"Take Ollie with you." Kim was just finishing up a feed and Adam was heading out to fit the car seat in the back, clean up at home and grab a shower. They weren't quite prepared for their early morning arrival. Kim had gone over on her first two pregnancies so the fact that she was two weeks early had caught them off guard, that and the fact that it happened at home. It was probably better this way; Adam may have just flipped his lid if things had dragged on past her due date and Kim may have smothered him with a pillow.
"What about Daisy?"
"She can stay with me. I think Oliver would like some time with you." Adam leant down and kissed them both.
"Come on Ollie, let's leave these girls. We need to get some things done at home." Oliver jumped off the bed and was half out the door before Adam could blink but they did like that he stopped briefly by his Mom to give her a kiss and said goodbye to his brother.
While Ollie was happy to leave, Adam wasn't. Kim and Adam had talked about dealing with Ollie throughout the pregnancy. He was worried that the same thing was going to happen, that he was going to be pushed aside. Adam wasn't going to let that happen and Kim loved how determined he was to make this easy for Oliver. So while he didn't want to leave Kim he wanted to spend time with just Oliver and talk to him about how he was feeling, not that ten-year-old boys enjoyed talking about such things or anything for that matter.
The 'girlfriend' conversation a few weeks ago hadn't gone well. Adam had asked Oliver about the girl's hand he was holding when he stopped to pick him up at school one day. Oliver had dropped her hand like a hot rock when he spied his Dad and had barely looked at him as he climbed into his truck. The blush of his cheeks was cute, or at least Adam thought so.
"I first kissed a girl when I was nine. I thought I was king of the world that day." Adam offered up when Ollie gave him nothing on the way home. Usually he couldn't stop him talking and Adam didn't do awkward silences well, he was constantly trying to fill them that often led to Kim reprimanding him for saying stupid or inappropriate things. Like now. "Tracey Wheeler. Man, I loved her; I thought she was the hottest chick in the world. I was gonna marry her."
"She's not my girlfriend."
"Okay." Adam looked at him from the corner of his eye as he drove but Oliver was staring out the side window. It was obvious that he didn't want to talk about it, which Adam ignored because he wanted to know. He always wanted to know what was going on with his son. His parent's were too busy fighting and trying to one-up each other to worry about what Adam was doing and being the fire-cracker he was he found himself in trouble more times than not. "What's her name?"
"She's not my girlfriend." He repeated.
"Ollie, it's okay Buddy. Girls are cool, even if they are just friends. It's okay to like them."
"Dad." He groaned. "I'm not going to marry her. I just like her, she's fun."
"Always go for the fun ones. That's what made me fall in love with your Mom; she made me laugh. Still does and she's as gorgeous as hell."
Oliver had always loved hearing about how much his Dad loved his Mom, just not right now. "Can you please not tell Mom, she'll freak out?"
"She won't freak out." He nudged Oliver's shoulder lightly and he turned his head slightly and glared at his father. Adam should have taken that as a sign this conversation was over but he didn't. He just kept barrelling on. "Well maybe a little bit. You know how your Mom is at the moment, she's a little weepy."
"She cries all the time. She'll freak out and start hugging me or something."
"You love your Mom hugs. You know she'll be happy for you but if this girl breaks your heart she might hunt her down and flash her badge or something." Oliver laughed despite himself. He really did not want to talk about this, especially not to his parents. His mom would squeal and get all gushy and hug him constantly and his Dad, well he would just embarrass him by talking to her or something and he really did like her.
He was still staring out the window when he muttered. "Her name is Rosie."
"Rosie Ruzek." Adam really did need learn when to stop.
"Dad." Oliver banged his head on the window in frustration; he knew this was a bad idea.
Of course he told Kim, who in her pregnant state just burst into tears. Hormonal woman and temperamental pre-teens were going to be the death of him. Kim promised not to say anything to Ollie but Adam doubted that she had the ability to keep a secret. When Ollie came down for dinner Kim hugged him and he sulked all the way through dinner. Adam knew he'd been busted. He liked to think that at least Daisy was years away from this but she cracked the shits because Ava got a kitten and that wasn't fair because Daisy had asked for one first. When she was told they were not having a kitten with a new baby Daisy took off sobbing to her room and Adam was left standing in the middle of the lounge room feeling slightly battered from all sides. Some days he felt like he was just standing on the middle of a tiny island while the sea raged around him.
Kim was crying, emotional Burgess had taken up residence, Oliver wasn't talking to him at all and Daisy was sobbing about the unfairness of life… Good Times.
They stopped and grabbed some burgers and fries for lunch. Kim would freak out if she knew; she had seriously tried to rein in their junk food habit so they took every opportunity to indulge when she wasn't around. "You okay?" Adam asked him while the waited for their food.
"Yep."
"Come on Ollie, buddy talk to me."
"It's great Dad, it is. I think he's pretty cool. I was scared for Mom this morning. I didn't like how much it was hurting her."
"It was scary and it does hurt but we knew that. It's not the same Ollie." He rubbed his arm briefly; he didn't want to talk about that right now. He was on such a high from the morning and nothing was going to ruin his buzz. Talking or even thinking about Kim's ex was not what he wanted or needed. "But how good was Mom?"
"You didn't seem scared."
"Ollie, I was terrified but I had to help your Mom, freaking out would not have changed anything, that baby was coming and there was nothing we could do about it. What your Mom did this morning was amazing; you know I love her right? I never would have let anything happen to her or the baby." Adam sat back a little as the waitress delivered their lunch. "For the next couple of days I might be a little distracted with helping your Mom out. You saw what she went through and she needs to rest and take it easy for a while. It doesn't mean that I love you any less. Okay?"
"Okay." He agreed but Adam wasn't convinced.
Before heading home they hit up the shops and bought a present for the baby, they had very little stuff that wasn't gender neutral so Adam bought him the smallest pair of Chuck Taylors they could find. Ollie also wanted to get him a Cubs top with his own money so they swung by and picked one up. As Adam expected the bathroom looked like at crime scene and he threw every single towel in the wash whether they had been used or not, changed to sheets on the bed and basically scrubbed the bathroom from top to bottom.
Ollie made sure that the nursery was ready and sat the present they bought in the bassinette. They had both laughed when they bought it because Kim was going to freak out. The giraffe was so lopsided it was cute.
By the time they got back to the hospital Daisy was now stretched out on the bed watching TV while Kim was dozing off beside her. Adam kissed Kim and then gently picked up his baby and handed him to Oliver. Oliver leant against his Dad so they could talk to him about hockey and baseball, they claimed that they had to teach him right from the start and sized him up with his new jersey. No way was Atwater getting anywhere near his son with the White Sox shit. Kim quietly watched them from the bed. Her three boys and even she could see the tears in Adam's eyes when he looked up and caught her staring at them.
Daisy was starting to get a little bit of cabin fever and Kim was keen to go home. There was no point staying, the baby was feeding well and Kim was feeling about as good as she was going to get. Being at home with Adam and her children was all that she needed and Adam was feeling caged in as well, he found hospital rooms too confining and that he didn't have control here. Once they had decided to wait a day before making their announcement he wanted to get them all home and be a family for a little while.
Taking him home was exciting for all of them and both the kids sat and held one of his hands all the way home. Adam drove like an old lady so it was a slow trip home but they did love all the talking and giggling coming from the backseat as two very proud siblings reported every single thing he did and fussed over their new little brother. Daisy was a little bit of a Mother Hen when they got home but also didn't want Kim to always have the baby with her. Oliver fussed over his Mom and Adam was a whirlwind of nerves and emotion and he wanted to be involved in everything and learn about looking after his son and he was almost disappointed when he was asleep.
Kim hobbled back into their bedroom, having finally found the time to have a shower. Oliver and Daisy were asleep, it had been a long and exciting day for them and as much as Daisy wanted to stay up until he woke again Kim promised that he would still be here in the morning and she could have another cuddle then.
When she came out of the bathroom Adam was lying on the bed with him and looked in awe; he was gently touching him and stroking his feet, his hands and his face and he would smile when he squirmed or made a noise. He didn't even look at Kim but knew she was there. "I can't believe this, I can't believe that he's ours and he is here. We made something perfect again, didn't we?"
"We seem to be good at it." Kim eased herself onto the bed and they stayed there and adored their little boy. "He's beautiful."
"Like you."
"You know what makes this so special? What you did this morning. I know you missed out on so much with Oliver but in some way I think this maybe made up for it a little bit. I trusted you to look after both of us."
"I would do anything for you."
"I had faith in you. It was a perfect moment wasn't it? You, me, Oliver and Daisy and now this little man." She stroked his tiny fingers and he stretched a little bit.
"It's been a big day." Adam tucked a stray strand of hair back behind Kim's ear. "You look tired, you should sleep."
"He's nearly ready for a feed. Can I just lay here with you both until then?" Kim placed her hand on top of Adam's as it rested on their baby. "This is what I dreamed of with Oliver, you being here, us being here just looking at him." Kim started to cry softly. "I just wanted you to have this, I hate that Oliver didn't get this moment with you. I hate that I never saw you looking at Oliver the way you look at him." Adam was crying with her. "I hate that I never got to see you look at me like you have today."
Reaching out to cradle her face, his voice was crackling with emotion. "In my dreams I did, every night." They stayed there, quietly loving their little boy as he slept, getting to know him, how he felt beneath their gentle touch, his fingers and toes, his facial expressions, his hair and ears. Kim was telling him what was reminded her of Oliver and what was unique to him.
When he woke Adam changed him, he was nothing if not a diligent student. Kim asked him to run downstairs and get her an ice pack. Adam had only made one joke about it in the hospital. "What's that for?" He looked slightly bemused when a nurse bought in an icepack and Kim shoved it between her legs.
"It numbs the pain from pushing a human being out of my body."
"So your lady garden's got a little scrub fire raging through it?" The midwife did her best not to laugh and Adam's toes almost curled when he saw the look Kim was throwing him. "Not funny?" she just glared at him. "Not even a little bit." His mouth would seriously be the death of him one day.
He propped himself up next to Kim while she fed him and played with his toes and fingers. He was just infatuated by them both; it was seriously going to be fight between him and Daisy in the morning. 'Take you shirt off." Adam was peering at his little face as Kim propped him up and was gently rubbing his back; he was making all sorts of little grunts and weird facial expressions. Adam loved it.
"Whoa Darlin', I know that ice-pack numbs things up a bit but surely not that much." No wonder Daisy was getting worse, not better with her wacky comments. One thing he did know, from unfortunately deciding to take a look when the Doctor came by to examine Kim, was that it looked nasty. He was holding the baby and gently covered his eyes with his hand. "I know you've just come out of there little man, but I know you had your eyes closed and it was a wise move." Kim had not been amused at the time. His jokes may have been poorly timed and he tended to get worse in awkward situations and watching a Doctor survey the damage was definitely awkward but he would do anything for Kim right now.
"Get your mind out of the gutter. I am not talking about that. You've got quite a few weeks of tying at knot in it to go yet." Kim shook her head. "You want your magic wand to wander into my garden again I suggest you learn to keep your jokes to yourself."
"I can't believe you've done that three times."
"And no more." Adam had to agree; three kids were more than enough, more than he ever thought he'd have. He wasn't greedy; every single day he thanked his lucky stars for this woman and his family. "Take your shirt off." She demanded again as she lay her son between her legs and started to remove his clothes. Adam pulled off his t-shirt and threw it aside. "Lay back." Kim was being a little bossy and he always did like it. This wasn't going to end like it usually did though.
Gently she laid the baby on his bare chest wearing just his diaper. "I love feeling his skin on mine. It's so soft, like butter and so warm. Nothing in the world feels like this" She was watching Adam and he looked so in love with his little boy and she wiped a tear from his cheek. He'd been so emotional today.
"It's pretty amazing." He ran a hand up and down his tiny back. "Is this what it feels like when you feed him?"
"Pretty much."
Kim rolled away and grabbed her phone and she adjusted the baby into just the right position and took a few photos. Showing it to Adam he just nodded. Along his side, with his tattoo showing she had captured a photo with their tiny newborn's hand covering some of the words so all she could see was 'Is a dream..' She smiled at Adam. "You are perfect."
"Who?"
"The pair of you, together."
Daisy was in bed and cuddling her brother by seven. For someone who had burst into tears because she had a brother Daisy certainly loved him now and Oliver came in not long after. It was a beautiful morning.
Once Adam had called his mother, and listened to her crying for a good five minutes, Kim called her sister and he actually heard her squeal down the phone. His Dad was pretty damn excited too. They sat and decided how to announce their new addition to the rest of their world.
Adam took a photo of the three kids. They were lying on the bed with Oliver and Daisy on either side of their little brother. Surprisingly all their eyes were open and Adam managed to capture them all looking at the camera. It was a beautiful photo, Oliver and Daisy looked so happy and the baby was all arms and legs, he had one foot in the air and one arm stretched above his head which had made the kids laugh and that's what Adam captured, three perfect human beings. He sent the photo first. 'Look what we've got.' They waited a few minutes and as predicted both their phones exploded.
He sent another photo of just the baby to which Adam added. 'In the very early hours of yesterday morning we welcomed this little man as he made a surprise appearance at home on the bathroom floor. Weighing in at 7lbs 10ozs, 22in long and with a very healthy set of lungs, Oliver is delighted he has a brother, Daisy has stopped crying about having another brother and thinks he's probably okay and we can keep him, Kim was amazing as you would expect and I am glad I just managed to catch him.'
He then sent one more photo, the one that Kim had taken of Adam with the baby last night although all you could see was his tattoo and that perfect little hand. Our family is complete with this little man, Patrick Alvin Burgess Ruzek. Our beautiful little Paddy is a dream come true.'
The crazy was about to start. They couldn't hide away forever and while the day at home alone was perfect they were ready to share Paddy with the world now.
While Adam grabbed a quick shower Kim let Daisy ring her father. He knew that she was excited about Paddy and wanted to tell her Dad but Adam didn't want anything to do with it. She also called her Grandparents. Steve was happy for them, he really was. Daisy was the light of his life and if she was happy that's all that mattered to him.
Adam took both Oliver and Daisy out grocery shopping and left Kim's sister at home controlling the never-ending stream of visitors and flower deliveries. Amanda must have broken just about every road rule on the way because she was here in record time. It was a level of crazy he hadn't expected. Of course they also hit up the ice-cream shop and visited Al while they were out.
If anyone was going to get emotional it was Al. Family was his weakness, and this family had been his weakness for a long time. It had filled a hole in his heart so Adam wasn't surprised to see the tears in his eyes when he showed him photos of Paddy. "I can't believe his name. Patrick Alvin? Are you for real?"
"Real as a heart attack Old Man. He wouldn't be here without you."
Adam didn't need to talk about Paddy because both the kids filled Al in on every single thing that had happened. Oliver was very practical, he told Al how Paddy would stretch and squirm and make funny noises and that he sleeps a lot. "He's not very quiet." But it was Daisy's description of his birth that delivered in typical Daisy fashion that made them laugh. "Mom was on the floor, like a horse and screaming. My Adam had to catch him, he kinda came out like a poo does." Adam choked on his coffee.
"They said fuck a lot.." Al laughed while Adam frowned at Daisy and shook his head. "..and then Paddy was all gooey and he likes to cry and he's only allowed to have Mom's milk, from her boobs. Adam likes to watch Paddy feeding. I think he likes Mom's Boobies too." He really wished she would stop but Daisy was on a roll and her excitement was cute. "We both had Mommy's milk too, didn't we Ollie?" Oliver just cringed; it was not something he wanted to think about. Having learnt all about girls, sex and now childbirth it all seemed a little bit too much to be honest.
"I wanted a sister and I cried but My Adam is not allowed to put any more babies in Mommy's tummy."
Adam thanked Daisy for her colourful description and sent her off to play; he wanted to remind her about her language but they had decided that ignoring her occasional slip of the tongue was the best option. She didn't swear often and Kim always cringed when she did but Daisy had been right, they had said 'fuck' a lot that night. "So big event in your house." Al was still chuckling away at Daisy's explanation.
"It was indeed. We were pretty stunned to be honest but Kim was amazing and I just bumbled my way through it."
"Congratulations. You deserve this; you deserve this happiness. Embrace it."
"I am, believe me."
"Then what are you doing here?"
"Trying to make sure that these two don't feel left out." He pointed at his kids. "I don't want either of them to feel pushed aside because of Paddy and it was a little crazy at the house. Amanda is running interference. I don't want Oliver to go backwards."
"Oliver's not going backwards, because you won't do that to him and he knows that. He let Steve get to him last time because he already felt insecure, he feels safe now. You make him feel safe and loved and that's all he ever wanted or needed. Don't miss out on Paddy because you are worried about Oliver."
"I don't want too."
"Then go home, cuddle and love your baby. He needs his Daddy too."
Easier said than done. He had been sharing him with his parents, Kim's sister, and half of Intelligence all morning. Trudy was the latest visitor and the moment she had seen Kim she had started to cry. "Kim, I am so happy for you. He's beautiful; he looks just like Oliver." She was surprised that Adam wasn't home though, she expected to have to lever Paddy out of his arms with a crowbar.
"He's just taken the kids out the grocery store to pick up a few things, we weren't quite ready for Paddy. They all have a little bit of cabin fever. Daisy's not quite sure about all the attention Paddy's getting, it's wearing a little thin for her." Adam was also trying to do it all; he wanted everything to be perfect and for Kim not to worry about a thing. He was tyring to be the perfect husband and father to three children who needed different things from them. Oliver needed to be reassured that he was still loved just as much, Daisy wanted to be the centre of attention and Paddy needed everything.
"How is he?" Despite knowing how excited he was for this baby she was also aware that he was also anxious about the whole thing. He fussed over Kim, excessively so and Trudy had pulled him up a couple of times. He adored seeing Kim pregnant and thought she was beautiful but that didn't stop the fear.
"He's just besotted with him and a little overwhelmed I think."
"Well you wanted him to be a hands on Dad, delivering Paddy is about as hands on as it gets." Trudy had no doubt that Adam would be there at the end.
"Very true. He was wonderful, when I woke him up he freaked out, but he was always going to no matter when I went into labour, maybe it was better this way. We didn't have a lot of time to panic; it was about half an hour from start to finish. He was pretty calm and it was perfect. I really like the thought of Adam being the first person to see him and hold him and touch him. That was really special and after everything he's been through I don't think I could imagine anything more perfect than that."
"Stop." Trudy looked down at the tiny baby in her arms. "You're Mom is making me cry."
"I thought Ollie and Daisy would be a little more freaked out but they were great, they sat with me the whole way through, avoiding the business end obviously. Although Daisy did burst into tears when Adam told her he was a boy. She really wanted a sister but she seems to like him now though."
"I love his name, Patrick. Paddy really suits him."
"It's very personal for Adam, it was his choice and something he really wanted. I am not sure he wants to share the reasons why. I loved it too." Trudy could see the emotional impact it had on Kim and she squeezed her hand. Adam had never talked to anyone else about Lola and Patrick, or Lucky as he was known, it was a very small piece of that life that he held onto and the fact that it was something they could now share together through the naming of their son was a remarkably emotional experience.
"It's perfect. He's perfect." And he was, as far as Trudy, the grouchy desk Sergeant was concerned this was as good as it gets. She handed Paddy back to his mother when Adam came in and she jumped off the couch and hugged him.
"Wow, Trudy."
She pushed him away and tried to hide her watery eyes. "Don't get used to it Ruzek, this is the only hug you'll ever get from me but your beautiful Paddy has made me all emotional."
"Me too."
The whole afternoon followed a similar pattern. This had been a pretty emotional time not only for them but also for those who had been on this rollercoaster with them and eventually Adam asked Amanda to put a stop to the visitors.
She could see that Adam was getting a little frustrated with the constant visitors. He tried to be polite but would only sit for a few minutes before leaving the room and when a random Aunt turned up he refused to let her hold Paddy, citing that he was two days old and didn't need to be passed around like a football. Now that Paddy was here Adam had a new list of things to worry about.
"Can you please stop this?" He begged Amanda. "Kim needs to rest, Paddy needs to be left alone." His Aunt Evelyn turning up, who they hadn't seen in almost a year made him snap.
Adam carried him upstairs when he insisted that Kim have a rest while he was sleeping. "When did you get so bossy?" Kim teased him as she followed him upstairs.
He indicated with a nod of his head to the little baby in his arms and said. "Since you gave me this."