Title: The Nerve
author: Jmaria
Rating: FR-18
Disclaimer: Joss is god, I am a lowly worshipper.
Spoilers: The series, and for Baby on Board, Just Unsettlin', Nightmare Seduction, Nucleus, Not Whole, Mama Cobb, Tiny Thing Like That, Family Matters, Gathering, Hootenanny or a Shindig (part one and part two), Floozies, Vixens and the Manner of Grief, Miles to Go Before I Sleep, Come a Little Closer, & Don't Worry 'Bout A Thing
Summary: Comeuppance
A/N: See what happens when Jill's sleep/writing is interuppted? I go kinda crazy and start shooting people. In fic. Not in RL. . .well, not yet anyway.
.

The Nerve

Jayne hadn't felt the bullet. Musta been a real small calibur, or Alliance high-tech crap that only burned ruther than fire actual bullets. Didn't see why anyone'd buy that crap.

Musta been aimin' for River, that or they had piss-poor aim. Jayne frowned at that. Nobody on Cadence'd have anything against River. Didn't know anybody but his family. An' they was above shootin' kin - at least he thought they were.

"Get yer gorram ass down, woman. Likely to put a bullet through you faster'n lightenin'," Jayne spat through gritted teeth as he tugged her to the floor.

"I wasn't quick enough. She didn't see, didn't know that one kind of blood would be switched for another," River's voice cracked painfully as she tried to stop the bleeding with one a his Mama's tea towels.

Jayne couldn't help but grimace at the thought of what his mother'd do to him for ruining the pretty little floral thing. River's head snapped back in confusion, and Jayne tried to yank her back towards him, fearin' she'd been hit.

"Safe, took a bullet for me, more than once. Doesn't fear death - but fears his mother's broken heart," River whispered as the sunlit room began to darken around her. "A girl could love you so easily if only you let her."

These were the last words Jayne Cobb heard before he gave in to the darkness.

"Get as many guns as you can carry," Evie was saying to the crew of Serenity. "Got that fancy armor a yours?"

"Yes, Ma'am," Zoe said, taking another gun from Wash.

Mal, Zoe, Wash, Evie and Phoebe were gathered around the large collection of weapons on the kitchen. Kaylee chewed at her nails nervously, her mind straying to River and what trouble Jayne had found them in now. Not that she blamed him or nothin'. Just seemed like it were always him or the Cap'n pullin' 'em into another dandy of a pickle.

"Are we sure Jayne's in trouble?" Kaylee asked.

"My boy a good aim?"

"I guess."

"Then he's in trouble," Evie sighed. She turned to Phoebe. "Run along and get yer brothers. Might need 'em."

"How bad do you reckon it is and how in the - woman, are you suitin' up?" Mal snapped at Evie and Phoebe - who seemed to both reachin' for the shiny metal weapons laid out.

"Boy, that's my firstborn son out there and my two newest grandbabes. I ain't 'bout to leave their lives in yer hands."

"And you?"

"Jayne taught me to shoot when I was six. I can hit a man square between the eyes or the private man bits," Phoebe said grimly, all while efficiently checking to see if the gun in her hand was loaded.

"Who we lookin' to fend off, Mrs. Cobb?" Wash asked cautiously, even though he was backing away from the hormonal teen holding a loaded weapon.

"Most likely, the Weblin Boys and kin," Evie sighed. "If'n that little piss Hessian Weblin knew who Mattie's real momma were, he'd a snatched her up as a babe, which is why I sent her and Simon hiding. Lukas, while a good man, would turn both of 'em over to the proper owners. Know Simon and River're fugees. Oh, Kaylee, sweetie, I do thank you kindly for playin' along," Evie smiled kindly at the girl.

"Oh - it weren't no trouble at all. Honest," Kaylee blushed a bit, feeling awkward and useless. "If Phoebe is goin, I suppose I could fetch the brothers."

"Thanks, Kaylee," Phoebe said, hefting up a shotgun that ought to have knocked her over.

"Sir, we should get moving. Don't think Jayne took much ammo or many weapons."

"He just took Phoebe. Left the whole mess of his weapons here," Evie fretted.

"We'll get to 'em in time. Shepherd, make sure the Doc's ready for wounded," Mal said, leading the way out the doors.

It was too late. The blood pounded through her veins, and River's hand went protectively to her belly. Too late, and help was too far off. They wouldn't make it. It was up to her. Instinct took over, and planting a kiss quickly and firmly on his sweat beaded forehead, she slipped the tiny gun into her hand and did the math.

Simon's bedside manner had always been poor. Especially with children who were doubly frightened. But even he'd been shocked by the girl's reaction. She didn't cry or fuss like normal children would if they had been told to run and hide. She calmly played cat's cradle with a piece of her mother's yarn.

"I'm not scared, and neither should you be. Mama's good at keepin' us all safe. Ain't lost a one of us yet, and I reckon she don't mean too," Mattie sighed, dropping her string.

"You should keep on playin -"

"Yer not good with kids, are ya? S'okay, nobody really knows how ta talk to me. Say I'm too smart fer my own good," Mattie stared at him in the dark little room. Simon sat back in alarm. For a moment, she reminded him so very much of River when she'd been a child. There was a wisdom in her eyes, but acceptance as well.

"Do you have to hide often?"

"Only when the bad men come. S'only happened once or twice afore. Weblin's don't care for Cobb's. I know now why, cause Jayne loved Vera, and they made me."

There was a sadness in her voice, and Simon felt himself once again feel useless. What could he say to this child that would make her feel better? Mattie swatted at his knee.

"I didn't say it so's you'd feel bad fer me. I got a whole family that'd yell at me fer feelin' so sorry fer myself. So do you, you know. Ya got five brothers and eight sisters at least now. So don't feel so glum just cause yer a fugee," Mattie smiled.

"I'm a what? Who told you that?"

"The wanted posters Mama found."

They pushed the mules as fast as they could go without bustin' something vital. The plan was to sneak round back, pull out the newlyweds, and get out without havin' to kill or be killed. Of course, they hadn't counted on River.

Phoebe had six shells in her when River liberated it from Jayne's pants. There were fourteen of them surrounding the tiny cabin. Contrary to Jayne's believe, Hessian Weblin had been aiming for her unborn children. He, several of his cousins and cronies, as well at three hired guns had surrounded the cabin. Because the cabin had high windows, only Hessian had had a clear aim, and even that had been bad. But she had perfect aim. Pity there weren't enough bullets to kill them all.

She ducked around the corner of the window and calculated. It would be a stretch and the bullets wouldn't go that far. There were only five who possessed a real threat to them, and she could maim them well enough to go in for the kill on Hessian with only using three bullets.

She let off three rounds. They were tiny pops and clicks, and suddenly the three hired guns were down in a heap on the ground. One even fell out of a tree, which startled Hessian out of his hidey hole. River took careful aim before pulling the trigger three more times.

By the time the troops got there, four of the fourteen were down, and five others had run off. Only the extremely stupid had stayed behind. Phoebe raised up the shotgun, and nearly flew back off the mule. Mal's ears rung painfully as he grabbed the nearest part of her to keep her from falling. He got smacked on his ringing head for the kindness.

"Don't think you folks're in the right neighborhood," Mal shouted louder than necessary.

"We surely is! That cattle-thieving bastards in there!" One of them yelled.

"Ain't nobody but a pair a newlyweds in there! I don't give no low down dirty deceivers my cabin!" Evie took aim at the branch the man sat on. She fired with out warning in the general direction, spooking the man off his perch. "Jensen Wei, yer shootin' at a pregnant woman! My son's in there and Hessian Weblin tricked you."

"Miss Evie? I - I didn't know. Hessian said he'd been robbed - he gathered a legit posse," The bumbling red-head said, holding up his hands!

The rest dropped arms and quickly followed Jensen out of the clearing. Some gathered up the three wounded men. The fourth was a lost cause. Phoebe gasped in shock, and Mal held her when she looked ready to tip over. He shuddered some his own self when he got sight a where the man had been shot. Three precise bullet holes formed a perfect line across his body. One in the head, one in the throat, and the crotch. The others had been single, maiming wounds. These had been for the pain. The one to the head had been last. There was less blood.

Zoe and Wash were yelling to River that everything was okay, that they were coming in. Evie, Mal and Phoebe raced into the house when Wash started yelling, guns drawn.

Inside, River cradled the very naked body of Jayne to her, rocking back and forth as tears streamed down her face. Wash made a disgusted face. Mal frowned, then looked at Zoe. His second only grinned.

"He ain't dead, just passed out," she answered the unspoken question.

"But he's still naked," Wash shuddered before proceeding to dry heave.