Author note: I am currently trying to get a hold of some of my old beta's, (and actually find their information) and speak with some people who have emailed me lately interested in beta'ing, so this chapter is completely unbeta'd, if this is a problem, don't read it. I'm beginning to think that the most I will be doing is a basic 'beta' of my stuff before publishing anyway, that way it can get out and I can think ahead instead of trying to decide what to do. I have more that I'll publish soon, so review and let me know what you think so I can work out any changes I'll be needing.

Chapter 04

• Impardonnable •

When Harry woke in the morning he reviewed the happenings of last night. He recalled the door slamming as Jamie stomped out angrily, and he sighed. He sat up in bed, and the door burst open, a positively gleeful Gabrielle bouncing off the walls. "Good morning!" she said happily. "I made you breakfast."

Harry groaned. Winky was not going to be happy. Usually he took his breakfast late, so she didn't start on it until he was awake. He glanced at his alarm clock and realized it was barely 5 in the morning.

"You're awful chipper, seeing as it's barely five. Did you find a place already?" he asked, a little disgruntled at how early he was being bothered. He rarely even woke at this hour, and he wondered why he had.

"It's not this early in France!" she said, "I flew over here yesterday; I will adjust, but I have not yet."

"Makes things so much easier," he said, and turned to fall back asleep. He really didn't care what was for breakfast, he would much rather have another half-hour of sleep.

"Oh Harry, you're so broody. Get up, or I'll dose you with water."

"Can't use magic here," Harry said groggily.

Magic wasn't necessary. In fact, after what seemed like a second time he was dosed with ice-cold water. He jerked awake, and saw Gabrielle had a glass in her hand. "Out!" he roared, and struggled to free himself from his sheets, ready to curse her until she couldn't even breathe.

Gabrielle scampered off, laughing lightly.

By the time Harry had finished his morning ritual and made it out of his bedroom his food was cold. Winky offered him something, but it was quite obvious that Gabrielle was intent on seeing Harry eat something she'd made. Harry stirred the hash browns a little with his fork before finally breaking down and taking a bite. To his shock, they didn't even taste like hash browns, or potatoes, or anything remotely edible. He managed to choke down the first bite, and he looked at Gabrielle, who was watching curiously, waiting for some sort of reaction.

"What are these?" he asked quietly. He tried to void himself of any emotion because he didn't want to hurt her feelings. She was at least making some sort of real effort, not like most of the girls that threw themselves at his feet, and even if he didn't want her in his life he knew he should be courteous until she pushed things too much.

"Potatoes."

"Where did you get them?" Harry asked, curious how she'd found the potatoes, she didn't seem dirty, and Winky always pulled them fresh from the garden. He was almost positive Winky wouldn't have pulled them if she knew what Gabrielle was going to do with them. Taking over her job was something Harry rarely ever tried, and he always got a severe scolding for it. One thing about a retraining a house-elf, they knew how to talk back should they chose to.

"I couldn't find any in the kitchen, so I checked the small kitchen downstairs, where Winky works. I found a small stash of them downstairs. I just diced them up and..."

Winky, who had been hiding until that moment, let out a gasp and disappeared with a pop. Harry glanced to Gabrielle and frowned. "You didn't take anything else of Winky's, did you?" he asked.

"No," Gabrielle said tentatively, a little frightened suddenly. "I didn't do something wrong, did I?"

"They weren't potatoes," Harry said, wondering how quick he was going to have to throw up. He downed a glass of orange juice, which tasted perfectly alright, and hoped it wouldn't happen. In his whole time working at the school, he'd never once taken ill. He had missed a few classes here and there, but usually the class was pretty good behaved and he could leave his aid in control of the class while he popped to wherever it was he needed to go to take care of personal business.

Winky screamed down stairs and Harry covered his ears as a nauseous feeling overwhelmed him. Harry gripped the table, trying to remain in control, but his stomach wouldn't let him keep it down and he gagged. Then, as he rushed towards the bathroom his whole body went limp and it felt like his food was crawling back up from his stomach. He never made it to the bathroom, and he threw-up all over the floor in the kitchen.

"Harry," an angelic voice sang in his sleep Harry heard it, but couldn't seem to open his eyes to see what angel spoke to him.

There was another voice from time to time, which spoke to him, but none of them were so sweet as the angel.

When he finally woke, he found himself alone, in his bed, and unable to recall why he was there. The sun was barely over the hills, but it was in the wrong spot, and Harry knew he could not have possibly slept all day. He recalled someone else was around, but he couldn't pinpoint who it was. Carefully he sat up and found himself feeling a bit ill. He stepped to his door and pushed it open, only to be assaulted by a powerful feeling that nearly overwhelmed him. Rocking on the spot and glancing around, his eyes came to rest on a sleeping figure sitting in a chair beside his door. He stared at her for a moment before it dawned on him who it was and he gaped.

"She is very sorry," Winky said behind him and Harry turned.

"What is she..." and then, as if the floodgates had been opened, the memories returned to him. He swayed once more by the sheer force of them, and Winky zipped forward to steady him.

"She did not know that the potatoes are Winky's dried gnomes sir. She was thinking they is potatoes and not knowing they is poisonous when they is dried."

Harry looked to Winky, who was nearly holding him up completely and he smiled, thinking about how odd the situation was. "Why do you have dried gnomes Winky?" he asked lightly. "They're not exactly part of any sort of meal I've ever taken."

"The gnomes is good for sickness, they is helping to keep illness away when it comes. Winky mixes tiny bits of skin into the tea once every week, and no one is getting ill at all."

Never having been very good at potions, Harry just shook his head. It seemed to lighten until he found himself floating upward and falling down at the same time. Winky caught him again and carried him back into his room. "You is needing sleep sir," she said in a bossy tone. Harry just nodded and laid back down, though he didn't go to sleep. The sun set and Harry still couldn't fall asleep, though he wasn't quite awake either. He heard his bedroom door open softly, and then close even softer. Someone padded across the floor and stood next to him. He sure it wasn't Winky because she was quieter, and so he guesses it was Gabrielle.

"I am sorry," she whispered, her French accent much stronger than most of the time she spoke in Harry's presence. "I was just wanting to make you happy I had come. You did not want me, and I was confused, and scared. I want you to really know me Harry Potter, I want you to see me as a person, not a Veela."

Harry didn't open his eyes, but he became more aware the she was so close her breath was causing his face to heat up a bit. She moved even closer and with a gentle kiss, he felt her pull away and leave the room.

It was early in the morning, much earlier than normal when Harry got out of bed. He was feeling much more refreshed and he moved across the house, easily getting his morning tasks done. By the time he saw down in the kitchen, a steamy plate of eggs was waiting for him.

"Winky?" Harry asked as the little elf served him some bacon. "When did Gabrielle get to sleep?"

"The miss is sleeping very little last night," she replied, adding more bacon. "She is sleeping much of yesterday. Winky is thinking that she is running out of magic."

"Why would she run out of magic?" Harry asked, just before putting the eggs in his mouth.

"You is taking ill for many days," Winky explained. "The Miss is not sleeping while you is ill. She is trying what she can to help and Winky is thinking that none of it is working well, except to make the Miss lose magic. If she is not sleeping she is not getting rest to replenish it, and since Miss is not having much magic, she is wearing out very fast."

"What day is it Winky?" Harry asked, hoping it hadn't been too long.

"The day is Wednesday sir."

Harry flinched. "I slept for five days?" he asked quietly. "How could you let me do that?" he asked. "I can't just go to sleep while I'm supposed to be working."

"This is being taken care of by the Miss sir, she is taking a note in for Winky sir."

Harry just closed his eyes and silently groaned. Jamie was going to castrate him now, and that would be if she played nice. Glancing at the clock on the wall a second time, Harry sighed. "I'll be going to work early today Winky. Please remind Gabrielle, when she awakens, that she promised to look for another place to live."

"Yes Harry," Winky said, bowing just slightly and disappearing. Harry hoped that it would get his point across, he really didn't like being angry with anyone and, as annoyed as he was with Gabrielle, he wasn't angry, not yet. When she'd first shown up he's tried to get angry, and he had been quite irate, but not enough he supposed.

After changing he left his house and took the long route to work. He usually walked, because it helped him clear his mind in preparations for the day ahead of him. It was also good exercise.

When Harry entered into the school he said hello, then stopped by the office to let them know he was indeed there. Jamie had not come yet, as it was still early in the day, which Harry was quite grateful for. He then went directly to his room. The substitute had followed his lesson plan exactly, and his assistant had left sufficient notes about everything that had been done. Glad that he had a competent assistant, Harry scanned through all the notes and then moved to the ungraded tests locked in his desk. He was grading these when the first person showed up in his room.

He glanced up and nodded to Haley, one of his more enthusiastic students, then returned to his tests.

"Mr. Black?" Harry glanced up, hearing his name. Typically Haley stayed quiet even during class.

"Yes Ms. Hanson?"

Haley frowned. "You can call me Haley."

"And you may call me Harry, we have addressed this before, several times if I'm correct."

"But..."

"Ms. Hanson, what is it that you need?" Harry asked.

"Were you really ill for almost a week?" she asked. "There have been really strange rumors going around the school about you."

"Really?" Harry asked, quite surprised. He even stopped grading and put his papers down. "What sort of rumors have been going around about me?"

"Everyone says that the some model showed up at the school the other day and she knows you. They say that's why you were gone, because she showed up."

Harry almost laughed, the absurdity of it was that it was true, though probably not for the reasons that the teenagers were thinking of. "Ms. Bontecou is indeed a friend of mine, yes. However, I assure you, I was quite ill for the past week. In fact, I was so ill I remember very little of what happened."

"So Ms. Bontecou is really a model too?"

"Too?" Harry asked. "You know her then?"

"Of course, everyone seems to know her now that she is the new office secretary. Ms. Dax doesn't seem to like her, but everyone else does."

Harry sat quietly, digesting the information. If Gabrielle was the office secretary... "Merlin," he muttered under his breath. "This is going to get bad. Ms. Hanson, if you'll excuse me. I won't be long."

As quickly as possible, without seeming in a rush, Harry headed to the office. Several of the students waved hello and he smiled and waved in return, but kept going forward. He couldn't stop and talk to anyone, even if they wanted to. He entered the office and stopped when he was returned with a beautiful smile from Gabrielle.

"Merlin," he whispered again, covering his eyes with his hands. Then he turned and left the office before she could say anything to him.

Class went slower than it had ever gone before. In fact, Harry almost checked for magic before the day was up. When his last class was ended and he'd answered all the questions that came from the students, Harry sat at his desk and waited. His assistant smiled from the back of the room. "You certainly have become the talk of the school," he said cheerfully. "I've been hearing things about you being in hiding from the mafia, or being some great spy or something. There's also the rumor that the new office girl is your wife, the mother of your children, or a long-lost sister. There are more of course, but those are the one's that are most talked about that no one will bring up."

There wasn't much he could do, Harry just shook his head. "I get sick for a week and all the sudden the school decides that I'm some sort of mysterious figure."

"No, you were mysterious before," the assistant said with a smile. "But there was never anything specifically to talk about. Some of the teachers are beginning to wonder about you as well, they talk about how you have no friends other than the one's you've made in the last few years, and no family, no past at all that they know of. It certainly isn't boding well for you."

"I left what life I had, my family died, then my friends died, there was nothing left for me."

"I have heard it before."

"It is true for the most part," Jamie said from the doorway. "He is quite mysterious even if he pretends not to be."

The assistant smiled, stood, and excused himself. He had grown quite used to Jamie showing up after school, and knew it was time to leave.

"Gabrielle has been quite a hit in the office," she said sharply. "So popular that detentions have gone up eighteen percent in the past several days. She does nothing wrong specifically, but she seems quite flirty with the students."

"When did she get a job here?" Harry asked. "I wasn't aware we even had any openings."

"Nor was I," Jamie returned. "Apparently one of the office staff had been thinking about transferring to another school, a job came up, he transferred and there was an opening. It is odd that Gabrielle was available to fill it so quickly. Usually it takes several weeks for someone in the district office to find a replacement when we loose a staff member."

"Has she caused problems?" Harry asked. "I'll tell her she needs to leave if she has been."

"There is nothing she has specifically done yet, however I believe she is causing a problem even if there is nothing I can prove."

Harry let out a breath. "Alright, I'll talk to her anyway. She really needs to find a place to live."

"Were you really ill?" Jamie asked, changing the subject slightly. "Winky would not allow me in at all, she seemed to think I would get ill as well."

"Yes, I was quite ill. In fact, I remember only a few brief moments of what happened after I blacked out. Until last night I was in comatose state."

"Then it was bad?"

"It may very well have killed me from what I understand," Harry said. "Had Winky not been a good nurse I don't think I would have lived."

"Nurse, housekeeper, secretary, cook, is there anything that Winky does not do?"

"She can't drive," Harry pointed out.

Jamie sighed. "You know, every time I go there she seems to be around every corner. You say she's only your maid, but she really doesn't seem to like me at all."

"She doesn't," Harry explained simply. "But she has no say in it, so what she thinks does not matter."

"You never explained why you needed a live in servant, you just told me you had one and she was nicknamed Winky – another thing you never explained. Why would you have a maidservant that lived in your house, you're a bachelor, and you're not exactly making an extraordinary amount of money. She doesn't seem to want anything from you at all, she wears almost the same exact clothing every time I visit, and she has the strangest speech patterns."

"You never complained before. You merely accepted things as they were." Harry said quietly, trying not to get angry, he'd even brought things up to her before, since Winky was rarely introduced to people, but Jamie had simply nodded an acceptance and never said anything further on it. While Winky was not someone that was going to be a decision maker for him on matters of love, she was important to him, and how others reacted to her had always been a deciding factor in any relationships. The fact that Jamie had so readily accepter her at the time had given him hope for someday in the future when he had to explain the truth about his life.

Jamie's eyes narrowed. "Well you did not have a 22 year old model sleeping at your house who, by all accounts I've been hearing lately, looks better than every other woman that exists. A woman who, I may add, has made it quite obvious that she wants to sleep with you."

Harry sighed, he didn't like the way this conversation was going, he knew Jamie was jealous, but he was trying to make her understand she didn't need to be. He had barely even thought about such things. Gabrielle was... well, irritating at best. He could handle her with relative ease, should he need to. He was sad that Jamie didn't understand that though, he had done his best to try and make her realize how much he loved her, or thought he did. He had let Gabrielle stay, yes, but it was not for any reasons that even remotely had anything to do with the two of them having any relations. She needed a place, she was someone he knew from the past, and, in part, he had wanted to irritate Jamie in hopes that she would come to realize how much he meant to her. Obviously things were not working as he planned.

"I really did love you, you know? But, somehow you're quickly becoming someone I don't even want to know. I have professed my love to you at least twice in the past year, I would hope that you knew me well enough to know I would not simply push you aside because someone from my past showed up at my doorstep."

"When she looks like a slut and is ready to jump in your bed what else am I to think? It wouldn't surprise me at all, after all, you seemed all too happy to let her stay at your place while she 'looked for a place to live' as she says."

"Jamie, please don't say this," Harry said quietly, feeling even more downtrodden than he had before. The conversation was fast approaching things he didn't want to talk about. It really hurt him because he had trusted her so much with his feelings, even after she'd said no to his proposal. He had continued to hope that perhaps she just needed more time, and waited for her to show signs of interest so he could begin dating her again. Now, now he was finding it difficult to hope for such a thing. He had seen woman turn like this many times, and it was not something he wanted to see in Jamie.

His quiet tone seemed to only enrage her more. "I don't care what you want to hear from me! I'm going to say whatever I please! You... you are exactly the sort of person I though you were. It is unforgivable!"

Harry sighed, staring at her. There was a feeling tugging at his heart, like something had just gone terribly wrong and would never be fixed. Until now he hadn't once lost hope about her eventually coming around. In fact, the jealousy had been a good sign, at least at first. He had hoped that she would agree to start dating him at least, and once he'd moved Gabrielle out he would try to get on with his life.

However, she had turned into... something he wasn't so sure about. Twenty minutes before, if she would have said she was ready to marry him, he would have gladly taken the offer. Now, now he wasn't so sure. He listened to her rant, glassy-eyed, having heard it all before. He knew what she was saying, and he was sad to hear it coming from her lips. No matter where he went, it always turned out like this. Whether it was because of a miscommunication or because people couldn't accept that his best friend – or his former best friend – had been a girl, it always came to the same argumentative end.

As she went on, Harry wondered if this could have all been prevented by simply not showing an interest in the Dursley's affairs. If he hadn't shown up to see who was bothering them, would Gabrielle have continued her quest? He suspected she might have, but would she have been successful? Or, perhaps if he'd spoken to her then, would things have been different?

He hated her for a moment, hated that, in a week she'd destroyed nearly everything he'd carefully built. The community was a small one, and though it wasn't exactly a perfect place, he would matter, because he always mattered wherever he went.

When she was done she excused herself and Harry just let out a long sigh. He knew what he needed, some quiet time to rethink his life and the decisions he'd made. One thing he was certain about, Gabrielle was going to find her own place, and soon.

• Last Updated 2006.02.23 •