Tears
Fai was hopelessly obsessed. There was something about the ninja. He couldn't stop harassing the ninja. The more he irritated him, the more likely he would leave him alone at night. And if he was left alone at night, he would be able to cry. He would be bale to mourn the life he left behind, mourn the future that threatened him with every step he took forward. He was running and the ninja hated it.
He was a coward and Kurogane hated cowards most of all. It hurt to think that Kurogane hated him. That he was just an annoyance to the overtly handsome ninja, but he couldn't change. He was running. And to stop would mean death.
So it was that late at night, when nothing else moved that Fai was softly crying in the bed. For some reason, Kurogane had opted to sleep in the floor, rather than beside the wizard, hurting his heart far more deeply than it should have. And as he lay, silently weeping, he could hear Kurogane's calm breathes as he slept.
He was practiced at the art of silent tears. He'd never share his heart break, his tears, with anyone. He was secretive. Far more so than anyone he knew. Far more than the ninja suspected. But that didn't mean he didn't' hurt occasionally. He wanted. He hurt. He mourned. He never really rejoiced. He celebrated with the travelers and pretended he was as happy as everyone else. He didn't feel it. He didn't particularly enjoy it, but to avoid all questions about himself, he played happy.
But all he wanted was for Kurogane to wrap his arms around him, hold him as a lover and keep him safe. It would never happen though. He would never hold him the way he wanted to be held. Kurogane was a man of action, he wasn't a man of gentle touches and he wasn't about to give into the whims of a silly of a wizard who missed his homes. Who missed his man, his lover. His abuse.
And so he cried at night. Silently, without making any movements, without making any movements, without making any sounds. He was practiced at the art of secret tears. On his back, he let the tears fall from his eyes and onto the pillow behind him. The dark ceiling danced in blurry acknowledgement of his tears as he mourned, his body longing for the warmth of another's body. World hopping was a wearying adventure into time. He wanted the closeness one got when one was laying with another.
"Hey wizard," Kurogane's rough voice rose in the quiet dark.
"What is it, Kuro-chan? I thought you were sleeping," Fai smiled, his voice dancing with joy.
"Shut up. I hear you crying. What's wrong with you?" Kurogane asked angrily.
"I'm not crying! What would I have to cry about?" Fai asked.
"You tell me. What are you crying for?"
"I'm not crying Kuro-chan. I never cry," Fai answered quickly, smiling.
Kurogane's form rose above him, towering in the night. "I hate liars," Kurogane grumbled, wiping his hand across Fai's cheek. "You are crying, that's why you're cheeks are wet. What's bothering you?"
"Oh Kuro-chan, you're such a softie. You're worrying about me!" Fai teased.
"Shut up Fai. Tell me why you cry. Tell me why you don't sleep at night? Tell me why you cry all the time?"
"I'm not going to reveal my secrets," Fai smiled. "You are welcome to try to stop the tears if you want."
"How would I stop them?"
"You just have to stay with me. That's all I ask of you. Will you stay with me tonight?" Fai asked softly.
"I'm here aren't I?" Kurogane grumbled.
"Stay in the bed with me. I… I want…" Fai broke off quietly, a faint blush coloring his cheeks as he looked away from the towering form.
"What do want?"
"I want… I want you to hold me, please?" Fai asked, his voice near pleading.
Kurogane didn't say anything. He slipped into the bed and put his arms around Fai's thin body. The wizard snuggled against the ninja.
"You can cry if you want to. I won't stop you," Kurogane muttered.
Fai nodded and tightened his grip on Kurogane. The only sound was their breathing. "Thank you Kurogane," Fai whispered, holding tightly to the ninja.
When the sun rose, neither would mention it and neither would forget. As darkness fell again, they would lay together, sharing in the secrets they alone held.
Dedicated to my friend Tainted Desires for helping me when I needed it the most. For holding my hand when I was lost. And for being my friend when I needed it.