Disclaimer:
Naruto is the creative property of Masashi Kishimoto, who created this wonderful anime/manga series. Anything not attributed to Kishimoto-san belongs to their respective owners, such as references to Cowboy Bebop (the Swordfish II) that is a creation of Sunrise and Shinichiro Watanabe, BLEACH is a creation of Kubo Tite, and vice-versa. This story is written purely just for fun, guys; please for God's sake, don't sue me! I'm just a college student with too much free time on his hands! On the other hand, any specific author created characters I created for this fic (despite how unoriginal they may be at times) are mine. So without further adieu, let's get on with the show!
The Surgeon General's Warning:
Read at your own risk. Multiple pairings inside folks, with UraharaxYoruichi (maybe a Soi FongxUraharaxYoruichi three way?) to name one, but I ain't gonna give away who will be the gal who gets Naruto's heart just yet! w00t, for Fem-Haku! You never know what you're going to get so read on (I might even do some alternative stuff, if you know what I mean).
How to be a Mr. Nice Guy
Ore no Nindo / My Way of the Ninja is...
Chapter 06:
My Name?
A Naruto-BLEACH fanfic by James "Ray" Edwards
Her dark haggard eyes widened in bewildered astonishment at the blonde-haired boy, his bright hair like the rays of the sun, and the blonde-haired man, his pale hair like straw swaying in the fields. With a joyful laugh, the boy, Naruto, exploded , tackling the man in an embrace that sent him squarely on his back. He sang praises all the while nuzzling the man, Kisuke, unmercifully while the older man protested loudly, saying this was a "FATALY UNMANLY" thing to be doing in front of a girl.
She could not understand it. Why were they so happy? Why were they taking her with them? Why were they so happy to take her with them? Why did he save her? Why did this man accept her finally? Why? Why? Why?
None of it made any sense. How could they all have the same eyes? How could they even be remotely alike? It was impossible, unbelievable. She was a monster. She had killed so many...
Mother.
Father.
It was all my fault, so why? Why are they so happy? Did they want to use me? Did they want to do terrible things to me too? Why? Why? Why?
Suddenly, the world came rushing back to her. Warm; the small lightly calloused hands gently clasping her own filthy hands, stained with the blood of those she had killed. Even though he was a boy, his hands were smaller than hers, and yet, something so small was so --- warm. She could feel it piercing through the cold, her body sat inert as her dark eyes began to moisten and tremble, staring into his wide blue eyes.
"See! See! I knew everything would work out, Onee-chan," Naruto chirped excitedly with a toothy smile. "He might not look that reliable, but..."
"Hey! I'm right here, you know!" the eternal unshaven man snapped in reply.
"...but when it counts, Geta-Boushi is the MAN!"
"Hora, enough with the praises already, Naruto-kun." As much as I like to hear them, we don't have much time to lolly gagging around right now.
"Okay, okay, if you say so," the boy grinned back before turning his attention back on the mysterious girl. "All right, so what's your --- name, Onee-chan?"
Naruto was sweating bullets, his back stiffening, as he finally realized what was happening right in front of him. The girl: she was crying, and there was this overwhelming, black-and-blue sadness just coming off her. He did not know what to do or what to say. Kisuke had never prepared him for a situation like this, and he had the distinctive sinking feeling that the son of a gun had just left him alone to deal with it too. Blast it; he was going to have to play this on his guts.
"Oi, what's wrong? Why are you crying, Nee-chan?" he asked her, making no effort to let go of her hands. Instead, the hyperactive blonde-haired genius did the exact opposite and shifted closer, so that their noses were just centimeters apart. He really hoped this little awkwardness was not going to get him killed.
She gasped, visibly stricken with the seemingly absurd act that he would even dare approach her. Her heart raced and her mind raged with basic instinct, fight or flight, and for the first time in a long time, she felt fear, but this was different too. It was hot, blinding white-hot, setting her veins, her entire body on fire. She had to get away from this boy. She could not fight him. He was weird, crazy, anything! She had to get away from him!
However, before she could flee, the blonde-haired boy must have sensed her distress as he moved in...
The nameless girl screamed at the top of her lungs, a terrible terrifying wail!
...and embraced her, and he was not going to let go.
Naruto winced at the piercing pitch of the girl's screams. She was not physically struggling against him, but she sure as heck could scream! He hoped he was not going to go deaf from this, and their real first day together had not even started yet. They still needed to give her a bath, pick out new clothes for her, get her a hair cut, get new gear together for her, start her training, and do all these other things, though not necessarily all of what he just mentioned in that order. Of course, the bath would definitely have to come first.
Steeling his resolve, he weathered her screams as best as he could, never letting go of her for a second. It would be awkward if the other present customers in the inn or the inn's staff came barging through the door, but even then he was not going to let go. This was his big sister for Pete's sake, and they were going to get through this together whether she liked or not!
After a while, her screams began to recede, the sudden strength in her voice degenerating into pitiful broken sobs. His ears were not being assaulted anymore, but Naruto felt just like a jerk, with a ringing headache too. Again, he cursed Kisuke for ditching him, but the best thing to do in this situation he supposed, was to go with his gut instincts. If they got him here, then could certainly get him out of this mess too.
"Oi, Nee-chan, what's wrong?" Naruto asked her. He winced a little when he felt the "hot" tears soak into his shoulder, stinging oddly enough like freezing cold ice. The energetic blonde-haired genius dared not look, but he had a sinking feeling that the girl's tears were freezing the moment they came in contact with him.
Her reply was stilted, a husky whisper that he just managed to decipher, "Wh-Why? ...What do you want --- from me? Eyes. Those eyes aren't..."
"They are."
"No."
"We're all broken inside. Me. Kisuke. You. We're the same."
"No..."
He hugged her a little closer. "There; can you feel that?"
"I --- I can't feel --- anything."
"You're lying, you know. People who really can't feel anything at all don't cry because they don't want it means to cry. You --- I know you can hear the beat of my heart, Nee-chan."
"...warm..."
"You don't have to tell me or Geta-Boushi what happened. It's been almost five years now --- well, it will be soon enough, I guess --- and he still knows more about me than I do. He always says I'm too young, maybe next year."
"Too young?" she replied, a sliver of life seeping into her soft voice.
"My past, of course. Where I was born, who my parents are, what was my hometown like, why don't I live there now, do I have any siblings... All that stuff and more. I don't know, but I know Geta-Boushi knows, and he's holding back on me, just like he's holding back on his past too."
"'Sandal Hat'? Your past? His past?"
"Yup, we do look like we're really close, but even we have secrets. Things we don't know about each other."
"...secrets..."
"But it's okay, Nee-chan. You don't need to tell us what happened right away, the same goes for Geta-Boushi too. Truth is, I can wait forever if I have to as long as I can be with you both. Not everybody can talk about what really hurts, but that's all right too because thanks to you two, I don't have anymore secrets!"
She blinked. "What?"
"That's right, I just told you both my biggest secret! And other than what Geta-Boushi has left with him, that's all I have! Isn't that great?" He laughed happily, holding her just a little closer. "It's painful to be alone, to be forgotten, to have no home --- you know...that's my secret."
"...pain," the girl murmured, softer than a whisper carried by the wind.
It was then Naruto noticed a peculiar change in the air. Glancing behind him through the open doors to the balcony, he saw white. A veil of snow was falling, drifting and swirling through the air like the waves on the sea. Of course, he had never actually seen the ocean, but Kisuke had told him about it many times, and had promised to take him to see the ocean some day soon when the thought struck him that his protégé had never seen the ocean. Then the man became disturbingly giddy, literally dancing across the road in a freakish waltz, as he raved about the beach, the white sands, the clear blue sky like a reflection of the sea, and the tanned, beautiful scantily clad women in bikinis!
I have no idea what he's talking about, but it probably has something to do with the Icha Icha Paradise book he likes so much, the blonde-haired convenience agent pondered thoughtfully, before his expression dropped visibly with a frown. Then again, maybe Geta-Boushi's just talking about an adult thing-!
Naruto froze, his thoughts derailing like a screaming train. It was interesting invention he saw once when Kisuke and he had been traveling far, far away in the West. He could not remember what it was exactly since he was only two something years old, but it sure steamed, puffed, and made a whole lot of noise. It was magnificent!
He had never seen a train wreck either, but he supposed this was the perfect metaphor for his present situation.
Well...
...actually, it was kind of nice, although seriously unexpected.
For the first time ever, this girl --- no --- his new big sister was hugging him! It was unbelievable; this electric feeling of joy and happiness. She had accepted him, and maybe even in time, she would accept Kisuke too. It was unbelievable, absolutely unbelievable. His heart was filling to the brim, like it was going to ignite.
"Eureka!" Naruto cried happily. He nuzzled his cheek affectionately against her, earning a gasp of surprise for his own efforts, as he held her close.
"N-Naruto!"
"Hora, I'm your little brother now! At least you should give me a cute nickname like 'Naruto-kun', 'Naru-kun,' or 'Naruto-chan'... I did NOT just say 'Naruto-chan', did I?"
"Na-ru-to-chan?"
Naruto sighed, his face falling with expressed defeat. "Fine, you can call me that too... WAIT, I mean! You can call me that if you want, but I'm still not letting Geta-Boushi say it! It's not the sort of thing another man should be saying to another man, unless they're asking for --- Taser-chan, kukukukuku --- where it HURTS."
"All...right, Naru-to-chan..." she agreed hesitantly, still unused to apparently using her own voice.
"So what's your name, Onee-chan?"
Silence.
She sighed, almost seemingly melting into his embrace against him, as the snow outside began to blizzard with a howl. Naruto did not know how to explain it, even with the help of his superb analytical prowess as Kisuke oft praised, although it was nowhere near the guile of Urahara Shop's owner. His simple suspicion was backed only by gut instinct, and he had the distinctive feeling that his new big sister was responsible: the freezing tears, the way she must have dispatched the Mist hunter nin, and vice-versa.
It made him understand another reason they might have been pursuing her. She was powerful, and if the Hidden Village of the Mist could not use her because of their literal views, then they would most certainly not allow her to fall into anyone else's hands. Cruel, efficient: he could only wonder what had happened to her family.
"I --- I can't remember, anymore," the older girl whispered to him tiredly. "I don't want to --- remember. That's why --- I don't have a name. Monster, abom-in-nation, devil, demon; that's all I know..."
Naruto frowned, hugging her protectively, "Well, I'm NOT going to call my Onee-chan any of that! Never. EVER."
"...Na-ru...to..."
"And since you don't have a name, I guess I'll just have to give you a new one, won't I?"
"Unn..."
"Let's see, how about..." the blonde-haired boy drifted off thoughtfully, glancing between the white scene outside and the dark-haired girl he now called his big sister. He racked his creative dynamo for the words he wanted, the inspiration already set in front of him. Yes, if only he could get the words...
haku for white.
yuki for snow.
hime for princess.
Ah, this will do just nicely!
"I got it! How about Yukihime Haku?" Naruto suggested to her with great enthusiasm, pulling away enough just so he could read his big sister's expression.
"Yuki-hime...Haku..." the dark-haired girl repeated reluctantly.
"Yeah, like Snow White?"
"'Snow White'?"
"Uh, sorry, I meant Shirayukihime. You know the story, don't you? If you don't I could certainly tell the western version of the story at least. I did hear the story first in the West and then came back here and heard about Shirayukihime."
"But...I'm not a-"
"Hey, you can say you're not one, but you're every bit worth it to me, Nee-chan! Even Kisuke would feel the same once he gets to know you, or heck, maybe he already does."
"...really, Na-ru-to-chan?"
"Heh-hehe, of course! And I'm sure with a bath, some new clothes, and a fashion makeover, you'll put all the other girls to shame. I can tell, and even Geta-Boushi says I have an eye for it. Haku-neechan, you're going to be the most beautiful princess --- shoot, scratch that --- the most beautiful woman ever!"
For the first time ever, Naruto saw "Haku" smile. It was a small one, just the faintest upturn of the corners of her chapped lips, but it was still a smile, and nothing could compare to the gratitude and ardor he saw in her eyes. The dark haze in them had lifted. No longer was she an animal, prey and predator rolled into one, as the irises of her dark eyes regained a glimmer of dark blue. It was a small step but a big one too.
Watching carefully from the slightly cracked open closet, Kisuke could not help but smile himself as his newest charge all but tackled her new little brother to the floor, nuzzling him near to death with affection. It was the biggest sign of approval she could have given, and in a way, he grew more impressed with the incomprehensible compassion vested in his surrogate son. To be able to tame the beast in another's heart, and to call back the human being that lay slumbering deep beneath the many folds of oblivion and despair was no easy feat.
Naruto, of course, was busy yelping and squealing in an effort to save himself from being lovingly smothered to death.
"'Yukihime Haku,' huh? It's a good name, Naruto," Kisuke nodded approvingly, "A good name, indeed."
Now, if only he could figure out a way to channel that empathy into "MAD Casanova Gigolo Powers," then his protégé (and in effect himself) would surpass the greatness of Icha Icha Paradise!
To be continued...
Author's Notes:
Here it is; here it is! Chapter 6 is here! Feel the power of WAFFyness! Looks, like we got a new member to the family, folks, and the investment prospects are looking brighter for Urahara Shoten. The world lays at large, but could all this cheeriness be the calm before the storm? Do I hear a buzzing bumble bee and a "BWO-HAHAHAHAHAH!" around the corner? More cats?
Thoughts! Reviews! Whatever, maybe we'll find out on the next episode of Mr. Nice Guy!
Thank you all for tuning in and leaving your thoughts for moi. Remember, I always encourage each and everyone of you to feel free to comment, review, and/or discuss the story. Your comments can really make a difference, I assure you, and if you're up to it, feel free to ring me up on AIM, or even send me an e-mail (although you really don't need to boost my ego too often). You know how to get in touch with the maestro here.
Tsudzuku!