A/N: Thanks to Lizzie and Stacy (bkerbunny) for the reviews. Much appreciated. This chapter continues where the last one left off. Enjoy.
She was slowly edging into her own world, one where she was alone. Unfortunately, her world didn't creep into reality as someone entered the bathroom. Jessie banged her head against the stall door.
"Fuck Raven. He doesn't know me like he thinks he does. He knows nothing! Asshole, trying to take the moral high ground. Fuck him!" Jessie yelled.
The person that had entered the bathroom took in a breath in shock before turning and leaving again. Jessie didn't notice, she was too far into her own world now. A little while later, Jessie was brought back to reality rudely as someone banged on the stall door.
"Jessie, open this fucking door right now." Raven's voice broke through the haze.
"Get lost, birdbrain." Jessie muttered in response.
"Open the door or I'll break it down." Raven commanded. Jessie ignored him.
"Scott, stop. Let me try." A female voice spoke up. Raven must have relented.
"Jessie? My name's Jackie. Can you open the door so we can talk?" Jackie Gayda asked quietly.
Jessie reached up and unlocked the door, shifting slightly so she was sitting against the wall of the stall instead of the door. Jackie opened the door and knelt down so she could look Jessie in the eye. She noticed the glazed over look and resisted the urge to say anything to Raven. He'd walked over to one of the basins anyway.
"Are you okay, sweetie?" Jackie asked calmly.
"Just fucking peachy. I've gone from being controlled by Austin to being controlled by Raven. Everything's just going so fucking well." Jessie spat.
Raven came back over to the two women and pushed past Jackie. He grabbed Jessie by her armpits and hauled her to her feet. Once she was standing, Raven moved her over to the basin he'd been at before and pushed her head down into the water that he'd filled it with. After a few seconds, he lifted her head, pulled her long hair back with one hand and then dunked her again. When he let her up again, she came up fighting.
"Let me go, you bastard! He's trying to drown me! Someone help me!" Jessie screamed as she struggled against Raven.
"Cut it out. If I wanted to drown you, I wouldn't have let you up. Take a breath." Raven warned.
"Don't you dare!" Jessie warned.
Raven pushed her head back into the water, just giving her time to take a breath. He let her up again and let her go. She turned towards him and made to slap him. Raven grabbed her wrist and turned her around so that she was held in his arms. She struggled against him and screamed in frustration when he wouldn't let her go.
"Raven, stop. This isn't helping anyone." Jackie stepped in.
"It's okay, Jacks. Do me a favor and go find Cassidy, will you?" Raven asked calmly. Jackie looked at Jessie and decided there really wasn't anything she could do to help the girl. She nodded at Raven and left the bathroom.
"I left you alone for five seconds and you took the needle and used it. So much for wanting help. You fucking lied to my face and I was stupid enough to believe you. Guess I need to ask Rod to give me lessons in catching your give aways. Then again, I should know by now never to trust an addict." Raven laughed halfheartedly.
"Stop acting like you know me. You know nothing about me." Jessie told him adamantly.
"I know you're on the fast track to killing yourself. I just can't work out why." Raven replied.
"I deserve to die. I killed my baby." Jessie whispered. She stopped fighting and went limp in Raven's arms just as Cassidy came in.
"What's going on?" Cassidy asked. Raven looked down at Jessie and noted that she'd either fallen asleep or passed out.
"She needs detox. We're going to the hotel and locking her in. You're driving." Raven explained quickly.
Cassidy nodded and watched as Raven lifted Jessie's small frame into his arms. Just as they were preparing to leave the bathroom, Roderick walked in, followed by Jackie.
"I'm sorry... he was with Cass when I told him about Jessie. I tried to hold him off." Jackie apologized.
"It's okay, Jacks. Rod, go get Jessie's gear. We're out of here." Raven ordered, shifting Jessie's weight slightly. Roderick noted the fresh bruise on Jessie's arm and shook his head.
"She's not worth the hassle, man. Leave her here. Let the junkie be a junkie." He told them. Raven noted the hollow sound in his voice.
"Rod, she needs help. She needs you." Raven assured him.
"If she needed my help, she'd ask. She always did after Austin beat her. She'd beg me to help her get away, yet she'd stay with him even after I gave her a way out. And now I think I've figured out why." Roderick sighed. Raven looked at him curiously, so Roderick continued.
"He was her dealer. He got her the drugs." Roderick answered the unasked question. Raven looked down at Jessie and nodded.
"You could be right. Only one way to find out." Raven reasoned.
"Nah. I'm done with it. She wants to keep things from me, I'll help her do it. I'm out." Roderick decided as he turned and left the bathroom.
"Fuck. Not good, not good." Raven muttered. He'd been hoping that Roderick would be willing to help them get Jessie through her withdrawal.
"I'll get Jessie's stuff and meet you at the car. We'll figure it out." Cassidy figured. Raven nodded and let Cassidy and Jackie lead the way out of the bathroom.
Once they were at the hotel, Raven asked Jackie if she would attempt to shower Jessie. He wanted to make sure her temperature didn't get too high but figured it would be a little indecent if he showered her. The last thing they all needed was for Jessie to have a bad reaction to whatever had been in the syringe.
Jackie agreed, citing that it couldn't possibly be any harder than getting a drunk WWE Diva into the shower. If it was any other situation, Raven may have asked which Diva Jackie was referring to. As it was, his mind was trying to work out all the different things they'd need in order to get Jessie through the night. Jotting down a list of stuff, he sent Cassidy to the nearest convenience store to get the supplies.
Raven was trying to work out who else he could get to aid him with Jessie's withdrawal when he heard a crash from the bathroom. Jackie came into the room with a towel held to her head.
"What the hell happened?" Raven asked, moving the towel slightly to inspect Jackie's eyebrow and forehead and eyebrow over her left eye.
"Someone decided she didn't like having help in the bathroom. She pushed me away and I lost my footing. Cabinets have sharp corners, did you know?" Jackie tried to joke.
"Keep the pressure on there until it stops bleeding. I'll find some Band-aids or something to put over it." Raven told her.
"Thanks, Scotty. I kind of have this feeling that all the stuff that happened in the ring earlier wasn't scripted. If that feeling proves to be true then I can understand why Jessie's so..." Jackie paused, trying to come up with the right word.
"Messed up?" Raven offered.
"I was going to say sad but I guess your way works too." Jackie sighed.
"Fuck you, Raven! Where the fuck are my clothes?" Jessie yelled from the bathroom.
"Get your butt back in the shower or I'll come in there and make you." Raven called back.
"Hard to do when the door's locked!" Jessie retorted.
"Oh, fuck. Damn stupid doors having locks." Raven mumbled, running a hand over his head.
"Relax. If we're locked out, it means she's locked in. She can't get into any trouble in there." Jackie pointed out.
"Mm... good point. This is going to get a hell of a lot worse before it gets any better. You might as well bail now." Raven told her, moving to open the door for her.
"I'm not going anywhere. You're going to need my help with her again at some point so I'll stay. Saves you groveling to me later." Jackie reasoned.
"You sure? That bump of yours will need looking at." Raven figured.
"So, I'll get it checked and then come back. I'm not leaving until Cass gets back, though." Jackie replied seriously.
"If you have a concussion, don't come back." Raven commanded.
"Aw, you love me. You really love me." Jackie joked. Raven looked at her and shook his head.
"I'm admitting to nothing. Haas may try killing me if I do." He smiled. A small blush rose to Jackie's cheeks, just as Cassidy returned.
"I'm not interrupting anything am... what happened?" Cass asked as he spotted the towel covering part of Jackie's face.
"Jessie pitched a fit, Jackie slipped and hit her head, Jessie's locked herself in the bathroom. Now you're up to speed." Raven summarized.
"She locked herself in? And you're not worried by this?" Cassidy asked as he dropped the shopping bags on the table.
"What harm can she do?" Jackie shrugged.
"My razor's in there." Cassidy explained as he calmly headed for the door of the bathroom. Jackie and Raven shared a worried glance, each wondering when they last heard any noise from the bathroom.
"This day keeps getting more and more interesting." Raven muttered as they followed after Cassidy quickly.
Cassidy banged on the bathroom door and waited for a reply. When he didn't get one, he tried the handle. Finding it locked, just as Raven had told him it would be, he took a few steps back and shoulder-barged the door. As the door burst open, allowing them access to the room, Cassidy regained his balance and rubbed his shoulder.
After glancing around the bathroom, Cassidy spotted Jessie sitting in the shower, her knees pulled up to her chest. She seemed to be in another world, in a trance, much like when he first saw her in the hotel room the previous night. Cassidy knelt down next to her, not caring that he was getting wet... until he realized that the water was ice cold.
"Shit! Someone grab me a towel." Cassidy ordered as he turned the water off. Raven tossed a towel to him, wondering what the problem was.
"She's freezing. Come on, Jess, get up. Time to get warm." Cassidy urged, trying to wrap the towel around her as he pulled her to her feet.
"Here, let me help." Jackie offered as she stepped past Raven.
"Now you want to help? Weren't you meant to be in here watching her?" Cassidy pointed out angrily.
"Cass, calm down. Jessie didn't want..." Raven started, only to be cut off.
"Does it look like she should be allowed to dictate what she wants? She's high. She doesn't know what she wants or needs. You, of all people, should understand that, Scott." Cassidy blurted, his temper overtaking him.
"That's enough!" Raven warned.
"No, I don't think it is. Get out, both of you. Go!" Cassidy ordered sharply.
Raven began to protest but Jackie put her hand on his arm and began pulling him out of the bathroom. Once they were out of earshot of Cassidy, Raven turned on her.
"What the hell was that?" He asked, motioning back towards the bathroom.
"Cassidy is right. I messed up and left her alone in there. No point fighting about it in front of Jessie. Things are bad enough for her as it is. Besides, I think it's kind of sweet." Jackie smiled slightly.
"Sweet? How do you figure that?" Raven asked, caught off guard.
"Cassidy being all protective. He'd make a great boyfriend... maybe even for Jessie, some day." Jackie replied wistfully.
"Are you out of your mind? She's in there, frozen to the bone, in a drug haze after ending an abusive relationship, and you're trying to play matchmaker?" Raven questioned.
"Jessie's safe with Cass, that's all I'm saying." Jackie shrugged.
Raven finally caught on and relaxed a little. A few moments later, Cassidy led Jessie, towel clad, out of the bathroom and through to his bedroom. About twenty minutes after that, Cassidy emerged and stood in front of Raven and Jackie.
"Jackie, I'm sorry I snapped at you. It wasn't your fault that Jessie locked herself in there. Scott, I'm sorry I got angry with you, too. I was completely out of line." Cassidy apologized.
"You're forgiven, Cass. Isn't he, Scotty?" Jackie urged.
"Yeah. How's Jessie?" Raven mumbled.
"She's still shaking but I don't know if that's from the cold or the drugs. I helped her into some warm clothes and she's in my bed, buried in blankets to try and warm her up." Cassidy explained.
"You know what the best way to warm someone up is?" Jessie asked. Raven saw the twinkle in her eye and dreaded the answer.
"What?" Cassidy wondered. Raven slapped his forehead. Cassidy just had to go and ask.
"Share your body heat with them." Jackie grinned. Cassidy stammered, trying to find a suitable reply. This only served to make Jackie laugh.
"So... had she got her hands on your razor? I didn't see any blood in the bathroom but... you never know." Raven asked, thankfully changing the subject.
"No cuts. But the razor wasn't where I left it." Cassidy replied, letting the implication behind the words hang in the air. Raven's cellphone started ringing and cut off any further conversation. He checked the caller id and sighed audibly before answering the call.
"Hey, Rod, what's up?" He wondered. Cassidy motioned to Raven that he wished to speak to Roderick after hearing his name.
"I was just wondering if... I mean, I was wondering how... you know what, just forget it." Roderick stumbled over his words.
"Rod, wait. Cassidy wants to talk to you." Raven told the younger man before handing the phone to Cassidy.
"Rods, I just thought you might like to know that Jessie's been muttering apologies to you for the last twenty minutes or so. From the sound of it, I'd say she's pretty genuine." Cassidy informed him.
"It's too late for apologies. Look at what she's done to herself... it never would have come to this if she'd just let me help her. I just don't understand why, or how, she'd do something like this... it isn't her." Roderick explained.
"Of course it isn't her. It's Austin. Now that she's away from him, things will get better. But she needs you to be part of this, man. She needs you to be there for her." Cassidy urged. Roderick sighed.
"I know. I just don't know what to say to her that I haven't already said. Not like it'll matter what anyone says, anyway. She's stubborn as hell and will end up doing things her own way no matter what. If she wants to keep doing drugs, that's what she's going to do." Roderick reasoned.
"Then we have to get her to realize what she'd lose if she did keep doing the drugs – her friends, her job... her life. She needs to see that we're just trying to help her." Cassidy figured.
"How do we show her all that, though?" Roderick asked, hoping that Cassidy had some kind of idea.
"Well, we start by getting you over here to talk to her and then see what happens next." Cassidy decided. Roderick laughed slightly.
"You haven't got a clue, have you?" He queried.
"Of course I do. Now I just need to collect the other clues and I'll have a set. Get your butt over here and talk to your best friend." Cassidy tried to lighten the mood slightly.
"Since when did you become Raven? Isn't he the one that usually gives orders like that?" Rod wondered.
"Fine, if you want to hear it from him, here." Cassidy stated before passing the phone back to Raven.
"Tell him to get over here." Cassidy whispered. Raven nodded and turned his attention to Roderick.
"Get over here. Jessie needs you and... so do the rest of us." Raven admitted. Jackie nodded in agreement.
"Alright. I'm on my way." Roderick finally gave in. Raven ended the call and nodded at Cassidy.
"He's on his way. Do you really think she's coherent enough to talk to him?" He wondered.
"Maybe not quite but I have a feeling that him being here will bring her out of this faster." Cassidy replied honestly.
Raven had to agree, remembering the way she'd reacted to having Roderick there the previous night. A few minutes later, there was a knock at the hotel door. Cassidy ran over and opened it and let Roderick into the room. Roderick took one look at Jackie and paled slightly.
"What happened to you? Jessie didn't hit you, did she?" He asked quietly.
"I slipped in the bathroom and banged my head. Nothing major." Jackie covered. Roderick relaxed a little and looked around.
"I thought she would've trashed this place by now." He mused.
"We hogtied her and left her in the boot of Raven's car." Jackie stated with a straight face. If Roderick had been pale before, he looked absolutely transparent now.
"I'm kidding. God, you think we'd actually do that to someone?" Jackie clarified quickly.
"I would've. At least until she comes down off whatever it is that she's taken." Roderick whispered. Cassidy decided to break up the current line of conversation.
"She's in my room. I think you should go in and hear what it is that she's been saying for yourself." Cassidy told Roderick.
He nodded and wandered slowly towards the bedroom. He tapped on the door and opened it slowly, only to see Jessie sitting up in the middle of Cassidy's bed, her legs pulled up to her chest and her head resting on her knees.
"Jessie?" Roderick whispered into the quiet room. Jessie looked up briefly but then let her head rest on her knees.
"Tell them to let me out, Rods, please. I feel trapped in here." Jessie pleaded.
"The door to the bedroom isn't locked. You could've walked out." Roderick pointed out.
"Why won't they let me go?" Jessie asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
"Because they care. I shouldn't be here." Roderick decided before turning back towards the door.
"I'm sorry, Rods." Jessie told him, her voice barely loud enough for him to hear.
"Sorry for what? Doing drugs or getting caught? Or maybe for not telling me that you were pregnant, or that you'd lost the baby because of the drugs that you took to kill the pain Austin put you through. Or maybe for going back to that asshole after he hit you the first time. What exactly is it that you're sorry for?" Roderick blurted out, angered by how calm she seemed to be. Everyone else was on edge but Jessie was as calm as could be.
"All of it. I'm sorry for all of it. You have no idea!" Jessie yelled, Roderick's anger becoming contagious.
"You're right, I don't. And you know why that is? Because you never told me, Jess. You let me think you had everything under control. Why? Why didn't you tell me?" Roderick wanted to know.
"Because I didn't want to see the disappointment in your eyes. I didn't want you to pity me, or think I was weak. I tried to be strong because I didn't want to lose you and Lacey. You two were the only reason I kept living and I couldn't show you how broken I was because I was scared you'd turn away." Jessie ranted, barely managing to form cohesive sentences.
"So instead of turning to us, the people that love you, you turned to drugs. Hell of a choice there, Jess. Really. Junkies are weak... they don't have the strength to stay away from the drugs. I'm not disappointed in you. I'm disgusted. It makes me sick to think of all the times I took you to the emergency room after Austin beat you. I could never work out why you went back to him but I know now. He got you the drugs, didn't he?" Roderick accused.
"Fuck off and leave me alone." Jessie replied. She was trying to work out if the pounding in her ears was from her heart or someone banging on the door.
"Fine. I'm gone. I hope you wake up alone one day and wonder what happened to all the people that used to care about you. And I hope you hear my voice in your head telling you that you brought it on yourself." Roderick told her before walking out of the bedroom and slamming the door behind him.
A/N2: Things just seem to keep getting worse for Jessie, don't they? Never fear, there's more to come yet. Another three chapters, to be exact (thanksagain Lizzie. I should learn to write in chapters some day). Anyways, please leave a review to let me know what you think. Constructive criticism is accepted. Thank you for reading.
Phoenix