The Girl Next Door
"Husband?" Erik said flatly, looking closely at Christine.
"Ex husband." Christine said hurriedly, looking at him desperately with wide, insistent eyes. Raoul shrugged.
"Well, if we're going to be technical-"
"We are. Why are you here?" Christine said in an infuriated tone, turning back to him.
"I wanted to talk to you." He said simply.
Christine closed her eyes for a moment and Erik waited. She opened her eyes again and looked at Raoul.
"…You'd better come in." Erik instantly turned and tapped in the code. The door opened and the three of them, plus cat, went into the building. There was a very uncomfortable silence in the elevator. Erik glanced briefly at Raoul. His hands were thrust into his pockets and he kept looking at Christine. Cat was twining his way around Christine's feet, throwing glares from one man to the other at this invasion of his and Christine's after-work alone time.
They stopped at the fifth floor and they all got out. Raoul followed Erik and Christine down the hallway. Erik opened his door and then looked across at Christine. She was watching him anxiously.
"Are you-?"
"I will be in my apartment. If you need me." He said, casting a quick glance at Raoul, who blinked in astonishment. Christine nodded and smiled weakly before unlocking her door and standing back to let Raoul in. She cast a last look at Erik and then followed him inside.
Raoul was stood in the living room, looking around.
"This is a really nice place, Christine."
"What the hell are you doing here?" Christine said angrily, wrenching her coat off and flinging it at the hook. Raoul stared at her.
"Christine, I just wanted to see you."
"Raoul, we are divorced. I have set myself up with a new life here and I did that so we wouldn't have to see each other anymore! For God's sake, why now? Just when things are getting better and I'm actually getting back on top of everything, you have to come along and ruin it all again!" Christine said, kicking her shoes off and storming into the kitchen to pour milk for Cat. Once he was drinking, she turned back to her old husband. He was watching her with a furrowed brow.
"Christine, don't you think it's a little childish to keep up this 'not seeing each other' thing?"
"No, Raoul, I don't. I found that it was working extremely well." Christine said.
"Did you get my Christmas present?" He asked.
"…No. I didn't." She lied, thinking about the box that had been tossed straight into the rubbish chute. "And that's another thing – divorced people don't send each other Christmas presents! What is wrong with you?"
Raoul watched as she moved around the living room, clearing dirty cups and pushing pieces of paper into folders.
"Chris, stop." She looked at him and he swallowed. "I couldn't do it. I couldn't live without you. I know… it wasn't easy, us being together. But the divorce was so rushed and-"
"Why was it rushed?" Christine demanded. Raoul breathed heavily.
"Because you wanted to leave."
"That's right. I told you all of this before I moved out. Our marriage was a disaster, we were both miserable!" She said angrily.
"I think we should try again."
Christine laughed. She couldn't help it. The mere notion of it was ridiculous.
"Have you completely taken leave of your senses?" She asked. "Don't you remember what it was like?"
"Yes, I do. I remember how happy we were." Raoul said quietly. "I know things got rough towards the end but at first, they were so great. We were good together, Christine."
Christine sank into an armchair, putting her head in her hands.
"I can't believe I'm hearing this." She mumbled into her fingers. Raoul dropped the flowers onto the coffee table and moved to sit in front of her.
"Christine… c'mon. Remember when we first got married? We were so happy. We were great together and we had so many plans…"
"And then you lost interest." Christine reminded him. "I got wrapped up in my work, you were busy taking care of the family name and we could barely stand the sight of each other anymore. We made each other unhappy and angry all the time. God… you actually have the worst timing in the world."
"Why?"
"I am so close to having… to being with someone. Someone that I really want to be with." Christine said crossly. "And now he'll probably never even talk to me again!"
"Why not? …You mean that guy?" Raoul said, his eyes widening as he gestured to the door. "That guy is who you want to be with?"
"Yes, Raoul! And his name is Erik, not 'that guy'."
Raoul took her hands in his.
"Christine, I came here to win you back. And I'm not leaving until I have." He said softly.
Erik paced his apartment, trying to understand what had just happened.
Her husband.
She had been married.
…This threw a new light on things.
He had briefly considered playing the piano. But he was too unsettled. Then the thought of trying to eavesdrop had occurred but he had instantly dismissed that as unconscionable. Quite simply, he could not do anything except pace. And that pastime was getting old fast.
Time passed by painfully slowly. Every time he looked at the clock, it hadn't moved. In fact, at one point he was quite sure that the hands had gone backwards a few minutes. After glaring at the clock, he returned to pacing.
Finally, over an hour later, he heard voices. He crossed to the door and opened it. Christine was stood in the doorway, leaning against the frame as Raoul moved down the hallway, flowers still in hand and with a dejected look on his face. He looked at Erik as he appeared, cast him a disbelieving glance up and down and then disappeared.
Erik waited until the doors had closed and then looked at Christine. She was staring at the wall, arms folded in front of her protectively, jaw fixed stiffly. After several moments of tense silence, Erik reached across and touched her arm. She looked at him and smiled tiredly.
"Well… I suppose I should tell you my part now."
"I'm guessing that he was a big part of it?" Erik said, gesturing to the elevator that had just taken Raoul away. Christine sighed and nodded slowly.
"Yeah. He was a pretty big part."
"Why was he here?" Erik asked. He knew he shouldn't really ask but he had to know. Christine brushed her hair out of her face.
"He wanted me to come back to him. He wanted to give it another try."
"…I see."
"I said no." Christine added, glancing at him. Erik didn't react. But his heart had instantly lightened.
She moved back into her apartment and Erik followed. Christine picked up Cat, who was walking agilely across the back of the sofa. He purred noisily as she rubbed her face against his soft fur. She looked across at Erik and then sat down. He did too, a little way off. She clearly needed some space. Christine curled up on her chair, Cat lying comfortably across her knees.
"Raoul comes in later, in the big picture. The first part is to do with my parents." She said slowly. "I told you what happened, didn't I?"
"Your mother was in a car crash and your father took his own life."
"Yes. But I didn't tell you why he killed himself. I haven't told anybody."
She took a deep breath, bracing herself before meeting his eyes.
"My father loved Mum so much. He couldn't live without her." She said softly. "And he couldn't stand the sight of me."
"Why?" Erik whispered.
"In that car crash, Mum died." Christine swallowed hard. "And I didn't."
They looked at each for a moment and then Christine put her head against the side of the headrest, staring into space.
"I survived. A broken leg, lots of cuts and bruises, but nothing life-threatening. Mum was rushed into an operating theatre and the doctors worked for hours to try and save her. But she died on the operating table. Dad didn't come and see me after that. I was only in hospital for a couple of days but he didn't… When I got home, he couldn't look at me anymore without becoming depressed. He was working late all the time, leaving early just so he wouldn't have to see me."
"Christine-"
"Sometimes I caught him looking at me. He always looked away straight away but I could see it in his eyes. He was wondering why I had lived and she hadn't. Why should I be the one to live? What was life without her?"
A slightly bitter tone had crept into Christine's voice. But it was greatly overshadowed by sorrowful desperation.
"I tried so hard to make things better. I worked hard in school, got all of my A levels, enough to get into any of the universities that I had applied to. But the summer when I got my results… I had a part time job at a café, as a waitress. I got home one night, after my shift and… and I found the police there, and my neighbour."
She swallowed hard.
"Dad had… he cut his wrists. I didn't… I didn't see anything. The police kept me downstairs, he was in the bathroom." She whispered. "That was his final gift to me. He had already sorted everything, the money, the house, all of the arrangements for the funeral… there was an envelope with everything in it that I would need. And he had made sure to invite the neighbour over for a drink, two hours after he was going to do it. So that I wouldn't be the one to find him. It was almost an apology for everything that had happened."
Erik watched her. She was stroking Cat's fur gently, but her fingers were trembling as she related the grisly tale to him. She licked her dry lips and said,
"I went to university, a local one. And it was there that I met Raoul. By that point I was a mess and I just clung to him so tight. We married a couple of months after we graduated and I moved in with him and his family, across town. We were married for two years and… things went bad. We were just so different. He was in the family business and I wasn't expected to work, but I wanted to. So I applied at Populaire Advertising and got the job straight away.
At first things were fine. We were both so busy; we didn't really get to see a lot of each other. And things just went downhill. I just threw myself into work and I began to realise that I had only married him because I thought that I needed to be with someone to be worth anything. I wanted to prove to myself that just because Dad hadn't been able to stand me, someone else could.
We started fighting over stupid, trivial little things. It got worse and I started staying at Meg's house overnight, because I just couldn't stand the thought of sleeping in the same bed as him anymore. And last year I told him that I wanted a divorce. He didn't argue and I set it all up. Because his family was well known it was quick and discreet. I lived with Meg for a couple of days and then Firmin said that he had a friend who was landlord for some apartments and there was one going free."
Christine looked up at Erik.
"So I moved in straight away. And the rest… well, you already know it all." She said simply. She felt almost proud of herself. She had done it, and without even crying. In fact, she felt almost detached from the whole experience, as though she had been recounting someone else's life to him.
She stood up and Cat quickly lay down on the warm patch of chair she had created. Walking slowly in front of the fireplace, Christine said in a measured voice,
"I have done so many things that are wrong. My life, it just seems to have been one big mistake after another. I drove my father to end his own life; I couldn't even make my marriage work. I didn't think that I could to anything right. But I… I did it. I stood on my own two feet and… I thought that I was so capable. But then Stuart came along and I realised that I couldn't be alone. I didn't want to be alone so I just hung onto him when I shouldn't have done."
Christine stopped and looked at him.
"And you… you made me realise that it was wrong. Whilst you were away I realised that I couldn't go my whole life just hanging onto other people until I felt safe enough to let go. I need someone who needs me too." She said.
It was almost an invitation. Erik stood and moved to stand in front of her. Christine looked up at him, eyes guarded but somehow pleading at the same time.
"I'm not going to say that I love you." She whispered. "I need you, more than anything in my life. But please don't ask me to say that. It hurts too much to admit it."
"I don't need to hear it." Erik said in a murmur.
His arms went around her, holding her tightly to him. She leant her head against his chest, clutching his arms desperately. Unshed tears filled her eyes and she mumbled into his torso.
"Please don't leave me…" Her voice was broken and tearful. "Please don't ever leave me."
"I won't." Erik whispered, a lump rising in his own throat as he heard her desperate plea.
"I've had this dream." She murmured, lifting her head to look at him but not letting go of him, in case something decided to tear him away.
"Dream?"
"You promised that you wouldn't leave and then I woke up and you weren't there."
"This isn't a dream." He said. Christine's lip trembled and she bit on it.
"But I don't know, you could… I… I can't…I don't want to wake up and…"
"This isn't a dream, Christine." Erik whispered.
"But-"
"So don't wake up." He interrupted and he kissed her.
She didn't run away this time. She didn't do anything but kiss him back. It was soft and chaste and sweet. After a few moments, Christine pulled her face away from his and looked at him, her expression clear and pure. Erik tightened his arms around her and she lifted her hands to his face. He closed his eyes tightly, knowing what she was doing. Oh God, he didn't want her to do it.
But he had promised.
He felt her soft fingers on the mask and there was rush of air as she lifted it away and exposed the misshapen flesh beneath. He waited for the scream, for the struggle to escape his arms. But nothing happened other than an almost inaudible intake of breath. Hardly daring to do so, he opened his eyes. Christine hadn't moved from his grasp. As his eyes opened, she ran a finger nervously over the red, twisted skin, the blue veins showing up far too obviously to be normal. The eye seemed sunken in and the nose seemed to be falling in on itself. Christine explored the skin with careful fingers, being extraordinarily gentle so as not to risk causing him pain because that was the absolute last thing that she wanted. Erik watched closely until her fingers stopped, on the hollow of his cheek.
She looked him in the eyes and he saw determination there. She spread her fingers over his cheek and spoke softly but firmly.
"And I wept both night and day
And he wiped my tears away."
And before Erik could even react to the words, she had lifted her face to his and all he knew was that she was kissing him and that he was holding her and that he had what so many people never got in a lifetime.
A second chance.
If this had been in a film, the obvious next step would have been for Erik to carry Christine to the bedroom and for them to make passionate love.
What actually happened was that they collapsed on the sofa and fell asleep. The day had taken its toll on them both and while they meant to talk, both were soon asleep. Erik lay with his arms curled about Christine, her face pressing into his chest as they slept peacefully.
They woke in the morning when Cat decided that it would be terribly amusing to jump onto Erik's leg and dig his claws in. Erik woke with a yell and swiped at the animal, which hissed and darted under the table, yowling. Christine awoke with a start, caught sight of Erik and let out a confused gasp and falling off the edge of the table and hitting her head on the table. Erik sat up and reached for his mask as Christine sat up, holding her head. Cat crawled into Christine's lap and glared at Erik.
For a moment they were silently puzzled and then Christine said,
"…That was bizarre."
"I can't say that I've ever woken up like that before." Erik said and glanced at Cat. "I don't think he approves of me." He stood and extended a hand to help her to her feet. Christine accepted it, but once she was stood, sudden shyness came over her. Erik apparently didn't feel entirely comfortable either. She looked up at him and smiled.
"Good morning."
"And to you." He said quietly. Christine put Cat on the sofa, where he stood watching them like a disapproving parent. Erik slid his arm around her waist and put his chin on top of her head.
"My apologies for the rude awakening. It cannot have been the most pleasant to wake up, seeing…"
"It didn't scare me, Erik. I just wasn't expecting to see you." She said firmly. And then she saw the clock. "God, it can't be that time!"
He glanced over at the clock and winced. They both had twenty minutes before they were due to be at work. He released her and she looked at him.
"I've got to have a shower and find some clean clothes!"
"I'll go and change." He said, heading to the door. Christine nodded and then paused. Tentatively, she pressed her mouth to his and then rushed off to the bedroom.
"Good afternoon, Christine." Meg said cheerfully as Christine arrived at work. She glared at the blonde woman.
"I'm only ten minutes late."
"Which is fifteen minutes later than usual." Meg pointed out. "What were you doing?"
"I just overslept." Christine said. Meg followed her into her office.
"Just overslept. Rather convenient. Did Erik just oversleep as well?"
Christine closed the door to her office and looked at Meg.
"You have the subtlety of a ton of bricks, do you know that?"
"It's been mentioned. Something happened, didn't it?" Meg said eagerly. Christine couldn't help smiling slightly.
"Sort of. But you're not going to believe who showed up at my door last night."
"Who?"
"Only my ex-husband."
"What? Why?" Meg said, falling into a chair.
"He wanted me to go back to him." Christine said, turning on her computer and sitting down. "I said no, obviously."
Meg whistled.
"I swear that you just stepped out of a soap opera." She said. "This sort of thing just doesn't happen in real life. But what happened with Erik?"
"Well, once I got rid of Raoul, Erik came over and I told him everything about Raoul and my parents. And then… well, we kissed and then we fell asleep."
"You fell asleep?" Meg said disbelievingly. "You fell asleep. You have been waiting for this guy for over three months and your first night together you fall asleep?"
"He fell asleep too." Christine said defensively.
Meg just shook her head.
"I despair of you, Christine. Well, I'm going to go and do some work. Once I see if Sorelli's stopped throwing up yet."
And with those charming parting words, she disappeared. Christine tapped a pen on her desk and started to work. In truth, she didn't really know what to do now. It had been fairly easy to deal with Stuart as a boyfriend.
But Erik was different. Christine didn't know where they were, what they were to each other, how this would work. She clicked her tongue as she looked at the computer screen, her mind miles away. Last night she had been so upset and then so happy and then she'd felt so much contentment. She and Erik had truly connected. She knew how much it must have taken for him to reveal his face to her, the face that had caused him so much pain.
But what of his face? Yes, it was terrible. That didn't change him as a person, did it? No, of course not. It simply made him more admirable. To have gone through so much pain and still be able to tell her what had happened… he needed her as much as she needed him. It was clear to her. They were like two shipwrecked survivors, clinging to each other for life in a sea of despair.
At lunchtime she joined Sorelli and Meg by the coffee machine, where they poured over the sonogram prints of the baby. Christine had to admit, it didn't look like more than a wobbly blot at the moment, but Sorelli was so ridiculously proud that she couldn't bring herself to say anything. Christine winced as her burn twinged painfully.
"Is it feeling any better?" Meg asked sympathetically.
"Yes, but it still hurts a bit." Christine admitted. Sorelli was now showing her prints off to a large group of people that had just come back from the café, Carlotta and Firmin among. Meg laughed.
"She's going to be a fantastic mum."
"I know. She's just so proud and it's not even a proper baby yet." Christine smiled.
They all looked up as a delivery person came in.
"Is Christine Daae here?" He called. Christine stood up apprehensively.
"Yes…"
"Flowers for you." The man said, handing them to her. It was a single red rose, surrounded by a spray of tiny white flowers and tied with a black silk ribbon.
"Thank you." Christine said, smiling shyly as everyone surged forward to investigate. There was a card attached and written on it in elegantly scrawling handwriting were words that Christine knew.
Love seeketh not itself to please
Nor for itself hath any care
But for another gives its ease
And builds a Heaven in Hells despair
Is this preferable to wine and chocolates?
Erik
"I don't get it." Meg said, after scanning the poem.
"Inside joke." Christine said.
"Did he write that poem? How sweet!" Sorelli cooed.
"No, it's Blake." Christine explained.
"Erik? As if in, Erik Destler? The guy from the Hawthorn Theatre?" Jammes asked curiously. "Are you going out with him?"
Firmin and Carlotta both looked up instantly. Firmin with a surprised look on his face and Carlotta with a furious one. Christine looked at her boss and he smiled with a slight eye roll, as if to say 'Well, if you must'.
"…Sort of." Christine said and then changed her mind. "Yes, we are seeing each other." Sorelli read the poem again and said,
"Who wrote it again?"
"William Blake."
"Oh. How did you know that?"
"Because I love Blake." Christine said.
"And he knew? Who knew he was such a romantic?" Sorelli smiled.
Christine glanced at her watch.
"OK, lunch is over. I'm getting back to work." She extracted herself from the departing group and found herself face to face with Carlotta. The blonde woman gave her a look of pure hatred before moving onwards. Which only managed to further improve Christine's good mood.
A/N: I hope this chapter is a little more pleasing than the last! And I hope that Erik and Christine's moment there was convincing. I agree, that was a terrible cliff-hanger in the last chapter. But I just couldn't resist. The poem used in this chapter is 'The Clod and the Pebble' from 'Songs of Experience.' Seriously, if you haven't read any Blake poems, I recommend that you do. 'The Angel', 'The Tyger' and pretty much anything from 'Songs of Experience' are wonderful. You can find all of his poems on the internet, just search on google!
I'll be honest now – I'm not entirely sure where this is going from now on. I'm almost a little disappointed that Erik and Christine are together! It's so much fun to write them separately, with all that tension! I'll try and keep that in from now on. But I really only planned this up to Erik and Christine getting together. I need to think about where to go now because I am not ready to end this story when there's still so much to do with it!
When I posted the last chapter, all the other chapters decided to randomly rearrange themselves. You know, just for the fun of it. So I spent ages rearranging them, which was very difficult, because I only come up with a chapter name when I'm posting the chapter. So I had to check each chapter, compare it with my saved copy and then reorganise it all into the right order! Thanks for everyone who emailed to tell me it was messed up. It should be back to normal by now.
Thanks for all the reviews. I loved them all!
Love
Katie