Kim hated that she was late home. With all the goings on in her life right now all she wanted to do at the end of the day was get home and be with her kids. They were the only things that made sense and if she was with them she could protect them, keep them safe while everything else was so unstable. Daisy was already asleep and she had crept into her room and sat with her for a while recovering from yet another pointless discussion downstairs. Daisy obviously felt things keenly and Kim was worried about how this was all affecting her but watching her sleep always helped calm her.

Steve had been waiting for her in the kitchen when she got home having picked up Daisy from his mother's after work. "Long day Huh?"

He was trying to break down her walls again but lately they seemed to get higher. Regret was not an emotion that was familiar to him. You made mistakes in life but you learnt from them and moved on but he did have one regret and that he should never have hit Oliver.

"Yep. How's Daisy?"

"Good." He drummed his fingers on the cup of coffee he was holding. "She wants to know when I am coming home?"

"I'll talk to her again." Kim poured herself a coffee despite the fact she would have preferred a wine but that was hardly appropriate or fair.

"Or I could come home?" He watched as her shoulders sagged a little as she leant on the bench. "You know I love you Kim and Daisy." She bit her tongue and waited. "And Oliver too." Her son was an afterthought to him. It wasn't always this way but things changed once Daisy was born. Oliver had been concerned that he would get shoved aside with the new baby, like any child did. Kim worked hard to make sure he didn't feel that way; Steve hadn't been so great at it and the older Oliver got the worse he became.

"We've talked about this."

"No, you've talked." She jumped as he banged his fist on the table. "What about Daisy? Don't you care how this is affecting her?"

"Of course I care. I also care about Oliver."

"He's sulking in his room again." He waved his hand angrily in the direction of the stairs. "He won't even talk to me."

"You hit him." She could never forgive him for that, no matter what else was happening at the moment. That was the deal breaker. He had given her son a black eye. She knew he regretted it, she knew that it was the alcohol and he had never done anything like that before, but he had hit her son and that she could never forgive because for every person who turned abusive there was always a first time, and a desperate apology followed by a second time then a third. She wasn't about to let that happen to her son. "What do you expect?"

Steve had agreed to go to AA; he hadn't touched a drop since and vowed he never would again if it meant getting his family back but Kim was adamant that it was over. The longer this went on the more she dug her heels in. Initially she would let him come over for dinner and stay with them until Daisy was asleep hoping that she wouldn't notice that he was no longer living at home but lately she had stopped that. Daisy knew he wasn't around so she saw no need in continuing the charade.

"And I apologised. What more can I do?"

"It's not that easy."

Realising that anger was not going to get him anywhere he softened his tone. "It could be if you would let it."

"No, no it isn't. I know you never loved Oliver as much as you love Daisy but I never thought you would hurt him." Kim almost choked on the words. This was all getting too much, she was overwhelmed lately and could barely keep her head above water. "I can't put him at risk, I can't ignore how he feels, I won't. He's my son."

"You never wanted me to be his father." That was unexpected. "You never wanted me to adopt him." That was true and they had argued about it and that was when things probably really started falling apart. Unless Ollie agreed Kim was hesitant to go through with it. Ollie seemed okay knowing that he had two fathers. Adam's family always made him feel wanted and Kim never wanted him to lose his link to Adam and she was worried about taking that away from him and what it would do to Adam's parents. It would have devastated them and she couldn't do it.

"You were the only father he ever knew. He looked up to you and you destroyed that. Day by day you broke him down. You stopped going to his games, his school assemblies, you stopped caring about him. Did you think he didn't notice?"

"Fine, whatever Kim." He pushed his chair back angrily; the rough sound of wood scraping on wood sent a shiver up her spine. "I will pick up Daisy from school Friday for the weekend."

While sitting with Daisy Kim let her mind wander. She started thinking about what Steve had said. Did she really care about how this was affecting Daisy? Of course she did. She would have done exactly the same thing if it had been Daisy that he had hurt. Obviously Daisy was upset and would lash out at Kim sometimes but she had made sure that she still saw Steve, spent time with her parents and when they were together she lavished her with attention and the three of them would hang out and have some fun. They were coping, it was for the best and despite missing her father she was happier at home without all the tension. Kim knew that and she had to not let Steve put doubts in her mind, she had enough concerns right now. Like her son and the sudden reappearance of his real father.

Kim knocked on Oliver's door and when he didn't answer so she went in anyway. "Hey Bud, How was your day?"

Oliver just glared at her and continued playing his computer game. "Fine."

"I am sorry I am late."

"Okay."

"What's up Ollie?" Kim grabbed the game controller from his hand and held it up out of his reach as he tried to get it back.

"I went and saw Al today."

Kim felt all the air leave her lungs and she sat down heavily on the edge of his bed. "Oh."

It wasn't unusual for Oliver to jump on his bike and ride over to see Al. He hadn't seen him much lately, he always seemed busy for some reason and his mother suddenly stopped encouraging him to visit. He had sent his mother a message to let her know that he was going to a friends place after school but had gone to see Al instead. He felt that he was being kept away from him and he wanted to know why. He needed Al more than ever right now. As long as he was home by six and had his phone on him at all times his mother would be okay.

Al was surprised to see him. "Does your mother know you are here?"

"No. She's working. Daisy is with him so I thought I would come and see you."

"Hey O." Adam stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the young boy standing in Al's kitchen and muttered an apology. Something about the boy rattled him. It was the messy dark blond hair, the brown eyes and long eyelashes and the slightly crooked grin looking back at him, it was like looking in a mirror. "Hey, I'm Adam. I used to work with Al."

"Hi." The boy stuttered, his eyes wide with something that could only be called shock.

"This is Oliver." Al rested both hands on the boy's shoulders, trying to steady him. Al knew that Kim still hadn't told Oliver that his father was alive and back in Chicago. He also knew that Kim hadn't told Adam that he was a Father. He didn't agree with it and he warned her again yesterday to do it soon. Al and Adam's parents had told her that the clock was ticking and today, time had just run out.

They had never kept Adam a secret from Oliver. He knew about his father, he knew his name was Adam Ruzek and they had all worked together. And then there was the fact that he looked exactly like him. That was not lost on Al when he saw the look on Adam's face. He knew, at that precise moment that Adam had figured it out as well.

"Nice to meet you Oliver." Adam extended his hand and Oliver shook it before turning and looking at Al for some kind of reassurance. Kim had told him her son was six and her daughter was four, this boy, Oliver was Kim's son. This boy wasn't six.

Adam had seen the panicked look on Oliver's face and beat a hasty exit. His head was spinning. He had a million questions, he had rage and anger and a painful ache in his gut.

What the actual fuck?

When he returned to Al's place Oliver had gone home. Oliver had lashed out at Al before he left, accusing him of lying to him. He was scared and confused and felt betrayed by everyone. Al rang both Adam and Kim and neither of them were answering. This was exactly what he dreaded, that they would find out and not the way they should. Kim should have been the one to tell them both.

"Tell me about my son." Adam put his keys and phone on the table and grabbed a beer from the fridge. Al watched him; his movements were slow and deliberate. Surprisingly he didn't look angry and that was a little unexpected.

"You need to talk to Kim."

"Al, just tell me." The pained look on his face made Al feel like shit. He hated keeping this secret from him. He'd been through enough.

"Please talk to Kim."

"I've been talking to her for weeks. I've talked to her everyday since the weekend, I've sat here with her and she said nothing." Suddenly and unexpectedly his chest heaved. He deserved to learn this from Kim. This was not how he needed to find out. "Why would she keep this from me? I had a right to know."

"Kim wants you to know, both of you but you can't blame her for holding back. Three weeks ago she did not even know you were alive. You've been gone for nine years." Al placed a steadying hand on his arm he didn't want him spinning off in god knows what direction and saying or doing something he'd regret.

"I know, don't you think I fucking know that?" he pressed his fingers to his temples while he may have been talking quietly Al could sense a shit load of anger was bubbling away beneath the surface. Why did everyone think this was easy for him? Why did they think that he could just pick up where he left off, like the last nine years never happened? It was a daily struggle to wrap his head around everything that had gone on lately. "I lived every single fucking day of those nine years too."

"She's got to do what she thinks is best for both her children. I know that's what you would want her to do, what she has done for eight years. She's protected him."

He may have calmed down now but he had exploded all over his Dad's place. As soon as Bob opened the door he could see Adam's rage. "Did you know? How come no one thought to tell me that I had a son?"

"Adam, calm down."

"I will not fucking calm down. I just walked into Al's house and he's standing in the kitchen." He was waving his arms and pacing around the room. "Oliver is Kim's son. He's my son?"

"Adam, don't be angry at Kim. She doesn't need it. It's been tough for her, all of this. You coming back, her marriage falling apart and she is just trying to do what's best for Oliver. She always has."

"Do you see him?"

"From the moment he was born." He grabbed Adam by the arm and led him down the hall and showed him Oliver's room. "When Kim told us she was pregnant she always wanted us to know our grandchild. He's here all the time; we go to his games, his concerts and all his assemblies. We have spent every Christmas with him and all his birthdays. He's a Ruzek. We couldn't have made it without Oliver and Kim."

"I guess that explains why you and Mom actually get along now. For Oliver?" The knot in his chest was not easing off. He had a son. He had a son with Kim, the woman he wanted to spend his life with. Was this why he could never let her go? Was there something buried deep within him that even he couldn't feel that told him not to let go?

"Yes, we'd lost you and suddenly we had this baby. Kim needed us and that was more important than some decades long feud we had going on." He did like the thought of that, that somehow this had bought his family together. It was strangely comforting at a time when he was spinning out of control.

"Why didn't she tell me?" He sat on the edge of Oliver's bed. His anger was subsiding as the shock started to kick in. "Does she think I won't care?"

"Not at all, she knows that you will want to meet him and be part of his life. She's knows that you won't step back so Kim wanted to make sure you were both ready. It's a huge deal for Oliver. He has always known about you, but he thinks you are dead. He's just a kid Adam. This is a big change for him."

"Well I think he knows now."

Kim didn't even blink; she just stared at her son. Now she wished she had taken the time to listen to the messages on her phone. It wasn't until she'd finished work that she had even had the chance to look at it and saw all her missed calls. There were a few from Al and Steve and one from Adam. It was strange to see his name pop up on her phone again, she still wasn't used to that. There was a time when her phone was constantly lit up with his messages and then they had nothing for a long while. Slowly it started again when she was back up in Intelligence and they had their strange thing going on.

She had even dialled that number several times when she was in the throes of grief just to listen to his voice again and then one day the number was disconnected and she had thrown her own phone against the wall in despair.

"Mom," Oliver pulled her focus back. His eyes were questioning and full of fear and confusion. "Was that my Dad? That man at Al's place, Adam? Is he my Dad?"

"Oh Oliver. Yes he is." Her hands were shaking uncontrollably. She knew it was risky to hold off on telling either of them but she honestly had no idea how to even broach the subject and she was terrified of their reactions. What if Oliver hated her? What if Adam did? "I'm sorry Sweetheart. I should have told you."

"You said he was dead." He was confused. All along his mother had told him that his father had died in a car accident before he was born but now all of a sudden here he was. As soon as he had said his name was Adam and that he worked with Al he knew who he was, he just couldn't figure it all out. All these years they had talked about his Dad, told stories about him and told him how much he looked like his Dad. When he saw him he just knew. He looked to Al but he said nothing.

"He was." Kim pulled her son into her lap. "I thought he was. We all did."

"Did he not want me? Jed at school says that his Dad left because he didn't want him."

"No sweetheart, No. He would have loved you. He would have been so happy to know about you. We've talked about this and nothing I ever told you was a lie." Kim was hoping that she wasn't lying to him now, that Adam wouldn't turn his back on his son. "I was told he had died, we had a funeral and I missed him so much. I had no idea, I swear Oliver. I would never have done that to you." Tears were streaming down Kim's face and Oliver reached up and wiped them away. He hated seeing his mother cry.

"So he doesn't hate me?"

"God Oliver, No. A few weeks ago Al told me that Adam was alive. He'd been unable to contact anyone for nine years because of what happened at that job he went away on. It's called Witness Protection and they basically take away your whole life and identity and you live as someone completely new. It was for his own safety and the safety of his family."

"You and me?"

"Yes, I guess for our safety." Although she didn't know that for sure. She wasn't even sure that he cared about her at all, at least at the time the way he left without a word made her think that. "The people who were looking for him would have come looking for me, and Pops and Grandma. He didn't want us to get hurt but he had no idea I was pregnant. He didn't know about you, I swear. I only found out that I was pregnant with you just before they told me he had died."

Oliver seemed to be processing what she was telling him but then he looked at his mother and looked so utterly distraught. It was a crushing blow for Kim, to see her son's pain and devastation. She had tried to protect him and had obviously failed and as a mother that was heartbreaking. He was her precious boy, he had saved her and Kim had let him down.

"Why doesn't anyone want to be my Dad?"

A/N: Just a little Christmas Cliff-hanger for you J. I know some of you were desperate to have Adam meet Oliver, and now they have, sort of. Hope it didn't disappoint, there was no way I was going to make it easy though, where is the fun in that. Have a cool Yule everyone & see you in the New Year!