Everyone thinks they know me. They think that can read me like a book. They think that I'm sadist and they think that I'm cruel. They think that I don't care about anything other than causing others pain.
They couldn't be anymore wrong.
No one could understand me. No one could understand how I feel all the time. To know that my father only sees me as an object, to know that my mother and brother were forsaken is heartbreaking. Do you know what it feels like to live in constant fear? No, you couldn't possibly. You think you're secure and well taken care of. Not me. Oh, sure I may be a princess, but does that really mean anything? No, besides extra responsibilities. And another mask to hide my feelings.
I have no sense of security. I have nothing. I am nothing. No one could understand how much I hate myself. I hate the thing I've turned into. A selfish fake who is too cowardly to show how she really feels. I live in a world where finding love is a struggle.
And what have I done to help myself? I've turned my back on humanity. If they should suffer, than I will laugh. If they should cry, I will spit on them. None of them realized my pain. No one sees me. No one understands! No one could possibly grasp what it feels like to have everyone depend you. No one understands what it feels like to be a prisoner in your own home. And so, whenever something bad happens, I smile. Finally, someone who feels my own pain. Finally, in some strange way, some vindication. Some revenge. Fate screwed me over, but I should be thankful that I'm not in their shoes. I am lucky.
But I don't feel lucky at all. Sometimes I disgust myself. Whenever I look in the mirror, all I want is to reach out and tear that girl's face off. I hate her. I hate her so much. I eagerly await her death.
I eagerly await the end.