with Brody and she is furious. She is furious because she is no one's property, let alone Finn Hudson's. She is not his and that's why it's not even a real breakup per se, rather than closing that part of her life once and for all.,
The ship has sailed a long time ago and, she has moved on despite the temporary lapse of judgement after Mr. Schue's wedding. It was a mistake. Just a big mistake.
"I'm serious, Quinn, Finn and I are over for good." They're walking back to the girl's dorm after an early dinner off campus. She must say that Yale is as beautiful as she has always imagined an Ivy League to be. With the classical buildings and the parks surrounding the campus, she feels like she's in a tv show. One of those shows they always tend to watch together.
"I believe your words and I am pretty sure you have all the good intentions to keep it that way…" Quinn looks at her with a sideways glance. "It's you and Finn, Rachel. You've been chasing each other for so long that you'll get back together because you miss each other too much."
"You don't believe me." Rachel stops walking, but it takes a few seconds for Quinn to register that. So, she is ahead of her.
"Rachel." Quinn turns to look at her and the sight before her eyes makes her heart clench. "I believe you, of course I do."
"No, you don't." She wipes a lone tear away. She doesn't like to cry in front of people. Let alone in front of the girl who is behind her tears. "I could always catch the 8pm train." She mutters to herself and walks past the blonde, who grabs her by the hand and pulls her into her arms in the middle of the walk path back to her dorm.
"I believe you, Rachel." Quinn whispers in her ear and tightens her grip around her waist, keeping the brunette pressed up in her front. "I know how much Finn means to you. But if you say that it's over, I believe you."
"You're not just saying it?" She nuzzles her face against the side of the blonde's designer coat. She always smells like springtime, even in March.
"I got you, okay? Whatever happens or whatever he will try to do to win you back, I got your back." Quinn kisses the side of her face. "He won't give up on you, but who would in his shoes?"
"He doesn't own me." She grips Quinn's coat with both hands. The anger fuels her and the disappointment clouds her mind. "He can try, but he had no right to do what he did."
"He took that choice away from you and as much as Brody was in the wrong for having lied to you, it wasn't Finn's choice to push him out of your life. He is your boyfriend." Quinn nods and looks down into her eyes.
"I broke up with Brody." Rachel drops her forehead against her shoulder and Quinn holds her a little closer. "I couldn't after what happened. It's not just his fault…"
"I know, but some things are just bound to happen. Did he take it bad?" She shifts them around when a group of students walks past them and they're somehow blocking the path.
"He knew it before I talked to him. He was the first guy I had after Finn." She looks up at Quinn. "After Lima. I thought…I thought he's be different."
"It's just the first guy, Rachel." Quinn strokes a lock away from her face. "You just got a life away from home, give yourself time." She smiles softly. "Let's go back to my dorm, I think there is a cup of vegan hot chocolate calling for you."
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Christine is a classical beauty, and she gets why someone like her could catch Quinn's attention. With her dirty blonde hair, her green eyes and a smile that brings her back to New England, where she grew up.
Rachel meets her the last weekend of Spring Break when she turns down the idea of going back to Lima and running into Finn, to spend it with Quinn in New Haven.
Quinn introduces her new girlfriend over dinner, and she can't help the short pang of jealousy when they sit a little too closer, or when Christine leans over to check the menu out and places a quick kiss against her pulse point.
It's quick, really. But it is intimate enough to send the message through. Quinn is with her. Quinn is free to date whomever she wants, and she has picked her over anyone else.
By the time May turns into June, Rachel has seen less and less of what is supposed to be her best friend. The Metro North passes sit on her nightstand untouched. Between NYADA and the cancelled plans, she hasn't visited Quinn for almost two months since Spring Break.
She is about to spend another night in, sitting on the couch with a bowl of popcorn in her lap, when the knock happens. She furrows her brows and reaches for the baseball bat by the door. The neighborhood is nice, but not that nice to feel completely safe.
"Who is it?" Rachel leans against the metal door. They should invest in a peephole.
"Rach, it's me." Quinn's voice is muffled on the other side and Rachel is quick to pull the door open. "Is that for me? Do you want to hit me here or can I come in?"
"Safety is important, Quinn." She drops the bat aside and shuts the door after the blonde. "I didn't expect you at this late hour. Did I miss your call?"
"It was a last-minute thing really." Quinn kicks her shoes aside and takes the faux-leather jacket off. "Am I interrupting something?"
"Just a Rachel Berry lonely night. Do you want something to eat? I can cook something, or we can order in." Rachel starts walking towards the small kitchen area.
"I broke up with Christine." Quinn's voice stops her in her tracks.
"What? When? Why?" Rachel turns to look at her. She is not sure how to react to that. Is it relief? Is it fear? She doesn't know how to feel.
"A few hours ago." Quinn drops in the armchair and reaches for the bottle of wine on the coffee table. She pours herself a full glass and takes a long sip.
"Hey. Slow down. Talk to me." She kneels in front of Quinn and takes the glass away from her. She sits it behind herself, not even caring if she has placed it on a coaster or not. She'll deal from Kurt later. "What happened?"
"It's nothing. We just didn't agree on some things." She shrugs it off and looks away.
"Quinn, you don't break up with people because they don't like the same things you do." She rests her hands on her knees and looks up at the blonde. "I know you like a good amount of bacon to start your day, but it's okay if she doesn't. I don't like it, but we're still friends." She chuckles.
"Gosh, it's not that." Quinn scoffs at her. "Do you think I would break up with someone over something trivial like bacon?"
"Is it because she doesn't like Star Wars? She didn't like the movies, did she?" She reaches for Quinn's fists and unwraps them.
"Neither did you." She looks at Rachel and laces their fingers together.
"But we have a deal. We watch a movie of your choice and then we watch one I like." Rachel squeezes her fingers around hers.
"She didn't like my best friend." Quinn furrows her brows and looks down at their hands.
"Well, Santana can be quite standoffish and rude, but she grows on you. Maybe if you-"
"It's you, Rachel." Quinn brushes her thumbs over the back of her hands. "She doesn't like you."
"Oh." It is Rachel's turn to raise her brows. She is confused. "Why? I barely spoke to her and we haven't seen each other in weeks. I gave you space to live your relationship with her."
"And I missed you." Quinn tugs her off the floor and gently guides her over her knees, sitting her on her lap. "I missed you and she didn't like that I did."
"I missed you too." Rachel nods softly.
"I can't be with someone who doesn't like you." Quinn rests her head sideways against her shoulder and closes her eyes. Rachel doesn't know how to reply to that. She doesn't know how to feel about that. She doesn't know how to deal with the warmth filling her chest, after that small yet meaningful confession.
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"He is an idiot, Hobbit. Don't you see it?" Santana paces back and forth in front of her, alternating Spanish and English words, but she is pretty sure they're all curse words.
"I don't understand why you would say such a thing. Parker invited us all here to celebrate Labor Day and you are still bad mouthing him." She looks over at the tall guy standing by the DJ stand, talking to him behind the console.
"He invited you and you decided we could tag along." She shakes her head. "He is doing all of this to impress you and add your notch to his bedpost."
"He knows I want to wait. We haven't gone on three dates yet. Shouldn't gentlemen assume that after the third date?" She turns to Quinn who is standing there, nursing her beer.
"You're asking the wrong girl, Rach." She smiles lightly and Rachel knows she is going back to Puck. The only guy she has ever slept with. There's been no one else and they're both glad for it. "But whether it's the first or 100th date, if you're not ready he should respect that."
"Yeah." Rachel nods softly and raises her glass to her supposedly boyfriend when he looks her way. He shouts her name, and she is a little embarrassed by that.
"I'll get a refill. I am too sober to handle that idiot." Santana pushes herself past them and they're left alone on the corner of that rooftop. The view is spectacular from there and Quinn looks even more beautiful.
"Is he pressuring you, Rach?" Quinn looks over to the guy and the smile is gone. She is serious and there is no softness in her eyes. She is channelling her perfect HBIC look.
"No. We talked about this and he got it. But I don't know if he really did, you know?" She looks at him and then at Quinn. "Maybe Santana is right. He is not the right guy."
"Maybe not." Quinn nods softly. "Do you want me to have a chat with him?"
"It won't be necessary." Rachel sighs and reaches for the girl's hand, lacing their fingers together. "I don't think we'll be seeing much of him after tonight." She tugs the blonde by the hand and walks them towards where Santana was waiting patiently for her drink.
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"You should tell her." Santana leans against the kitchen counter and watches Rachel clean the dishes of the small lunch they had, before Quinn took her train back to Yale.
"What are you talking about?" She loads the dishwasher and wipes her hands clean.
"I don't know. Maybe that you're gay for Fabray?" Santana rolls eyes at her.
"You're insane, Santana. I am not gay." Rachel scoffs at her. "And I am not homophobic or something, I have two gay dads and three of my close friends are gay or bisexual. I like guys."
"I didn't say you are gay. I said gay for Fabray." Santana smirks. "You don't like girls, you just like her and that's enough."
"I don't like her that way." Rachel walks away from Santana. She doesn't like where this is going. "And even if I did, she is seeing that new girl…Laura?"
"Lorelai and it didn't work out." Santana grins when Rachel turns to look at her so fast that she should worry about a whiplash.
"What? When did this happen?" Rachel reaches for the phone in her purse. Had she missed the memo? Why didn't Quinn say anything?
"A couple of days ago. Do you think she really wanted to attend that idiot's party? She was supposed to go back home with her." The Latina leans against the couch. "She needed to take her mind off things, and it was a perfect chance to do that." Santana nods to her phone. "She didn't want me to tell you."
"Why? Was it because of me again?" Rachel scoffs. "I don't get why these girls feel so threatened by me."
"Really? You don't see why?" Santana laughs at her. "I thought you'd get it by now."
"Get what? What do I have to do with her breakups?" Rachel rests her hands on her hips in a familiar pose.
"God, Berry." Santana throws her hands in the air. "Can you honestly tell me that you didn't notice the way she stares at you? The way she talks to you? It's like you hang the moon on the freaking sky." She is shouting and she doesn't know why. "That girl literally screamed your name out when I had my head between her legs, and you can't tell why she keep a girlfriend? It's you that she wants. It's always been you!"
"No. You're lying. Quinn doesn't like me that way." Rachel takes a step back. "You're just messing with me. Is she behind this? Is this a joke? Because it's not funny."
"God, you're such an idiot. You don't deserve her." Santana hits the back of the couch with her fist. "Do you think it's a joke? Call them. Call those girls and ask them what it feels like to be with a girl who wants someone else. Someone who looks at her best friend the way she is supposed to look at you."
"You like her? You like Quinn, don't you?" It dawns on her and it feels like a cold shower in winter. It freezes her.
"It doesn't matter what I like. What do you want, Rachel?" Santana looks away for a short moment. "Do you want to jump from a wrong guy to another just because you're too scared to admit you want her? What are you scared of?"
"It's Quinn. What if we do this and everything goes wrong? What if we break up? I'll lose her forever." Rachel leans against the door.
"But what if everything works for the best? You're standing here, scared of breaking up with a girl that you're not even with." Santana is in front of her and she doesn't even notice when it happened. "What if your fears are getting in the way of the best thing that could happen to you? Are you willing to take that risk because you think it might not work?"
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"Rachel, what are you doing here?" Quinn opens the door of her dorm and she is surprised to see the familiar brunette there. "Don't you have to work at the restaurant today?"
"You broke up with your last two girlfriends because of me." Rachel steps inside the familiar dorm room and leans against the closed door.
"Actually, the last three." Quinn rubs the back of her head. "But with Rebecca, it was right before the second date, so it didn't last that long."
"When did that happen?" Rachel wraps her arms around herself.
"You had that pregnancy scare and I couldn't leave you alone dealing with that, but we had our second date that night and I didn't show up." Quinn rubs the back of her head. "In my defense, I sent her flowers, but she threw them at my face the day after. Good thing I didn't buy something heavier." She chuckles and Rachel feels even dumber.
"And Lorelai? What happened to her?" Rachel shakes her head. "She was nice and after Christine, I thought…she was nice."
"She was, she really was." Quinn nods in agreement.
"But?" Rachel pushes herself off the door and walks up to her.
"You know, don't you?" Quinn takes a step back. "Santana had no right to tell you."
"Tell me what? That I am an idiot?" Rachel chuckles. "She has insulted me before or called me names, but this time she is right."
"So, what? Now, you know and there's nothing we can do about it." Quinn takes another step back and when she hits the bed with the back of her knees, she knows she is screwed. There's nowhere else to go.
"I don't entirely agree with that." She pushes her down and stands there, between Quinn's parted knees.
"You don't have to do this ok? We can pretend this never happened and we go back to how things were. We are friends. You're my best friend." Quinn looks up at her.
"I can't, Quinn." Her hands rest on each side of the girl's neck tilting it backwards. "You're my best friend, but I can't keep denying there's something more here."
"Rachel." Quinn's lips tremble and her eyes fill with uncertainty and fear. The fear of losing her forever.
"I am scared too, Quinn." Rachel leans down to push their foreheads together. "I am scared of losing you and I can't afford that."
"Rachel, I don't want to lose you either." Quinn stands up, but their foreheads stay together. Her arms circle the brunette's waist, holding her close to her.
"But I don't want to lose you to someone else." Rachel's hands cross behind the back of her head. "I don't want to miss my chance to make you happy."
"You mean?" Quinn pushes her forehead against hers.
"Can I kiss you, Quinn?" Rachel doesn't wait for an answer and just leans in to capture her lips with hers.
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"I have wanted to do this for so long." Rachel nuzzles her face into the crook of her neck and presses her lips there, right below her pulse.
"Of all the things we have done in the past hour, you wanted to kiss my neck?" Quinn chuckles and curls her forearm around the back of her head, drawing her closer. She pulls her head back and lowers her face so she can kiss Rachel, on the lips. She does it again and when Rachel moans against her, she uses her hand to grab her by the back of her thigh and roll them over, settling back between her legs.
"I have wanted to kiss you everywhere." Rachel's fingers tangle in her hair. She tugs her by her shorter hair so their lips can barely part. She can feel every inch of Quinn's body against hers, keeping her warm despite their state of underdress.
"Now, that sounds more like it." Quinn grins against her lips. She licks her bottom lip and tugs playfully at it, making the brunette arch up into her.
"You're skipping classes for me, aren't you?" Rachel's forefinger trails down the column of her throat and even lower, tracing the juts of her collarbone.
"Nothing that I can't keep up with on my own." Quinn tries to bite her finger playfully and when Rachel giggles, she steals the melodious sound from her mouth. She slides herself fully on top of her and Rachel hugs her tightly, with her arms and legs.
"Quinn…" Rachel looks up into her eyes, and Quinn has to remember how to breathe. "How long?"
"You want the truth?" Quinn pushes her forehead against the brunette. "Since junior year."
"No, you were after Finn." Rachel tries to slip from under her, but Quinn doesn't let her. She holds her down and she stops trying. "You wanted Finn."
"I wanted Finn so he could stay away from you." Quinn cups her face and nuzzles their noses together. "I loved him once, but nothing I felt for him or Sam ever came closer to what I feel for you."
"And Santana? What about her?" Rachel nuzzles her face against the inside of her elbow.
"It was just sex. It didn't mean anything to me, and she was still pining over Brittany." Quinn kisses her temple, and she has no heart to tell her the truth. It's not up to her.
"And the other girls." Rachel nuzzles her nose along the side of her cheek and down, to her jawline.
"If breaking up with them for you doesn't say enough about my feelings for you, I don't know what could do it." Quinn kisses her temple and shifts on her side, facing her.
"I know." Rachel rolls on her side to face her and brings her arm over her waist, closing the gap between their bodies. "And that scares me a lot."
"I am scared too." Quinn's fingers trail along her ribcage and down to her hip. She touches her so tenderly that she wonders how she has let anyone else touch her before Quinn. It'll never be the same.
"What if…" Rachel looks down between their tangled naked bodies. She doesn't know when Quinn ends and she starts, but what if it doesn't last? What will be left of them?
"If something ever happens, we'll deal with it." Quinn tilts her chin upwards and looks at her. "I won't let the fear of losing you keep me away from having a chance with you. Not now that I know we can have a chance."
"You're right." Rachel cups her face and kisses her softly. "And you do have more than just a chance. You have me, Quinn."
"And you have me." Quinn smiles against her lips and draws her in another soft kiss, before rolling them over to seal the promise in a more spectacular way.
THE END
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