Chapter 4
Kenny was enjoying Australia.
The landscape, the friendliness of the people and the weather had all been fantastic. A week snorkelling on the Great Barrier Reef, a roadtrip to Uluru, sight-seeing in Sydney, winery tours around the Margaret River, Australian Rules football in Melbourne, visiting relatives in Brisbane, he had enjoyed every minute of it. He felt grown up, independent. For the first time in his life, Kenny wasn't the dock leaf to Lynda's stinging nettle and he was loving it. He also had come to discover the magic that a foreign accent worked with the ladies. Sure, he was no Spike Thompson but it was definitely an advantage!
After a few months of travelling the country, he had settled in Adelaide and found work with a suburban newspaper called The Messenger. Kenny had always had a fondness for the simple day-to-day items that make up a local paper. Things like Neighbourhood Watch meetings, lost dog notices, amateur theatre reviews and school sports results made him feel part of the community. The South Australian accent – noticeably more English-sounding than the rest of the country – made him feel at home.
Of course, he still missed his friends back home in Norbridge but with the paper now online - and Billy Homer having included his email address as part of the staff mailing list – Kenny was able to keep up to date with all the happenings at the Phoenix. This usually took the form of dirty jokes forwarded on from Spike, silly attachments forwarded on from Frazz, gossip from Julie and Tiddler and the occasional message from Lynda. Struggling with the technology (as Kenny knew she would be), he never knew when he saw her name in his inbox if it would be something meant for him personally, something meant for Spike that accidently got sent to All Staff or something for All Staff that accidently got sent to Spike (that he had forwarded to All Staff).
Early one morning, he checked his Yahoo mail to find a message waiting.
To: Kenny Phillips Lynda Day (l. (none)
KENNY, COME BACK, THIS IS AN ORDER.
LYNDA
Kenny smiled and hit Reply.
To: Lynda Day (l. Kenny Re: (none)
And hello to you too, Lynda.
Please print out this email and retain for future reference.
For IT support - that means help with your computer - send an email to Billy Homer. To do this, click New Message, then in the To: field, type Billy Homer. Type your question in the message body - try to word it nicely so there is some chance he will feel like responding - and he will help you out whether he's at home or in the office.
Kind regards
Kenny
After hitting Send, Kenny got to work on a story he was researching about a local council initiative and was surprised when his Yahoo inbox reported another message from Lynda had arrived.
To: Kenny Phillips Lynda Day (l. Re: Re: (none)
thanks
Typical Lynda, thought Kenny. Short and not so sweet. Checking his watch, he calculated the time in his old home town. 10.30pm.
To: Lynda Day (l.
From: Kenny Phillips Re: (none)
What are you doing at the office so late?
The reply was swift.
To: Kenny Phillips Lynda Day (l. Re: Re: (none)
I've got 2373456374567384 articles to read by tomorrow and everyone else has gone home. Typical. Nobody ever stays to do the hard yards, everyone's too busy with their "family" and their "friends" and their "lives"!
Kenny sighed. He wasn't really that busy, the stuff on the council initiative could wait a little while. He started to type a response, suggesting she email over a few of the articles so he could read them for her when another message landed in his inbox.
To: Kenny Phillips Lynda Day (l. Re: Re: (none)
Thanks, Kenny, appreciate it. I need them back by tomorrow morning (our time)
Cheers
(see attached documents)
Kenny stared in disbelief at his computer screen.
"You cheeky – presumptious - still manipulating from the other side of the globe. You are unbelievable, Lynda Day!"
He shook his head at his own naivety. Lynda was obviously not alone in the newsroom, there was no way she could attach the correct files so quickly without assistance! Suckered again, he thought. He should send the files back unread and tell her they were fine. That would teach her to presume he would willingly drop anything to help her out!
Kenny allowed himself this brief fantasy before he opened the first attachment and began to read.