Lois was spending the night at the Kents while she was in town and as usual she had Clark's room. Since she couldn't sleep, she thought it would be fun to get a snack and watch Clark's misery on a lumpy couch. When she got downstairs, however, Clark wasn't there. She looked toward the front door and he was standing outside in his coat and shoes.
This was strange for three reasons:1.) It was the middle of the night.2.) It was summer and he was wearing a coat.3.) He looked like he was going to run wherever he was going.
"Hey, Smallville! What are you doing?" she called out.
Clark looked back with an annoyed expression. "Lois, do you have to ruin everything?"
He grumbled something about time and slow trucks and fished the keys out of his pocket. He got in his truck and took off before Lois could find out where he was going.
Luckily for Lois, she carried her keys around. You never knew when you might need them in a place like Smallville. She hopped in her car and followed. She found his truck in front of a cave. She was just in time to see a flash of light and of course she followed.
The next thing she knew they were standing in what looked like the North Pole with a huge igloo.
"What's this? Did we just find Santa's hideout or what?"
"Lois, what are you doing here?"
"That's funny! I was just about to ask you the same question."
Clark had no choice. He explained everything. He told her about his heritage, his powers, and their location. Lois never said a word but stood there taking it all in.
"As interesting as this all is, you do realize we're standing in the snow? All I have is my pajamas and slippers," and with that she began to walk toward the fortress.
Clark gave her his coat and said, "Well?"
"Well what?"
"What do you think of this?"
"It explains your weirdness, so I'm not surprised."
"You're not scared?"
"Are you going to melt my brains?"
"Uh, no."
"Then no."
"You're not even in awe?"
"Why? You're still the same old whiny farm boy. Now if you save the world with those powers in something other than plaid, then we'll talk."
"I should've known it wouldn't phase you. After you."
"Thank you."
They walked into the fortress.
"Wow, look at all this junk!" she said, picking up a crystal.
"Lois, put that down!"
"Why?" she asked as she peered through it.
"It could be dangerous!"
"Aren't you curious about your past?"
"I don't trust anything to do with Krypton," he stated firmly.
"Then why did you come here?"
"I don't know. I guess it helps me to think and I can ask Jor-El questions."
"Jor-El wouldn't give you dangerous things. He's your father. I know that doesn't always mean a whole lot but he would've just saved himself if he was a selfish jerk."
While Clark pondered this information, Lois found two bracelets. They looked like a white gold but it reflected rainbows. It also had a jewel with a color never seen before on earth. Lois being Lois tried it on.
"Doesn't this look good on me?" she asked, holding out her wrist.
"Lois!"
"Don't get jealous, Smallville! There's one for you too," she said, before slipping it on his wrist. "Now we match! Let's go shopping and we can find matching dresses."
"Very funny, ha ha," he replied as he tried to pull it off.
"For someone with super strength, you're not doing a very good job!"
"Let's see you get it off!"
They both pulled and soaked their wrists in the snow but nothing worked.
"We better go or my parents will be worried," Clark said at last.
They went back to the Kents and explained things to his parents.
Martha looked worried and asked, "Do you two feel okay?"
Jonathan asked, "Has anything weird happened?"
Both said yes to Martha and no to Jonathan.
Jonathan said, "All I know to do is go to bed and we'll figure out what to do in the morning."
"Mr. Kent, call me crazy, but shouldn't we ask his computer dad what they are and how to get them off?"
"We'll talk about it in the morning," he said in a voice brooking no argument.
After breakfast there was a knock at the door. It was Lana coming to ask Clark to a movie. Clark greeted her with a kiss and they were both blown back. Lois stood in the doorway during all this. Clark's parents were talking about the situation out back.
"Holy cow! I've heard of sparks between couples but this is ridiculous!" Lois commented, trying to defuse the situation.
"Lois, this is no time to joke!" Clark grumbled.
Lana asked, "What's going on?"
"We don't really know yet, honey," he said in gentle, sappy tones that he reserved only for Lana.
Lois walked up to Clark and kissed him. "Maybe it's Lana."
Clark just looked at her. He was too speechless from the kiss to respond. Chloe showed up before he could find his words and Lois ordered her to kiss Clark. Although surprised, she did and they were both blown back.
"Then again, maybe it is you, Clark," Lois said without batting an eyelash.
"Would you quit that! It's got something to do with the bracelets," Clark said. "Let's go. Sorry, Chloe, Lana. We'll explain later. Tell my parents we'll be back."
Clark stopped the truck in front of the house of one of his teammates.
"What are you doing now, Smallville?" Lois asked.
"An experiment. See that guy? Go kiss him."
Lois shrugged but obliged.
Lois was blown into the yard and the teammate back into his house. Lois got back into the truck. "Thanks a lot!"
"You're welcome. It has to be the bracelets without a doubt."
They went back to the fortress and Clark asked Jor-El about the bracelets.
"My son, those are to bind two people in marriage. Kryptonian marriages are permanent. They keep adultery and divorces nonexistent."
"But we didn't know what they were. Can't we get an annulment?" Clark asked.
"Yeah, Clark knows all about those," she said dryly, referring to Alicia.
Clark glared at her.
"Hold out your arms," Jor-El instructed. They complied and the bracelets fell off. "If you use those again, make sure it's with your wife and don't play around with anything until you know what it is."
"Yes, sir," he said, shooting a look at Lois that said 'did you hear that?'
They left the fortress, glad not to be married to the man/woman that irritated them the most.
10 years later…
"I now pronounce you husband and wife."
Clark Kent and Lois Lane were married willingly before God and their families. Before they set off on their honeymoon, they slipped on their Kryptonian bracelets.