The Motley Tale
King Van Halen's castle was said to be a Castle In The Sky due to the fact that it was built upon a mountain top and the mountain was surrounded by dense, thick clouds of smoke. Legend has it that this smoke is from the King himself and his terrible addiction to cigarettes, but that's only a legend. King Van Halen wears a suit of armor made from pure titanium (the strongest metal at the time) and a red cloak with black and white splashes all over. On a chilly fall morning a messenger by the name of David Lee Roth left the sky castle with a letter addressed to Vince Neil the greatest blacksmith of all time. Roth was wearing clothing fit to be a jester. He was very messed up in the head. Now Neil lived in a very dangerous country called Planet Boom. So Roth first had to meet up with his bodyguard Nikki Sixx the keenest and bravest warrior of that time.
The two men reach the outskirts of Planet Boom and contemplate the perfect route. They choose the path Over the Mountain. They were riding jet black horses so they knew the horses would stand out in the ice of the mountains. Nikki, being very crafty, hunts down a pack of polar bears and uses their hide to keep him and Roth warm and to camouflage them and their horses. Finally they reach the mountain top. They felt as if they were standing on Top Of The World. Then all of a sudden they hear a Rebel Yell and four barbaric men riding huge wolf-like creatures are rushing Nikki and Roth. Nikki pulls out his 4 string long bow and fires four arrows that embed into each of the barbarian's hearts. Nikki made a sigh of relief but it was suddenly taken aback when he realized the wolf-like creatures were still attacking; to them Nikki and Roth looked like two juicy polar bears. With a Primal Scream the creatures jump into the air but Nikki reacts and using his sword he slashed and two of the four beasts were down. Nikki let out a scream so loud you thought he was trying to Shout At The Devil. He lunged and caught one beast with his sword but the sword became stuck and Nikki instinctively pulled out his dagger and lashed out and slew the final beast. He walked away battered but not hurt. Nikki took what meat and supplies he could, stacked the bodies and using a torch smote their ruin upon the mountainside.
Finally at daybreak Nikki Sixx and David Lee Roth were in Planet Boom. They were only 19 miles from Tinseltown where Vince Neil lived. The last mile was swamp land but besides abnormally large mosquitoes they were left alone. Finally they had reached the moment of truth. They had reached Tinseltown and were nervous at whether or not Vince would accept this task of sword making. Once Nikki and Roth reached Vince's house they saw a hefty man with bulging muscles and blonde hair, this had to be Vince. Then a skinny sick-looking man wearing a long black trench coat and a top hat with a skull on it walked into view along with a skinny but athletic man with shoulder length sloppy black hair matted down with sweat. The sickly one was named Mick while the other was Tommy. They were a very motley looking crew. Nikki introduced Roth and himself. Roth told Vince what King Van Halen has requested. Vince looked at Roth like he was crazy but Roth chimed in that Vince would be paid very handsomely. Vince seemed interested and took the job. Roth was overjoyed knowing that the king would be very happy.
Vince began at once assembling a list of supplies he'd need. First off he needs an exquisite metal and after long consideration he chose platinum for the sword and gold for decoration. He also considered what stones he'd need for increased beauty. Finally he knew what he needed and prepared for the journey. He told Roth to go back to the castle and for Mick to watch his shop and family. Vince went to his house, packed his survival materials and his mining equipment. He said to his wife Babe I'm Gonna Leave You and gave his kids a hug and he was off with Tommy and Nikki for their dangerous and most likely painful journey to the Avant Garden.
As they left Tinseltown a group of 12 Necron Bandits approached on horseback and they brandished their weapons. Nikki with his 4 string bow and sword, Tommy with his crossbow and oriental Katana, finally Vince with his throwing stars and gigantic, enchanted battle axe named Chimera Flame. The Necrons than reacted by performing the exact same act but they carried halberds and scimitars. Necrons are known to be some of the most ruthless warriors in the entire world; they do not know the word retreat. Knowing that they were out numbered Nikki led the crew to a frozen lake. They crossed it with no problem due to their speed and lack of heavy weight.
When they had reached the other side, the Necrons were half way across and then Vince jumped off his, horse took Chimera Flame, cast the spell and the head of the axe was suddenly engulfed in white flame so hot the horses started to whine. Vince stepped onto the lake and with Chimera hit the ice so hard that the entire lake in front of him shattered and all the Necrons were flung into the freezing waters below. Vince calmly shut off the flame and walked back to his horse as if nothing important had happened. At that point Nikki realized he had just found his new best friend.
The crew carried on their way with no troubling encounters for two weeks. They had stopped here and there at villages to replenish supplies and raise morale. Three weeks into their journey they approached a military bivouac. They approached with extreme caution knowing they were in Black Widow territory. They were soon relieved to see that it was a convoy of King Van Halen's army. The convoy had stopped to celebrate Hooligan's Holiday. Seeing as these men were allies, the crew stopped for refreshments and supplies. They carried on their way after a few hours of celebration.
The crew had only 27 miles to go until they reach the Avant Garden. As they were traveling through a canyon with 500 plus foot walls on either side, a group of Black Widow assassins approached from the top of the left wall. The crew was out of range for the assassin's arrows so the assassins planed to ambush the crew from both sides at the end of the tunnel. Tommy looked up and thought he saw the silhouette of a few men but seeing as they were so high he didn't think much of it, but he still decided to tell the others seeing as it's better to be safe than sorry. As they reached the end of the canyon pass, they were very cautious. Tommy aimed his crossbow above the crew while Nikki pointed his 4 string bow ahead. Vince had Chimera Flame ready since he was able to fling flame.
The assassins attacked from both sides. There were eight of them. Nikki took out four with his bow but they were too close to be able to reload the bow so he drew his sword. Tommy took out an assassin with a bow aiming in on Nikki. Tommy then drew his Katana. Vince was able to take down another with a ball of flame. Nikki threw his sword and completely destroyed an assassin carrying a hand cannon. Vince swung with all his might and decapitated his opponent; there was no blood because the heat instantly cauterized the wound. Tommy jumped high in the air and as he was landing sliced the final assassin right down the middle. The group regained their composure and hopped back on their horses and went on their way.
Finally they had reached the Avant Garden. They disembarked from their horses and started to climb the misty mountain. They found a mining shaft and went in; the tunnel went on for miles. Finally the crew reached their destination, where they find Vince's old stash of platinum, rubies, gold and almost every other precious stone and metal. They gather up what they'll need and leave. All of a sudden the shaft goes dark. It wasn't because of a cave in or night fall but a gigantic creature coming toward them.
It was only after Vince had ignited Chimera Flame did they see what it truly was. It was a grotesque slug-like creature with 5 tentacles each wielding a bladed weapon. Nikki shot it with arrows and they only bounced off the creature's armor-like flesh. But Tommy being the intelligent one realized that if they could get it to open its mouth one blast from Chimera should destroy it.
Tommy decided that he was the best to sacrifice. He ran at the beast and dismembered it of all its limbs. All that was left was the mouth. Tommy got real close and the creature lunged forward with its huge jaws, filled with venomous teeth, open. Tommy jumped back and before the beast could close its mouth Tommy stuck his katana inside the mouth and propped it open. The beast couldn't close his mouth and Vince generated the biggest fireball of his life and shot right into the beast's mouth with unbelievable accuracy. The beast exploded in a blast of flame and gore. But all of a sudden Tommy let out a horrifying scream of agony.
His indestructible sword had been shot back at him when the beast exploded. It had pierced through his liver and he was losing blood fast. Vince was able to remove the sword and cauterize the wound but Tommy had lost so much blood he was entering into a state of coma. Nikki and Vince wrapped Tommy in blankets and hides and anything else they could think of.
They sped off to Planet Boom and Vince's wife who was a skilled apothecary and surgeon. They passed the frozen corpses of the dead they had left from their previous battles. These were Michael Anthony bred horses the fastest in the world and they sped on and on. They had so much speed they were able to jump the lake that Vince had thawed and just kept going. Finally they reached Planet Boom and found King Van Halen himself waiting at Vince's shop. They hurriedly cleared a table and laid Tommy down. Vince's wife was able to reassemble Tommy's liver and all other organs affected.
While Tommy was recovering Vince was hard at work with the sword while Nikki and Mick kept watch along with King Van Halen's body guards. Finally the sword was complete but they waited until Tommy was healed to have the ceremony of the presentation of the sword.
The crew including Mick was escorted to King Van Halen's castle. They were able to rest in luxurious rooms and were treated like royalty. Finally the time had come, Vince was to present the sword that he named Thunderstruck. The ceremony was unbelievable. Over five thousand people had showed up and the food was exquisite. King Van Halen was a Sharp Dressed Man. Vince got on one knee, bowed and held the sword up to the king. King Edward Van Halen took the sword unsheathed it and knighted each member of the crew.
To this day they are referred to as the Motley Crue. That is the Motley Tale.