In the Grim-Darkness of the 42nd Millennium, there can be no victor.
021. M42. Segmentum Pacificus, Chiros Sector, Inquisitorial Black Ship "Aeterna Gloria", 3 AM.
He couldn't sleep.
He tried with all of his might to get a few well-earned hours of sleep, but he couldn't do it. His astartes training had served him well up until now, but what happened recently shook him to his very core, and he couldn't let go of it, finally relenting after a while as he threw off the thick fur blanket keeping him warm and sat up from his bed, placing his feet on the ground before standing and putting on a pair of slippers he had next to his bed for occasions like this. Then, he put on a pair of green-black camo shorts and put on his signature green sleeves shirt before exiting his room.
He walked to the fine dark-oak door at the entrance of his bunks and opened it, causing the cold and dry air from the outside to rush into his comparatively warm and humid room. The outside contained long sprawling halls, darkened by the dimming of the lights during the night to conserve power and help with sleep, and air conditioning systems put on colder settings to simulate the arid night.
He would begin to simply look around, trying to get his mind off what happened. To his right he would see their usual commons' area most of the higher ranking personell would occasionally visit for a bit of recaf and snacks, and to his left was both the wall and the rooms of his squad-mates. The first room was allocated to the former squad psyker, now squad lead and Inquisitorial Interrogator, Thrax, who was seemingly fast asleep inside his bunk. After the psykers bunk came the Sister Hospitaller Sylvia's Chambers, who he dared not even pry into, unless he wants to get the backhand of the Ecclesiarchy. After these two rooms came the odd one out, a barren room with only a special dirt floor and a sleeping Kriegsmen Private inside, having used a dirt hole as a sort of bed and blanket.
He slowed his pace as he finally approached the final two rooms. He put out his hand to slightly lean up against the wall and inhaled deeply as he quietly whispered to himself, "Emperor. Why must I feeleth like this?", before he marched onwards towards the last two rooms.
The first room belonged to the main companion of the former squad lead. The room belonged to the Quartermaster Kriegsmen Runda, who was the resident, well of course quartermaster and alongside that he was a dear friend to the squad lead. Contemplating actually going into his room, he decides that intruding on the territory of a fallen krieger could only lead to trouble and bad omens.
Lastly came the door of the former Leader of his squad, Lieutenant Tabby, who was among the first people he met upon joining the squad and one of the most talkative.
He would consider his situation, his hearts fell heavy for once after his augmentation into the angel of death he now was, as he thought of actually going into this one. And after considering his options and current state of mind, he relented to himself placed his thumb on the door handle, letting it scan it for a few seconds for it to give him access. This new feature was only added recently to ward away any straggling gangers or thieves plotting to rob from a room of the recently deceased. And with a click and a beep, the door acknowledged his rank, reading "Access granted. Battle-Brother He'Shan of the Salamanders.".
After sighing to himself, He'Shan finally opened the door to Tabby's room and flicked on a light. He had visited this room quite a few times over the months they've worked together, but this time the situation and feeling was different. The room was clean and untouched from when he last used it, bits of brownie crumbs still laying on the floor from what he got as gifts from his family, which the whole squad shared in enjoying. On his desk sat a book for learning high Gothic, which simply by first glance it can be seen it has been read through and used quite a few times in its service. And on a nearby bed, He'Shan would see something he hadn't in quite a while, that being the Molotov cocktail plushie he won playing a festival game with Tabby which He'Shan then gifted to him. Slowly approaching it, he would simply stare at it for a few seconds as the hum of the nearby ventilation and lights lingered in his ears as he was almost yearning for it, like a son reaching over to grab the hand of his father, he would start to reach his hand out towards the plushie but last second decide against touching it.
He'Shan would eventually leave the room. Shutting the lights off, locking it behind him and giving it one last look before he walked back to his room, looking for something.
After a second, he would move back out of his room and approach the room or the late Quartermaster and stand before his door. In his hand he held a Teddy bear which was the first he had given to the krieger when he first met them. Placing it on the ground before his room, he would take a few steps back, looking at both of the doors of the rooms he noticed something off... The breeze from the air conditioning was a lot stronger on his face than he rememberd, putting a hand over to his eyes he would feel the moisture and coldness of drying tears he had not noticed going down his face. The astartes emotional training he had been given had worked without, but he was still human deep inside and felt the loss of losing family.
As he though this, he finally took a walk back to his room, closing the door behind him, taking off his slippers, drying off his face with a towel and finally being able to go to bed. Leaving that little teddy bear before the door of the Quartermaster's bunks, so he may have one final gift from the loving Salamander.