Clara sat across from Elizabeth, looking at her expectantly.
Elizabeth set down her drink. "Yes?"
"How was your weekend away with Jack?" She wiggled her eyebrows.
"It was nice."
"Nice?" Clara exclaimed. "That's all you have to say about a weekend away with your dreamy boyfriend?"
Elizabeth laughed. "I don't know how I feel about you calling him 'dreamy,' but yes. It was nice to spend time with him and Harrison."
"Man, I expected some juicy stories."
"Sorry." She shrugged. "There's nothing to tell. We went swimming, made s'mores, stuff like that."
"Did he give you any hints about a certain question he could be asking soon?"
"We're taking things slow, Clara. I might be ready for that, but he's not. He has Harrison to think about, and he has everything that happened with his wife. I'm not going to push him to go faster than he's comfortable with."
"But you'll say yes when he asks?"
A smile played on her lips. "Yes. I love him, Clara. And I love his son. I want us to be a family so badly."
"Well, I hope it happens for you soon. Marriage is so great." She sighed, a contented smile coming over her face.
"You and Jesse are still in the honeymoon phase?"
Clara blushed. "I hope it never ends. It's wonderful being married to your best friend."
"I'm so happy for you two. You're great together."
"Thank you." She pulled out her lunch. "Okay, back to work talk. Fiona wants to do a check on the fox pups this afternoon, so we need to figure out how to get them away from Cotton."
"We can see if we can distract her with some food. It'll probably take both of us, though. From what I've seen, she's pretty protective of those pups."
"Yeah, I figured it would take both of us."
...
"Hey, Tom." Jack put the phone on speaker, setting it on the counter so he could continue making lunch while he talked. "What's up?"
"Nothing much. I just got back to my hotel."
"Where are you this time? Ireland?" He spread peanut butter on two slices of bread as he spoke.
"Yes. Well, Northern Ireland. Near Giant's Causeway. There are a ton of birds that nest up here, so I'm getting some pretty good pictures of all of those."
"I'd like to get over there at some point. The pictures of that northern coast are so beautiful."
"Harrison would love all the sheep over here. But you know, it could also be a good place for a honeymoon," Tom hinted.
Jack rolled his eyes. "Ha ha."
"Tell me, Jack. Why is it that you haven't popped the question yet? I saw you with Elizabeth, and it's clear you're already in deep."
"We only started dating a few months ago."
"And? You know better than anyone that life is short, and time doesn't really mean anything in the grand scheme of things. So what's the real reason you don't want to commit?"
He sighed, taking his phone with him and sinking into a nearby chair. "I'm so conflicted, Tom. I love her, and I do want to marry her. She's it for me, Tom. I know it, and my heart says go for it. But then I start thinking about buying a ring, and my mind just goes to Olive."
"You feel guilty?"
"No, not really. I mean, when I've dated before, there's definitely been some guilt that held me back. But I know Olive wouldn't have wanted me to be alone forever, and she really would've wanted Harrison to have a mom. The more I've thought about it, the more I've realized that I'm afraid. I can't lose another wife, Tom."
Tom was quiet for a few moments before he responded. "What's the alternative here, Jack? You don't get married, and then what? Elizabeth eventually leaves because she wants more, and then you're losing her anyway. Not the same way you lost Olive, but she would be out of your life. I know that I've never been married, so I can't really know what you're feeling now, but I just think you need to decide if she's worth pushing through the fear. Having seen you with her, and hearing you talk about her, I'd say the answer is yes, but you need to figure that out for yourself."
Jack blinked back tears, unsure of what to say.
"Just think about it, Jack. I'm not saying you need to go marry her tomorrow, but just think about what you could gain if you pushed past the fear."
"Thank you, Tom." His voice was thick with tears. "I promise I'll think about it."
"Good."
"Daddy?" Harrison came in from the backyard, Simba on his heels. "Lunchtime?"
"Almost." He wiped his eyes. "Say hi to Uncle Tom." He pointed at his phone, then returned to the counter to finish making their sandwiches.
"Hi, Uncle Tom!" Harrison climbed up into the chair that Jack had just vacated and picked up the phone.
"Hey, little man. How's my favorite nephew?"
"Good. You taking pictures again?"
"Yes, I am. I'm in Northern Ireland right now. You'll have to ask your daddy to show you where that is on your map."
"Okay. Uncle Tom, daddy and me and Miss Beth went swimming."
"You did?"
He nodded, even though Tom couldn't see him. "Yeah. At the lake. And Miss Rosemary and Uncle Lee and James went swimming, too."
"That sounds like so much fun, little dude. Did Simba come with you?"
"No. Simba had a sleepover with nana." He set the phone back down and climbed off the chair, sitting next to the puppy. "Simba's big now, Uncle Tom."
"I bet he'll get even bigger. Maybe even bigger than you."
Harrison laughed. "That's too big."
"Okay. Not that big, then."
Jack plated their sandwiches with some chips and fruit. "Hey, Tom. We're about to have some lunch now, so we'll talk to you later."
"Okay. Don't forget what we talked about."
"I won't. Love you, Tom."
"Love you, big brother. Love you, Harrison."
"Bye, Uncle Tom." Harrison waved at the phone. "Love you."
...
Jack leaned back on the sofa, holding the picture of Olive up in front of him. He sighed. "Liv, I don't know what to do. Losing you broke me apart. What if I lose her, too? I don't know if I could get through another loss. And what would that do to Harrison? He loves her so much. Is it really worth the potential to feel that kind of pain again?"
"Daddy?" Harrison appeared in the hallway, rubbing his eyes.
"I'm right here, bud." Jack sat up. "What's going on?"
"I had a nightmare."
"I'm sorry, Harrison. Why don't you come here?" He held out his arms, lifting Harrison into his lap. "Do you want to tell me about it?"
"A monster."
"There was a monster? What did the monster do?"
"He took Miss Beth." The little boy started to cry, tucking his head into Jack's shoulder.
Jack rubbed his back. "Shh. It's okay. It was just a dream. Miss Beth is just fine."
Harrison shook his head. "But the monster. He took her away forever."
"Here. Why don't I call Miss Beth? Then you can see that she's okay." He reached for his phone, keeping one arm around Harrison.
"Jack?" Elizabeth squinted into the phone screen. "Is everything okay?"
"I'm sorry for calling so late. I know I probably woke you, but I have a very scared little boy right here who needed to see that you're okay."
"Poor thing." She sat up, combing her fingers through her hair. "I'm right here, Harrison. Did you have a bad dream?"
He nodded, still clutching Jack's shirt. "I don't want the monster to take you away."
"That won't happen, Harrison. I promise. I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere."
"See, bud?" Jack kissed the top of his son's head. "Miss Beth is just fine. I won't let anything happen to her."
"Miss Beth sing."
"You want me to sing to you?"
He nodded, relaxing into Jack's chest.
She started singing quietly, the first song that came into her mind, How Great Thou Art.
By the time she'd gotten through the second stanza, Harrison was fast asleep.
Jack smiled, running his fingers through the little boy's hair. "You have a beautiful voice."
"Thank you." She blushed. "He's okay now?"
"Yeah." He sighed. "It's been a while since he's had a bad dream."
"Any idea what brought this one on?"
He shook his head. "Not a clue."
"Well, if it happens again, feel free to call me to reassure him, no matter what time it is."
"Thank you, Beth." He gave her a little smile. "I wish you were here, so I could kiss you."
"You'll just have to make up for it the next time you see me." She gave him a mischievous grin. "I should let you get Harrison back to bed. Good night, Jack."
"Good night, Beth, and thank you again for helping Harrison."
"Of course. I love that little boy so much. And I love you."
Jack warmed at her words. "I love you, too."
After the call ended, Jack carried Harrison into his room and carefully laid him on the bed, pulling the blanket up to cover him.
"Sweet dreams, Harrison. Everything is going to be okay," he whispered, dropping a kiss on Harrison's forehead.
He retired to his own room after, lying back with his arm behind his head.
"Can I get past the fear?" he spoke aloud to himself. "Is loving her forever worth it?"
...
"Elizabeth," Jack took her hands and sighed. "We need to talk."
"Should I be worried?"
"No. No." He shook his head. "There are just some things I've been thinking about. I talked to Tom the other day, and between that and Harrison's nightmare the other night, it really showed me that I need to stop shying away from discussing our future."
"Oh?"
"I know you've been hesitant to speak concretely about where we're headed, and I want to thank you for that. I wasn't really ready for those conversations."
"I never wanted to push you."
"And you didn't." He cupped her cheek in his hand. "Until you and I reconnected, I thought that I couldn't move on because I felt guilty. Olive was the love of my life. How could I love somebody else?" He gently brushed his thumb along her jaw. "But then you were there, encouraging me without pushing, loving me, loving Harrison. I fell in love with you so fast, Elizabeth, and I realized it wasn't guilt holding me back all these years. It was fear. I never really put that together until I talked to Tom a few days ago." He swallowed the lump that was forming in his throat. "It was such a shock to me when I lost Olive. One minute, she was there, and the next, she was gone. It tore me apart, and it took me so long to come to terms with her death. I guess I've just been afraid all this time. I don't," his voice cracked, "I don't know that I could survive another loss like that."
Elizabeth reached over and wiped a tear from his cheek. "Thank you for sharing all of that with me."
Instead of providing him with reassurances or advice, she just wrapped her arms around him, comforting him. He pulled her into his lap, resting his head against her shoulder. They sat like that for what felt like hours, just relishing the warmth of the other.
She had nearly dozed off when she felt his lips on her neck. She tilted her head to the side, and he kissed his way up to her face. When their lips finally met, she felt his urgency. His hands moved under her shirt and up her stomach.
"Jack." She took hold of his wrists. "Not now."
"I'm sorry, Elizabeth." He shifted her off his lap, releasing a harsh breath as he ran a hand through his hair.
"Hey." She touched his cheek. "I want to, Jack. You have no idea how much I want to. Just not here. Not now. After everything you shared with me today, I don't want you to feel like you have to prove anything to me." She kissed him softly, pulling back with a smile. "I know you love me. I know the pain you've faced in your life can make this relationship difficult for you at times. But like I told Harrison the other night, I'm not going anywhere."
"You are a saint, Elizabeth Thatcher."
"Hardly." She chuckled. "Just a woman in love."