Chapter 2
The Horseman meets a Friend
The Headless Horseman staggered out the door from the Mad tea party. The rabbit and the man with the oversized hat waved to him. Soon the Horseman saw two bright yellow eyes looking at him.
"Who are you?" The horseman growled.
"If I were to be someone, first you and I would have to exist." Said the eyes, and under them formed a big smile.
"…What?" Asked the Horseman confusedly.
"Why is what?" Asked the eyes and mouth.
"WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT?" The Horseman demanded.
"If I were to be doing it, first I would have to do so." Said the eyes and mouth. The Horseman screamed and ran away as fast as he could. He reached a small clearing in the woods, with lots of flowers. The Horseman heard distant singing, and drew his sword to wreak havoc on the innocent field of pretty flowers. Just then the flower he had his sword over looked at him!
"Hello!" Said the flower. The Horseman staggered back and tripped over a tulip.
"Hello!" Said the tulip. If the Horseman had eyes or a mouth, his eyes would have been wide and his jaw would have dropped.
"DAEMONIC FLOWERS!" Cried the Horseman, hacking at the flowers wildly with his unsheathed sword. He panted and looked (or something like it) about. Flower petals were all over the ground and pieces of stems had flown everywhere. It had been a flowery massacre. All the Hippies in Sleepy Hollow would frown on him. The Horseman got up, brushed dead flower petals off himself, and began to walk again. Soon he ran into a bunch of giant playing cards. They seemed to be…painting roses?
"Hey, you!" Said the Horseman. One card turned and LOOKED AT HIM.
"Yes? What are you doing in the Queen's courtyard?" The card demanded.
"Who the heck are you and who's the Queen?" Asked the Horseman.
"The Queen of Hearts, Queen of Wonderland!" Said the card. Then he started to sob.
"What's wrong with you?" The Horseman grunted emotionlessly.
"She doesn't like me because I'm a SPADE and not a HEART!" The card wailed.
"Good for you." Said the Horseman, uninterested.
"I'm Fredrick the Spade. I'll show you to the Queen." Said the card. He tromped off. The Horseman followed him. Soon he reached a GIANT stand, on which sat a lady in a weird poofy dress.
"WHO ARE YOU?" Demanded the Queen of Hearts.
"I'm the Headless Horseman." Said the Horseman.
"How dare you come to my courtyard without permission! OFF WITH HIS HEAD…Oh my." Said the Queen, genuinely confused about how she could behead the Headless Horseman.
"I thought I'd get that sooner or later." The Horseman muttered.
"Well, do play a game of croquet with me." Said the Queen, throwing him a green flamingo.
"Ummm…"Said the Horseman. Since he didn't know he was supposed to play croquet with the flamingo, he beheaded it instead.
"Okay, maybe we won't play croquet then…"Said the Queen, shaking her head. The Horseman REALLY had to get out of here!