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Discalimer: Naruto is not mine

Hydrogen

There was no sound coming from the other room; my arms trembled as they supported my weight against the sink of the bathroom. My head bowed down over the cold water at the basin, all I could think was how sick this situation was.

Sick. Sick. What the hell is happening here?

God. I splashed the water against my face again. Is it me or is my heart beating too loudly, I could practically hear it drumming against my ribs. I can't breath. This has to be one sick joke. I can't…not again. It has to be!

The bathroom door knob jingled and turned. "How long are you going to take in there?"

"It's just not possible. It can't be possible." I raised my head and met my reflection from the bathroom mirror and stared at it. My hair is as lively and as wild as it had been sunshine blond. Water dipped from my nose where I splashed the cold water. The face I am facing now was the one I knew so very well, the one that had changed so subtly over the years into something more mature. What I am staring right now is what I looked like eight years ago. Short, chubby, awkward…

"Brother.'

I was startled out of my reverie when a hand lay over my shoulder. I whirled around, scared shitless. I scrambled till my back hits the wall.

It just can't be. Please. It can't be.

Hands held my face, "Are you okay brother?"

No. please no.

I shut my eyes tight, "I am not your brother." Funny how that came out more calm and controlled when I'm shaking like a leaf inside, he chuckled. "I am as much as a human as you are a demon. You are my kin. Isn't this what you wanted? A family, a second chance?"

Foxes are mischievous creatures. The masters of trickery.

I tried to push him away. Lord knows how much I tried but what can my body do against over a thousand year old demon even if it did have the same body structure that I have for the present? "You're wrong! I didn't want this! I didn't want any of this!"

It only has been a day. It's too raw. I can't. I can't go through that again. I'll break. Iruka-sensei..Sakura-chan…

"Just who are you trying to fool whelp!" He growled. "Over and over I could hear your thoughts for thirteen years." He slammed my head against the wall, I grimaced. "You are now part demon as I am now part human. I am your kin whether you want to or not, I would treat you as how I would my kind."

Sick. This is sick.

I felt the start of hysteria bubble up to my throat as I laughed. He let go as I slid down to the floor laughing. I had hoped I was dying. I had hoped that it would have ended and yet here it is, starting all over again. "My God." My laughter turned to hysterical sobs.

How long this time? How long this time before I loose it again and cause another massacre?

He knelt down in front of me and pulled me towards his chest where I let myself be held too tired and confused at all this bullshit to protest. "Why this?" I whispered sniffling. "Why turn back time too?'

"All that guilt for those pathetic creatures. All that regret for that imbecilic fool you had called friend," I felt more than saw him smile in a feral manner, "And it wasn't even your fault."

"It was!" I yelled back, I slammed my clenched fist at his chest cursing at the same time at this weak body of mine. "You don't understand. You can't understand."

Sasuke left because I can't… I can't give him what he needs because he doesn't need it.

His chest rumbled at his laughter, he traced one sharp fingernail at the skin of my back that made me shiver more from pain than pleasure. "Humans are such weak and fragile creatures. So easy to break, so weak minded." I winced when I felt the sharp nail pierce through my skin drawing blood and at the same time I felt it already healing even before the fox continued his ministrations in a different spot. "See?" He watched how the drops of blood spill over my backside. "The human shell can be wounded so easily."

He made a disgusted sound as he pulled my hair back forcing me to look up. "Maggots. They all are. Come now brother. You wish to repent the sins you did not commit? I gave you the chance." His hold loosened until he lets go finally. I rubbed the sore spot. "Show me what you can do this time to protect these petty creatures you're so fond of."

"What am I? Some twisted form of your entertainment!" I bristled as he stood up and sat on the edge of the bathtub. He shrugged nonchalantly. "Yes little brother. And while I watch you with your struggle you also have the responsibility to serve as my mentor as I am yours." He tested his fingers, looking at them fascinated. "Teach me how to function like… a human." The words tumbled out off his tongue as if it was something vile. "And I would teach you how to become strong. Maybe then you won't be such a pushover." He crossed his leg over the other and smirked.

"You bastard!" I tackled him making as both fall, the back of his head hitting the cement cracking. He didn't even wince and smirked even more as the blood spilled over the white tiles. We both know that it's already healing. I collapsed over his nude form heaving. "I didn't want this. I didn't want to become a demon. Please give me my humanity back. Give me my time back." I sobbed.

A hand patted me at the back. "There, there brother." The fox grinned through the mock sympathy. "Let's start anew this time as family hm?"

A second chance, Irucka-sensei, Sakura-chan, Tsunaide-baachan… Sasuke...

"You bastard fox. I hate you." I whimpered. "Hm." Arms, the same as my own wrapped around my waist. "As I you brother." He laughed. I closed my eyes and simply let myself be poisoned by his touch and the reality of the present that was eight years ago.

…………………….

"What's wrong Naruto-kun? You look like you've just seen a ghost?" I felt my beating heart skip a beat and I knew that I was staring but I couldn't find myself to care. It's like something caused a blood clot in my brain, that who I really was, who I really thought was seeing. I knew that when it hits me, it really hits me hard.

There are no halves are there?

I haven't accepted it. Not really. I had hoped that I was delusional. Insanity caused by the massacre.

I raked my hand through my damp locks and forced a grin. "I think I have." Smiling seems much harder now. The third chuckled and blew smokes from his pipe clearly not understanding. "Come now Naruto-kun. I'm not that old and frightening am I?"

I scratched the nape of my neck and laughed awkwardly. "hehe, old man your wrinkles always do scare me."

The smile faded as I trailed off, the third turned a serious yet concerned eye at my direction. "You okay Naruto-kun? Is everything alright?"

"I…I'm fine." I replied, struggling to breathe, struggling to find sense of everything. "It's… It's nothing. Nothing to worry about." I let out a grin. The grin which was more than once commented as fox like.

Sarutobi mocked a stern posture, "You're not hiding something are you? Picked another animal at the streets?"

Though it didn't look like it, I was shocked to the core at how close to home that question went. "Ahahaha…" I waved my arms in front of me. "Of course not old man. I wouldn't." I haha-ed a few times more just for the good measure. The bathroom door opened. I almost bit my tongue as I held back a curse. What lousy timing.

I dived to my closet and dug a towel throwing it to the redhead. "Aah! Kyosuke! What are you doing there naked. Do us all a favor and evaporate would you?"

Nice save.

'Kyosuke' arched an eyebrow as he caught the towel. He shrugged, clearly not bothered at his nudity instead placing the towel at his shoulders as he strode towards my bedroom. "Whatever… brother." He smirked and closed the door.

That #g A#$!.

I trailed his retreat with my eyes, delaying to inevitable of looking back to the Hokage. The third coughed. "Do you have something to say to me Naruto-kun."

Aw. Crap.